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So I Guess I'm Screwed Now...

 
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qheenkitty View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (2) Thanks(2)   Quote qheenkitty Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 16 2017 at 10:52am
Its tough.... you have all of us who are basically banging our heads against our computer screens right now but guys I think that she just doesn't get it. Shes one of those people that will have to be put through hell before she finally gets the hint. Too bad for her its already been 10 years and it will probably be another 10 yeas with no marriage (although hes already said that he is not marrying her) and a cheating scandal before she FINALLY gets the hint that its over. Next he will actually bring another girl there and as stupid as the OP has been, I think she would still try to "salvage" the relationship still thereafter. There is nothing to salvage and yet shes still trying to salvage a relationship where she knows that shes "convenient coochie", hes not going to marry her and is asking her to move out. This is beyond being young and dumb and theres nothing we can say to sway her otherwise. Theres been plenty of wisdom given about this situation and theres only a slew of excuses behind every word of advice here.

The family isn't a meal ticket. Theres been AMPLE time to find a room to rent. Ppl do it all the time in high priced cities/areas because rent is beyond expensive in said locations. STUDENTS DO THIS ALL THE TIME as well. Most students don't have full time jobs but work part time just like yourself to barely cover their expenses and they rent rooms/apt together to split those costs. YOU JUST DON'T WANT TO LEAVE because you know that in moving out, you'll be walking away from the relationship in a sense. You know he won't call you anymore, he won't see you anymore and that things will basically be over with if you move out.. you'll just be grasping at straws at any chance of being with him. You know that while you are still there, he has no choice but to be with you in this awkward song and dance that you all are doing. You don't want to lose small piece of a man because you have no self esteem. He knows that hence the reason why he continues to be so callous in hopes that you will actually leave so that he can move on with his life.
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4BFabulousity View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote 4BFabulousity Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 17 2017 at 8:59am
Originally posted by qheenkitty qheenkitty wrote:

Its tough.... you have all of us who are basically banging our heads against our computer screens right now but guys I think that she just doesn't get it. Shes one of those people that will have to be put through hell before she finally gets the hint. Too bad for her its already been 10 years and it will probably be another 10 yeas with no marriage (although hes already said that he is not marrying her) and a cheating scandal before she FINALLY gets the hint that its over. Next he will actually bring another girl there and as stupid as the OP has been, I think she would still try to "salvage" the relationship still thereafter. There is nothing to salvage and yet shes still trying to salvage a relationship where she knows that shes "convenient coochie", hes not going to marry her and is asking her to move out. This is beyond being young and dumb and theres nothing we can say to sway her otherwise. Theres been plenty of wisdom given about this situation and theres only a slew of excuses behind every word of advice here.

The family isn't a meal ticket. Theres been AMPLE time to find a room to rent. Ppl do it all the time in high priced cities/areas because rent is beyond expensive in said locations. STUDENTS DO THIS ALL THE TIME as well. Most students don't have full time jobs but work part time just like yourself to barely cover their expenses and they rent rooms/apt together to split those costs. YOU JUST DON'T WANT TO LEAVE because you know that in moving out, you'll be walking away from the relationship in a sense. You know he won't call you anymore, he won't see you anymore and that things will basically be over with if you move out.. you'll just be grasping at straws at any chance of being with him. You know that while you are still there, he has no choice but to be with you in this awkward song and dance that you all are doing. You don't want to lose small piece of a man because you have no self esteem. He knows that hence the reason why he continues to be so callous in hopes that you will actually leave so that he can move on with his life.


I know how renting a room out works, I have done it before. And that's what I think I may have to do. I try really hard to find work so I can move out because I realize he does not really want to be with me and we are only still together because I live there. I thought that I could make it work with this man because we have so much history together. But like I said before, I'm now only still at the house do to money issues. If I made more money I would have left a long time ago. And I definitely do have self esteem but being that I have a place to live because of him I have to watch what I say. Like the old saying goes, don't bite out of the hand that feeds you. Everyone that has posted in this thread has made valid points. I'm pretty sure once I move out it will be completely over. He says the what he is trying to do is save for a house and he mentions nothing about me living there with him. The only thing that bothers me at this point is that I wish he would just tell me straight up that he just wants to move on. Don't drop hints, just say the s*it. I really don't see things lasting too much longer.
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sexyandfamous View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote sexyandfamous Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 17 2017 at 3:20pm
Originally posted by 4BFabulousity 4BFabulousity wrote:

The only thing that bothers me at this point is that I wish he would just tell me straight up that he just wants to move on. Don't drop hints, just say the s*it. I really don't see things lasting too much longer.





He knows you wouldn't get it even if he straight up said it to you.

You are still on the "i don't see us lasting any longer" bvllsh*t. You are going to be heartbroken after you finally get out of there and 2 days later you hear about his "new" girl.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote 4BFabulousity Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 17 2017 at 6:00pm
Originally posted by sexyandfamous sexyandfamous wrote:

Originally posted by 4BFabulousity 4BFabulousity wrote:

The only thing that bothers me at this point is that I wish he would just tell me straight up that he just wants to move on. Don't drop hints, just say the s*it. I really don't see things lasting too much longer.





He knows you wouldn't get it even if he straight up said it to you.

You are still on the "i don't see us lasting any longer" bvllsh*t. You are going to be heartbroken after you finally get out of there and 2 days later you hear about his "new" girl.


All I have to say about this is, if he is messing with someone else he's doing a good job at hiding it.


Edited by 4BFabulousity - Feb 17 2017 at 6:01pm
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creole booty View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote creole booty Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 27 2017 at 11:03pm
Yeah they can be pretty good at hiding it. Til u look in their phone one day and u see a "hey bae" text, then u quickly say we have to leave my moms house and then U curse him out on the 45 min car ride home. Then he tells u he's been chicks on his lunch break in the bathroom at Marshall fields. But for 3 years u swore he wasn't cheating because he didn't show any signs.

I really dont know why I stayed with him and then had a child with him and stayed with him even longer. I mean I was clearly stupid, but for real I don't know why.
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creole booty View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote creole booty Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 27 2017 at 11:06pm
And I have more and worse stories about his sneaky ass. By the end he saw my dumb ass wasn't going anywhere so he wasn't even bothering to b good at hiding it anymore.

Ask some older females about how they've caught men cheating. It's been this way since bc times with men like ur basement buddy.

(No shade to u, u seem nice. I just hate men that live in their family basement.)
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4BFabulousity View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote 4BFabulousity Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 01 2017 at 7:32am
Originally posted by creole booty creole booty wrote:

And I have more and worse stories about his sneaky ass. By the end he saw my dumb ass wasn't going anywhere so he wasn't even bothering to b good at hiding it anymore.

Ask some older females about how they've caught men cheating. It's been this way since bc times with men like ur basement buddy.

(No shade to u, u seem nice. I just hate men that live in their family basement.)


Our room is upstairs not in the basement. Just saying, and I find it really sad when people cheat when they have a partner that is faithful and treats them well. If you are unhappy with someone just leave.
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creole booty View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote creole booty Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 15 2017 at 12:44pm
Yeah that's what u should do lol. I'm engaged to a new guy already, much much much better life. Like exponentially better, but if he *&%^$#@Es up I'll leave him too in a heartbeat. That ratchet relationship one foot in one foot out sh*t is old and wack.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote 4BFabulousity Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 24 2017 at 4:36pm
Originally posted by creole booty creole booty wrote:

Yeah that's what u should do lol. I'm engaged to a new guy already, much much much better life. Like exponentially better, but if he *&%^$#@Es up I'll leave him too in a heartbeat. That ratchet relationship one foot in one foot out sh*t is old and wack.


I hear you, but as of late things have been going much, much better. There hasn't been any recent talk about be having to leave. But on another note I am still trying to save up and find work so I can finally have my independence.
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