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Should you Snoop on Your Man?

 
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uppitynegroid View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (3) Thanks(3)   Quote uppitynegroid Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 12 2014 at 9:30pm
There is a clear line between perpetual snooping and isolated snooping.  Obviously if snooping is a normal part of your relationship, that can't be good.  However, if you're with a guy, suspect something, look for it, confront him, and leave...well how can that possibly be a negative thing?
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BeatriceBean View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (8) Thanks(8)   Quote BeatriceBean Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 12 2014 at 9:31pm
I totally condone snooping if you are married and intend to divorce or would need to prove anything to the police or in a court of law. Otherwise, I believe that women need to communicate our concerns as well as learn to trust our instincts and walk away.
The process of snooping can drive you crazy. If you find something and stay, then you're continuously restarting a cycle of distrust and dysfunction...two automatic adversaries of a healthy relationship. You will keep snooping and can never have any peace in your relationship. If you snoop and find nothing, but do not trust him, then you will keep snooping until you do.
 
Life and love don't have to be like this.
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Mz. Mocha View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote Mz. Mocha Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 12 2014 at 9:35pm
Nope. If you look for something you just might not like what you find.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote **Sk!TtLeS B** Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 12 2014 at 9:42pm
Originally posted by maysay1 maysay1 wrote:

Trust, but verify.

I see no reason to snoop, I just ask. If you're telling the truth then the record will show that. If you're not telling the truth, either there will be no record, there will be excuses, or there will be deflection.

I'm certainly not going to snoop on a grown person who I can just talk to and get the answers I need.

^^^^^^^^^

If I'm feeling insecure about the status of my relationship, running around tryna dig up some dirt is not going to make me feel better. I'm an adult, and if I cant have a conversation with another adult about concerns I'm having with the relationship we have together, fck snooping, it's time for me to bounce anyway. 
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (3) Thanks(3)   Quote Senior Detective Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 12 2014 at 9:54pm
Originally posted by Mz. Mocha Mz. Mocha wrote:

Nope. If you look for something you just might not like what you find.
so if u were in cocos shoes, u woulda caught the genital warts cuz u wouldn't like what u found
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote india100 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 12 2014 at 10:27pm

I snoop when i first start dating my hubby . We fell in love and married after only dating for a short time . I am talking months lol . 30 years later i know him like the back of my hand . I agree with Beatrice also .

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eanaj5 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote eanaj5 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 12 2014 at 10:30pm
Ms. india, whats that old school snooping like?
I imagine it was much more difficult then, yes?
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (8) Thanks(8)   Quote india100 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 12 2014 at 10:46pm
Originally posted by eanaj5 eanaj5 wrote:

Ms. india, whats that old school snooping like?
I imagine it was much more difficult then, yes?
lol . The cell phone was the size of a small flat screen . I use to wait until he fell out after partying with his best friends and check the big old thick black wallet for numbers . I found one which was his sister that i never met . LOL I will share more if we have a topic on the best way to snoop lol . My husband use to talk in his sleep . I found out he was in love with Chaka Khan . AngryLOLCry

Edited by india100 - Jan 12 2014 at 10:52pm
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eanaj5 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote eanaj5 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 12 2014 at 10:48pm
LOL
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Ds2nice Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 12 2014 at 10:57pm
Once you find someone that you trust and you know is your ride-a-die nig, you won't feel the need to check or snoop.

Once you get that feeling that you have to check his or her phone, the relationship is going down a steep hill.
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