Black Hair Media Forum Homepage
BHM BHM BHM
Forum Home Forum Home > Lets Talk > Talk, Talk, and More Talk
  New Posts New Posts RSS Feed - Womens, how hard is it NOT to have kids?!?!
  FAQ FAQ  Forum Search   Register Register  Login Login
 

Womens, how hard is it NOT to have kids?!?!

 
 Post Reply Post Reply Page  <1 1617181920 60>




The Best Human Hair Available with No Service Match

Author
 Rating: Topic Rating: 24 Votes, Average 2.67  Topic Search Topic Search  Topic Options Topic Options
EPITOME View Drop Down
Platinum Member
Platinum Member
Avatar

Joined: Feb 08 2007
Location: Escarpin
Status: Offline
Points: 424669
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (2) Thanks(2)   Quote EPITOME Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 04 2013 at 5:24pm
Originally posted by maysay1 maysay1 wrote:

Originally posted by EPITOME EPITOME wrote:

Originally posted by maysay1 maysay1 wrote:

I feel like single parents shouldn't even have time to date...every minute should either be devoted to your child or yourself. Especially if you have more than one child.


so the time that is devoted to yourself can involve dating no?


In my opinion, no.

Basically, all your time should be spent focused on your child. By devoting time to yourself I meant, improving your skills/education/job if you're in that situation or resting from all the time you have to spend with your child. You shouldn't have time left over for dating.

If you have a co-parent, then I can see how you might have time. But in that case, you're not a single parent so this doesn't apply.

this is not always a problem
Back to Top
Sponsored Links


Back to Top
maysay1 View Drop Down
Elite Member
Elite Member
Avatar

Joined: Jul 02 2009
Status: Offline
Points: 71793
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote maysay1 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 04 2013 at 5:26pm
Originally posted by EPITOME EPITOME wrote:

Originally posted by maysay1 maysay1 wrote:

Originally posted by EPITOME EPITOME wrote:

Originally posted by maysay1 maysay1 wrote:

I feel like single parents shouldn't even have time to date...every minute should either be devoted to your child or yourself. Especially if you have more than one child.


so the time that is devoted to yourself can involve dating no?


In my opinion, no.

Basically, all your time should be spent focused on your child. By devoting time to yourself I meant, improving your skills/education/job if you're in that situation or resting from all the time you have to spend with your child. You shouldn't have time left over for dating.

If you have a co-parent, then I can see how you might have time. But in that case, you're not a single parent so this doesn't apply.

this is not always a problem


Right, that's why I said if they're in that type of situation where improving those things would help them...which most single parents are.
Back to Top
ms_wonderland View Drop Down
Elite Member
Elite Member
Avatar

Joined: Apr 05 2009
Location: TTT
Status: Offline
Points: 263150
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote ms_wonderland Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 04 2013 at 5:26pm
i know a widowed mother of 3 who lives like this but it couldn't be me.  if done responsibly, you might be able to nab a really good step-dad.
Back to Top
ShadyLady View Drop Down
Elite Member
Elite Member
Avatar

Joined: Sep 11 2011
Location: US-Florida
Status: Offline
Points: 102548
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote ShadyLady Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 04 2013 at 5:27pm
Originally posted by maysay1 maysay1 wrote:

Ya know...a dude with kids might not be so bad now that I think about it. Not for a serious relationship obviously...but as a short term person to have fun with...that could work.



Just don't meet or interact with the kids(s) AT ALL. They get all attached and weird.

Anyway, my boo has a son. I always said I would never date another man with kids after I had a bad experience in the past. Just so happens the person I met and caught feelings for came with a different kinda ba ge than I did lol.

It's not really drama cuz his son is a pre-teen so him and baby mama have long since worked out their issues and she lives outta state.

It's had its hard times at some points, but he is worth it.

Back to Top
Finesseful View Drop Down
VIP Member
VIP Member
Avatar

Joined: Jan 04 2013
Location: Kansas
Status: Offline
Points: 38284
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (6) Thanks(6)   Quote Finesseful Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 04 2013 at 5:32pm
Maysay is right. These single parents spend more time trying to get up under somebody new than raising their kids. If you have a small child wtf are you doing always in the street? This goes for women AND men. Guys think they are exempt from active parenting because they don't have custody.
Back to Top
ms_wonderland View Drop Down
Elite Member
Elite Member
Avatar

Joined: Apr 05 2009
Location: TTT
Status: Offline
Points: 263150
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (6) Thanks(6)   Quote ms_wonderland Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 04 2013 at 5:37pm
i don't think your children will suffer if you go out on a date or enjoy a ladies night every now and then.  all work and no play doesn't always make someone the best person they can be...everyone needs an outlet and being a parent shouldn't be like a prison sentence.  if we are talking extremes, of course no one should be out all the time but every now and then really won't matter.
Back to Top
jonesable View Drop Down
Elite Member
Elite Member
Avatar

Joined: Oct 12 2010
Location: SC
Status: Offline
Points: 265927
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote jonesable Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 04 2013 at 5:39pm
A night out and me time every now and then is a good thing for the parent.

The child will be ok .
There is another parent and if the other isn't around someone in the support system who they trust.

Edited by jonesable - Feb 04 2013 at 5:40pm
Back to Top
OoDles O View Drop Down
Elite Member
Elite Member
Avatar

Joined: Oct 13 2009
Location: Cambodia
Status: Offline
Points: 42785
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote OoDles O Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 04 2013 at 5:40pm
How do you active parent without custody?
Back to Top
maysay1 View Drop Down
Elite Member
Elite Member
Avatar

Joined: Jul 02 2009
Status: Offline
Points: 71793
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (5) Thanks(5)   Quote maysay1 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 04 2013 at 5:40pm
Originally posted by Finesseful Finesseful wrote:

Maysay is right. These single parents spend more time trying to get up under somebody new than raising their kids. If you have a small child wtf are you doing always in the street? This goes for women AND men. Guys think they are exempt from active parenting because they don't have custody.


That kills me. I was out with a friend and her cousins once (back in high school, he was older) and her cousin wanted to buy an outfit for his daughter but he didn't know what size clothes or shoes to get nor what colors she liked or anything. Clearly you don't spend enough time with your child if you don't know what size she wears.

And maybe you can't visit every day and eat dinner with them or read a bedtime story, but what's to stop you from picking up the phone and talking to them every day...nothing but the fact that you don't care enough to even try to be a good parent.
Back to Top
CamiK View Drop Down
Elite Member
Elite Member
Avatar

Joined: Feb 22 2010
Location: US - Florida
Status: Offline
Points: 79173
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (4) Thanks(4)   Quote CamiK Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 04 2013 at 5:42pm
So a single parent should neverrrrr date and be alone until the child/children are grown?? Da fuk?
Back to Top
Get Longer Healthier Faster Growing Hair
GreatGlam.com
Get Healthier Stronger Longer Hair
The Elite Hair Care Sorority
Electric Cherry Hair
Hair Extensions Wefted Hair Wigs and More
Human Hair Wigs
Wefting Training
Beautfiully Created Human Hair Extensions
The Haircare Solution for Locs and Twists
DHT Blocker System
 Post Reply Post Reply Page  <1 1617181920 60>
  Share Topic   

Forum Jump Forum Permissions View Drop Down