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Ww cries b/c Bw takes Yoga Class (XOjane)

 
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (7) Thanks(7)   Quote keepgrowing Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 30 2014 at 9:05am
Has someone posted this one yet? The title alone had me dying

CryLOL

http://ht.ly/t52MN

fuJane – It Happened To Me: I Saw A White Person Buy Jerk Chicken and I Couldn’t Handle It

by Calvin on January 29, 2014 in Blog

January is always a funny month at jerk chicken restaurants. For some reason, people are just hungrier for white meat with a little kick to it. A few weeks ago, I went into my favorite jerk chicken restaurant Fire Fowl and I saw an older heavyset gentleman walk in. He was slightly balding and had a Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young T-shirt on. He glanced around awkwardly, looking bespectacled and Caucasian as he ordered the jerk chicken with rice and peas.

And then he sat down, took one bite and started to sweat profusely! Oh no, I thought. I could see him looking panicked and frightfully alone. Within the first few minutes, he was frantically gulping at his water. Cry What could I do? Here I was, sitting in a booth with my tastefully tacky Izod sweater and my three seasons ago Beats By Dre headphones around my neck and here was this guy sweating through his hopelessly outdated shirt. Because I was directly across from this guy, I couldn’t help but stare at his poor pale out-of-shape man pain and it pained me.

Even though I had zero evidence, I could feel his eyes burning into my head as he stared at me calmly eating my peppered rice and peas. And I thought, what did I do to deserve this??? I became aware of my perfect mahogany skin and an ideal weight of 160 pounds as I continue to fork up the chicken. And I could feel his hostility, could virtually hear him shouting “Damn your Jamaican genes!” LOL I thought about offering him a glass of milk, but…I couldn’t. I just couldn’t. So I turned away and deliberately avoided the eye contact that I don’t think I received but I’m pretty sure I received.

At the end of the meal, I went straight home and my eyes welled up with tears. Primarily the tears came from the burning sensation on my tongue, but there was also the guilt. The guilt! I thought of all the times that black people thoughtlessly oppressed white people. I thought of the pain white people felt when Macklemore was criticized for co-opting rap music and gay rights for a Grammy. I cried thinking of how I oppressed Miley Cyrus by complaining about her terrible twerking and use of black people as props. I beat my fists against my chest as I thought of how unfair it was that Lupita Nyongo stole that SAG award from a well-meaning white actress. DeadCryLOL

I’m sorry, you guys, I just broke down. Jerk chicken restaurants are a safe space for me and they’ve helped me through difficult times like when I skipped lunch and needed to get dinner before running off to do a comedy open mic. Now everything felt deeply suspect. Could I eat chicken again, knowing full well what my ingestion of it can do to the psyches of those poor defenseless white stomachs? I couldn’t believe that this is how it feels to get a glimpse of the spice-shaming that I put white people through on a daily basis.

I’ll still go to that jerk chicken restaurant though, but I’ve opened my eyes to the feelings of white people. I once was lost but now I’m found. In conclusion, America.



Edited by keepgrowing - Jan 30 2014 at 9:15am
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote jonesable Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 30 2014 at 9:07am
Can't get pass that title
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote GoodGirlGoneGr8 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 30 2014 at 9:07am
I can't with these responses...
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (3) Thanks(3)   Quote GG Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 30 2014 at 9:29am
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ms_wonderland Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 30 2014 at 9:41am
lmfao
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Rumbera Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 30 2014 at 10:43am
LOL
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote yurika975 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 30 2014 at 12:41pm
I am wiping my eyes. CryLOL
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (4) Thanks(4)   Quote Alias_Avi Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 30 2014 at 1:41pm
bblackgoldd:    oh man 😍
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