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When women give too much to soon

 
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Printer_Ink View Drop Down
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    Posted: Mar 25 2014 at 12:16pm
I just ran across this - but it will expire shortly.

Bottom line - it's what I have been saying all along .. 'do not sleep with a guy until you give it a couple of months to see who he is .. or else you are setting yourself up for pain'.

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote Marcelo22 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 26 2014 at 7:24am
What's so magical about the 2 month mark? 
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (5) Thanks(5)   Quote Printer_Ink Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 26 2014 at 5:07pm
It doesn't have to be EXACTLY 2 months ... it can be 3 or 4 months actually. :)

Geesh, if that guy is interested in you ... he can wait the 2 -3 months. If he just wants sex ..he will drop you after a few dates and move on to the next girl he thinks he can trick. Is it better to be dumped before or AFTER you give up the sex. Duh!

So it just HAS to be long enough for you to KNOW what kind of guy you are dealing with BEFORE you let him into your life, your heart AND your bed. Otherwise you are likely to end up the same bad situation again and again.

This would be the opposite of sleeping with him on the 3rd date because the chemistry is so good. :(

This is the GREAT mistake sooo many women make.

If you don't place some value on yourself .. neither will he.

Edited by Printer_Ink - Mar 26 2014 at 5:21pm
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote rsylbebe Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 27 2014 at 1:28pm
I agree with waiting and I also think a woman shouldn't tell the guy how long she is waiting before she has sex cause then the guy will just act right for that period of time  and then after they have sex they will leave, if that is all they are after.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (6) Thanks(6)   Quote TOUSHA11 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 27 2014 at 7:58pm
I disagree with you A man will wait a woman out if that is what it takes if Sex is all he wants. You do need to take your time getting to know a person before you have sex with them. But do not think because you waited X amount of months or years that it guarantees you that he will stay with you. People fake all the time all you can do is hope you are making the right decision and go from there.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Angel2011 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 27 2014 at 9:26pm
@Printer_Ink i totally agree with youuuuuuu
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (2) Thanks(2)   Quote Printer_Ink Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 28 2014 at 4:54pm
Okay ... I didn't say to TELL THE GUY you have to wait X time before sex. Then yes, he can play along until the 2 month cutoff .. and then expect sex .. THEN dump you. Duh!

As I explained ... the GOAL is to get to know who you are dealing with and that takes time. If you can date a guy regularly, know his last name (hee hee!), where he lives, where he works, his family and his friends ... chances are .. this guy has a real interest in you.

It will be hard for some guy that's just playing the part long enough to get sex out of you to go through all that exposure to his REAL life.

First off ... once he dumps you .. you know where he lives/works .. so you can come knocking one day. :O

Usually these users are ducking and weaving with all sorts of stories to keep you OUTSIDE of their real life. That way they can get sex out of you and fade away. Very common .. that's why you've got to learn how to distinguish a man that is relationship material from the many, many guys that just want to hit it ... and move on.

In my experience the best way to separate the decent men from the losers .. is to say NO and see how he reacts. (shrugs) Keep saying NO .. until you find out 'who is is'. If he dumps you ... fine .. let him try the next desparate female in line. A lot of guys are like this ... just going from bed to bed.

So, I think ppl have to stop focusing on the actual amount of time and look at the reason behind why you have to wait ... a_long_enough ... to know what you are dealing with - but 2 - 3 months of seeing him regularly will do the trick.

Of course, you have to be smart about it. You have to be involved with your own friends, running you own life so that you are not AVAILABLE everytime he wants to see you. Make him wait. (shrugs) nIf he can WAIT on you ... for when your schedule frees up .. fine.

Set the pace.

Funny thing is ... most of the time after a couple of months you start to see who he really is ... and then you are glad you didn't sleep with him anyway!

Edited by Printer_Ink - Mar 28 2014 at 5:12pm
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote Printer_Ink Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 29 2014 at 12:53am
Another critical point is ... once you see what kind of guy he is - believe it.

Don't make excuses for his bad behavior (because you want things to work out anyway).

If he's always checking out other girls when around you, he's broke, borrowing money from people, into drugs, a drunk and the list goes on .. you have to have enough self-esteem to know you deserve better ...and move on.

The only reason these kinds of men even have a girl is because so many women have their own issues ... so they are willing to tolerate these men in their lives.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Majesty02 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 30 2014 at 4:29pm
5 Star post.
Soooo true, and several points of validity
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote Printer_Ink Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 31 2014 at 6:12am
Yes, but most women will ignore this thread anyway. :(

I think a lot of women feel validation in life in their accomplishments, their education, their work, they way they feel about themselves etc.. and a relationship comes second. Then there are women that measure their validation based on 'being in a relationship' and everything else comes .... second. See the difference?

So then they HAVE to be with a guy ... no matter what and that's when they start having problems.

I just talked to a woman at the MAC makeup counter .. buying this and that and discussing moisterizers etc for over 50 skin types. Of course she was shocked and wanted to know my secret for looking young.

I told her (aside from genetics) it's living a GOOD life that keeps you looking good as you age - so number 1 IMO is NOT staying with the wrong men.

It will mess you up.

I have sooo many gfs that look like HECK but it's because they stayed with that ratfink guy that we all knew was a loser. Even the most educated women fall victim - because though they got an education - they were raised to believe that you have to get MARRIED etc.

After 40 years old or so .. it allllll starts to show with your looks,your health, and everything.

Anyway, I told that young woman - either be alone and wait for the right guy or be with a nice guy that makes you feel good about yourself .. if you want to 'age well' and have a good life. Otherwise you risk being one of those angry, devastated females you see walking down the steet.

Most folks on this board will ignore that advice too. Oh well. Can't 'say' no one ever told them though.

Edited by Printer_Ink - Mar 31 2014 at 6:26am
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