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This black man.

 
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zsazsa View Drop Down
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    Posted: Nov 09 2013 at 6:17pm
http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2013/nov/09/i-hate-being-a-black-man

I am on my phone so can't paste the article.. can someone please paste it for me.

he lost me when he started talking about black features
Ishooooooos I say.
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Why I hate being a black man

We espouse 'black is beautiful', but the true image of blackness is ugly. If we confront our self-hatred, maybe we'll have real pride
young black men bus
Two young passengers on a bus wait for it to stop before getting off. Photograph: Antonio Olmos

Every time I sit on a crowded street car, bus, or subway train in Toronto, I know I will have an empty seat next to me. It's like a broken record. Sometimes I don't mind having the extra space, but other times I feel awkward, uncomfortable, and annoyed.

I know I have good hygiene, I dress appropriately, and I mind my own business. However, recently, I finally became cognizant of why people might fear being around me or in close proximity to me: I am a black male. Although Canadian society presents the façade of multiculturalismthe truth is Canada has a serious problem with the issue of race.

I didn't realize it until my sister said to me:

Orville, people are afraid of you. You are a six foot tall black man with broad shoulders.

My sister is right, people don't sit next to me on the street car, the subway or on the bus because they are afraid.

The issue of black self-hatred is something I am supposed to pretend does not exist. However, the great French psychiatrist Frantz Fanon wrote about this issue in his ground breaking book Black Skin White Masks in a chapter called "the Lived Experience of the Black Man". According to Fanon, the black man is viewed in the third person, and he isn't seen as a three-dimensional human being. The black man internalizes the perspectives of white society and its negative thoughts about blackness affect his psyche. In the chapter, Fanon discusses a white child calling him the "N word" and how he becomes cognizant of how he is different and viewed as someone people should fear.

There is also a fear by some black people that discussing the issue of self-hatred is a sign of weakness. There is a discourse that black people engender: that black is beautiful. But the truth is, the image of blackness is ugly – at least it's perceived that way. There is nothing special or wonderful about being a black male – it is a life of misery and shame.

The issue of black self-hatred is usually depicted from a female point of view. There are documentaries such as Dark Girls which aired on Oprah's OWN network earlier this year, in which black women discuss their feelings of self hatred for having dark skin. There are numerous books, articles, documentaries, and essays published by black female writers describing black self-hated. Black women are not afraid to speak out about their self-loathing, yet for some reason, black men are silent about our own contempt for what we are.

A lot of black men don't want to acknowledge the feelings of disgust we have for ourselves. It is considered emasculating to even admit the existence of such thoughts. I think my own self-hated manifests from the exterior, from the outside world. It is born out of the despair and the unhappiness I see within a lot of young black men.

I can honestly say I hate being a black male. Although black people like to wax poetic about loving their label I hate "being black". I just don't fit into a neat category of the stereotypical views people have of black men. In popular culture black men are recognized in three areas: sports, crime, and entertainment. I hate rap music, I hate most sports, and I like listening to rock music such as PJ Harvey, Morrissey, and Tracy Chapman. I have nothing in common with the archetypes about the black male.

There is so much negativity and criminal suspicion associated with being a black male in Toronto. Yet, I don't have a criminal record, and I certainly don't associate with criminals. In fact, I abhor violence, and I resent being compared to young black males (or young people of any race) who are lazy, not disciplined, or delinquent. Usually, when black male youth are discussed in Toronto, it is about something going wrong.

Honestly, who would want to be black? Who would want people to be terrified of you and not want to sit next to you on public transportation?

Who would want to have this dark skin, broad nose, large thick lips, and wake up in the morning being despised by the rest of the world?

A lot of the time I feel like my skin color is like my personal prison, something that I have no control over, for I am judged just because of the way I look.

Not discussing the issue doesn't mean it is going to go away. In fact, by ignoring the issue, it simply lurks underneath the surface. I believe a dialogue about self hatred should be brought to the fore in the public sphere, so that some sort of healing and the development of true non-label based pride can occur.

Of course, I do not want to have these feelings, to have these dark thoughts about being a black man. However, I cannot deny that this is the way I feel. I don't want to be ashamed of being a black man; I just want to be treated as an individual based on the content of my character, and not just based on the colour of my skin.

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zsazsa View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (2) Thanks(2)   Quote zsazsa Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 09 2013 at 6:25pm
Thank you so much wonder. That article had me heated. Self hatred is s mfker
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote GG Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 09 2013 at 6:27pm
There's some really tortured souls out there...
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ms_wonderland Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 09 2013 at 6:29pm
he's the type of dude to pull an Amanda Miller


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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (2) Thanks(2)   Quote maysay1 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 09 2013 at 6:37pm
Originally posted by ms_wonderland ms_wonderland wrote:

A lot of black men don't want to acknowledge the feelings of disgust we have for ourselves. It is considered emasculating to even admit the existence of such thoughts. I think my own self-hated manifests from the exterior, from the outside world. It is born out of the despair and the unhappiness I see within a lot of young black men.




I agree with this but I'm sure my perspective is different than his. Black boys/men are taught that they are worthless, criminal, deadbeat parents, dumb, barbaric, unable to achieve, and unattractive (unless they fit a specific look). Sadly, they are not given a space to even acknowledge these feelings, even within our own community.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote thewonderfulwa Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 09 2013 at 6:40pm
Who is forcing him to be black there are things he could do to make him feel more comfortable
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (4) Thanks(4)   Quote bindy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 09 2013 at 6:41pm
I bet he dates white women....exclusively.....or at least would like to.......
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote jonesable Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 09 2013 at 6:43pm
Yes self hate is an issue
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (2) Thanks(2)   Quote melikey Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 09 2013 at 6:55pm
Well, at least he admits it?
He isn't rare.
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