Vendors and Secrecy

sexibeach wrote: CherryAde wrote: I appreciate the info in the stickies but sometimes the info is outdated... vendors, methods, quality etc is constantly changing so maybe people ask because they require more current info... It's so sad that BHM threads go from 0 - Ugly in half a page... I feel that a higher ranking member could have asked the same question and people would have flocked around in agreement and not opposition << That's bandwagoning lol It isn't outdated it still applies all of it, even the vendor's b/c the newer vendors that have come out since those listed ain't about nothing.. so they wouldn't never have made the list, those on that list are TRIED AND TRUE.. and have been in the business longer than these later one's have ever been.. you need relationships established with them to get the best of quality they have to offer.. and if you just got in the game, the game is now played, you really don't know what good quality is b/c its not like it use to be anymore.. All the hair we got back in 2005 was all high quality hair, that is no longer available.. all was cuticle hair, I could get 24 inches of cuticle aligned hair for 150 those days  long are over..  but this site is full of folks that don't want to learn anymore, they don't have anything new to contribute.. the tips and tricks are the only one's that have been established I can't tell you how many times I see a thread and the tip was mine, and folks act like they came up with it.. Vet's have left here for many reasons, aren't any now.. b/c this board is no longer about learning, its about telling things so they don't have to learn..  i've helped thousands, i've been that one that answered the same damn questions a thousand times, b/c I was a moderator on this board.. but folks don't care that you help them at all.. they don't understand if you don't learn for yourself even if you get their vendor you won't know what to do with the wig when you get it.. then the next thread is blaming everybody but themselves about their purchase.. you can't help those that don't want to help themselves..  Becky, LeeWhite, Glory and Bre told the truth.. the lurking hasn't been long enough to understand how this board as always been, and for the most part its ALWAYS been about helping..but its had its very ugly side as well, called scamming big time, so folks are very alert b/c we've seen much more than you have apparently.. that's why its a waste of time to explain it, you've not lurked long enough to know about all the scamming, b/c the lace wig game is scandalous, its serious business you don't even have a clue how deep it can get.. and there has been MORE scamming from members than there has ever been by vendors.. YES the Members scam.. but your offended b/c you don't have that understanding, when you shouldn't be..b/c no one has ever been obligated to give any information to anybody, if they did its been b/c there was a sisterhood, that no longer exists on this board..

I hear you Sexi, I truly do. 


Maybe out dated was the wrong word but what I'm trying to say is that there seems to be a kind of 'whats hot' compilation of CV's that pop up every so often like WBW and this new Roman. Whilst their quality may not be of a certain or even consistent standard, quality and longevity of a unit can be an externality for some people due to financial constraint, preference or lack of knowledge... 

Sometimes when people phish for vendor info its simply because they want to now what other recommendable CV's are out there. I don't really see anything wrong with that and I hate to see people shot down when just asking. Whether its been said 1000 times before or not, I  understand the frustration but what if that person doesn't know the ' you gotta earn your stripes culture' of this board? What if they are on their LW journey, came across this site, read a few post and then decided to ask a question (that is how most forums work)  only to be met with sarcasm, hostility and 'do a search'. The 'you gotta earn your stripes attitude' I understand to an extent but you never know who's sitting there behind that PC. I work with vulnerable adults who come to me not even knowing what 'right click' is...

It must be frustrating seeing the same thing over and over on a board but there isn't any need for people to get so ugly so quickly. 

I agree, people definitely  do use and abuse BHM but unfortunately, that has become the nature of the internet... It's a big place. I have seen countless YT Guru's and Bloggers regurgitating BHM info in particular Sexi's methods tips and tricks but seems like nowadays, unless you come out and claim ownership of those things, people will pass them off as their own. It's really not fair but as they say, you either play the game or be played. 


Sorry for the long post... This wasn't all aimed at you Sexi, just having a bit of a rant and I guess I'm just disappointed in the downward spiral this forum has taken. It could have been something great... like you said, "there was a sisterhood that no longer exists on this board"

out of lurk mode >> CAN'T WE ALL JUST GET ALONG >>back into lurk mode

The board doesn't share as it use to but normally, if you pm a person they would either tell you good vendors (in their opinion) and/or guide you into helping you find a vendor for you plus even help with specs. Research and guidance do go hand to hand especially when dealing with Chinese vendors.   I noticed mostly in the weave sections, that there are the occasional people who don't want to do any research whatsoever but want you to give them your vendor to start a company <~~~~this usually piss me off simply because there isn't any effort on their part.
I know it seems kinda wrong for people not share but there are too many instances when sharing ends biting the person who gave the information in the butt.

As Sexi stated there has been so much scamming on this board.  When the OP first stated she was from another board (and gave the name) ~ and she had been lurking on this board since 07 and still doesn't know any reputable Vendors !!!  That should tell you she had another motive for opening the discussion.  We don't take to kindly to hidden agenda's....