Honouring thy mother and father?

As other’s have said, I think what will hinder a relationship with God in this situation is an inability to forgive.  When one can’t forgive, they eventually allow bitterness to set in.  When bitterness of any kind is allowed to fester it will eventually rot and hinder your sanctification (not your salvation/justification), which is the process by which the Holy Spirit makes us more like Christ in all that we do, think, and say.  But keep in mind that sanctification is a lifelong process, so you need not feel bad - just continue to pray that the Lord, through His Holy Spirit, helps you be more like Christ in this and all situations.  

In regards to loving your mother, I encourage you to separate emotional love (which is always conditional and fails) from the love that Christ displayed and commands of all believers (which is unconditional and never fails). 

We are not only commanded to love other Christians, but everyone!

• Matthew 5:43-48: “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor, and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, love your enemies, and pray for those who persecute you in order that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven; for He causes His sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.  For if you love those who love you, what reward have you?  Do not even the tax-gatherers do the same? And if you greet your brothers only, what do you do more than others? Do not even the Gentiles do the same?  Therefore you are to be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect.”
• Matthew 22:39: "You shall love your neighbor as yourself."

What kind of love is commanded?

• 1 Corinthians 13:5-8: "Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails; but if there are gifts of prophecy, they will be done away; if there are tongues, they will cease; if there is knowledge, it will be done away."

Why this kind of Merciful Love?

• Matthew 5:7: "Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy."
• John 13:35: “By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.”
• 2 Corinthians 8:21: “for we have regard for what is honorable, not only in the sight of the Lord, but also in the sight of men.”
• James 2:13: "For judgment will be merciless to one who has shown no mercy; mercy triumphs over judgment."

My personal application as an example:

As a baby my drug-addicted mother left me in a hotel room, which consequentially led to ~ 17 years in foster care enduring all kinds of mental, physical, and sexual abuse.  I was beaten repeatedly with belts, wire hangers, and wooden sticks among other things and sometimes I was even put in steaming hot water so the welts that formed from the beating would sting even more; I was told I was dumb, stupid, good-for-nothing, ugly, etc. on a daily basis; I was treated like a maid/servant; I was raped and sexually victimized by a few different men; I was locked in basements and even make to sleep outside; and the list goes on and on and on. 

Now while I’ve never met my mother or my father, I can tell you that I don’t feel any ill will towards her (or him); and if I ever did meet her, I wouldn’t throw in her face what her unrighteousness actions lead to in my life.  What I would do is thank her for ultimately letting me go, because it is only by the life that I’ve lived that I am now more convinced than ever that I am only here today because God Himself kept me.  I remember as a child/teen I would sing this song to myself when I was scared [which was often] – “I love you, I love you, I love you Lord today, because you cared for me, in such a special way . . .” – and I would immediately feel safe and comforted.  I thank God that He let me know through that song that everything would be all right because He was caring for me in a special way. 

I only have to look at the fact that I am here today, self-sufficient and happy, to know that my God is real.  In fact, anytime I think about my mother and my life, I can do nothing but thank God that in His Divine Providence, He allowed me to escape the terrible statistics that face foster youth and other minority youth in my community.  Then on top of all of these earthly mercies, God graciously sent His only son to atone for my sins 2000 years ago so that I could dwell eternally with Him in the future.  What a Mighty and Merciful God I serve, and because of all that He’s done for me, the least I can do is obey Him by honoring and loving my mother in the way that Christ commanded and taught me (see e.g., Luke 23:34): by praying that God, within His Will, has Mercy on her just as He has had mercy on me.

See how God ultimately and rightly always gets the glory  HTHs.