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bella05
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Topic: Your opinion is appreciated Posted: Dec 06 2012 at 5:52pm |
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Hi all,
I need sincere advises.... Here is the story: I am in the late 30" and married with a 5 yo girl. I am a full time student as well. Until 2 months ago we had a nanny for our 5 yo. My husband works out of town and travels Sundays and return Wednesdays or Thursdays. Since we don't have anyone to watch after my kid after school, my husband has been working from home and it looks like he have to go back to traveling. We sign up to a Nanny agency and had couple applications. We got 2 applications 2 days ago that fit our description ( Live In Nanny ). One of the applicant is a attractive 25 yo girl and single, the other one is a 48 yo lady with some grown kids on her one. I choosed the 48 yo lady because I think she has experience with kids etc...My husband said that he doesn't want her without any specific reason. He wanted the 25 yo girl. We went into discussion yesterday and I told him my decision is the 48 yo. Today, after school, I noticed that he already sent the Job application to the 25 yo and called her. Yesterday, he said that she will come from NY to us this week end and plan to stay if things work out since she doesn't have anybody in our City. He didn't contacted the 48 yo lady.
My question is: Ladies....can you hire a 25 yo attractive girl as Live In Nanny ? My husband is home Thursdays and Fridays alone ( our daughter goes to school ) and I work/go to school everyday.
Please only sincere advises.
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Miss SDY
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Joined: Mar 10 2011
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Posted: Dec 06 2012 at 8:11pm |
Is there a particular reason why your husband wants the 25 year old to nanny? I would find that pretty odd. Well, do you trust your husband enough to be alone with the nanny while you are at work? Well tbh I would not want to bring a 'potential problem' into my home..
I think it is odd that he is so against the 48 year old being the nanny and is adamant about the 25 year old being the nanny.. What is his EXACT reasoning for this?
But afterall, if a man has his mind set on cheating, he will cheat regardless.
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bella05
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Posted: Dec 06 2012 at 8:29pm |
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Thanks for responding...
His reasoning is that the 25 yo can play with my daughter and that the 48 yo may not be physically fit especially she looks a little big on her picture. Also the fact that the 25 yo has stated that she needs the job urgently etc... I think my husband is not the type to cheat but which lady is 100% sure?
The reason I am posting here is because apparently she is coming this week end to our town and knows nobody here and I think she is also planing to stay with us based on what my husband told her.
My husband and I fought about this yesterday and we are not talking to each other.
I was planing NOT to even let her enter my house and even call the police if there is resistance etc....and just wanted to make sure that I am not overreacting or being mean ( especially it is a 3 hours flight from her place to ours).
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Limalady
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Posted: Dec 06 2012 at 10:37pm |
bella05 wrote:
Thanks for responding...
His reasoning is that the 25 yo can play with my daughter and that the 48 yo may not be physically fit especially she looks a little big on her picture. Also the fact that the 25 yo has stated that she needs the job urgently etc... I think my husband is not the type to cheat but which lady is 100% sure?
The reason I am posting here is because apparently she is coming this week end to our town and knows nobody here and I think she is also planing to stay with us based on what my husband told her.
My husband and I fought about this yesterday and we are not talking to each other.
I was planing NOT to even let her enter my house and even call the police if there is resistance etc....and just wanted to make sure that I am not overreacting or being mean ( especially it is a 3 hours flight from her place to ours).
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That's a dumb reason. I'm sure she'll be able to play with the kids.
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Prazol60
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Joined: Sep 14 2012
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Posted: Dec 07 2012 at 9:41am |
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I find it very odd that you two disagreed on this and your husband went
froth with hiring this young woman. If you are the one who'll be home
the most then it should be somebody you feel the most comfortable with.
The two of you got some problems if he thought it was ok to do this
behind your back. This makes me wonder, what else might he do behind
your back? You have a right to be angry.
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bella05
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Posted: Dec 07 2012 at 12:53pm |
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We finally talked today and he told me that he called the 48 yo lady yesterday and that she was very rude and unprofessional on the phone which is a red flag. I am not sure if he did call her or has just tough about a more political way to get rid of her. And then he told me that he will be traveling again next week for work and need someone urgently ( I go to school somedays until 9 PM) and that the 25 yo would be a perfect fit. He is threatening me now that he will hold me responsible if he loses his job for not been able to travel. We live in a small city and it is hard to find someone unless you are ready to shed a lot of money.
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sugabanana
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Posted: Dec 07 2012 at 1:14pm |
Go with the 48 yo. Obivously the agency had to clear her inorder for them to sign her up. This should be a decision for the both of you and not just your husband. Besides I find it weird that your husband is so into the decision of who nannies the child. 90% of the time the mother or wife makes that decision. Your mind will go crazy trying to think what might be going down while your at school and work when he's at home.
Opportunity creates temptation... The girl has no where to go if you hire her then decide to kick her out. Seem like your husband will defend her instead of you. Clingy alert!!!! NO NO NO
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morenaloca
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Posted: Dec 08 2012 at 3:32pm |
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I agree with the other posters who say it's suspect for him to contact her even though you didn't agree on it as well as not having a valid reason to not like the older lady. I do not like to make other women paranoid about their men cheating but the whole situation is just very strange to me. "Big" people can be active, too. You should meet both women in person first before making a decision. Good luck.
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TopBeautyHair
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Posted: Dec 12 2012 at 12:52am |
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The older one have more experience and patience to take care of your kids.Before you hire the yo girl you have distrust.May be It'll going worse.That's a mine point,just for reference.
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