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GoodGirlGoneGr8 View Drop Down
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    Posted: Apr 08 2014 at 8:28pm
...stay in abusive relationships and/or go back to their abusers?

The Eva Pigford story and a few examples in my family got me thinkin. Like, a man is threatening to you and your child, has hit you numerous times in the past, disrespects you...yet he's taken back.

I don't understand the logic.
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OhMyCurlz View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (3) Thanks(3)   Quote OhMyCurlz Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Apr 08 2014 at 8:32pm
Because abuse is psychological. You pity your abuser, sympathize with them and have an allegiance to them. You look over their faults and the times they "just got mad" for the few times where they say they are "sorry" and never will do it again. They ostracize you from the rest of the world and make you feel as if they are the only ones that 'care' about you. It's a slippery slope. Getting punched isn't how it always starts off. 

You love them and hate them at the same time, but you always have hope that they will change back to the person they once were before. 

It's very similar to why children still love and have an allegiance to their mothers even when they are abusive. 

They also make you feel like you are what causes their anger. It's your fault. 

More women should be aware of the psychological effects of abuse. 


Edited by OhMyCurlz - Apr 08 2014 at 8:35pm
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rell85 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (2) Thanks(2)   Quote rell85 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Apr 08 2014 at 8:36pm
They're scared to be alone...not sure if they can do it all.
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Benni View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Benni Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Apr 08 2014 at 8:37pm
Crap like this will/should only happen once. It is one time too many.
I am a quick study.

Once is enough !!!

How can she have any credibility when all her stuff is out there for public scrutiny.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ModelessDiva Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Apr 08 2014 at 8:41pm
some women are pressed to have men in their lives

some just dont know their worth

others have emotional/mental issues
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liesnalibis View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (4) Thanks(4)   Quote liesnalibis Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Apr 08 2014 at 8:43pm
Stockholm Syndrome.
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OhMyCurlz View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (4) Thanks(4)   Quote OhMyCurlz Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Apr 08 2014 at 8:44pm
Originally posted by liesnalibis liesnalibis wrote:

Stockholm Syndrome.

Thank you ma'm. 

I have this when it comes to my mother...badly and it bothers me that people around me are so unsympathetic. They have no idea how much they make it worse. It's horrible to be abused by someone mentally, emotionally, physically, etc...when you have people on the outside judging you for something that you are the victim of.... it's very disheartening. You know you're phucked up...people acting like you are weak, a loser, stupid, worthless, dependent etc doesn't make it any better. It's like salt in a wound. 

That's why I hate when people ask "why are you still with that person that hurts you".....hell most people who are going through that DONT know themselves. 

Support makes a difference. 


Edited by OhMyCurlz - Apr 08 2014 at 8:51pm
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nekamarie83 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (3) Thanks(3)   Quote nekamarie83 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Apr 08 2014 at 8:50pm
Originally posted by OhMyCurlz OhMyCurlz wrote:

Because abuse is psychological.
All this. (Wo)men will rationalize/minimize all sorts of abusive behavior--physical, mental, spiritual, economical, verbal, etc… I've witnessed it IRL & on here as well.

It gets to a point that the flaws in logic are ingrained and their version of reality.

Takes a lot to beak through that.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote thewonderfulwa Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Apr 08 2014 at 8:57pm
Some of the women are afraid to leave because theyre being supported by the abuser or have been threatened theyre a million reasons that a woman would choose to stay with a man all that emotional/physical abuse has to take a toll on them.
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Princess Grace View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Princess Grace Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Apr 08 2014 at 9:07pm

That was not the first time he has snatched her up, she just thought the baby would get her a pass.  Its sad and something I would never understand.

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