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Are these stalker tendencies?

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Printed Date: Dec 13 2018 at 2:11pm


Topic: Are these stalker tendencies?
Posted By: callmeDEva
Subject: Are these stalker tendencies?
Date Posted: Sep 04 2014 at 1:01pm
Say you met someone. In real life or online (after verifying they're not a catfish) you've only chatted a few times but it's pretty platonic at the moment.

They're from your area and there's an event going on where you know they'll be at. You make plans to go with the sole intention of "accidentally" running into them.



I'm trying to tell my friend she's being a little weird. My other friend thinks there's nothing wrong with it.



Replies:
Posted By: Gkisses
Date Posted: Sep 04 2014 at 1:05pm
Why not just ask him to go with her. Seems like shes trying not appear "thirsty" by acting undeniably in need of hydration.


Posted By: creole booty
Date Posted: Sep 04 2014 at 1:07pm
It's an even that anyone can go to? That's not that bad. I wouldn't admit I did that until I knew they really REALLY liked me though.

Some things r only ok when u like the person. When u don't like them, everything they do annoys u or is negative.


Posted By: thewonderfulwa
Date Posted: Sep 04 2014 at 1:11pm
So she wouldnt be going to the event if the guy wouldnt be there sounds stalkerish to me.
I hope she doesnt see anything to break her po lil' heart.


Posted By: SoutherNtellect
Date Posted: Sep 04 2014 at 1:40pm
easy way for her to get ghost if he isn't what she expected


Posted By: Yardgirl
Date Posted: Sep 04 2014 at 1:44pm
I don't think there's anything wrong with it really. You could go with her!


Posted By: alynxx
Date Posted: Sep 04 2014 at 2:12pm
[QUOTE=Gkisses]Why not just ask him to go with her. Seems like shes trying not appear "thirsty" by acting undeniably in need of hydration.[/QUOTE]

Big smileLOL



Posted By: Miss B
Date Posted: Sep 04 2014 at 2:14pm
Depends.....

How did she find out he was going? Did he tell her he was going and mentioned details (1 pt), just so happen to see a flyer on her newsfeed with him commenting that he's going (2 pts), did he vaguely mention it and she googled to fill in the details (3 pts) specifically go to his confirmed FB events (4 pts), or take a peep at his phone/email calendar (7 pts), have someone to hack into his accounts (50 pts)?

Was she also invited to the event? If she wasn't invited at all and only heard about it when she discovered he was going....10 pts. If she passively heard it (FB, instagram, flyer on car, lol) at least one other place before she found out he was going and decided to to, 5 pts. If she was personally invited by someone attending, 1 pt)

Did they already meet in person? (1 pt) or have they only communicated on-line up to this point? (5pts)

I think anything over 8 is somewhat stalkerish. Anything over 16 means you might need to keep a special eye on her.

With that said, I'm all for research. But I'd need more details to formulate a less stalkery yet still effective approach.


Posted By: callmeDEva
Date Posted: Sep 04 2014 at 2:23pm
these responses are funny


Posted By: callmeDEva
Date Posted: Sep 04 2014 at 2:25pm
Originally posted by Gkisses Gkisses wrote:

Why not just ask him to go with her. Seems like shes trying not appear "thirsty" by acting undeniably in need of hydration.


Yeah she's thirsty

They met via mutual interest and that's all they've talked about. They know one or two personal things about each other but that's it. I'm guessing it would be odd for her to ask


Posted By: callmeDEva
Date Posted: Sep 04 2014 at 2:26pm
Originally posted by creole booty creole booty wrote:

It's an even that anyone can go to? That's not that bad. I wouldn't admit I did that until I knew they really REALLY liked me though.

Some things r only ok when u like the person. When u don't like them, everything they do annoys u or is negative.


Yeah anyone can go. It's a homecoming parade and usually the entire city is there


Posted By: Rumbera
Date Posted: Sep 04 2014 at 2:26pm
what type of event ?


Posted By: callmeDEva
Date Posted: Sep 04 2014 at 2:27pm
Originally posted by thewonderfulwa thewonderfulwa wrote:

So she wouldnt be going to the event if the guy wouldnt be there sounds stalkerish to me.
I hope she doesnt see anything to break her po lil' heart.


She wasn't even planning on gong! She just put two and two together and was like..."I know all his frat brothers will be there so he has to be."


Posted By: Marcelo22
Date Posted: Sep 04 2014 at 2:28pm
thats how a lot of dudes "bump" into girls they feeling


while yall twindling yall thumbs not being observant of your surroundings, dudes be planning how they gonna bump into u during lunch or magically park right next to u and  strike up a conversation with u in the parking lot


Posted By: trudawg
Date Posted: Sep 04 2014 at 2:28pm
Everybody so afraid of actually appearing to be interested in someone. I really wish we could learn to get over ourselves a bit more, the world would be a better place.

Life is so damn short.
(1) If you like someone, tell them
(2) If you want to do something, do it
(3) If you want to go somewhere, go

These rules have helped me enjoy life just a tad bit more in my "old age."


Posted By: callmeDEva
Date Posted: Sep 04 2014 at 2:29pm
Originally posted by Miss B Miss B wrote:

<span style="font-size: 12.222222328186035px; line-height: 18.66666603088379px;">Depends.....</span><div style="font-size: 12.222222328186035px; line-height: 18.66666603088379px;">
<div style="font-size: 12.222222328186035px; line-height: 18.66666603088379px;">How did she find out he was going? Did he tell her he was going and mentioned details (1 pt), just so happen to see a flyer on her newsfeed with him commenting that he's going (2 pts), did he vaguely mention it and she googled to fill in the details (3 pts) specifically go to his confirmed FB events (4 pts), or take a peep at his phone/email calendar (7 pts), have someone to hack into his accounts (50 pts)?

Was she also invited to the event? If she wasn't invited at all and only heard about it when she discovered he was going....10 pts. If she passively heard it (FB, instagram, flyer on car, lol) at least one other place before she found out he was going and decided to to, 5 pts. If she was personally invited by someone attending, 1 pt)

Did they already meet in person? (1 pt) or have they only communicated on-line up to this point? (5pts)

I think anything over 8 is somewhat stalkerish. Anything over 16 means you might need to keep a special eye on her.
<div style="font-size: 12.222222328186035px; line-height: 18.66666603088379px;">
<div style="font-size: 12.222222328186035px; line-height: 18.66666603088379px;">With that said, I'm all for research. But I'd need more details to formulate a less stalkery yet still effective approach.


No they've never met in person. She joined this forum online to meet people in her area and then found out they were both Greek.

But based on your grading scale she's not too crazy


Posted By: Princess_S
Date Posted: Sep 04 2014 at 2:45pm
Look at it this way, People go to events all the time hoping to meet someone. She just happens to know who that person is. I see nothing wrong here. She has a little crush most likely.


Posted By: PurplePhase
Date Posted: Sep 04 2014 at 2:46pm
Originally posted by trudawg trudawg wrote:

Everybody so afraid of actually appearing to be interested in someone. I really wish we could learn to get over ourselves a bit more, the world would be a better place.

Life is so damn short.
(1) If you like someone, tell them
(2) If you want to do something, do it
(3) If you want to go somewhere, go

These rules have helped me enjoy life just a tad bit more in my "old age."

Clap


Posted By: Gkisses
Date Posted: Sep 04 2014 at 2:55pm
Originally posted by callmeDEva callmeDEva wrote:

Originally posted by Gkisses Gkisses wrote:

Why not just ask him to go with her. Seems like shes trying not appear "thirsty" by acting undeniably in need of hydration.


Yeah she's thirsty

They met via mutual interest and that's all they've talked about. They know one or two personal things about each other but that's it. I'm guessing it would be odd for her to ask


More reason to ask and stop with the Nancy Drew tactics. Its early either he gonna say yes or no. Thats better than trying to inject herself in a fake by chance situation.


Posted By: rell85
Date Posted: Sep 04 2014 at 2:59pm
Nothong wrong with it....if they connect fine if not oh well.


Posted By: Rumbera
Date Posted: Sep 04 2014 at 3:12pm
Homecoming event and the whole town is going to be there.. She should go with a group of friends so she doesn't look so parched.


Posted By: callmeDEva
Date Posted: Sep 04 2014 at 3:32pm
Originally posted by trudawg trudawg wrote:

Everybody so afraid of actually appearing to be interested in someone. I really wish we could learn to get over ourselves a bit more, the world would be a better place.

Life is so damn short.
(1) If you like someone, tell them
(2) If you want to do something, do it
(3) If you want to go somewhere, go

These rules have helped me enjoy life just a tad bit more in my "old age."


I feel you..but she's super shy

Being outgoing/spontaneous isn't easy for everyone


Posted By: ms_wonderland
Date Posted: Sep 04 2014 at 5:14pm
if that's the boost she needs then I say go for it...it's not really stalkerish...it happens in romantic comedies all the time.  I've done it myself and I am not a stalker. Geek


Posted By: NuAttitude
Date Posted: Sep 04 2014 at 6:22pm
Originally posted by callmeDEva callmeDEva wrote:

Originally posted by trudawg trudawg wrote:

Everybody so afraid of actually appearing to be interested in someone. I really wish we could learn to get over ourselves a bit more, the world would be a better place.

Life is so damn short.
(1) If you like someone, tell them
(2) If you want to do something, do it
(3) If you want to go somewhere, go

These rules have helped me enjoy life just a tad bit more in my "old age."


I feel you..but she's super shy

Being outgoing/spontaneous isn't easy for everyone
True but once you break out of that shell............Evil Smile


Posted By: Wildfire
Date Posted: Sep 04 2014 at 6:29pm
thats not stalkerish. 


Posted By: Lite Brite
Date Posted: Sep 04 2014 at 11:51pm
Its fine


Posted By: whitrhymes
Date Posted: Sep 05 2014 at 8:42am
Originally posted by callmeDEva callmeDEva wrote:

Originally posted by thewonderfulwa thewonderfulwa wrote:

So she wouldnt be going to the event if the guy wouldnt be there sounds stalkerish to me.
I hope she doesnt see anything to break her po lil' heart.


She wasn't even planning on gong! She just put two and two together and was like..."I know all his frat brothers will be there so he has to be."
 
I don't think there's anything wrong with it, sometimes you have to create opportunities. Besides it sounds like something fun to do/ an opportunity to meet other men as well. Sounds like more positives than negatives to me.


Posted By: whitrhymes
Date Posted: Sep 05 2014 at 8:48am
You all have never gone somewhere knowing someone you like will be there, or there's a good chance they might be there?
 
I'm all for open communication as well, but she doesn't even know if she likes him yet really, nothing wrong with creatign a situation where they might get to know eachother a little better.   If she asked him out on a date, some would call that thirsty too. 


Posted By: tatee
Date Posted: Sep 05 2014 at 8:55am
LOL @ MissB's points system.



Posted By: coconess
Date Posted: Sep 05 2014 at 9:05am
i dont think theres anything wrong with it. 



Posted By: PurplePhase
Date Posted: Sep 05 2014 at 9:10am
I once heard about a high school girl at one school who called the coach at another school to get a [soon to be world famous] player's phone number.

Stalker? lol

(



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