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Relationship advice

Printed From: Black Hair Media Forum
Category: Lets Talk
Forum Name: Talk, Talk, and More Talk
Forum Description: In this Forum, the talk is about everything that can be talked about.
URL: http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/forum_posts.asp?TID=371396
Printed Date: Nov 25 2017 at 6:24am


Topic: Relationship advice
Posted By: jacy_babi
Subject: Relationship advice
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 5:07pm

Hi ladies,

I need to ask you for your advice on an issue I’m having with my current boo.

So he’s at college right now in his second year. In his first year of studies, he was in a study group with his lady who is 6 years older than him and married. They had as friendly as a relationship needed with someone who is in a study group but they didn’t maintain contact over summer.

She has recently been contacting him and after an exam which they both had she invited him to her flat which is opposite their exam centre. I personally would not invite another man to my home if I was married but hey that’s just me. Anyways when he was at her flat she told him she was having problems with her marriage, that she is seeking to get a divorce during the summer and she told my boo that her husband doesn’t please him sexually. I don’t understand why a woman would tell another man who she has barely been in contact with about the state of her sexual life with another man. I think that is just so disrespectful. He came home and told me about it, we both agreed she

Anyways, she recently FB’d my bf inviting him to go for a picnic, just the both of them. In the FB convo, she asked him lots of questions about his life, his family and even sent  10 pics of her family to him

I don’t think he should go. Thoughts?




Replies:
Posted By: coconess
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 5:10pm
he shouldnt go… duh.

delete before its too late


Posted By: thewonderfulwa
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 5:10pm
She wants to fukk & Your BOO is entertaining it get it under control soon or she might have a new daddy for her kids.


Posted By: DiorShowGirl
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 5:11pm
*waits for the relationship brigade to come in*

*hey Carolina this tea is very good*Wink


Posted By: kerysdream7
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 5:11pm
Of course he shouldn't go. He should cut her off.


Posted By: jacy_babi
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 5:12pm
Yes,she knows he has a girlfriend


Posted By: maysay1
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 5:12pm
Originally posted by jacy_babi jacy_babi wrote:

Hi ladies,

I need to ask you for your advice on an issue I’m having with my current boo.

So he’s at college right now in his second year. In his first year of studies, he was in a study group with his lady who is 6 years older than him and married. They had as friendly as a relationship needed with someone who is in a study group but they didn’t maintain contact over summer.

She has recently been contacting him and after an exam which they both had she invited him to her flat which is opposite their exam centre. I personally would not invite another man to my home if I was married but hey that’s just me. Anyways when he was at her flat she told him she was having problems with her marriage, that she is seeking to get a divorce during the summer and she told my boo that her husband doesn’t please him sexually. I don’t understand why a woman would tell another man who she has barely been in contact with about the state of her sexual life with another man. I think that is just so disrespectful. He came home and told me about it, we both agreed she

Anyways, she recently FB’d my bf inviting him to go for a picnic, just the both of them. In the FB convo, she asked him lots of questions about his life, his family and even sent  10 pics of her family to him

I don’t think he should go. Thoughts?



There's no reason for him to want to go unless he's interested in her.

So if he goes, you already know what the deal is. Someone who is not interested in there being any confusion would clearly let her know that they are not friends and not to contact him in any way.

Look at what he does and don't let yourself get caught up in drama.


Posted By: jacy_babi
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 5:15pm
She also called him hun and sent him kisses


Posted By: thewonderfulwa
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 5:16pm
They might have smashed already.

Did you read all the messages???
not the ones he wants you to see just scroll up.


Posted By: liesnalibis
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 5:17pm
Man...


Posted By: eanaj5
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 5:20pm
damn, this is gonna be a mess


a mess that i shall thoroughly enjoy







Posted By: sexyandfamous
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 5:21pm
What does he say about all that? I mean, it is great that he shared all that with you, but why is he still entertaining her? Why did he go to her house after the test?
You can tell him to not go to this picnic, but it does not mean he won't see her somewhere else.
Make sure he is being loyal to you.


Posted By: sexyandfamous
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 5:21pm
Originally posted by thewonderfulwa thewonderfulwa wrote:

They might have smashed already.

Did you read all the messages???
not the ones he wants you to see just scroll up.


Yeah, you need to read all of them - but if he is doing something with her, he may have deleted the previous messages.


Posted By: thewonderfulwa
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 5:22pm
Originally posted by sexyandfamous sexyandfamous wrote:

Originally posted by thewonderfulwa thewonderfulwa wrote:

They might have smashed already.

Did you read all the messages???
not the ones he wants you to see just scroll up.


Yeah, you need to read all of them - but if he is doing something with her, he may have deleted the previous messages.



And if he deleted them the she knows whats up or maybe not


Posted By: maysay1
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 5:24pm
Originally posted by jacy_babi jacy_babi wrote:

She also called him hun and sent him kisses


Are you actually in a relationship where the words "we are boyfriend/girlfriend and will not be seeing anyone else" have actually been said?


Posted By: thewonderfulwa
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 5:24pm
He might want some of that vintage vagina


Posted By: carolina cutie
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 5:25pm
Originally posted by DiorShowGirl DiorShowGirl wrote:

*waits for the relationship brigade to come in*

*hey Carolina this tea is very good*Wink
Here.Embarrassed


OP, she wants to have sex with your boyfriend and if he respects his relationship with you, he needs to cut her off completely ASAP.

Marriage problems, sex problems, "getting a divorce soon", needs a shoulder to cry on...all the usual signs.Dead


Posted By: DiorShowGirl
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 5:25pm
called him hun and sent him kisses??????Confused 


Posted By: nemesis1
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 5:30pm
If he's not into her, the answer should be an automatic NO. No need to deliberate.

Ermm


Posted By: DiorShowGirl
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 5:33pm
Originally posted by eanaj5 eanaj5 wrote:

damn, this is gonna be a mess


a mess that i shall thoroughly enjoy








yep cause you know someone will pop in and say something that isConfused and then all hell will break loose..LOLLOL  just waiting for that magic moment to happen..Big smile


Posted By: rell85
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 5:40pm
There's more he's just not telling you...at some point he should know when to stop entertaining this woman.


Posted By: sexyandfamous
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 5:45pm
Does she have his phone number? She may be teasing him with naked pics.


Posted By: Marcelo22
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 5:47pm
u should let him go


Posted By: jacy_babi
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 5:47pm
Yep, I've read all the messages. Nothing to indicate that they've slept with each other but I don't like his conversational tone with her. He asks her questions as if he doesn't want the conversation to end


Posted By: jacy_babi
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 5:48pm
Yes, we're both 23


Posted By: jacy_babi
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 5:50pm
We have a relationship where we are honest about advances from other people.

He wants to meet up with her in person as they were friends last year and he wants to set it straight that he's very happy in the relationship


Posted By: OoDles O
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 5:50pm
You share that dude.


Posted By: thewonderfulwa
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 5:51pm
Originally posted by jacy_babi jacy_babi wrote:

Yep, I've read all the messages. Nothing to indicate that they've slept with each other but I don't like his conversational tone with her. He asks her questions as if he doesn't want the conversation to end


he doesn't or he wouldnt entertain her advances.


Posted By: OoDles O
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 5:52pm
Originally posted by jacy_babi jacy_babi wrote:

We have a relationship where we are honest about advances from other people.

He wants to meet up with her in person as they were friends last year and he wants to set it straight that he's very happy in the relationship

oh and she's doesn't care about how happy of a relationship he's in with you.


Posted By: thewonderfulwa
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 5:54pm
Originally posted by jacy_babi jacy_babi wrote:

We have a relationship where we are honest about advances from other people.

He wants to meet up with her in person as they were friends last year and he wants to set it straight that he's very happy in the relationship


he doesn't have to do that in person.


Posted By: maysay1
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 5:57pm
Originally posted by jacy_babi jacy_babi wrote:

We have a relationship where we are honest about advances from other people.

He wants to meet up with her in person as they were friends last year and he wants to set it straight that he's very happy in the relationship


It doesn't take a meetup to block someone on facebook. And not answer her phone calls. She'll get the message.

If you're ok with this, then cool. But this will not end well.


Posted By: NuAttitude
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 5:59pm
Originally posted by coconess coconess wrote:

he shouldnt go… duh.

delete before its too late
Wink i was just going to say this.


Posted By: NuAttitude
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 6:06pm
Why don't the three of you enjoy the picnic.Wink  I'm sure there might be some things you want to know as well.


Posted By: coconess
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 6:13pm
Originally posted by NuAttitude NuAttitude wrote:

Why don't the three of you enjoy the picnic.Wink  I'm sure there might be some things you want to know as well.

this isnt a bad idea… 
if its just a friendly picnic.. they shouldnt have an issue or think its weird for you to go too. 



Posted By: Brjasuga51
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 6:15pm
Girl he shouldn't be entertaining her if he is into u. School ...in class that's it. NO EXTRA CURRICULAR ACTIVITIES. NIP IT IN THE BUD. PROBABLY SOMETHING ALREADY STARTED


Posted By: melikey
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 6:23pm
He's loving the attention
He definitely should have told her he would be coming to the picnic and bringing you along if he really is that naive in thinking they have a friendly relationship. But he's not. He knows she wants to smash and he's loving every moment.


Posted By: foxyroy19
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 6:28pm
You both let each other know if someone has made advances.....?
 


Posted By: herwoman
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 6:43pm
He want to see what that be like


Posted By: eanaj5
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 6:47pm
Originally posted by foxyroy19 foxyroy19 wrote:

You both let each other know if someone has made advances.....?
 

I honestly dont see an issue with this.
while i dont think it should be a 'rule' or a requirement to disclose every single advance, i do think its healthy to feel comfortable mentioning when someone does make a ridiculous pass like this.
OP and her man could laugh about it together, but going to that woman's apt after a test would not have particularly amused me, if i were OP tbh Stern Smile


Posted By: foxyroy19
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 6:57pm
I am thinking that this game they are playing about (honesty) is getting out of control because now the "boyfriend" is taking their game a little too far.  Her boyfriend knows what he is doing...he is in the lead.


Posted By: BBpants
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 7:04pm
lmaooo

they either gonna f*ck or have been .


Posted By: ms_wonderland
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 7:07pm
yup, definitely fcking.  He could've ignored her completely.  Guys don't do anything like visit apts or entertain messages unless the door is open.


Posted By: nitabug
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 7:13pm
Yes, he should go and bring you.


Posted By: nitabug
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 7:14pm
You should go, ask him to excuse himself, check her ass, then yall should leave. 


Posted By: BBpants
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 7:18pm
Originally posted by jacy_babi jacy_babi wrote:

We have a relationship where we are honest about advances from other people.

He wants to meet up with her in person as they were friends last year and he wants to set it straight that he's very happy in the relationship


Aka he gonna f*ck her one last time LOL


Posted By: OoDles O
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 7:24pm
might as well knock that 3some off the bucket list.
j/s


Posted By: f8dagrate
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 7:27pm
Originally posted by OoDles O OoDles O wrote:

might as well knock that 3some off the bucket list.
j/s


Hey OOdles


Posted By: OoDles O
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 7:33pm
hi F8 

:curryrape:


Posted By: Gkisses
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 8:17pm
Yo boo already let her spit on the knob. Just for asking this question I think he should go.


Posted By: AwesomeAries
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 8:19pm
Originally posted by Gkisses Gkisses wrote:

Yo boo already let her spit on the knob. Just for asking this question I think he should go.




Posted By: AwesomeAries
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 8:22pm
bhm ain't sheit and I am here for it!


Posted By: f8dagrate
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 9:59pm
Originally posted by LovesHim LovesHim wrote:

OP does the old lady have money... This could be beneficial to all parties involved 


Likes the way you think


Posted By: Gkisses
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 10:12pm
She only 6 yrs older so she not that old. Hell he probably saw that vinegar douche bottle in the bathroom and wanna see wha she yankin wit. He betta go tame that snappa. Be worried op


Posted By: DiorShowGirl
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 11:17pm
did she(OP)just up and leave?   it is quiet in here..


Posted By: Diane (35)
Date Posted: Jun 11 2014 at 11:19pm
CryCryCry
Originally posted by Gkisses Gkisses wrote:

She only 6 yrs older so she not that old. Hell he probably saw that vinegar douche bottle in the bathroom and wanna see wha she yankin wit. He betta go tame that snappa. Be worried op

CryCry



Posted By: rickysrose
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 1:02am
he's setting you up to play the fool

'bout you know she's just a friend, I was helping het prepare for a test! I told you where I was going!

Let him be over there and move on 




Posted By: foxyroy19
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 1:08am
Originally posted by SamoneLenior SamoneLenior wrote:


I wonder how often they get hit on?

who has time to run tell that all the time

even if it happens once a month or two times a year....if you don't entertain it, who cares
 
 
I agree Samone!  The whole other people still find me attractive game is silly and dangerous.Sleepy


Posted By: foxyroy19
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 1:11am
I pray Jaci baby got her head out the sand and hopefully cussing his ass out while she throwing his clothes out the window.


Posted By: afrokock
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 1:19am
One moment


Posted By: afrokock
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 1:27am
Originally posted by foxyroy19 foxyroy19 wrote:


You both let each other know if someone has made advances.....?
 
there's this


Posted By: afrokock
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 1:29am
Originally posted by foxyroy19 foxyroy19 wrote:


I am thinking that this game they are playing about (honesty) is getting out of control because now the "boyfriend" is taking their game a little too far.  Her boyfriend knows what he is doing...he is in the lead.
yup


Posted By: afrokock
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 1:32am
Lol that nigguh hit

sh*t, uni first time round, I know i would have


Posted By: mizzsandra00
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 8:39am
Did anyone tell her they already and she finna be single? If not.....


They already and you finna be single.


Posted By: NJHairLuv
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 11:35am
Smile


Posted By: eanaj5
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 11:57am
OP, we need an update on the picnic situation, dont forget about us Cry


Posted By: afrokock
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 12:12pm
Originally posted by mizzsandra00 mizzsandra00 wrote:

Did anyone tell her they already and she finna be single? If not.....


They already and you finna be single.
he ain't gonna leave her

But he gonn' keep fuccking her


The reason he told her is if she found some sh*t the he's too a be like, but I told you already

That whole spin of my man ain't hitting it right is to get him to smash on the regular

I bet he asked her how cme she got a man but they fuccked to get rid of his own guilt



Posted By: sexyandfamous
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 1:44pm
Originally posted by Gkisses Gkisses wrote:

She only 6 yrs older so she not that old. Hell he probably saw that vinegar douche bottle in the bathroom and wanna see wha she yankin wit. He betta go tame that snappa. Be worried op


what's this vinegar douche you are talking about... serious questionQuestion


Posted By: coconess
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 1:49pm
Vinegar is supposed to tighten it up


Posted By: sexyandfamous
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 1:53pm
Originally posted by foxyroy19 foxyroy19 wrote:

I am thinking that this game they are playing about (honesty) is getting out of control because now the "boyfriend" is taking their game a little too far.  Her boyfriend knows what he is doing...he is in the lead.


yes yes yes
OP your boyfriend reminds me of a VERY similar story on a http://forum.blackhairmedia.com/dating-questions_topic371244_page1.html?KW=feelings" rel="nofollow - thread that another girl posted about her friend dating a guy who mentioned some girl who had feelings for him. Guys nowadays are playing the "i-am-honest-with-you" card to smash another girl while pretending to feel pity for the girl who caught feelings.

He most likely already did something. It is obvious that this woman is into him. Why would he entertain her on facebook, go to her house and now debate with you if he should go to this picnic?

You should just break up with him, it is better for your emotional health and body health - you never know what kind of diseases he'll bring from sharing his d!ck with her..........


Posted By: Brjasuga51
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 2:06pm
Originally posted by coconess coconess wrote:

Vinegar is supposed to tighten it up
Nopes...it drys out your PH...douching is not recommended. Alum tightens...so they say


Posted By: NuAttitude
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 2:10pm
Originally posted by coconess coconess wrote:

Vinegar is supposed to tighten it up
Confused Really???  I've never heard that before.  I thought the vinegar was to wash away and/or neutralize odor and bacterial discharge.Shocked


Posted By: Lonisha87
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 2:10pm
Giiiiiiiiirrrrrrrl. No.


Posted By: NuAttitude
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 2:11pm
Originally posted by Brjasuga51 Brjasuga51 wrote:

Originally posted by coconess coconess wrote:

Vinegar is supposed to tighten it up
Nopes...it drys out your PH...douching is not recommended. Alum tightens...so they say
Hmmmmm sounds like a yeast infection waiting to happen.Wink


Posted By: coconess
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 2:13pm
Yea douching is bad..
But I know I remember Nita and Sandra talkin about tightening up their cooches by putting some in their baths..
I think it was ACV


Posted By: rickysrose
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 2:19pm
Originally posted by rickysrose rickysrose wrote:

he's setting you up to play the fool, ready made excuses

'bout you know she's just a friend, I was helping her prepare for a test! I told you where I was going!

Let him be over there and move on 



Posted By: Gkisses
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 2:25pm
That pickled possi thread was alive .....dude getting his homework and head needs met in one swoop.


Posted By: whitrhymes
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 2:43pm
Linda, hunny listen...


Posted By: kerysdream7
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 2:50pm
Originally posted by whitrhymes whitrhymes wrote:

Linda, hunny listen...
LOLLOLLOL


Posted By: afrokock
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 3:07pm
Originally posted by whitrhymes whitrhymes wrote:

Linda, hunny listen...


Posted By: ThoughtCouture
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 3:12pm

did the op ever explain why he would even entertain going on a picnic with some other chick????  i only read the 1st page...



Posted By: carolina cutie
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 3:13pm
^Nope.


Posted By: ThoughtCouture
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 3:16pm
oh.  wtfConfused


Posted By: carolina cutie
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 3:25pm
^Guuurl!LOL


Posted By: MsBMW
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 4:04pm
lmao this thread had me CryLOL


Posted By: sugabanana
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 4:18pm
lmaoooooooooo I didnt even see this gem.


Posted By: india100
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 4:19pm
Jacy -babi listen to the song below . The man will break your heart unless you wake of up .
Play Song
. "Tyrone"

[Erykah] "Lets See How Ya'll Groove to this"
"Alright"
I'm gettin' tired of your sh*t
You don't never buy me nothin'
See Everytime you come around
You got to bring Jim, James, Paul, & Tyrone
See why can't we be by ourselves, sometimes
See I've been having this on my mind
For a long time
I just want it to be
You and me
Like It used to be, Baby
But ya don't know how to act
So matter of fact
[Chorus]
I think ya better call Tyrone
(Call Him)
And Tell him come on,
Help you get your sh*t (Come On, Come on)
You need to Call Tyrone
(Call Him)
And tell him I said come on
Now everytime I ask you for a little cash
You say no and turn right around and ask me for some ass
Oh, Well hold up
Listen partna
I ain't no cheap thrill
Cause Miss Badu is always comin' for real
And you know the deal
Everytime we go somewhere
I gotta reach down in my purse
To pay your way and your homeboys way
And sometimes your cousin's way
They don't never have to pay
Don't have no cars
Hang around in bars
Try to hang around with stars
Like Badu
I'm gon' tell you the truth
Show and prove
or get the boot
I think ya better, ([Erykah Badu] He, he he)
(Call Him)
And tell him come on
Help you get your sh*t
You need to call Tyrone
(Call Him)
[Erykah Badu] "Hold On"
But ya can't use my phone






Posted By: spencer4hire
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 4:25pm
Originally posted by mizzsandra00 mizzsandra00 wrote:

Did anyone tell her they already and she finna be single? If not.....


They already and you finna be single.

     Omg!


Posted By: AshBash89
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 4:29pm
This is all very basic.


Posted By: ms_wonderland
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 6:01pm
Originally posted by whitrhymes whitrhymes wrote:

Linda, hunny listen...

Lmfao


Posted By: rickysrose
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 6:35pm
Originally posted by whitrhymes whitrhymes wrote:

Linda, hunny listen...

ICried!!!




Posted By: Princess_S
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 7:06pm
well this ended just as i expected it to.
 
 
Keep us updated thoug Op. sorry for your lossStern Smile


Posted By: AwesomeAries
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 7:27pm
Did op come back singing Ronald Isley contagious and crying cuz she caught him busting down ole girl?


Posted By: jacy_babi
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 8:26pm

poof



Posted By: herwoman
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 8:29pm
[QUOTE=jacy_babi] Damn you BHM


Posted By: Gkisses
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 8:31pm
Poof? Dafugumean


Posted By: rickysrose
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 8:37pm
Originally posted by jacy_babi jacy_babi wrote:

I obviously agree that he should not go and see her; I made this thread to prove to myself that I am not exaggerating. However, I did say we share pretty much everything, especially when it involves the relationship so I let him know about the thread and he has read your replies and wants to answer back. He’ll type out his thoughts. 

 

Good evening everyone. Hope you are all doing well. I am not quite sure who it is I am addressing, your average age group etc. but it would be safe to assume it is mostly ladies who frequent this particular site. Given this, I would hate to get caught up in a sexist kind of argument for what I am about to say, but I have witnessed my girl being overcome by morbid fears after some of your responses and I have something to say about it nonetheless. Before moving on to the juicy bits, let me make something very clear from the kick-off so that no one argues that I am disguising my ill intent or dirty secrets behind defensive, long-winded arguments. I intend on going on that stroll in the park and having a discussion with the married woman. Shocking, I know. It will most definitely NOT be a picnic (I haven’t even done that with my girlfriend) and my girlfriend is of course welcome to join, no pressure on her, this is not a matter of trust (I will not play the trust card) it is simply a matter of choice – her choice and her choice only. I am merely chiming in to say how utterly flabbergasted I am left before the malice of unscathed, raw human emotion; especially when it comes in the form of – shall I say – supposedly friendly advice?

My lady was quite accurate with the facts, if not a bit concise, and I trust you have been accurate with your feelings. I am grateful for your responses but I can’t help but notice that these verge from mild bafflement and cautious advice to downright pseudo-prophetic assertions of the sort: “Married woman wants to ; Your boyfriend entertains the thought; If he goes, he’s interested in her [God, you draw these perfect little lines in your head and can be so didactic at times, everything makes perfect sense and it’s all the same to you, no matter who’s involved & individuals’ differences – sorry, I just couldn’t resist, I’ll wait till later for building up my argument]; He may have deleted the messages; Delete her; Get it under control or she gets a new daddy for her kids [she has no kids]; It is already too late, they are smashing [Smashing? Really??]”.

To the rest of you offering good advice, I am thankful – your opinions are heeded and weighed in. But this riposte of mine is very specifically directed towards this latter kind of mischievous chirpers, the ones that have filled my good girl with doubts and have introduced undue distress into this relationship. It has the purpose of being a bit sharp, with a scattering of pungent for good measure, in hopes that this will blunt the edge of your forthcoming comments and spare future victims of aforementioned distress. Now unto you, little chirpers, I say this. If you have successfully come to a conclusion about a two-year long relationship based on a singular paragraph non-exhaustively describing a singular event, or you have described the inner workings of a dynamic love affair between two complex – we are all complex, you may NOT argue against that – individuals based on the SAME little paragraph, and you have furthermore effectively categorized the protagonists under neat little subgroups in your head so that you can cost-effectively call my girlfriend pretty much naïve before hailing me a cheater, then there are two scenarios at play here. One makes me sad for the outlook on humanity, the other makes me sadder.

Off with the good news first. I am sad that you spend so much of your time and energy being as creative as evidenced on this thread… on this thread. A married woman sending me some pictures indisputably means we are “smashing”; now that’s creative I say. You could use that creativity and resourcefulness to further other aspects of your life or the life of others. The world would be a much better place if you did; and I would be much obliged. There’s a certain amount of vanity associated with taking a peek at the everyday lives of others by taking time out of your own lives, wouldn’t you say? Granted, we asked for your advice. But there’s also a certain amount of vainglory (slightly different thing, look it up) associated with thinking you have been innately graced with the skillset of an adroit psychologist and the capacity of an enlightened guru for resolving peoples’ troubles with a mere hurtful-albeit-quirky quip – and that we have most definitely not asked for. You can keep your eschatological drama, it truly makes me sad.

And now for the bad news. I am yet more saddened by the fact that some of you may have been so inadvertently scarred in life so as to assume that if I have a conversation about how to save a marriage with an old female acquaintance/friend of mine who asked for advice, while also setting her straight about level of closeness permitted, kisses, “honey” comments and the like and letting her know how absolutely blessed I feel in my current relationship face-to-face, I am indubitably cheating. Who has done this to you? If you have been hurt by someone in like manner please shy away from handing out advice until you have resolved your own issues.

My girlfriend and I are apparently here for your advice, I will obviously not shut the world on us; but neither will I have vain, self-indulgent hypocrites taking guesses at our current status by throwing darts at us blind-folded. I hear your cute little voices piping up already: “How dare you, you little bigot! You do not know us; you have not lived life in our shoes, seen the world through our eyes, heard what our ears have heard – our experiences are no object of your understanding and these experiences can never be condensed in our two lines of a comment. You do not know us… What makes you think you can judge us?”

To which I would aptly retort: “My point exactly… You do not know me; you have not lived life in my shoes, seen the world through my eyes, heard what my ears have heard – my experiences are no object of your understanding and my experiences can never be condensed in a paragraph’s wo


That's all I got... damn he's so long winded, post couldn't hold it all




Posted By: mizzsandra00
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 8:37pm
Originally posted by Brjasuga51 Brjasuga51 wrote:

Originally posted by coconess coconess wrote:

Vinegar is supposed to tighten it up
Nopes...it drys out your PH...douching is not recommended. Alum tightens...so they say

Apple cider doesn't....it tightens too....Embarrassed


Posted By: carolina cutie
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 8:39pm
Thanks Ricky!


Posted By: BBpants
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 8:39pm
Good job Ricky!! LOL


Posted By: rickysrose
Date Posted: Jun 12 2014 at 8:41pm
girl... don't let the verbosity fool you

He doth protest too much

But don't believe us, time will tell, so will that married cougar, eventually

Hopefully we're wrong, best of luck and love




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