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Sinnamon_Mami View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: Sep 08 2013 at 6:47pm
I know you're scared but you have to be brave. My heart goes out to you. Do you work? If not, that's great because you don't have to put up with explaining to work, etc. etc. I just want you to know that YOU MATTER. I am not blaming  you because I truly understand and if I never suffered from it first hand, I probably wouldn't be so empathetic. Start over. Go to a shelter: Get on some kind of government aid, find work and keep going to counseling. I wish you the best and I'm proud of you for reaching out. Most women suffer in silence.. You are already brave because you are reaching out. I don't know you but I love you and you deserve better... Take care..
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creole booty View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: Sep 08 2013 at 6:55pm
I can't even imagine this. I kicked mine out for laziness. Took him back when he was done being lazy.

Here's the best advice about relationships that I ever got:

You have to b the kind of person, that the kind of Man U want, would want. U get it? If u want a good man, u have to b a good woman. If u want a strong man, u have to b a strong woman.

Now none of this is ur fault.

I have a relative who suffers from bpd. It basically emotionally attaches her to terrible men. Manipulative, evil men. She can't leave. It's like she's addicted. She's really smart, but her emotions ruin her. She got help and ironically enough my child's father is helping her move right now. I'm not sure if she's done for real this time, but we'll c. This is step 2. Step one was getting help for her condition.

I really think everyone here has given u great advice, and I hope u can get away safely.

U could try planting drugs on him and calling the police. That worked for one of my friends except he was an actual drug dealer.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: Sep 08 2013 at 7:00pm
Never mind she's still with him. We're doing this for no reason at all. I swear I typed my response, got out of the car, and this nicca offered to buy her thirsty ass a pizza and give her weed and she's back on his dick. Never mind.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: Sep 08 2013 at 7:30pm
OP I wish I could just hug you.

He is not your support. He is your abuser. For the sake of you and your child (your true supporter) get out before it's too late and is left with no one in this world. I wish you the best, you deserve better, it doesn't have to be this way.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: Sep 08 2013 at 7:31pm
that poor child.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: Sep 08 2013 at 7:40pm
And indiecat, you will never be able to change him. Only he can.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: Sep 08 2013 at 7:43pm
You're not ready.

I was in a physically, emotionally, & mentally abusive relationship with my kids father for 7 years. The cycle of "beating-your-ass-and apologizing" kept happening til *I* got tired of it. I didn't matter what someone told me if that relationship wasn't healthy not only for me but my young kids at the time.
Truth is....

WHAT YOU ALLOW WILL CONTINUE.

When that time DID finally come, I was on public aid getting about $325 a month. I took my last check, packed up my kids and I things, hopped on a Greyhound and moved out of state. Ever since then, our lives have been flourishing! I'm glad I had the courage to walk away while my kids were 5 & 6 years old and not have them raised in that mess. And they are thankful to ME because I loved them enough to think about THEM first! Today, my kids are getting ready to start college and I'm getting ready to start my own business.

So, unless he's physically chaining you or holding you hostage in a basement I see no reason whatsoever why you can't leave....unless you don't really want to. Period.


Edited by Az~Maverick - Sep 08 2013 at 7:45pm
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: Sep 08 2013 at 7:47pm
Originally posted by creole booty creole booty wrote:

U could try planting drugs on him and calling the police. That worked for one of my friends except he was an actual drug dealer.
See, I told a friend to do this with the guy who put hands on her (he was on probation for selling drugs) but she still wanted to mess with him.

Another friend was in an abusive relationship and finally left him but had to stay in the state during the BS court battle over their kids. Since the abusive father signed his name on the birth certificate and they had his last name, she couldn't leave the state with her kids...even though he was a scummy father to his kids, paid no child support and wanted nothing to do with them.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: Sep 08 2013 at 7:48pm
Originally posted by tropical-punch tropical-punch wrote:

that poor child.


Right. where is OP's family?

Anybody? cousin, mother, aunt, sister, granny somebody?

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Direct Link To This Post Posted: Sep 08 2013 at 7:50pm
You have a duty to your daughter to leave.
I feel bad for you but I feel worse for your daughter .


Are you thinking about her and what stay will potentially do to her?
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