I think it gets down to what you mean by 'friends'.
I do not hang out, call or otherwise 'spend time' with an ex bf but if I am walking down the street and run into him .. sure, I will stop and have a polite conversation with him .. but that's it.
That's because I don't hold any bad feelings no matter who dumped who. btw (I would never go back with an old boyfriend. It's harddddd to get it right .. the second time around.
But if your ex is still in your life .. like you call him when your car won't start, you text him that his favorite singer will be in town for a concert etc ummm that means something else is going on.
- you stilll want him in your life so maybe you broke it off with him too soon? If he broke it off with you .. you are trying to remain in his life anyway. IMO there is no good way for this situation to end. One of you broke it off for a reason .. and probably that reason will resurface again.
- either of you is still around so that whenever you want company for something like a dinner thingy .. you have a built in 'date'. You don't have to go alone etc. (So you use each other as a crutch)
- he dumped you .. but he drops by at 3:00 and rolls in bed with you because it's comfortable/easy sex for him and .. he knows you still want him back - so basically he is taking advanatage of the situation for free sex. Maybe it's just good sex on both sides (so then you are in a sexual relationship).
- maybe the 2 of you are really good buddies ... but the next man in your life definitely will not understand that arrangement .. so then this friendship keeps other men out of your life and you can't have a real relationship with anyone.
And ... if he starts seeing someone.. you are gonna have to stand there and be nice about it .. because since you are 'friends/buddies' .. he feels he can tell you all about her! Wow ... now that would be a case of Chinese Water torture.
Maybe you didn't even realize you wanted him back until this other girl turns up.
All of the above are kind of dead end situations. Best to go back to being 'friendly enough to speak on the street'
so that there is room in your heart for a someone new.
Edited by Printer_Ink - Sep 21 2013 at 5:07am