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*Belle*Femme* 
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 Posted: Feb 01 2013 at 9:37pm |
 Miss SDY wrote:
goodm3 wrote:
Miss SDY wrote:
My parents strongly disapproved of me or my siblings shacking up.
I do not have a problem with it myself but it would have to be with the plan to get married in the near future.
I know two couples in which the ladies are very near and dear to my heart. I consider them my sisters, even though one is an actual relative. One is pregnant and the other one just had her baby a week ago yesterday. They live with the fathers of their babies. The one that just had her baby has been with the father for almost 9 years and have lived together for 4 years. The other one that is currently pregnant has been with the father for 7 years and they have lived together 3 years. As much as I listen to them talk about wanting and ready to be married, I do not understand why neither of them have approached the subject with them..
Me personally, from the point where I move in, I need an engagement ring on my hand and a date set in stone. I am not exceeding 1.5 years from that point co-habitating with a man without a name change and a wedding band in addition to my engagement ring. I am just not going to do it. Period. The only way is if something unexpected happens because we all know life throws us punches.
Anything past that point, I may have to re-evaluate the relationship/engagement.. People get comfortable sometimes and do not have the desire or the want to go through with it when they live together.. When I make that move to unite under one roof, I am doing it with the sole intent to get married, not co-habitate for 10 years... |
If a dude has been with you for 9 years and yall have kids together...and has NOT married you. its clear, he doesn't want to be married to her. |
You are very much so correct on that. |
well how long was tiny engaged for? They got married
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miana79
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Posted: Feb 01 2013 at 11:07pm |
ms_wonderland wrote:
i'm really fond of the idea of living with someone but having my own bedroom. is that weird? |
VERY WEIRD!
so when u have sex, u gonna just send the person to their room after??? will the persom be allowed to have stuff in ur room???? this is sooo funny!
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ms_wonderland
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Posted: Feb 01 2013 at 11:13pm |
miana79 wrote:
ms_wonderland wrote:
i'm really fond of the idea of living with someone but having my own bedroom. is that weird? |
VERY WEIRD!
so when u have sex, u gonna just send the person to their room after??? will the persom be allowed to have stuff in ur room???? this is sooo funny! |
lol i really didn't say that to be funny b/c i am serious. i think it's the best of both worlds. doesn't everyone want to be alone sometimes? he can have some things in my room and vice versa...sometimes he can sleep over in my room, sometimes i'll sleep over in his room. it may be because my sleeping patterns change a lot and i want the freedom to chill in bed and listen to music or watch tv or whatever, whenever i want without upsetting his sleep. it might make sex and stuff more exciting too. 
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miana79
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Posted: Feb 01 2013 at 11:20pm |
ms_wonderland wrote:
miana79 wrote:
ms_wonderland wrote:
i'm really fond of the idea of living with someone but having my own bedroom. is that weird? |
VERY WEIRD!
so when u have sex, u gonna just send the person to their room after??? will the persom be allowed to have stuff in ur room???? this is sooo funny! |
lol i really didn't say that to be funny b/c i am serious. i think it's the best of both worlds. doesn't everyone want to be alone sometimes? he can have some things in my room and vice versa...sometimes he can sleep over in my room, sometimes i'll sleep over in his room. it may be because my sleeping patterns change a lot and i want the freedom to chill in bed and listen to music or watch tv or whatever, whenever i want without upsetting his sleep. it might make sex and stuff more exciting too. |
lol....then why live together  why not just visit each other couple times a week? that would be even more exciting. 
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maysay1
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Posted: Feb 01 2013 at 11:23pm |
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Wonderland, my bio mom and her husband have never shared a bedroom. Before they got married they lived in a duplex for like 5 years, each had their own apartment. Now they have a 3 bedroom house, each has their own room and bathroom. They love it that way.
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ms_wonderland
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Posted: Feb 01 2013 at 11:24pm |
because then we would be paying separate rent. that would be a waste of money! oh well, no one will agree to this anyway. 
eta: nvm...it is possible...Maysay...do they seem happy and affectionate?
Edited by ms_wonderland - Feb 01 2013 at 11:24pm
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maysay1
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Posted: Feb 01 2013 at 11:28pm |
ms_wonderland wrote:
because then we would be paying separate rent. that would be a waste of money! oh well, no one will agree to this anyway.
eta: nvm...it is possible...Maysay...do they seem happy and affectionate? |
They've been together over a decade and are happy as clams. My mom said it's great for both of them and they actually spend a lot of time together as well. But having their own spaces means they don't have a lot of issues other couples have. Plus, she says they both sleep well.
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ms_wonderland
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Posted: Feb 01 2013 at 11:37pm |
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that sounds like Heaven. they must both be really secure. i don't think a younger guy would be down for this. he would think i'm off texting other guys or something. i wouldn't want this arrangement forever but for the next couple yrs it would be nice.
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CLCNY20
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Posted: Feb 01 2013 at 11:39pm |
I know a guy in his early forties who met a girl in her early-to-mid twenties this last November. After two weeks of dating, they went away on a two week trip together. When they came back, she moved in with him. I, personally, think she's either a gold-digger or just a chick with low self-esteem and absolutely no goals/ambitions/aims in life. In either event, she comes off as a whore, and him as a desperate, pathetic 'tard going through some type of mid-life crisis. I don't move in with people. Point blank. We need to be dating seriously for like a year before I'll even consider it. Even then, I'd like to see an engagement ring (which I won't feel comfortable getting any less than a-year-and-a-half), so I wouldn't be living with dude until at least almost 2 years into the relationship. Then again, these lil bishes are fast nowadays, and have no clue what love is; they are also hella-insecure, and believe if they let they "boo" out of their site for 2 seconds, he'll cheat on them, so that's why they're so quick to move in. On the guy's side, I think they're also insecure, and want to move their girls in to keep tabs on her and her activities.
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Prtybrwneye_z
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Posted: Feb 01 2013 at 11:42pm |
dreamz wrote:
I know a hetero couple that have lived together for 22 years.
I judge them, even though i know i shouldnt. |
^this, I know it works for some but it's not for me. I know folks who have been together for over 20 years, with teenage children and paying a mortgage. If ya can sign that deed you can sign a marriage certificate cuz they are both long term commitments.
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