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Why Steve Harvey Needs to Have a Seat

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Printed Date: Aug 21 2018 at 10:13pm


Topic: Why Steve Harvey Needs to Have a Seat
Posted By: PurplePhase
Subject: Why Steve Harvey Needs to Have a Seat
Date Posted: Apr 21 2014 at 9:25pm

Why Steve Harvey Needs to Have a Seat

Posted:
STEVE HARVEY

As Mimi Faust and Nikko Smith's sex tape makes the rounds on the Internet, I knew it was only a matter of time before the policing began. Sure enough, yesterday, a friend posted a recording of Steve Harvey on the radio, in which he earnestly advised "young women" against the making of sex tapes, etc.

The excerpt of his little speech that I heard begins with him explaining that the Internet is forever, and how what gets put online stays online forever. Case in point. And while it's true that many people -- young or not -- lack full understanding of the permanence of the Internet and how nothing can ever be truly erased, I already have a problem with the direction this sermon is going because..."young women?" Now, I haven't actually seen Mimi and Nikko's sex tape, but from what I understand... it's a sex tape with Mimi and Nikko. Not Mimi. Mimi and Nikko.

Steve Harvey-types view women and sex through the lens that misogyny has provided for centuries: The lens that renders men invisible when there is an instance of shame being doled out. Casual sex, unwed pregnancy; centuries of misogyny dictate that it only takes one to tango; that the shame of "illicit" sex falls squarely on the shoulders of one and not two. And those shoulders always belong to a woman. When it comes to wagging a finger or calling someone a whore for premarital sexual activity, the man involved somehow dematerializes into a puff of smoke, leaving the woman to bear the brunt of society's scorn alone.

In the radio recording, Steve Harvey goes on to rail against the Internet: "The Internet has become a playground for evildoers. You sit up and you listen to somebody and all the sudden they're making decisions and comments about you and they never even met you."

He then adds: "Please young women out there, think of yourself... think about what people will say about you when you're not around; stuff people will say behind your back."

What's annoying about Steve Harvey is that he delivers these little gems under the guise of being interested in the empowerment/protection of women and girls. A thin guise, I might add. Harvey warns girls about the backlash they will receive from random people on the Internet if they participate in a sex tape, but isn't Harvey pretty much exactly that: A random voice on the Internet/TV/radio making comments about girls and women he's "never even met?"

He cautions us about the shame we will receive if we dare make a sex tape, but uses the same shame as the tool to keep us from doing it. Shamed if you do; shamed if you don't. According to Harvey, women's lives should be dictated by the expectations and presumptions of others. Our bodies are not our own: We exist at the will of laws perpetuated by people like Steve Harvey, who would have us covering our ankles in the name of modesty. Harvey isn't interested in empowering us; he only wants to lay red tape in tight boxes around us in his effort to corral us into his idea of the ideal woman.

And Steve Harvey's ideal woman is exactly what you would expect, fitting neatly into the virgin/whore dichotomy that has plagued women for lifetimes. "You're not here for sex," Harvey says in the recording. "You're here for life. God didn't create you for sex."

Oh?

And why not? Why are we not here for sex? Isn't it part of life? But more importantly, how did this conversation go from talking about sex tapes to sex in general? It's one thing to say "Hey boys and girls, sex tapes are forever. It may be sexy now, but you may not want the whole world seeing that in ten years." Sure. Fair facts. But that's not enough for Harvey, and for some reason, he seems incapable of addressing boys. Only girls.

Rather than using the Mimi and Nikko sex tape as a teachable moment about privacy, permanence and the longevity of Internet decisions, Harvey can't resist transforming that moment into a diatribe about shame and God's plan for women's bodies.

You see, those who are truly interested in empowering women and girls use different words. Instead of "Think of the horrible things people will say about you," people who are truly interested in empowering women and girls say, "Don't worry about what people say. You are autonomous." Instead of, "You weren't put here for sex," people who are truly interested in empowering women and girls say, "Sex is one of many beautiful parts of life when it is consensual. You can have as much or as little of it as you want; just protect yourself." These are the words we use when we seek to empower girls and women.

The kind of shaming tactics Steve Harvey employs are not only tired, patriarchal regurgitations, but they fly in the face of actual women's empowerment and turn "sex" and "women" into painful opposites that should have nothing to do with another. And everything else aside: men and boys are still absent from Harvey's lecture.

This has all been written about before. Extensively. Yet, Steve Harvey still added this to the end of his little speech:

    You're putting your most precious gift out on display. For a pearl, you gotta dive to the bottom of the ocean... Ain't no diamonds laying on top of the earth: they don't grow like corn... This thing every man got to have: your body. Your precious jewel. You're sitting on a gold mine. Please act like it, young ladies. Act like you're sitting on a gold mine. Because it is what every man is after. And we will pay dearly for it.

Is anybody else creeped out? Is anybody else extremely uncomfortable about the fact that Steve Harvey is telling girls that they should treat their vaginas like a means of currency, because men will "pay dearly for it"? Let me tell you a few things, Mr. Harvey. I'll put them in bullet points so you don't miss anything:

    * Women's vaginas are not our most precious gift. Our minds, our souls, our personalities, are far more precious and will do more for us in our lives than the so-called gold mine between our legs. In fact, for vaginas to be gold mines, they don't bring us much gold just sitting down there being vaginas. Ever heard of women's struggle for equal pay? Come on, Steve.

    * Diamonds aren't that f*cking great. In fact, they're intrinsically worthless. Their value is based on artificial scarcity, a system created by tycoons who seek to propagate the belief of their rarity to increase their worth. It's almost like the idea of chastity. Chew on that.

    * If women "aren't here for sex," yet it's the thing that "every man wants," then does that mean that men are here for sex? Why would "God" make men for sex and not women? That seems silly. No, it doesn't seem silly. It is.

    * Nikko was in the sex tape too. Where's your sermon for him? Aren't men and boys' bodies just as valuable? Is their sex not also precious?

Steve Harvey's explicit advice to young women is that when it comes to our sexual activity, we should think before we act -- before we "give it away" -- because "think of what people will say about us behind our backs." And when it comes to a society that makes women's bodies and what women do with them a matter of scorn and shame, Steve Harvey knows which side he's on: The side that does the scorning and the shaming. His critique looks no further: It stops at the young women who are held prisoner by this ideology. He does not criticize the ideology itself; rather, he upholds it.

Steve Harvey is not interested in empowering or protecting young women. Instead, he joins the likes of Tyler Perry, Tyrese and Chey B, who sit on their towering soap boxes making money off policing the lives and bodies of women. Write a book about young boys for once, Mr. Harvey, if you want to impress me; write a book about rape culture and the way we teach young men that women's bodies are trophies, objects, status symbols, commodities.

Oh, wait. You already know. Because with all your jabbering about gold mines and diamonds and precious jewels, you're doing the teaching. The woman, Mimi, that you are criticizing is doing exactly what you suggest. You said what's between our legs is a gold mine, right? Isn't Mimi set to make a gold mine from this sex tape? Oh, but that's not what you meant, right? A little too much autonomy, mixed with too little care for "what people say behind her back."

Have a seat, Mr. Harvey. Have this one. Or this one. Or this one. Just make sure you choose a sturdy chair, because times are changing: Women see through your crap and we're not here for it. Get comfortable. You may be sitting for a long time.
NBC via Getty Images



Replies:
Posted By: Midna
Date Posted: Apr 21 2014 at 9:27pm
Are we barely now acknowledging the man is in dire need of a seat?


Posted By: Mixer
Date Posted: Apr 21 2014 at 9:27pm
"young women?"

How's that offensive?


Posted By: PurplePhase
Date Posted: Apr 21 2014 at 9:28pm
Originally posted by Midna Midna wrote:

Are we barely now acknowledging the man is in dire need of a seat?


LOL


Posted By: GoodGirlGoneGr8
Date Posted: Apr 21 2014 at 9:28pm
Steve Harvey has been needing to have a damn seat...since he wrote that act like a woman book.


Posted By: PurplePhase
Date Posted: Apr 21 2014 at 9:35pm
I was hoping the network would sit him down/cancel show. But I guess people like his show.


Posted By: GoodGirlGoneGr8
Date Posted: Apr 21 2014 at 9:40pm
^^I can't figure out who...

He's so obnoxious I can't even stand to watch him on family feud.

This is the same man who threw his ex-wife in jail and would try and steal Bernie Macs gigs? I can't with him...


Posted By: Mixer
Date Posted: Apr 21 2014 at 9:41pm
Originally posted by GoodGirlGoneGr8 GoodGirlGoneGr8 wrote:

^^I can't figure out who...

He's so obnoxious I can't even stand to watch him on family feud.

This is the same man who threw his ex-wife in jail and would try and steal Bernie Macs gigs? I can't with him...
Really? Links please.


Posted By: yurika975
Date Posted: Apr 21 2014 at 9:42pm
I don't hate him but he is proving a point. Often echoed in threads right here on BHM. Should he speak to both men and women? Darn tooting. Let's be real, the woman gets the full load of the cannons of blame. When a problem comes up with a single mom how many say She needs to close her legs. Tie up those tubes! But little is said to men about getting snipped or wearing condoms or being he-whores! 


Posted By: GoodGirlGoneGr8
Date Posted: Apr 21 2014 at 9:43pm
Originally posted by Mixer Mixer wrote:

Originally posted by GoodGirlGoneGr8 GoodGirlGoneGr8 wrote:

^^I can't figure out who...

He's so obnoxious I can't even stand to watch him on family feud.

This is the same man who threw his ex-wife in jail and would try and steal Bernie Macs gigs? I can't with him...
Really? Links please.


The Bernie Mac interview was in GQ mag, lemme see if I can find it...


Posted By: demilee27
Date Posted: Apr 21 2014 at 9:45pm
I don't like him and his self righteous personality


Posted By: carolina cutie
Date Posted: Apr 21 2014 at 9:46pm
I like him on Family Feud.

Don't care for his opinions tho.


Posted By: JasmineE02
Date Posted: Apr 21 2014 at 9:52pm
I like when Kenan Thompson plays him on SNL.  I hate everything else about Steve Harvey.  He's so obnoxious.  The person who wrote this article seems like someone I'd like to hang out with. Heart


Posted By: PurplePhase
Date Posted: Apr 21 2014 at 9:56pm
Originally posted by JasmineE02 JasmineE02 wrote:

I like when Kenan Thompson plays him on SNL.  I hate everything else about Steve Harvey.  He's so obnoxious.  The person who wrote this article seems like someone I'd like to hang out with. Heart


the Millionaire skit--love it! LOL


Posted By: Marcelo22
Date Posted: Apr 21 2014 at 10:01pm
That whole article was BS, all they had to write was I dont like Steve Harvey and leave the feminist crap out of it.


Posted By: SoutherNtellect
Date Posted: Apr 21 2014 at 10:06pm
snooze


Posted By: Bored w/Out Me?
Date Posted: Apr 21 2014 at 10:13pm
I hope them big teeth bite a hole in his chin....



*Raises Black Panther Fist for Mary*


Posted By: GoodGirlGoneGr8
Date Posted: Apr 21 2014 at 10:13pm
Originally posted by Mixer Mixer wrote:

Originally posted by GoodGirlGoneGr8 GoodGirlGoneGr8 wrote:

^^I can't figure out who...

He's so obnoxious I can't even stand to watch him on family feud.

This is the same man who threw his ex-wife in jail and would try and steal Bernie Macs gigs? I can't with him...
Really? Links please.


I can't find the article anywhere, but this is the only thing that kinda addresses the Bernie Mac situation...

http://gapersblock.com/ac/2010/09/27/steve-harvey-speaks-the-feud-with-bernie-mac/" rel="nofollow - http://gapersblock.com/ac/2010/09/27/steve-harvey-speaks-the-feud-with-bernie-mac/


And his wife...

http://blackamericaweb.com/2013/12/22/steve-harveys-ex-wife-mary-vaughn-tells-her-side-of-the-story-from-jail/" rel="nofollow - http://blackamericaweb.com/2013/12/22/steve-harveys-ex-wife-mary-vaughn-tells-her-side-of-the-story-from-jail/


Posted By: liesnalibis
Date Posted: Apr 21 2014 at 10:21pm
It seems like this piece was assigned to her in class or maybe by her editor, whatever the case may be because she is really doing the most. The fact is, no one is gonna care about that Niko person's sordid past ten years from now and I'm pretty sure no one cares now. He is being realistic. Not everyone lives in a fantasy world or operates based on how things should ideally be if this were a perfect world. She seems like a bitter person and no doubt finds fault with anything anyone says regardless of their intent.


Posted By: JasmineE02
Date Posted: Apr 21 2014 at 11:29pm
I liked the feminist angle.  I probably wouldn't have read it without it.  


Posted By: Sang Froid
Date Posted: Apr 21 2014 at 11:44pm
Feminism is annoying. 


Posted By: femmefatale85
Date Posted: Apr 21 2014 at 11:44pm
i find him extremely sexist and desperate women love it

i wish he'd go away


Posted By: Mixer
Date Posted: Apr 21 2014 at 11:44pm
Originally posted by GoodGirlGoneGr8 GoodGirlGoneGr8 wrote:

Originally posted by Mixer Mixer wrote:

Originally posted by GoodGirlGoneGr8 GoodGirlGoneGr8 wrote:

^^I can't figure out who...

He's so obnoxious I can't even stand to watch him on family feud.

This is the same man who threw his ex-wife in jail and would try and steal Bernie Macs gigs? I can't with him...
Really? Links please.


I can't find the article anywhere, but this is the only thing that kinda addresses the Bernie Mac situation...

http://gapersblock.com/ac/2010/09/27/steve-harvey-speaks-the-feud-with-bernie-mac/" rel="nofollow - http://gapersblock.com/ac/2010/09/27/steve-harvey-speaks-the-feud-with-bernie-mac/


And his wife...

http://blackamericaweb.com/2013/12/22/steve-harveys-ex-wife-mary-vaughn-tells-her-side-of-the-story-from-jail/" rel="nofollow - http://blackamericaweb.com/2013/12/22/steve-harveys-ex-wife-mary-vaughn-tells-her-side-of-the-story-from-jail/
Thanks!Big smile


Posted By: JasmineE02
Date Posted: Apr 21 2014 at 11:49pm
Feminism has been quite useful for me.  I appreciate its presence. 


Posted By: BBpants
Date Posted: Apr 21 2014 at 11:50pm
Steve Harvey is a douche bag. I hate him.


Posted By: Mixer
Date Posted: Apr 21 2014 at 11:51pm
You hate everyone.Sleepy


Posted By: msjaim2
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 12:00am
I loathe steve harvey, but this article was full of feminist rhetoric. ..like she read straight from the handbook


Posted By: femmemichelle
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 12:04am
Yeah well I agree with Steve on this one whole heartedly so she can take her feminism and save it for a worthier cause. Steve is right. 

A woman involved in that will take the brunt of it so he is speaking to WOMEN. Yes, we're well aware it takes two. But we're also well aware of the unequal shaming and Steve is warning young women about that backlish they most certainly will receive. I see nothing wrong. 

People just want a reason to cry about misogynists (although I do agree he's shown misogynistic traits in the past.)


Posted By: Sang Froid
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 12:05am
Originally posted by JasmineE02 JasmineE02 wrote:

Feminism has been quite useful for me.  I appreciate its presence. 

You a white woman?


Posted By: ModelessDiva
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 12:15am

yikes


Posted By: miana79
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 12:16am
I was actually surprised Steve git married to a chocolate sista because he is a straight up coon.


Posted By: JasmineE02
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 12:16am
Originally posted by Sang Froid Sang Froid wrote:

Originally posted by JasmineE02 JasmineE02 wrote:

Feminism has been quite useful for me.  I appreciate its presence. 

You a white woman?
Not the last time I checked.  I don't benefit from feminism on the same level as white woman will and I'm not dingy enough to think that most of the white feminists are doing it on my behalf.  I do enjoy a lot of the benefits.  I also surround myself with feminist women of color and we work to further the interests of our own people.   If black feminists have their own special title, I guess I'm one of those. Otherwise, I'm fine with the feminist label. 


Posted By: Marmonette
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 12:18am
Originally posted by JasmineE02 JasmineE02 wrote:

Originally posted by Sang Froid Sang Froid wrote:

Originally posted by JasmineE02 JasmineE02 wrote:

Feminism has been quite useful for me.  I appreciate its presence. 

You a white woman?
Not the last time I checked.  I don't benefit from feminism on the same level as white woman will and I'm not dingy enough to think that most of the white feminists are doing it on my behalf.  I do enjoy a lot of the benefits.  I also surround myself with feminist women of color and we work to further the interest of our own people.   If black feminists have their own special title, I guess I'm one of those. Otherwise, I'm fine with the feminist label. 


Womanism Star




Posted By: JasmineE02
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 12:24am
Thank you Heart


Posted By: _ConcreteRose_
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 12:34am
Originally posted by Marmonette Marmonette wrote:

Originally posted by JasmineE02 JasmineE02 wrote:

Originally posted by Sang Froid Sang Froid wrote:

Originally posted by JasmineE02 JasmineE02 wrote:

Feminism has been quite useful for me.  I appreciate its presence. 

You a white woman?
Not the last time I checked.  I don't benefit from feminism on the same level as white woman will and I'm not dingy enough to think that most of the white feminists are doing it on my behalf.  I do enjoy a lot of the benefits.  I also surround myself with feminist women of color and we work to further the interest of our own people.   If black feminists have their own special title, I guess I'm one of those. Otherwise, I'm fine with the feminist label. 


Womanism Star


logged in to thank this.Big smile 
Seriously though, I encourage every Black woman to read up on Womanism. The history and theory.


Posted By: _ConcreteRose_
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 12:45am
^^^lol YES. Im a pollotarian. I was so happy when I found a word for it instead of rattling off the things I don't eat.


Posted By: JasmineE02
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 12:46am
I appreciate it.  It's as nice as when I found the word "flexitarian"  LOL


Posted By: JasmineE02
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 12:50am
It's like the world opens up and you find your people at last. LOL  I get to find yummy vegetarian and healthful meat-related recipes without the politics and fluff.  I just want to eat. Cry...LOL


Posted By: _ConcreteRose_
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 12:53am
I don't understand this whole, "yeah we know the unequal shaming is wrong but it is what it is" thing. Acquiescing the status quo enables the status quo. It is important for people to speak on things they find troubling and not enable it if they disagree. That's why this criticism of Harvey doesn't upset me one bit.  

It's funny people get mad at this yet Tyler the Creator has been yelling F*ck Steve Harvey for the longest for no reason.LOL


Posted By: liesnalibis
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 12:56am
Originally posted by msjaim2 msjaim2 wrote:

I loathe steve harvey, but this article was full of feminist rhetoric. ..like she read straight from the handbook

Don't they always...


Posted By: JasmineE02
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 12:58am
My dad used to listen to him in the morning and he was just so....ignorant.  That started my dislike. LOL  He's never said anything to make me change my mind.  


On evolution: "Then why we still got monkeys?" Cry


Posted By: Sang Froid
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 1:38am
RT do you have this sh*t already written or are these BHM exclusives? 


Posted By: Random Thoughts
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 1:39am
I've grown weary of speaking for other people or even advising them on what they should do when I have a certain level of privilege. I'm not sure if that's born from me being annoyed when white people attempt to speak for poc or if I'm avoiding situations where my words can come across as self serving.  Anyway, at the risk of sounding self serving, my random thoughts. Big smile

Edit: It's a longer post than I thought it would be.ConfusedLOL

Steve Harvey is not interested in empowering or protecting young women. Instead, he joins the likes of Tyler Perry, Tyrese and Chey B, who sit on their towering soap boxes making money off policing the lives and bodies of women. Write a book about young boys for once, Mr. Harvey, if you want to impress me; write a book about rape culture and the way we teach young men that women's bodies are trophies, objects, status symbols, commodities.

Not necessarily feeling all of the points the author made in the OP but I really feel this. 

It's funny but in the past year or two I've also grown weary of the Brenda's Got A Baby type of songs. J. Cole ( http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y-vQ_VsTkn0" rel="nofollow - Lost Ones ), Kendrick Lamar ( http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XX4la7LwwVk" rel="nofollow - Keisha's Song ,  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xQtWY-ZxFTw" rel="nofollow - No Make-Up ), and a host of other rappers have recently made songs that on the surface sound like a support of women, but almost all of them are about either protecting women from their own bodies or teaching a lesson via a morality drama where the woman is raped, killed, sometimes both.

They are well written and I think well intentioned songs, but they really sound like the 'policing of women's bodies' that the author spoke about, more to soothe the cognitive dissonance of sexually exploitive men than an actual message of substance for women. 

And then I thought about all of the 'yay women' songs I've heard over the years from rappers, with something like Nas'  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WiWNjlhHjeg" rel="nofollow - Black Girl Lost serving as the template for such songs.

Damn near all of them, save for a few, like Talib Kweli's  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=68PV604xNsg" rel="nofollow - Four Women   - though that song is based on a Nina Simone song, which may explain why the track isn't so malecentric - deal almost exclusively with a judgement of 
promiscuity, or some kind of disgust at women being exploited...disgust that only seems to last the length of the track that they are preaching on.

I'm not immune to the guilt, which is why I think I notice it when I see it. It reminds me of the times when I'll get off to an extremely exploitive p0rno flick and then immediately feel guilty about it. "Damn girl, it's nut all OVA yo FACE. You too beautiful for that." And then clean myself up, washing my hands of it. 

I think there is a balance men need to find on speaking of topics concerning women. I appreciate Shad's track ' http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V3nbTB2KHuM" rel="nofollow - Keep Shining ', particularly for the bars. 

http://rapgenius.com/1757847/Shad-keep-shining/And-ive-been-known-to-talk-about-women-on-a-track-or-two" rel="nofollow - And I've been known to talk about women
On a track or two
http://rapgenius.com/1725869/Shad-keep-shining/I-talk-to-women-i-just-cant-talk-for-women-thats-for-you-we-need-women-for-that-more-women-in-rap" rel="nofollow - I talk to women, I just can't talk for women
That's for you
We need women for that
More women in rap



But also for the images of the video, where he is in the background not rapping, instead letting all of the words flow from the mouths of the women, helping to illustrate his point about not speaking for them.

Even if he is technically speaking for them - it's something that can't be avoided if he plans to speak at all - his message doesn't demand that the spotlight be on him. That's something that I don't usually see when these books or songs come out from a male author/artist. They typically want the entire dialogue filtered through their narrow viewpoint.

I agree that the books and movies by Tyreese, Steve Harvey, Tyler Perry, and songs from rappers that are supposed to be about women, speaking for them, yet capitalizing off their perceived but one-sided view of a woman's plight are not really helping anything. I agree that these men are more concerned with governing women than helping than, or better yet encouraging better male behavior.

I know some dislike him on here but I read Hill Harper's Letters to a Young Sister, and gave the book to my godsister. It's a book where he does speak a lot about a young woman's worth, but it's certainly not "don't have sex or he won't respect you," but more of "if he doesn't respect you after he has sex with you, then he probably has a low view of himself." 


But what I appreciate most is he didn't stop at writing a book to young women, he also reached out and published books for young brothers and incarcerated men. His content itself is free to be critiqued on it's own merits but I think he's at least reached for the balance that I think men should take on these issues. 

Anyway. I've had those thoughts about rap songs ever since I listened to and reviewed J. Cole's debut, but haven't had a chance to express them till now.


Posted By: Diane (35)
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 1:53am
That's why me and the entire lurkdom fuxx with RT!!!!Heart

Lol at your admitting (again) your love/hate with the porno thing


Posted By: BBpants
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 2:10am
Originally posted by Mixer Mixer wrote:

You hate everyone.Sleepy


shut up


Posted By: Mixer
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 2:13am


Posted By: Alias_Avi
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 2:24am
Black women adopt all the wrong things from feminism and reject all the right things smh


Posted By: afrokock
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 2:36am
Originally posted by Diane (35) Diane (35) wrote:

That's why me and the entire lurkdom fuxx with RT!!!!Heart

Lol at your admitting (again) your love/hate with the porno thing
yeah that was a dope post


Posted By: K_Camille
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 7:30am
Originally posted by Diane (35) Diane (35) wrote:

That's why me and the entire lurkdom fuxx with RT!!!!Heart

Lol at your admitting (again) your love/hate with the porno thing

Yes!!Clap


Posted By: MsBMW
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 7:36am
Steve Harvey said on the radio this morning that no one is talking about Niko and only MiMi and he should be held accountable...I didn't see anything wrong with what he said yesterday. 


Posted By: kfoxx1998
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 8:09am
Originally posted by Diane (35) Diane (35) wrote:

That's why me and the entire lurkdom fuxx with RT!!!!Heart


Hell yes. 

Originally posted by Random Thoughts Random Thoughts wrote:

I agree that the books and movies by Tyreese, Steve Harvey, Tyler Perry, and songs from rappers that are supposed to be about women, speaking for them, yet capitalizing off their perceived but one-sided view of a woman's plight are not really helping anything. I agree that these men are more concerned with governing women than helping than, or better yet encouraging better male behavior


I would LOVE to see more of the underlined and completely agree with the bolded. 

BHM is a very odd place sometimes.  It sometimes seems like claiming your own pussay as your own is strictly a feminist idea that should be rejected.  Especially if you actually make a decision on how you want to use it.  I just do not have time to clock other peoples vaginas and/or penises. 

And Steve Harvey is an idiot.  A complete clown.  A shark and a phoney.  She wasted her time writing about his irrelevant ass but I guess she is pissed at people who soak that sh*t up.  She should be. 




Posted By: kfoxx1998
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 8:13am
Originally posted by JasmineE02 JasmineE02 wrote:

On evolution: "Then why we still got monkeys?" Cry


Typical Steve Harvey.  IdiotDead


Posted By: ThoughtCouture
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 9:25am
Originally posted by kfoxx1998 kfoxx1998 wrote:


And Steve Harvey is an idiot.  A complete clown.  A shark and a phoney.  She wasted her time writing about his irrelevant ass
 
welp...this sums it up for me quite nicely...


Posted By: Merin
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 9:29am
A friend of mine used to be the event manager at a hotel where he hosted an event. When he would check in to the hotel he wouldn't want to give his credit card info.


Posted By: goodm3
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 10:28am
Some of things Steve Harvey says i do agree with HOWEVER...because of he's had several marriages..i can't.......If im going to follow anyone's relationship advice they need to have been married more than 30years, all their kids are by each other and said kids were born after they got married.


Posted By: carolina cutie
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 11:31am
*Sips tea* No one use feminazi to describe the author or her supporters yet? Hooray BHM.Party


Posted By: JasmineE02
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 11:33am
I might be white.  I've only been back for a week and I'm white AND a coon.  LOL  Do we have BHM bingo?  


Posted By: funkydiva2
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 11:41am
Originally posted by femmemichelle femmemichelle wrote:

Yeah well I agree with Steve on this one whole heartedly so she can take her feminism and save it for a worthier cause. Steve is right. 

A woman involved in that will take the brunt of it so he is speaking to WOMEN. Yes, we're well aware it takes two. But we're also well aware of the unequal shaming and Steve is warning young women about that backlish they most certainly will receive. I see nothing wrong. 

People just want a reason to cry about misogynists (although I do agree he's shown misogynistic traits in the past.)
 
ClapWell said.  I agree with Steve as well.  THIS TIME he is right on point(there have been times though in the past where he needed to have a seat, but this is not one of them..)


Posted By: PurplePhase
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 2:04pm
Originally posted by JasmineE02 JasmineE02 wrote:

My dad used to listen to him in the morning and he was just so....ignorant.  That started my dislike. LOL  He's never said anything to make me change my mind.  


On evolution: "Then why we still got monkeys?" Cry


did you see that interviews on Larry King show? I loved Joy Behar that night.


Posted By: kfoxx1998
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 2:10pm
Originally posted by carolina cutie carolina cutie wrote:

*Sips tea* No one use feminazi to describe the author or her supporters yet? Hooray BHM.Party


LOL


Posted By: JasmineE02
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 2:33pm
Originally posted by PurplePhase PurplePhase wrote:

Originally posted by JasmineE02 JasmineE02 wrote:

My dad used to listen to him in the morning and he was just so....ignorant.  That started my dislike. LOL  He's never said anything to make me change my mind.  


On evolution: "Then why we still got monkeys?" Cry


did you see that interviews on Larry King show? I loved Joy Behar that night.


Yes Cry  It was such a nightmare.  I didn't mention the other highlights of the interview, but it was a clusterf*ck. LOL


Posted By: Printer_Ink
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 2:38pm
Originally posted by yurika975 yurika975 wrote:

I don't hate him but he is proving a point. Often echoed in threads right here on BHM. Should he speak to both men and women? Darn tooting. Let's be real, the woman gets the full load of the cannons of blame. When a problem comes up with a single mom how many say She needs to close her legs. Tie up those tubes! But little is said to men about getting snipped or wearing condoms or being he-whores! 


I agree.

I don't like Steve Harvey either but believe it or not .. he is on point with this issue.

Bottom line .. men and women are different in affairs of the heart, sex etc so the onus will ALWAYS lie on the woman in terms of when to put the brakes on the relationship going toward the bedroom. Always.

Why, because she is the one carrying the uterus around with her. Period. And men are 'wired' to 'polinate' every flower they see. This is biological and will absolutely never change.

That is why a woman will always be a hoe if she sleeps with 10 guys in 1 month and a guy will always be 'the man'if he does the exact same thing.

Women just need to wise up and keep that dime between their knees.


Posted By: OoDles O
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 2:53pm
Im not a Steve Harvey fan in the least… matter fact .."f*ck dat N*g.ga"
(Damn I just broke my N*g.ga name call rule for 2014… ah well)

But that brother is just an old ass pseudo religious commentator with severally antiquated views on male female relationships. But hey, ...he comes from that era though.

and lets be real. what he was saying wasn't exactly false because photos and videos will stay on the internet for life. And No one curr about Male ding dongs or PICS, as it is today, wouldn't be so popular… and Kim K wouldn't be the most hated woman on BHM …. or in life. "That b*tch aint sh*t she got famous off of a sex tape"

Back to Steve Harvey being .."Aint Sh*t" … and he relishes in his old world outdated views. But thats the world that he comes from and the wild part is that a lot of women agree with him too! cause they ain't about to waste a "golden Vagina" on a poor slouch…lol 


Posted By: PurplePhase
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 3:01pm
I caught a snippet of his show in the store one day when he was convincing/coercing a woman to take her husband's last name after they married. After Steve's serrmon, he gave in.  smh

I didn't dare make that thread though lol


Posted By: kfoxx1998
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 3:05pm
See JazBig smile

ETA:  Oodles I forgive you for breaking your code for Steve Harvey.  You hit the nail on the head.  Old, outdated and pseudo religious.  Perfect.  


Posted By: PurplePhase
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 3:06pm
not pseudo tho lol


Posted By: JasmineE02
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 3:16pm
LOL  He seems much better than telling other people how to follow his tenets of his religion.  I'm glad the rigid conventions are starting to slooowly crumble away.


Posted By: alynxx
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 4:54pm
He should have stopped at that book.


Posted By: rohan
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 5:37pm
Originally posted by alynxx alynxx wrote:

He should have stopped at that book. Kings of Comedy.


Posted By: PurplePhase
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 6:34pm
 Rohan,  ITA. I was never really a fan of his comedy but I did like some of his bits in KoC.  He really should have gone away quietly   after that .


Posted By: Marcelo22
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 7:36pm
Originally posted by goodm3 goodm3 wrote:

Some of things Steve Harvey says i do agree with HOWEVER...because of he's had several marriages..i can't.......If im going to follow anyone's relationship advice they need to have been married more than 30years, all their kids are by each other and said kids were born after they got married.

damn u dont respect relationship advice from most people in America then 


Posted By: Ming
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 9:16pm
Originally posted by rohan rohan wrote:

Originally posted by alynxx alynxx wrote:

He should have stopped at that book. Kings of Comedy. The Steve Harvey Show


Posted By: JasmineE02
Date Posted: Apr 22 2014 at 9:49pm
Originally posted by PurplePhase PurplePhase wrote:

 Rohan,  ITA. I was never really a fan of his comedy but I did like some of his bits in KoC.  He really should have gone away quietly   after that .


But we wouldn't have learned about the majesty of our diamond vaginas. Shocked



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