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Derri 
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 Posted: Jan 28 2013 at 4:51pm |
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Where I live, young white women get hired in every and any position because they are white, whether they are qualified or not. Where I live, whites help whites because whites want to keep their business white. Indians help Indians because they want to keep their business Indian.
Black don't help blacks, there are no black businesses other than the Caribbean restaurants and shops, and blacks jump from entry level to entry level, from company to company to do the same job for their whole careers. Always looking over their shoulders, and generally feel threatened that their position could be taken from them over silly things, and guess who they fill the position with instead?
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Limalady
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Posted: Jan 28 2013 at 4:54pm |
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Many Black people I know feel like, "I made it on my own. You should make it on your own." I email one lawyer friend just to talk, not even wanting anything but encouragement, and she steady ignores me. I swore to myself that I'd never be like that when I make it.
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BeatriceBean
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Posted: Jan 28 2013 at 4:58pm |
 EPITOME wrote:
i have had many black women tell me that other black women are law firms are the ones you need to watch out for. i was surprised and saddened. |
Both of my sisters are attorneys and both of them have said the same thing. My oldest sister only started mentoring other black female attorneys when she became a judge -___-
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Limalady
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Posted: Jan 28 2013 at 5:03pm |
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That is crazy to me. I think our people are just paranoid.
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Derri
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Posted: Jan 28 2013 at 5:04pm |
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I'll be honest, black women give me hell! Some of my work mates have even tried to harm me on the sly.
When we travel to the Caribbean, we pray we don't get female customs officers because they're straight up bitches to other attractive black women! Even the damn gorgeous flight attendants act weird when other beautiful women fly.
It's not just black women competing with each other, I know Asian women are bitches to each other, and white women...well they're bitches period!
But naw, I don't trust black women in the workplace. Nor white ones for obvious reasons.
When I meet a pleasant black woman at work, I'm often relieved and comforted.
Edited by Derri - Jan 28 2013 at 5:06pm
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maysay1
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Posted: Jan 28 2013 at 5:05pm |
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On the subject of black people not being able to receive help...
I think those of us who want to help really have to evaluate the words, tone, and shape of what that help looks like. I think most of the time it comes off as condescending and patronizing because it seems to follow the structure of "let me point out your dysfunction (because I know better) and teach you how to fix it".
No matter how well meaning, starting from a place of focusing on the dysfunction will always make the help giver appear to have a superiority complex and make the help receiver feel humiliated, embarrassed, and ashamed and therefore not open to receiving the help.
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babycakebabe
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Posted: Jan 28 2013 at 5:11pm |
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Good thread. Very complex topic.
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ImThatDiva
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Posted: Jan 28 2013 at 5:17pm |
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It's a two way street as cliché as that sounds. I don't like when some black people think you should just give them help because they are black. Some black people act as though you owe them something. I don't owe anyone but my parents anything. That's not what I'm here for. You have to do for yourself too. Don't expect me to pave the whole way for you. If you're not trying to get there yourself, I won't help you.
Basically, I'm not going a foot out of my way to help someone who isn't trying to help themselves but I'll go a mile out of my way to help someone who is trying themselves.
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Derri
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Posted: Jan 28 2013 at 5:21pm |
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Yep, I don't help any and every person just cause they're black.
My heart really wants to, but I wasn't born yesterday. I know human nature, and I have common sense.
Some black people ain't sh*t, and will never be sh*t. and there are many reasons why.
But some black people might have had a rough start, messed up because of that, and want better, but no one is giving them the chance. I wish there were more of us in positions where we could employ our own, because we do understand the 'black issues' that hold us back. We could relate.
Edited by Derri - Jan 28 2013 at 5:29pm
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jonesable
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Posted: Jan 28 2013 at 5:24pm |
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Yes yes yes.
There are a lot of folk back home who do this and I love them for it.
When they see us trying they give us that extra push and have positions for us back home
Edited by jonesable - Jan 28 2013 at 5:26pm
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