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Should Weight Be a Dealbreaker?

 
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Senior Detective View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Senior Detective Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 07 2014 at 8:53am
Originally posted by Princess Grace Princess Grace wrote:

Originally posted by Senior Detective Senior Detective wrote:

Prior to her being the size she is now we all went to Vegas and he said lets do it, she was like nooo I want my family at my wedding and blah blah blah
=============

dumb decision
eloping>>>>>>>>>

We just went on some hangout type situation, she now says she didnt 't like this about him and that about him so who really knows what the real deal is/was. I think they both just got comfortable, had been dating since high school, then the baby and just stayed together. Hell they got along better than me and my husband , I thought they were pretty happy. Then one day we were at home having drinks and she said they were not having sex, and I sat there looking like my AVI.

I dont like knowing other peoples mess. CryCryCryCry
didn't like what?  his spontaneity?
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sugabanana View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (4) Thanks(4)   Quote sugabanana Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 07 2014 at 9:32am
Man she missed out on her wedding/marriage opportunity. She should've said yes at that time and had a wedding later while riding hard on that Nordic track. I feel bad for her...really I do but this is something she had control on and it was in her hands and power to do so. I guess the guy just got tired and thought she would get even bigger.

Princess is right she really needed to work on herself 1st. She sounds depressed.

If I were her I would pick my big self up and hit the gym, weights and everything and hope and pray I run into my ex and he sees the new me in my size 36-25-40. How can you be with someone for 13 years and not be married? I no understand mami. I guess its a culture thing cos Nigerians I know are not engaged for more than a year. Anything after that year people would tease you and say you're the cow he got for free.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote newdiva1 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 07 2014 at 9:42am
She nigerian?  And the 'rents let the non-marriage go on for that long?
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote Jewelsnyc Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 07 2014 at 9:43am
Originally posted by sugabanana sugabanana wrote:

Man she missed out on her wedding/marriage opportunity. She should've said yes at that time and had a wedding later while riding hard on that Nordic track. I feel bad for her...really I do but this is something she had control on and it was in her hands and power to do so. I guess the guy just got tired and thought she would get even bigger.

Princess is right she really needed to work on herself 1st. She sounds depressed.

If I were her I would pick my big self up and hit the gym, weights and everything and hope and pray I run into my ex and he sees the new me in my size 36-25-40. How can you be with someone for 13 years and not be married? I no understand mami. I guess its a culture thing cos Nigerians I know are not engaged for more than a year. Anything after that year people would tease you and say you're the cow he got for free.
literally....LOL
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (3) Thanks(3)   Quote Princess Grace Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 07 2014 at 9:45am
Originally posted by Senior Detective Senior Detective wrote:

Originally posted by Princess Grace Princess Grace wrote:

Originally posted by Senior Detective Senior Detective wrote:

Prior to her being the size she is now we all went to Vegas and he said lets do it, she was like nooo I want my family at my wedding and blah blah blah
=============

dumb decision
eloping>>>>>>>>>

We just went on some hangout type situation, she now says she didnt 't like this about him and that about him so who really knows what the real deal is/was. I think they both just got comfortable, had been dating since high school, then the baby and just stayed together. Hell they got along better than me and my husband , I thought they were pretty happy. Then one day we were at home having drinks and she said they were not having sex, and I sat there looking like my AVI.

I dont like knowing other peoples mess. CryCryCryCry
didn't like what?  his spontaneity?

She complained about his mother, and a bunch of other foolery that doesnt really matter if you guys really want to be together.  

Grace is NOT nosy, I have my own crazy life to deal with, dealing with my moms heath issues, getting my son to football practice, my job, my hair, my fitness, taking care of my sisters kids. I never ask peoples personal issues cause I really don't want to be involved and I have learned that people ask but they don't really want to know your opinion and they will do it their way even when it clearly isnt working.

I am no fitness expert but I do know that you have to put in some effort. If you are NOT willing to do anything then you will have the same results. She asks, I offer. I just look at it like those two were not meant to be.  If you felt like doing some jumping jacks would save your relationship and you dont do any you dont care about being in that relationship anyway so you guys should break up.



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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (2) Thanks(2)   Quote pebbles251 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 07 2014 at 9:45am
LMAO at this thread. I cant.....yea she wrong for not upkeeping her body. Some people get too comfy when in a relationship. I had a chit chat with a newly engaged couple last week at dinner about the same thing...I was trying to tell her not to get too comfy wearing her grandma night clothes to bed every night.
Then low and behold her fiance jumped in and said " I hate that overall thing she wears to bed every night". I asked if there was at least a hole in the crotch and he said no...I took one look and her and shook my head.
Yup he put a ring on it so she feels no need to dress sexy or at least give him some easy access to the pum pum.
 
I am not saying she should be in a fly away/ baby doll every night but good lord please throw away the
rabbit jumpsuit and grandma night gowns.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote Printer_Ink Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 07 2014 at 9:51am
Originally posted by ms_wonderland ms_wonderland wrote:

i'm all about being honest during conversations like this so i don't fault you for that buttttttt it does kinda seem like you're gloating...as if maybe she was the hot one of the group before she gained all the weight.


That's how it sounds to me too .. like she's kind of happy her friend .. got fat. :(

What's that new term? 'frienimies'?
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (2) Thanks(2)   Quote GG Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 07 2014 at 9:54am
That's the trick, some only work hard to get the ring then it's "Gotcha Bitch!" and they'll never be the same sexy person you once fell for ever again...

Edited by GG - Jan 07 2014 at 9:54am
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote sugabanana Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 07 2014 at 9:59am
Originally posted by pebbles251 pebbles251 wrote:

LMAO at this thread. I cant.....yea she wrong for not upkeeping her body. Some people get too comfy when in a relationship. I had a chit chat with a newly engaged couple last week at dinner about the same thing...I was trying to tell her not to get too comfy wearing her grandma night clothes to bed every night.
Then low and behold her fiance jumped in and said " I hate that overall thing she wears to bed every night". I asked if there was at least a hole in the crotch and he said no...I took one look and her and shook my head.
Yup he put a ring on it so she feels no need to dress sexy or at least give him some easy access to the pum pum.
 
I am not saying she should be in a fly away/ baby doll every night but good lord please throw away the
rabbit jumpsuit and grandma night gowns.


Pebbles Those jammies are super comfortable. My hubby hates those things too. I hate the silky stuff. Slipping and sliding all up in the bed tryna reach the damn pillow. No Ma'am. Special occasions only!!!
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote Tbaby Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 07 2014 at 10:00am
Well they share a 13 y/o so she still basically has him in her life possibly til the kid legally becomes an adult.

She prolly is an emotional eater and sees food as comforting.  She might do really well joining weight watchers since they have great support groups.  And join a gym and go regularly to a class if she can't afford a trainer.

I'm married going on 14 years and really think it wasn't just her weight that broke them apart.  That's most likely the tip of the iceburg...now the guy is engaged so really think there's little chance for them to get back together.

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