Black Hair Media Forum Homepage
BHM BHM BHM
Forum Home Forum Home > Lets Talk > Talk, Talk, and More Talk
  New Posts New Posts RSS Feed - Spotting and Shaking the Emotionally Needy People
  FAQ FAQ  Forum Search   Register Register  Login Login
 

Spotting and Shaking the Emotionally Needy People

 
 Post Reply Post Reply






Author
GG View Drop Down
Elite Member
Elite Member


Joined: Oct 14 2010
Location: New York
Status: Offline
Points: 29422
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote GG Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Topic: Spotting and Shaking the Emotionally Needy People
    Posted: Oct 29 2013 at 8:22am
Kay Whittenhauer
Sun November 25th, 2007

The emotionally needy, otherwise known as the walking wounded, are alive, although not well. If you're a people person you've surely run across them, and probably more than a few times.
How to spot the emotionally needy:

They lie. They will lie about anything, to anyone. It's their way of getting attention. It could be that they want to come across as more important and/or successful than they actually are, or to garner sympathy, or to create a bond. It really doesn't matter. They will lie about all things, big and small. It gets to a point where the listener is loathe to believe anything that comes out of their mouths.

They always to churn up some drama. That's their way of saying, "Look at me!", because, of course, that's how they become the center of attention. If there's nothing going on, they will make something up. This can be done by starting rumors, sticking their noses in where they don't belong, or "confiding" a suspicion that may or may not have any basis in fact. Another way to do this is to act inappropriately, and then talk about it for days on end.

They try to elbow their way into your life. They blatantly ask to be invited to a lunch date that you have, even though they've never met the other person. They have no problem telling you that they want to come to an event that they're clearly not a part of, like your son's Scout Banquet or your High School reunion. They ask for your parent's phone number, even though they've never met.

They continually bring up "trauma" from the past. It could be the normal growing up stuff that we all went through, or a difficult divorce last decade, but they have the need to tell you how troubled they are by it. They will re-play and re-tell the same story for years without ever making any effort to resolve their feelings toward the situation. The listener will always show concern the first couple of times, before realizing that it's yet another attention-getting ploy.

They assume an inappropriately close relationship too soon. They are, after all, very needy. Hence, they are looking for someone to take care of those needs. This is perhaps the most manipulative of their tools. If you show any signs of kindness, they will stick to you like white on rice. They will "open up" to you, trying to create and affirm a bond through the telling of their deepest darkest secrets.

How to shake the emotionally needy:

The emotionally needy are easy to spot, but very hard to shake. The best thing that you can do is exercise the utmost caution. If you are able to get out of the relationship- run! If you're tied to this person through family bonds- tread lightly. The best way to deal with them is to create an obvious and unmistakable distance, while avoiding confrontation. They will eventually accept that you don't have time for them. If they persist in looking to you to solve their emotional problems, let them know that you are not equipped to deal with anything on that level, and suggest professional help.

http://m.voices.yahoo.com/spotting-shaking-emotionally-needy-people-667265.html
Back to Top
Sponsored Links


Back to Top
nitabug View Drop Down
Elite Member
Elite Member


Joined: Sep 25 2008
Status: Offline
Points: 281191
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (2) Thanks(2)   Quote nitabug Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 29 2013 at 9:18am
This wasn't a good article, tbh
Back to Top
AwesomeAries View Drop Down
Elite Member
Elite Member
Avatar

Joined: Aug 25 2012
Status: Offline
Points: 82110
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote AwesomeAries Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 29 2013 at 9:24am
Originally posted by nitabug nitabug wrote:

This wasn't a good article, tbh

I agree, imho.
Back to Top
GG View Drop Down
Elite Member
Elite Member


Joined: Oct 14 2010
Location: New York
Status: Offline
Points: 29422
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote GG Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 29 2013 at 10:08am
Eh, I found it somewhat interesting although I don't really know how to deal with those ppl.
Back to Top
newdiva1 View Drop Down
Elite Member
Elite Member
Avatar

Joined: Dec 15 2006
Status: Offline
Points: 199349
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote newdiva1 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 29 2013 at 11:09am
What Nita n'nem said. No shade op.
Back to Top
FarraFace View Drop Down
Elite Member
Elite Member
Avatar

Joined: Jan 26 2011
Status: Offline
Points: 198558
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote FarraFace Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 29 2013 at 1:45pm
Sounds about right.
Back to Top
liesnalibis View Drop Down
VIP Member
VIP Member
Avatar

Joined: Nov 27 2012
Status: Offline
Points: 76067
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote liesnalibis Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 29 2013 at 11:29pm
LoL. It's useful as a what not to do in a new friendship.
Back to Top
Get Longer Healthier Faster Growing Hair
House of CB London
Get Healthier Stronger Longer Hair
The Elite Hair Care Sorority
Electric Cherry Hair
Hair Extensions Wefted Hair Wigs and More
Human Hair Wigs
Wefting Training
Dime Curves Enhancement Shake
Brazilian Hair
Brazilian Hair
Switch Up your Look with a protective Style
 Post Reply Post Reply
  Share Topic   

Forum Jump Forum Permissions View Drop Down