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When nothing in your life works out

 
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rickysrose View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote rickysrose Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Dec 08 2012 at 12:50pm
this isn't art of attraction or whatever it is 

but sit with yourself, quietly, no distractions, for however long it takes, days if necessary and seriously, meticulously evaluate what you REALLY believed or believe about whatever situation, circumstance, goal, plan that's bothering you - it might take some time but it's worth it

sometimes they way some of us use "hope" manifests itself in genuinely believing for the worst, convinced that it will happen and hope is just to brace us from it

there's a difference between what we want to happen and what we believe will happen and we unconsciously/consciously work towards making what we truly believe happen




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JoliePoufiasse View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote JoliePoufiasse Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Dec 08 2012 at 12:53pm
Originally posted by Jewelsnyc Jewelsnyc wrote:

To better assist you Jolie, please expound on what exactly is going on?

Is it love life related? Job related? Body image related?
 
Oh and to expand on that a little further, it's all of the above. Except that I have taken proactive steps to tackle the last two (continuing education, working out and taking care of my body in general). I was hoping to tackle the love life issue once I get myself into better shape but I might end up jobless by then Dead
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote JoliePoufiasse Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Dec 08 2012 at 12:55pm
Originally posted by babyk94 babyk94 wrote:

Originally posted by JoliePoufiasse JoliePoufiasse wrote:



Right now, it's job related but all the other factors apply.
I sense that I'm about to be laid off. YET AGAIN. And I'm sick of it. I try so hard to maintain a proper career in my field but it seems like wherever I go, I'm not accepted. Got this job a few months ago and was doing relatively fine but now some things that have been said to me/cues are leading me to believe that my past at my previous job is tainting their opinion of me (I had a really bitchy boss before and I believe that she knows my current boss, from some of the remarks she's been throwing at me lately.
 
Plus I have a manipulator on my team and a racist manager from another departement giving me problems and I've been there done that before. It seems like I always lose to these people, no matter how unfair the situation and I'm just TIRED.
Awwwwww hugs. Don't let them bring you down just keep doing your very best.
 
This is the second company in a row, babyk. I've been through this before, so I know the signs. It's difficult being the only black woman there and I'm not the most outgoing personality, so that doesn't help, I suppose. I'm no pushover though and I will defend myself when slighted but even that ends up blowing up in my face
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Addicted19034 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote Addicted19034 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Dec 08 2012 at 12:55pm
If at first you don't succeed ( dont succeed) dust yourself off and try again, you can dust it off and try again, try again, you can.

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote Jewelsnyc Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Dec 08 2012 at 12:57pm
Jo you've got to be proactive with everything, not just your health. If you're having a feeling of possibly being laid off, start looking for another job. I would go as far as arranging a meeting with my Boss to discuss if they're happy with your performance. This will at least bring any issues to the forefront, or at least you'll know where you stand.

I've been where you are many times in my life. And the only thing that has helped me is prayer. And I'm not a religious person, but what I pray for is clarity, for understanding, patience and insight on what I need to do...in other words...I'm making my spirit still...so I can clear my mind to think about what I need to do. lol...I guess it's called mediating too...either way, it really helped.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote babyk94 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Dec 08 2012 at 12:58pm
Originally posted by JoliePoufiasse JoliePoufiasse wrote:


Originally posted by babyk94 babyk94 wrote:

Originally posted by JoliePoufiasse JoliePoufiasse wrote:



Right now, it's job related but all the other factors apply.
I sense that I'm about to be laid off. YET AGAIN. And I'm sick of it. I try so hard to maintain a proper career in my field but it seems like wherever I go, I'm not accepted. Got this job a few months ago and was doing relatively fine but now some things that have been said to me/cues are leading me to believe that my past at my previous job is tainting their opinion of me (I had a really bitchy boss before and I believe that she knows my current boss, from some of the remarks she's been throwing at me lately.
 
Plus I have a manipulator on my team and a racist manager from another departement giving me problems and I've been there done that before. It seems like I always lose to these people, no matter how unfair the situation and I'm just TIRED.
Awwwwww hugs. Don't let them bring you down just keep doing your very best.

 
This is the second company in a row, babyk. I've been through this before, so I know the signs. It's difficult being the only black woman there and I'm not the most outgoing personality, so that doesn't help, I suppose. I'm no pushover though and I will defend myself when slighted but even that ends up blowing up in my face
What career field are you in? I hate to see people sad
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JoliePoufiasse View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote JoliePoufiasse Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Dec 08 2012 at 1:00pm
Originally posted by rickysrose rickysrose wrote:

this isn't art of attraction or whatever it is 

but sit with yourself, quietly, no distractions, for however long it takes, days if necessary and seriously, meticulously evaluate what you REALLY believed or believe about whatever situation, circumstance, goal, plan that's bothering you - it might take some time but it's worth it

sometimes they way some of us use "hope" manifests itself in genuinely believing for the worst, convinced that it will happen and hope is just to brace us from it

there's a difference between what we want to happen and what we believe will happen and we unconsciously/consciously work towards making what we truly believe happen
 
I hear what you're saying Ricky. But aside from committing to therapy and working on my issues the best I can, what else can I do? I wasn't expecting this job experience to go sour when I took it. I saw it as a fresh start. Except that it turns out my manager knows the former manager at my former company, who I suspect is strongly talking shyt about me AND there's a new big boss in the company who just HAPPENS to be the same one from my last job, who probably signed my laying off in the first place. I have unfair perceptions working against me from my last job and I'm dealing with racism. I AM SO TIRED. I'VE BEEN STRONG FOR SO LONG BUT NOW I'M TIRED





Edited by JoliePoufiasse - Dec 08 2012 at 1:01pm
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rickysrose View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote rickysrose Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Dec 08 2012 at 1:01pm
I didn't see the rest of the posts until now

If you're feeling like you may have another bout of depression, make an appointment with your doctor.   Maybe getting the jump on it before you're overwhelmed with stave off a deep depression.

JP you admit you do impeccable work and your past doesn't really matter, you are creating your own relationship with this new boss/coworkers.  Manipulators eventually hang themselves, given enough rope.   As far as you know now, you are not laid off.   If you want to start fresh, you can look for another job but as of today you are not laid off.



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JoliePoufiasse View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote JoliePoufiasse Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Dec 08 2012 at 1:04pm
Originally posted by Addicted19034 Addicted19034 wrote:

If at first you don't succeed ( dont succeed) dust yourself off and try again, you can dust it off and try again, try again, you can.

How many times, though??? I'm in my forties. I've had so many bad experiences, it's taking a toll (at one former job, they had me locked in an office for 6 months doing absolutely nothing before laying me off. And that manager would go into meetings telling things like "I'm not racist but..." I'm sick of this shyt
 
@baby: I'm a translator
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Jewelsnyc Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Dec 08 2012 at 1:05pm
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