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Tough Love vs. "Judgmental"

 
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Babydoll9163 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (2) Thanks(2)   Quote Babydoll9163 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Dec 21 2012 at 5:20pm
Originally posted by tatee tatee wrote:

sound advice often sounds judgmental when youre not used to getting it.

This.

But people love to put the "mind your business" label on sound advice too. Anything to not have to inspect their own doings.
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FarraFace View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote FarraFace Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Dec 21 2012 at 9:44pm
Originally posted by BeatriceBean BeatriceBean wrote:

Why is it that you can't give anyone some tough love today without being stamped "judgmental" or "condescending"? I understand that there is a line and some things don't really need to be said, but why does it seem like real talk has to be dipped in caramel and wrapped in a bow? It's good to be someone's cheerleader but at a certain point, someone who cares should give it straight because they actually believe that this person can do better.
 

I'm just tired of seeing people (our people especially) continue to be coddled into either mediocrity or failure.

 

/End Rant

*preach gif*
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rickysrose View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote rickysrose Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Dec 21 2012 at 9:59pm
you can give tough love a soft touch
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lovelife View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote lovelife Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Dec 21 2012 at 10:03pm
it's in the delivery and what comes next.
i lost one of my best friends ever due to tough love Cry
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khivey View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote khivey Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Dec 22 2012 at 5:49am
Only three people in my life have given me tough love and I hold on tight to them. My father, aunt and the love of my life. Anyways...it really does depend on the delivery. If it is harsh, I may get real quiet and I just think on it and later on down the road I realize that is how I needed to hear it. When it is delivered with a soft touch..it doesn't have the same effect as the harsher one. I prefer it harshLOL

I give it to my niece all of the time and there was a time I thought she despised me...she didn't really f* with me too much..but then we got back close again and one day out of the blue she made me tear up with an email she sent thanking me for giving it to her real all those times and how she appreciates it.

That girl will come around and thank that person one day when she realizes why said person told her what to do with that money. Sometimes people need to experience things for themselves and make mistakes too. At least you tried to help...if it is all love at the end of the day things will be all good again.


Edited by khivey - Dec 22 2012 at 11:02am
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