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QUOTES, QUOTES,QUOTES

 
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Benni Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jun 26 2014 at 2:32pm
Q: "How do you shoot a killer bee?"





A: "With a bee bee gun."
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Benni Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jun 26 2014 at 2:38pm
Q. How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light bulb?





A. One, but it takes five sessions.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Benni Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jun 28 2014 at 12:07am
Q. What did the elephant say to a naked man?





A. Hey that's cute but can you breath through it?
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Benni Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jun 28 2014 at 12:10am
Q: What did One gay sperm say to another?





A: How do we find an egg in all of this sh*t?
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Benni Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jun 28 2014 at 12:13am
The fly that doesn't want to be swatted is most secure when it lights on the fly-swatter.


~G.C. Lichtenberg
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Benni Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jun 28 2014 at 12:16am
"Though we may know Him by a thousand names,
He is one and the same to us all."




Mahatma Gandhi

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Benni Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jun 28 2014 at 12:21am
I know how to learn anything I want to learn.
I absolutely know that I could learn how to fly the space shuttle because someone else knows how to fly it, and they put it in a book.
Give me the book, and I do not need somebody to stand up in front of the class."



Will Smith

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Benni Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jun 28 2014 at 12:25am
"Nothing would be more tiresome than eating and drinking
if God had not made them a pleasure as well as a necessity."




Voltaire

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Benni Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jun 28 2014 at 12:29am
Q: What's the first bet that most people make in their lives?





A: The alpha bet
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Benni Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jun 28 2014 at 12:31am
Q: Did you hear about the new movie "Constipation?"





A: It hasn't come out yet.
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