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Tips on getting along with your mother

 
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ThatGurlD View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (3) Thanks(3)   Quote ThatGurlD Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 30 2014 at 6:51pm
Originally posted by NJHairLuv NJHairLuv wrote:

Originally posted by naturesgift naturesgift wrote:

I am not sure what to do I am kinda stressed!


1. Smile and shut up.

2. Just listen to her talk and nod & smile.

3. Pay close attention to how your dad responds when she begins to nags and learn to mimic his time tested technique without adding any variances.

4. Distract her when she gets negative by telling her some random gossipy story about cheating spouses, illegitimate babies, her favorite tv personality or whatever topics you have heard her talk about for hours on the phone with her friends/family.

5. Smile and shut up some more and give her the puppy dog eyes Embarrassed if she doesnt stop whatever she is fussing about.

6. Hide all new purchases & store receipts b4 she visits or she will pick a fight over you spending too much money. Her natural maternal instincts push her to search for something to boss you and nag you about, so just clear out some of the things that will trigger her.

7. Keep in mind that she loves you unconditionally and is the one that will love you on your worse day and have that in mind when it becomes difficult to smile and shut upLOL

I love my momma, but it is a fact that some women over menopause develop a naggy personality that gets worse with age so I just have to work around that by constantly distracting her by changing the subject.



Heart all of this

I realized my biggest issue with my mama was that she ran her home a certain way and was very particular about it......well so am I and it's not her way.  So she'll come over and start "fixing" things until there's visible steam coming out of my ears.

Then, in July 2012, I almost lost her.  Her mother and sister died from sudden cardiac death young.  She had already outlived both of them but you know she tried it.  She ended up in critical care and when she was strong enough got a pacemaker/defibrillator.  I remember staring at her just wanting her to nag me about anything.  I was playing music, this one song called Glorify Your Name.  She started to intermittently sing along.  She was still very out of it and hadn't yet open her eyes but was singing Glorify Your Name.  I never cried so hard for my mama before or since.

Now, I just smile to myself because I would much rather have her driving me crazy than not have her at all.
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herwoman View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote herwoman Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 30 2014 at 8:01pm
Originally posted by spencer4hire spencer4hire wrote:

I'm just so thankful that my son and I have always
had a really good relationship ( he's 24 ). We don't agree on
everything but we respect each other's opinion and we talk
about any issues that might arise .

Open communication is a good place to start. Most
parents truly want what's best for their kids.

I still struggle with the fact that he is no longer a little boy lol
He reminds me on occasion to allow him to make his own
decisions .
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aNgElIc*SoUl View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote aNgElIc*SoUl Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 30 2014 at 8:21pm
I don't know, I had to cut that bytch off.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote kerysdream7 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 30 2014 at 8:27pm
Originally posted by NJHairLuv NJHairLuv wrote:

Originally posted by naturesgift naturesgift wrote:

I am not sure what to do I am kinda stressed!


7. Keep in mind that she loves you unconditionally and is the one that will love you on your worse day and have that in mind when it becomes difficult to smile and shut upLOL

This all day! Ain't NOTHIN' like a Mother's love.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Ladycoils Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 30 2014 at 10:45pm
I got nothing for you. I just went home to visit and my mother got on nerves I couldn't wait to get on the plane. Patience and stand your ground with respect. Most parents haven't adapted to the fact that we are adults and they should treat us as adults.
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Midna View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Midna Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 30 2014 at 11:32pm
I don't even talk to mine anymore

It's better that way, in my case. Peaceful.
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petiteone29 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote petiteone29 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 30 2014 at 11:55pm
Originally posted by spencer4hire spencer4hire wrote:

I'm just so thankful that my son and I have always
had a really good relationship ( he's 24 ). We don't agree on
everything but we respect each other's opinion and we talk
about any issues that might arise .

Open communication is a good place to start. Most
parents truly want what's best for their kids.

I still struggle with the fact that he is no longer a little boy lol
He reminds me on occasion to allow him to make his own
decisions .

Me and my 13 yr old son are really close like that too. I hope we stay that way. We talk openly about everything. I am not ready to let him be an adult in 5 years but I know I have to let go.
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PurplePhase View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote PurplePhase Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 31 2014 at 12:18am
That's so special, Petite and Spencer.
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2cute View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote 2cute Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 31 2014 at 9:57am
Seems like since this year started, my relationship with my mom has started to deteriorate. Her nagging and negative mentality are driving me insane. Her old school ways and me always choosing to stand my ground and voicing my opinion resulted in her putting her hands on me and me fighting back. We never fought before😕
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote NJHairLuv Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 31 2014 at 11:16am
Does hormone replacement therapy prevent this nagging/negative behavior? I know that all women dont get like this, even without hormone replacement therapy, but Im just curious.

I recently started some research on the 'nagging mother' anxiety disorder, but I know that when my mom used to take the estrogen around menopause and for years after, she was not nagging/negative like this.


Edited by NJHairLuv - May 31 2014 at 11:25am
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