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alynxx View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote alynxx Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 23 2014 at 8:48am
It is too hard to prove but I understand that feeling. You have to be brave though and say no audibly because I don't think a "feeling" would stand up in court.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (3) Thanks(3)   Quote SoutherNtellect Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 23 2014 at 9:03am
saying no barely stands up in court 

he say she say
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (4) Thanks(4)   Quote liesnalibis Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 23 2014 at 9:09am
Originally posted by jonesable jonesable wrote:

The op doesn't have enough info to say its rape.

She's scared that doesn't mean there has been action taken or he has done or said something.
Was there an implied threat ..anything ?

There has to be something


I don't think you're considering all possibilities honestly. What if it gets hot and heavy in the bedroom and if he makes it known that's what he wants and he leverages enough force (hand wrapped around her arm or otherwise preventing her movement) and tells her things like "shh" or "come on baby" and she sees his heart's set on it she may give in so it won't turn ugly. It's still not right though.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote LovesHim Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 23 2014 at 10:29am
I'm sure it happens often 
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote jonesable Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 23 2014 at 10:31am
see those are acts..thats something.
 
but none of that was said in the op.
just s feeling.
 
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote melikey Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 23 2014 at 10:35am
I have had pity sex but never had sex because I was scared.
In both situations there was an outside influence but somehow they are different in my head. I guess the perception of the person's potential for violence being present or absent makes it different I dunno.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote JoliePoufiasse Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 23 2014 at 10:48am
Originally posted by alynxx alynxx wrote:

It is too hard to prove but I understand that feeling. You have to be brave though and say no audibly because I don't think a "feeling" would stand up in court.


This. I understand that feeling too and your gut is usually right. But to prove coercion in a situation like this in a court of law is next to impossible. I haven't felt scared of rape per say but I have felt scared that a man I was seeing had the potential of becoming violent even though he hadn't done anything physical yet and I was head over heels in every other aspect.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (5) Thanks(5)   Quote afrokock Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 23 2014 at 10:55am
i always say people should pay more attention to their gut instinct even if you can never quantify it
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote liesnalibis Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 23 2014 at 11:11am
It's weird because I was just thinking about this the other day. A scene in a movie that made me wonder about this. If you know you can't fight or get away and believe it's inevitable you may give in even though he hasn't physically forced you or said he will. 

Actually there were two scenes like that in the movie. It was Original Sin. I'd call it an implied threat or implied force.


Edited by liesnalibis - Feb 23 2014 at 11:13am
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote liesnalibis Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 23 2014 at 11:20am
ugh BHM is annoying...

Edited by liesnalibis - Feb 23 2014 at 11:21am
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