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SamoneLenior View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (4) Thanks(4)   Quote SamoneLenior Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 07 2013 at 10:23am
Originally posted by EPITOME EPITOME wrote:

Originally posted by mzmee mzmee wrote:

I promise the debil rose up in me and though "Beat that wainch's ass and pit her out!!" but that's not the best response. lol



lol....yeah the first is rage.
then i would start to doubt myself and my parenting and trying to figure out what i did wrong
i would heavily blame myself
and then i would think back to the times when i didnt have any kids and could spend money on myself and was freeCry


this made me lol
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SamoneLenior View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote SamoneLenior Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 07 2013 at 10:24am
Originally posted by mzmee mzmee wrote:

Originally posted by babyk94 babyk94 wrote:

This is a really tough situation and I feel for the mother, her daughter is seeking attention and validation from boys because of her low self esteem. I think she needs some type of intervention.
And see this was the reasoning behind why we do what we do. To help empower our little ladies, help with self-esteem so they won't have to seek validation. I thought we were doing well. Now I wonder if the other girls are faking the funk.


can't save them all
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tasty0619 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (3) Thanks(3)   Quote tasty0619 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 07 2013 at 10:26am
How is her relationship with her father? 

You don't have to answer but that may be the cause of her attention seeking behavior.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (5) Thanks(5)   Quote babyk94 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 07 2013 at 10:28am
Originally posted by mzmee mzmee wrote:

Originally posted by babyk94 babyk94 wrote:

This is a really tough situation and I feel for the mother, her daughter is seeking attention and validation from boys because of her low self esteem. I think she needs some type of intervention.


And see this was the reasoning behind why we do what we do. To help empower our little ladies, help with self-esteem so they won't have to seek validation. I thought we were doing well. Now I wonder if the other girls are faking the funk.
A lot of teens fake the funk for their parents, I'm 18 my mom doesn't know half the sh*t I've done but, I think what you guys have been doing is a good thing. I think the girl needs a therapist because there is definitely an underlying problem.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote mzmee Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 07 2013 at 10:29am
Originally posted by tasty0619 tasty0619 wrote:

I would take her to my gyn, and talk to her...maybe even take her to a therapist.

Also, ya'll should have a talk with all the girls about STDs and the not so fun side of sex with plenty of gory pics. Encourage them to use condoms, and since they may already be doing it behind your back without them, maybe buy them condoms.

NVM I just refreshed and saw she has herpes Cry
We talked about it all. The STD's with pictures. One my sisters and I childhood friends has AIDS and we spoke on that and STD's in great detail. Some of the girls are very open about having sex so their mom's have them on BC and we also stressed the importance of carrying condoms as it shouldn't solely be the other parties responsibility. My oldest sister made the best analogy: Sex is like driving on the road, not only do you have to drive for everybody else you have to drive for yourself. lmao. It was funny then.Confused
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote mzmee Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 07 2013 at 10:32am
Originally posted by tasty0619 tasty0619 wrote:

How is her relationship with her father? 

You don't have to answer but that may be the cause of her attention seeking behavior.
Her mom and dad are still married. From what I see on the outside he's very loving and caring with her. He calls the wife the queen and his daughter the princess. He doesn't know yet.Unhappy
 
I think that will break his heart.
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SamoneLenior View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (3) Thanks(3)   Quote SamoneLenior Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 07 2013 at 10:35am

he will be devastated
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (3) Thanks(3)   Quote EPITOME Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 07 2013 at 10:35am
damn teenage girl with involved parents still getting into mess? who is there hope for?
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (5) Thanks(5)   Quote sugabanana Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 07 2013 at 10:39am
My hypothetical daughter/s:

I would take her and all the other girls straight to the doctor for DEPO shots STAT!!!. I don't trust the pills and teenage girls forget to take them. We need her going to college and not standing in line for Similac. I'm not asking any questions because teenagers lie and cry at the same damn time.

My next move after the shot has been administered is to start talking. She may want to open up after a while if mom continues to probe. Mom has to be a friend at this point and not a mama.

Convo starts: Baby girl I know you gotta a boyfriend or someone your "talking to" (do they still use this term) I did in HS. Anyways I know you got a BF and I want us to have a relationship where we can be open. I'm always here for you. If you're having sex I need you to wrap it up. I don't care how good he looks, what he promises and how good he is. Wrap it up!! I need you focused and not out here trying to destroy your future getting pregnant. If you don't feel comfortable talking to me then go to aunty (TiTi) or one of your younger aunties and feel free to talk to them.

Mama should not absolutely NOT tell her that you saw the conversations on her phone. That will lbe the beginning of deleting text before coming home. HTH's
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (5) Thanks(5)   Quote Qualified Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 07 2013 at 10:42am
Sh!t!!! Thats a trifecta for yo ass. Chlamydia, The Herps, and an abortion... Im speechless. And Im sure your friend feels helpless. What do you do when you've done all you can and your child still goes awry??? It truly takes a village, and before this little girl becomes "Another Black Girl Lost," yall are going to have to pull together even stronger, and even tighter and see to it, that she realizes that she has people that truly love her. That you all (both the adults and the peers) want the best for her, and are not going to judge her but instead empower her with the understanding that she only has one body, and protecting it needs to be paramount. Its but for God's grace that she scathed away with Herpes and not AIDS (though I wouldnt want any of it)... I dont want her to develop thoughts that she's worthless because she has something incurable, so it important to keep that girl and her family lifted in prayer and hope for the best.
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