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ON MONYETTA SHAW BURNING HER TUBES FOR NE-YO

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Topic: ON MONYETTA SHAW BURNING HER TUBES FOR NE-YO
Posted By: bindy
Subject: ON MONYETTA SHAW BURNING HER TUBES FOR NE-YO
Date Posted: Aug 29 2014 at 10:12pm

http://madamenoire.com/462954/monyetta-shaw-tubes-burned/" rel="nofollow - ON MONYETTA SHAW BURNING HER TUBES FOR NE-YO AND THE SACRIFICES WE MAKE FOR MEN

http://madamenoire.com/462954/monyetta-shaw-tubes-burned/#disqus_thread" rel="nofollow - 87 COMMENTS
August 26, 2014 ‐ By  https://plus.google.com/116482175056051174600" rel="nofollow - Victoria Uwumarogie
http://madamenoire.com/462954/monyetta-shaw-tubes-burned/" rel="nofollow - http%3A%2F%2Fmadamenoire.com%2F462954%2Fmonyetta-shaw-tubes-burned%2F&layout=button_count&locale=en_US&sdk=joey&send=false&show_faces=false" rel="nofollow"> 0 
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http%3A%2F%2Fmadamenoire.com%2F462954%2Fmonyetta-shaw-tubes-burned%2F&layout=button_count&locale=en_US&sdk=joey&send=false&show_faces=false" rel="nofollow">
http://cdn.madamenoire.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/08/monyettaneyo.png" rel="nofollow">Monyetta says Ne-Yo broke up with her over the phone two months before going public with their split via Instagram.


I’m not sure if you’ve been tuning into “Atlanta Exes,” but I would have to say that the person whose story really tugs at my heartstrings the most is Monyetta Shaw (Torrei is a little too sensitive/petty at times, Tameka is too abrasive with her opinions, Sheree is a little immature and Christina…well, I actually like her too).  The former fiancée of Ne-Yo is still trying to move on from her famous flame while holding on for dear life at the same time…

You see, the former couple still live together with their two children, despite the fact that the singer has already publicly started dating someone new (Shaw claims that their living arrangement is temporary). But she says that at some point she wants to move on and date someone new–it’s just been hard to get out there to start.

When asked by cast member Christina Johnson during yesterday’s episode if she was ready to deal with a new  http://madamenoire.com/462954/monyetta-shaw-tubes-burned/#" rel="nofollow">man  who might want her to have more kids, Shaw broke down in tears because she revealed that she can no longer have children. While with Ne-Yo, as a family, they made the decision after she had their son Mason (they also have eldest daughter Madilyn, born 11 months before) that because they had a boy and a girl, they weren’t going to have anymore children. With that in mind, Shaw had her tubes burnt by a doctor who until the very moment she did it, asked repeatedly, “Are you sure?” This was all while she was in her late 20s, under the impression that they were going to be together for the rest of their lives. Now that they’re not together anymore, she’s very angry.

“What if I meet the one and he doesn’t have kids? I can’t give you kids. That right there, it gets me. It makes me angry. From that, that’s why I see why some  http://madamenoire.com/462954/monyetta-shaw-tubes-burned/#" rel="nofollow">women  are bitter.”

This whole scene was very sad. Shaw thought that they were going to be a solid family and that their future was going to be bright, only for Ne-Yo to realize after such a big decision was made that he didn’t want to be with her anymore. And she can’t really  http://madamenoire.com/462954/monyetta-shaw-tubes-burned/#" rel="nofollow">get away  from him to heal completely because she’s made the decision to continue living in his home.

When I saw this scene play out I thought to myself, ‘why couldn’t they just use birth control?’ That’s such a major decision to make as young  http://madamenoire.com/462954/monyetta-shaw-tubes-burned/#" rel="nofollow">parents  in their 20s so soon after bringing two kids into the world. I also thought, ‘Why couldn’t he get a vasectomy!?’

Another big thing I thought about after watching this scene was the reality of the crazy sacrifices we make for relationships that  http://madamenoire.com/462954/monyetta-shaw-tubes-burned/#" rel="nofollow">men  often don’t.

I was just having a conversation with a friend this past  http://madamenoire.com/462954/monyetta-shaw-tubes-burned/#" rel="nofollow">weekend . After being committed to a man for four years who she was supposed to become a Mrs. to (seriously, they set a date), she left that relationship immensely hurt because he went back on his word one too many times and took her for granted. She sacrificed quite a bit for her partner (including moving to the other side of the country to be with him) and did very sweet things for her man that he wouldn’t do for her. Now she too is unsure about stepping back into the dating world, worried that she won’t find the man who will appreciate her and all she does, but instead, find more hurt and pain.

The only advice that I could give to her is to do what comes naturally to her. If it’s in her heart to go out of her way for her partner, then she’ll do it. But I told her that she shouldn’t do too much to the point where she feels like she gives and gives and gives, only to feel empty after the fact.

Shaw did just that. Not only did she have Ne-Yo’s children and burn her tubes after the fact, but she also got a tattoo on her body with the singer’s government name (Shaffer Smith) because she was that committed and in love.

We as women all do some very interesting things and make major sacrifices (including forgoing friends and  http://madamenoire.com/462954/monyetta-shaw-tubes-burned/#" rel="nofollow">family ) for people who we think are as invested in the relationship as we are. The easiest answer would be to say that you should go into relationships with your eyes open, but falling in love is a mutha, right?  Your heart can really have you out here confused with your nose wide open. I’ve been there too.

So I sympathize with Shaw, but I applaud her for sharing her story so that other women know and will think long and hard about what could happen before making such major decisions for love (aka, a man). In a recent chat with  http://necolebitchie.com/2014/08/exclusive-ne-yos-ex-fiance-monyetta-talks-public-break-up-lessons-on-love-and-why-shes-still-living-with-ne-yo/" rel="nofollow - NecoleBitchie  though, Shaw said that despite all she’d given and lost, she still doesn’t regret anything about her relationship with Ne-Yo and had this advice for others:

“Just love. Love with all your heart. Love yourself first. Because who knows what’s going to happen? Don’t have any regrets and don’t hold back. Even being hurt and going through heartbreak, you still live and you’re living life and you just gotta go into it full throttle. Love yourself first and just be open to love.”

You can check out the revealing conversation between Shaw and Johnson below:

- See more at: http://madamenoire.com/462954/monyetta-shaw-tubes-burned/#sthash.qybJwxHJ.dpuf



Replies:
Posted By: PurplePhase
Date Posted: Aug 29 2014 at 10:16pm
boy that is sad.
why couldn't he get a vasectomy? No insurance (joke)

women do too much.


Posted By: bindy
Date Posted: Aug 29 2014 at 10:21pm
Ne-Yo also broke up with her over social media (not face to face), even though they were living in the same house.


Posted By: Bribby
Date Posted: Aug 29 2014 at 10:25pm
Dawggg tell me why I was thinking of looking on here for some discussion on this. I haven't even watched, but from what my mom told me that's so dirty of him. I was just looking at something on bossip, neyo and his new girl holding some baby.


Posted By: smaison
Date Posted: Aug 29 2014 at 10:27pm
i've never been that in love. 


Posted By: Miss B
Date Posted: Aug 29 2014 at 10:27pm
Originally posted by bindy bindy wrote:

Ne-Yo also broke up with her over social media (not face to face), even though they were living in the same house.


Seriously??? That's dirty.


Posted By: Bribby
Date Posted: Aug 29 2014 at 10:29pm
Women really do do too much. I remember all them problems with all those bc, all just to keep a man happy who could care less I felt sick, he cared, but not really. 
I'm glad with what I'm on now. That's a little extreme tying the tubes and all, I just want all women to be educated on all the forms of bc.
I'm sure she was educated.
Was this her first love?
Man


I remember hearing he broke up with her online too, I thought it wasn't true, but I think it is


Posted By: BonitaApplebaum
Date Posted: Aug 29 2014 at 10:36pm
Ish like this burns me up... Reason why you should love yourself first, and not be willing to put more in a relationship REGARDLESS of who its with, then the other party...

If a person gives you %10 don't give them %90, give then %20 at most, because when the relationship is over you will have nothing for yourself or anyone else...


Posted By: bindy
Date Posted: Aug 29 2014 at 10:36pm
Ne-Yo is 31 years old....I bet he will marry and have at least 1 more child in the future.


Posted By: SoutherNtellect
Date Posted: Aug 29 2014 at 10:37pm
Originally posted by Miss B Miss B wrote:

Originally posted by bindy bindy wrote:

Ne-Yo also broke up with her over social media (not face to face), even though they were living in the same house.


Seriously??? That's dirty.


As per the show,
He broke off their engagement over the phone. He announced it on IG


Posted By: PurplePhase
Date Posted: Aug 29 2014 at 10:42pm
Originally posted by smaison smaison wrote:

i've never been that in love. 


people give love a bad rep LOL


Posted By: EPITOME
Date Posted: Aug 29 2014 at 10:53pm
she tied her tubes for an alleged homosexual? she lost.


Posted By: browneyez4548
Date Posted: Aug 29 2014 at 11:10pm
Originally posted by EPITOME EPITOME wrote:

she tied her tubes for an alleged homosexual? she lost.


She burned them. Now my question is, why didn't she just tie them? Why something so permanent?

He tried it with the right one though, Neyo would be nothing more than a memory in the sky if that were me...


Posted By: hauteshellbi
Date Posted: Aug 29 2014 at 11:22pm
Wow that's so sad

I agree with the person who said ne yo is gonna have another kid smh


Posted By: noneyons
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 12:14am
if there were an incognito option, i'd share my neyo story but there's not so nah


Posted By: bindy
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 12:21am
Originally posted by noneyons noneyons wrote:

if there were an incognito option, i'd share my neyo story but there's not so nah
Then why even mention your Ne-Yo story?


Posted By: noneyons
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 12:22am
so admin will consider giving  us an incognito option


Posted By: Alias_Avi
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 12:23am
lol

Weak women lose


Posted By: PurplePhase
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 12:27am
Pm it to me. I'll post it in the first person.


Posted By: bindy
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 12:28am
She should have at least gotten married first before burning her tubes...


Posted By: noneyons
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 12:31am
Originally posted by PurplePhase PurplePhase wrote:

Pm it to me. I'll post it in the first person.


too late. cat's out the bag. but i do have stories from other people with experiences with other celebrities though. 

do we even have an admin here or is this a free for all?


Posted By: thewonderfulwa
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 12:35am
Yes I agree I wanted to feel sorry for her but he asked her that and they were not married doesnt make any sense to me to dont try to stop me from moving on and you can.


Posted By: PurplePhase
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 12:35am
do what other members do, make another username to post your juicy news under lol
or 3


Posted By: noneyons
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 12:48am
nah, purp. too much work. 

to bindy and the people who thanked her post, let's petition admin to give us more options so we can spice this thang up a little bit. sh*t, i aint claiming will smith, denzel or no sh*t like that, just neyo. and i aint even claiming that nicca 

but i do have stories to tell...


Posted By: Prtybrwneye_z
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 1:02am
Sad! Some women sacrifice way too much for men who wouldn't do the same for them. I get being in love but if you find yourself making all the major sacrifices in a relationship that's a red flag. I would have agree to consider something like that down the road, there are too many BC options available and if he wanted a guarantee then he would have had to go get a vasectomy.


Posted By: PurplePhase
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 1:04am
Originally posted by noneyons noneyons wrote:

nah, purp. too much work. 


lol. I agree


Posted By: PurplePhase
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 1:05am
we used to have that option


Posted By: NJHairLuv
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 1:07am
she looks so beautiful on the show. she really looks like a different person that who i used to see on pix posted on bhm etc over the years. can anyone give their assessment of the cosmetic work that may have been done? thx


Posted By: eanaj5
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 2:52am
no sympathy, she should have listened to her friends/family because i refuse to believe no one loved her enough to not have said something...should have at least waited for a damn ring


Posted By: afrokock
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 3:39am
she was in her late twenties???

old enough to make her own decisions

meh!


Posted By: OhMyCurlz
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 3:58am
......because no one has ever made an extremely stupid decision in their twenties in the name of "love". 




Posted By: eanaj5
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 4:10am
Originally posted by OhMyCurlz OhMyCurlz wrote:

......because no one on here has ever made an extremely stupid decision in their twenties in the name of "love". 



that woman was damn near 30. Stop. And to do something so permanent...this wasnt her signing for a car for a broke aint sh*t man that ended up fcking up her credit. This was removing her ability to give life.

If she knew in her heart of hearts that she wanted more babies then she shouldnt have went through with this...this isnt the 1960's, she had plenty of birth control options at her disposal and she chose the most permanent. Bye felicia. She should have loved herself more. the fact that she's angry about this after the fact is very telling...it wasnt even a mutual agreement, the sterilization was something he wanted, not them together...foolish


Posted By: OhMyCurlz
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 4:22am
Yes... most people don't permanently prevent themselves from giving birth if they know in their "heart of hearts" they want more kids (Geek). She made a decision with someone she cared about that they would not have more kids together because she thought they were going to stay together. Women compromise often and get the short end of the stick, that's what the entire OP is about. She made a very stupid decision. That's not unusual. Whether it's getting your credit phucked or having kids with a bum (what is more permanent than that?)... most women have done something stupid/sacrificed over a ni**a, period. 


Posted By: bindy
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 4:52am
In all seriousness.....it would have been more practical for Ne-Yo to  have had a vasectomy.

A vasectomy can be reversed and he could have frozen some of his sperm just in case his vasectomy couldn't be reversed.

According to the site below frozen sperm can live indefinitely. 

http://www.thespermbankofca.org/content/how-long-can-sperm-be-frozen


Posted By: OhMyCurlz
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 4:55am
Originally posted by bindy bindy wrote:

In all seriousness.....it would have been more practical for Ne-Yo to  have had a vasectomy.

A vasectomy can be reversed and he could have frozen some of his sperm just in case his vasectomy couldn't be reversed.

According to the site below frozen sperm can live indefinitely. 

http://www.thespermbankofca.org/content/how-long-can-sperm-be-frozen
True. He's selfish for even asking, she was dumb for agreeing. The fact he asked her to do something so permanent shows he cared more about himself than her and she cared more about him than herself. 



Posted By: afrokock
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 5:40am
plenty black kids out there to adopt



Posted By: PurplePhase
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 7:06am
Originally posted by bindy bindy wrote:

In all seriousness.....it would have been more practical for Ne-Yo to  have had a vasectomy.

A vasectomy can be reversed and he could have frozen some of his sperm just in case his vasectomy couldn't be reversed.

According to the site below frozen sperm can live indefinitely. 

http://www.thespermbankofca.org/content/how-long-can-sperm-be-frozen


it's a much simpler procedure too. Less invasive.

^^vasectomy.


Posted By: bunzaveli
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 8:04am
why on gods earth would ne-yo allow her to be on the show if he is still filling up her bank account and allowing her to live in his house ? how much pull does he have on this woman ?


Posted By: slykitten
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 8:11am
At most, I would've gotten a birth control implant... and that is the most I would do. Even if I knew I never wanted more kids, I wouldn't mutilate myself for anything or anyone.


Posted By: mizzsandra00
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 8:13am
Originally posted by PurplePhase PurplePhase wrote:

boy that is sad.
why couldn't he get a vasectomy? No insurance (joke)

women do too much.

Or strap up.....He would rather permanently stop her from having more children and possibly cause other complications just to avoid using condoms? Or fix himself? He is a total bytch.....


Posted By: Sang Froid
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 8:21am
She doesn't need anymore kids anyway.



Posted By: keelolo1
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 8:39am
Am I the only one that thinks they look alike. Like they could be brother and sister? 


Posted By: nitabug
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 8:40am
Originally posted by afrokock afrokock wrote:

plenty black kids out there to adopt

this. and no black woman should let a man coerce her into permanent bc or abortion. period.


Posted By: ppp38
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 9:02am
Why burn your tubes unless you are 100% certain that you don't want another kid. It shouldn't be dependent on the man that you are currently with but what YOU want regardless of your partner. It sucks for her to not have the ability to have any more kids but I don't have much sympathy for her- there were other more logical options to prevent pregnancy. 

As for the adoption thing, there is nothing wrong with preferring to have your own biological child and wanting to experience a pregnancy. The fact that there are kids out there waiting to be adopted should have little bearing on someone's own desires to produce life. 


Posted By: zolloh
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 9:19am
She said at the time when they were having the boy, they BOTH decided their family was set, they had one of each, they were engaged, had each others tattoos in their nether regions and things were cadillac, so he didnt force her to burn up her tubes.....the problem is a few months later when she's in Houston for All Star weekend, he calls her and tells her the engagement is off and then posts it on IG, some shat about ill always love you but we gotta go our separate ways or some such nonsense, im waiting for the single to drop Stern Smile

She loves him and is waiting for him to come back. When she heard about how he got the ring, she started boohoo'ing and changed her mind real quick about selling it back to the jeweler. His mama and sister seem to be on "her side" with the 'let him sow his wild oats, you also start dating, he'll come back'...the kids dont know they are separated, he still lives in the house and they all still have family dinner every sunday with his mama and sister Stern Smile


Posted By: keepgrowing
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 9:59am
Well, he's dating an ex-stripper now so he has moved on while she waiting for him to come back. 
This is an example of why it is important to love yourself before you can truly love others. She did something for someone that could care less about her happiness. No reason a woman as young as her should get such an extreme form of bc. 


Posted By: tropical-punch
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 10:14am
So you, and a man who you aren't even married to decided not to have anymore kids then you tie your tubes? Logic? She obviously let him make the decision for her.


Posted By: tropical-punch
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 10:15am
Originally posted by noneyons noneyons wrote:

if there were an incognito option, i'd share my neyo story but there's not so nah
But you know where there is an incognito button. So go ahead and mosey on over there and spill the tea.


Posted By: Bribby
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 10:35am
Originally posted by slykitten slykitten wrote:

At most, I would've gotten a birth control implant... and that is the most I would do. Even if I knew I never wanted more kids, I wouldn't mutilate myself for anything or anyone.

Exactly 


Posted By: maysay1
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 10:38am
She's a grown up. She needs to own her decision. It has nothing to do with him. Her body, her choice.

And she can still have a biological child, it'll just be more difficult and expensive. Such is life.


Posted By: bunzaveli
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 10:38am
id get a vasectomay for a woman




Posted By: newdiva1
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 12:56pm
What's fucced up is he let her do that sh*t knowing he was gonna break up with her.


Posted By: thewonderfulwa
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 12:58pm
I know some men are looking for a fool but no one should have to tell you to use your common sense which is difficult when your in love but I never set myself to think any of my relationships would last forever.


Posted By: rell85
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 1:28pm
Oh well...that's what happens when you let someone make choices for you.


Posted By: bindy
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 3:05pm
Originally posted by maysay1 maysay1 wrote:

She's a grown up. She needs to own her decision. It has nothing to do with him. Her body, her choice.

And she can still have a biological child, it'll just be more difficult and expensive. Such is life.

How can she have another biological child?


Posted By: smaison
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 3:39pm
I ain't never gonna be that in love.
I just don't have it in me to love anyone like that.



Posted By: melikey
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 3:54pm
Originally posted by bindy bindy wrote:

Originally posted by maysay1 maysay1 wrote:

She's a grown up. She needs to own her decision. It has nothing to do with him. Her body, her choice.

And she can still have a biological child, it'll just be more difficult and expensive. Such is life.


How can she have another biological child?


Ivf


Posted By: mizzsandra00
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 3:55pm
Originally posted by smaison smaison wrote:

I ain't never gonna be that in love.
I just don't have it in me to love anyone like that.



Right....the only person I will love enough to put them completely first is my children.....


Posted By: melikey
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 3:59pm
Seems like she only regrets her decision because it might impact her finding a new new man.


Posted By: bindy
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 4:00pm



Posted By: mizzsandra00
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 4:08pm
I honestly think she's more hurt than anything....


Posted By: miana79
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 6:02pm
This is sooo sad!!!!


Posted By: newin2009
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 6:04pm
Based on Bindy's findings, she can have Neyo pay to fix her tubes. However, I'm gonna go with Mizzsandra00's answer and say she's hurt more than anything.


Posted By: K_Camille
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 6:05pm
She will be alright.


Posted By: Ladycoils
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 6:08pm
I agree with everyone else there were other options for them to go about it and it does seem like she only regrets it now that they aren't together.


Posted By: BBpants
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 6:19pm
This is why you can't do too much for men....


Posted By: naturesgift
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 11:41pm
come now, this sounds so Dramatic- If this is true I don't think she did this for him. I think she did it because she didn't want anymore kids...
there are other options- people men and women need to take responsibility for their own choices Fame is a freak show


Posted By: PurplePhase
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 11:42pm
Originally posted by bunzaveli bunzaveli wrote:

id get a vasectomay for a woman




Heart
a man who knows




Posted By: PurplePhase
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 11:43pm
Originally posted by smaison smaison wrote:

I ain't never gonna be that in love.
I just don't have it in me to love anyone like that.



some of these things have me thinking I've never been in love even after years of marriage LOL


Posted By: bindy
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 11:49pm
Originally posted by PurplePhase PurplePhase wrote:

Originally posted by smaison smaison wrote:

I ain't never gonna be that in love.
I just don't have it in me to love anyone like that.



some of these things have me thinking I've never been in love even after years of marriage LOL

Maybe you are just in love with yourself most.....


Posted By: PurplePhase
Date Posted: Aug 30 2014 at 11:51pm
bindy, that's  it.

bad Purple! lol



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