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MizzAmirah
Elite Member
Joined: Feb 02 2009
Status: Offline
Points: 28498
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Posted: Dec 21 2012 at 2:58pm |
BeatriceBean wrote:
Bunnyahh wrote:
examples so we can speak on it? |
A 19-year-old young lady buys her boyfriend an X-box and games for Christmas. She is not in school, works at a grocery store, lives with mother, has no car, and her family has been on the brink of eviction several times.
Someone hops in and says, Girl you better save that money and let him buy his own X-box!
Girl, her mother, her sister blow up someone's phone all damn day talking about how judgmental this person is, telling her to mind her own damn business and let the girl live.
Just an example |
She's an idiot. Judgmental my ass. People love to play the "judgmental" card when you aint sugar coating things for them. I get called that every now and then. Truth must be told.
Edited by MizzAmirah - Dec 21 2012 at 3:01pm
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SoutherNtellect
Platinum Member
Joined: Jan 02 2007
Status: Offline
Points: 198988
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Posted: Dec 21 2012 at 2:58pm |
looks @ example theres no good way to tell a person how to spend their money
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jonesable
Elite Member
Joined: Oct 12 2010
Location: SC
Status: Offline
Points: 300728
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Posted: Dec 21 2012 at 2:59pm |
I don't mind tough love but who and how matters.
If I think my little sister is being dumb about her "bf" I just take her phone and other messaging devices and tell her she's being a thirsty trick and it ain't cute.
I was totally spazzing out yesterday she took all my ish and told me I'm gonna be a lonely with dry cooch.
We try to protect each other from basicness
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tatee
Elite Member
Joined: Jun 09 2006
Status: Offline
Points: 406835
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Posted: Dec 21 2012 at 3:00pm |
sound advice often sounds judgmental when youre not used to getting it.
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iSMILE13
Elite Member
Joined: Dec 23 2011
Status: Offline
Points: 14400
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Posted: Dec 21 2012 at 3:01pm |
Too many people want to tip-toe around topics.
I prefer that you give it to me straight....no chaser.
I'm gonna be salty at first but I will get over it. My friends and family have saved me from a lot of different scenarios.
Edited by iSMILE13 - Dec 21 2012 at 3:02pm
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Bunnyahh
Guest Group
Joined: Aug 14 2009
Location: ♥ Cloud 9 ♥
Status: Offline
Points: 162121
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Posted: Dec 21 2012 at 3:03pm |
Flowing-Ice wrote:
lmao... um that isn't judgmental.
sounds like she comes from a family which encourages her messed up priorities. |
and the more ppl wanna ignore what's hurting them, the more that they prove that professor right. blks don't do well cuz we as Lino says
"They have a culture that seems not to encourage achievement," he said. "Failure is not looked upon with disgrace."
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BeatriceBean
Elite Member
Joined: Jun 18 2009
Status: Offline
Points: 75704
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Posted: Dec 21 2012 at 3:04pm |
SoutherNtellect wrote:
depends on the person
i dont respond to tough love. i'll shut down and respond with equal or worse bluntness
9 times out of 10 the person knows what they need to do, ur tough love or coddling wont make a difference |
I disagree. 9 times out of 10 the person knows what they want to do, they know what they will do, but that doesn't mean that they know what they need to do. And just because that person is determined to do it doesn't mean that their friends and loved ones need to watch idly or turn their heads.
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PurplePhase
Platinum Member
Joined: Jun 08 2004
Status: Offline
Points: 232642
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Posted: Dec 21 2012 at 3:05pm |
I'm familiar with that example.
BB, how was your party?
Edited by PurpleHaze - Dec 21 2012 at 3:07pm
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Bunnyahh
Guest Group
Joined: Aug 14 2009
Location: ♥ Cloud 9 ♥
Status: Offline
Points: 162121
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Posted: Dec 21 2012 at 3:06pm |
BeatriceBean wrote:
SoutherNtellect wrote:
depends on the person
i dont respond to tough love. i'll shut down and respond with equal or worse bluntness
9 times out of 10 the person knows what they need to do, ur tough love or coddling wont make a difference |
I disagree. 9 times out of 10 the person knows what they want to do, they know what they will do, but that doesn't mean that they know what they need to do. And just because that person is determined to do it doesn't mean that their friends and loved ones need to watch idly or turn their heads. |
cs
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Derri
Elite Member
Joined: Jul 26 2008
Location: Paradise
Status: Offline
Points: 74306
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Posted: Dec 21 2012 at 3:07pm |
jonesable wrote:
I don't mind tough love but who and how matters.
If I think my little sister is being dumb about her "bf" I just take her phone and other messaging devices and tell her she's being a thirsty trick and it ain't cute.
I was totally spazzing out yesterday she took all my ish and told me I'm gonna be a lonely with dry cooch.
We try to protect each other from basicness |
yo...you need to quit. I tried to told you.
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