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Tips for a Forcefully Dependent Student

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Printed Date: Nov 21 2017 at 10:33pm


Topic: Tips for a Forcefully Dependent Student
Posted By: Midna
Subject: Tips for a Forcefully Dependent Student
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 9:29pm
BHM, I can't stop crying. My mother is not the nicest nor the most rational person to the point of abuse.

I'm finally calling a spade a spade.

To put it short, I'm trying to pursue billing and coding as a short term goal to get out of this house ASAP.

In past years, I could not receive financial aid because I was considered a dependent and she earned too much. Now that she got fired from one of her jobs, I was hoping her income was now low enough. I don't talk to her much. Other than a simple hello or reading whatever text message she sends me once in a blue moon, we don't talk and I prefer it that way for the sake of peace. But with financial aid, I had to ask her for help through the supplementing of her information or the cosigning of a federal loan I would take out.

It didn't go well.

I'm researching all I can do, but does anyone here have any tips to share? I just want a better job ASAP so I can earn more to leave. I work minimum wage so me already paying for everything except the roof over my head sucks a paycheck away pretty quickly. However, if I pass this interview and secure this new potential job, I can move up to $13 an hour.

Even if I move out, I may still be legally considered a dependent. But at least as long as I'm out of here, I'm fine with that. I don't want to wait until I'm 24 and I'm certainly not getting pregnant but if I have no other options left (besides loan sharks, but no thank you) I'll wait.



Replies:
Posted By: browneyez4548
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 9:33pm
If no one answers this, I'll answer once Scandal is over





Posted By: maysay1
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 9:43pm
First, it really sucks you're going through this. Ugh. But you're smart and resourceful so I'm sure you'll be able to make this work.

I've dealt with a lot of high school students applying for financial aid with no help from family. You just have to make the best of a bad situation. It is possible to get student loans without your mom as a cosigner. The best place to start is with the financial aid office of any school you're going to. Unfortunately, it'll be difficult so just be prepared for that. Obviously try not to take out too many loans, especially for a program that may not be worth it (do your research). But do what you have to do to make things work.

In the meantime, is there anyone else you can live with that would be a more supportive influence in your life? That might help when it comes to tax time because then your mom can't claim you as a dependent which would help your financial aid situation.

As a way to supplement your current wages...have you tried online work? If you have internet there seem to be lots of places to try out. Leapforce comes to mind as well as Amazon Mturk. Check out reddit.com/r/workonline, reddit.com/r/mturk to get more info and wade into it. It seems like any little bit might help your situation. You could also consider something related to one of your hobbies, you cosplay right? Not a lot of black cosplayers showcasing their creations online...at least from what I see. Maybe a blog is something you could do (and monetize).

I wish I had more specific help but my brain is tired at the moment. I'll add more if I can think of it.




Posted By: nitabug
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 9:43pm
How old are you?


Posted By: Midna
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 9:49pm
Thank you, I really do appreciate it.

The university I got accepted at gave me some pretty depressing news when it came to my age so the difficulty factor has already been well established.

I do want to look for loans that don't require a cosigner but the ones I've found so far have been quite sketchy and with a guarantee of capitalized interest even if I defer/pay a set amount/pay interest. I'm far from done researching though.

I will definitely check that subreddit out! And yes I do cosplay! I actually bought a sewing machine a couple of months ago as a means to expand my cosplaying skillset but also create skills for business purposes. There is solidarity with black cosplayers and to bring business into that solidarity would be fantastic.

Thank you. Thank you so much.


Posted By: Midna
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 9:51pm
Originally posted by nitabug nitabug wrote:

How old are you?


I'm 22.

Why I am still considered a dependent, I don't know. :\


Posted By: danieb23
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 9:51pm
You don't need a cosigner for federal loans.

Sorry for your dilemma, && that I can't be more helpful. The dependence thing sucks big time. My cousin is 24, own house, car, career, etc and is still considered dependent.


Posted By: HunnyB
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 9:51pm
Originally posted by browneyez4548 browneyez4548 wrote:

If no one answers this, I'll answer once Scandal is over




|| Pause >>>>>>>>>>>LOL


Posted By: Midna
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 9:53pm
Originally posted by danieb23 danieb23 wrote:

You don't need a cosigner for federal loans.

Sorry for your dilemma, && that I can't be more helpful. The dependence thing sucks big time.


I tried to complete my Fafsa application and because of my eligibility, I was only eligible for an unsubsidized loan that did require one. Ouch

Anyway, thank you.


Posted By: coconess
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 9:55pm
i understand that you cant stand your mom.. but you just said that you pay for everything except the roof over your head and that sucks away most of your check. When your main goal is the schooling which you dont have the money for.. why add to your expenses by needing to pay rent? 

i feel like schooling should be the main priority.. continue avoiding your mother.. youve done it this long. 

i dont have many tips i can offer besides trying to get a good credit card.. try with a credit union.. it wont be 13k but it could help..  could they work out a payment plan for school?
good luck. 


Posted By: yurika975
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 9:57pm
Midna is there any way you could take the course at a local community college? Not to pry but when you say it didn't go well, did she refuse to give you the info you need? So sorry, I know it can be very upsetting. My little sis had a bit of difficulty with this. My dad worked his way through college. I had to work on him. It's all good now and they understand that the info is to help her obtain aid for her education. Plus I now do the taxes for the last few years and increased their refunds. Grr for resistance.


Posted By: danieb23
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 9:57pm
Originally posted by Midna Midna wrote:

Originally posted by danieb23 danieb23 wrote:

You don't need a cosigner for federal loans.

Sorry for your dilemma, && that I can't be more helpful. The dependence thing sucks big time.


I tried to complete my Fafsa application and because of my eligibility, I was only eligible for an unsubsidized loan that did require one. Ouch

Anyway, thank you.


You got some misinformation midna. A federal loans require no consign. Only private. I had to do a small unsubsidized one this semester for some expenses. They asked for references but not a consigner.

I would call again and speak to someone in financial aid. A government loan should NOT ask you for a consigner!!!


Posted By: yurika975
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:00pm
I wondered about that too. Fed loans need references aka who to hit up when you are missing with their money. Private loans need cosigners. Go back, wail and ask to speak to someone. Darn you auto correct...


Posted By: maysay1
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:03pm
Originally posted by Midna Midna wrote:

Thank you, I really do appreciate it.

The university I got accepted at gave me some pretty depressing news when it came to my age so the difficulty factor has already been well established.

I do want to look for loans that don't require a cosigner but the ones I've found so far have been quite sketchy and with a guarantee of capitalized interest even if I defer/pay a set amount/pay interest. I'm far from done researching though.

I will definitely check that subreddit out! And yes I do cosplay! I actually bought a sewing machine a couple of months ago as a means to expand my cosplaying skillset but also create skills for business purposes. There is solidarity with black cosplayers and to bring business into that solidarity would be fantastic.

Thank you. Thank you so much.


Well I think there is so much you can do, especially since you have a sewing machine. I'm into steampunk myself and there isn't near enough black folk creating in that arena. And you have groups of white folks getting paid 1k for steampunk inspired skirt and other stuff.

Is there any way you can do a program through a community college so there will be less financial burden? I just feel like I see loans handed out like candy on halloween (which is obviously not a good thing all the time) that there's got to be a way to do this for you.

Other subreddits to check out might be r/studentloans and r/raisedbynarcissists (for support if you have to continually deal with an irrational ridiculous parent).




Posted By: ms_wonderland
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:04pm
yeah, as far as i know, fed direct loans sub or unsub are for automatically accepted while the direct loan PLUS requires a co-signer for most.


Posted By: Midna
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:06pm
Originally posted by yurika975 yurika975 wrote:

Midna is there any way you could take the course at a local community college? Not to pry but when you say it didn't go well, did she refuse to give you the info you need? So sorry, I know it can be very upsetting. My little sis had a bit of difficulty with this. My dad worked his way through college. I had to work on him. It's all good now and they understand that the info is to help her obtain aid for her education. Plus I now do the taxes for the last few years and increased their refunds. Grr for resistance.


Oh yes, I'm at a CC currently. I paid for school out of pocket since it was more affordable there and the school thankfully allowed payment plans.

I did my GE with the intent of transferring but now that I want a short term career now to support me as I get my get my bachelor's, the cost has risen exponentially.. as expected. It would have risen beyond my ability to pay out of pocket had this loan been for a non-trade uni anyway.


It was her basically refusing and insulting me. I'm stubborn myself and don't like spats so I tried to defuse the situation but she just got more and more volatile.
I broke down once I got in my room. Ouch

I know she's my mom.. but she's not maternal. I keep a safe distance from her for the sake of my sanity and not falling into depression again like I did growing up.

She's more of a bully than a mother.



Posted By: Midna
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:08pm
Originally posted by danieb23 danieb23 wrote:

Originally posted by Midna Midna wrote:

Originally posted by danieb23 danieb23 wrote:

You don't need a cosigner for federal loans.

Sorry for your dilemma, && that I can't be more helpful. The dependence thing sucks big time.


I tried to complete my Fafsa application and because of my eligibility, I was only eligible for an unsubsidized loan that did require one. Ouch

Anyway, thank you.


You got some misinformation midna. A federal loans require no consign. Only private. I had to do a small unsubsidized one this semester for some expenses. They asked for references but not a consigner.

I would call again and speak to someone in financial aid. A government loan should NOT ask you for a consigner!!!


Ah then I must have been directed to a private loan. Dead

I'll try this again. I appreciate your help, everyone!


Posted By: coconess
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:12pm
ive always been independent.. 
too bad you didnt get a legal guardian or something.  





Posted By: Ladycoils
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:12pm
I would talk to a financial aid rep and see if you can file as an independent student. 


Posted By: browneyez4548
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:13pm
Originally posted by HunnyB HunnyB wrote:

Originally posted by browneyez4548 browneyez4548 wrote:

If no one answers this, I'll answer once Scandal is over




|| Pause >>>>>>>>>>>LOL


Ok, show is over LOLEmbarrassed

Due to Olivia's peer pressure, I sip wine when I watch ScandalLOL...I'm not drunk...but I may have to come back tomorrow and explain things a little better if for some reason I don't/can't do it now (I doubt it, but yeah..) anywho...let me see what's been said so far...


Posted By: yurika975
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:13pm
Originally posted by Midna Midna wrote:

Originally posted by yurika975 yurika975 wrote:

Midna is there any way you could take the course at a local community college? Not to pry but when you say it didn't go well, did she refuse to give you the info you need? So sorry, I know it can be very upsetting. My little sis had a bit of difficulty with this. My dad worked his way through college. I had to work on him. It's all good now and they understand that the info is to help her obtain aid for her education. Plus I now do the taxes for the last few years and increased their refunds. Grr for resistance.


Oh yes, I'm at a CC currently. I paid for school out of pocket since it was more affordable there and the school thankfully allowed payment plans.

I did my GE with the intent of transferring but now that I want a short term career now to support me as I get my get my bachelor's, the cost has risen exponentially.. as expected. It would have risen beyond my ability to pay out of pocket had this loan been for a non-trade uni anyway.


It was her basically refusing and insulting me. I'm stubborn myself and don't like spats so I tried to defuse the situation but she just got more and more volatile.
I broke down once I got in my room. Ouch

I know she's my mom.. but she's not maternal. I keep a safe distance from her for the sake of my sanity and not falling into depression again like I did growing up.

She's more of a bully than a mother.

Cry aww really Midna. You seem like a sweet girl but parents can be nuts. I understand wanting to be out and away. 


Posted By: Midna
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:16pm
I can't believe I'm saying this but I think I may join job corps. I don't know how positive the outcome will be (I'll make the final decision after plenty of research) but at least the housing and educative environment may be of help and safety.


Posted By: browneyez4548
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:18pm
Originally posted by Midna Midna wrote:

Originally posted by nitabug nitabug wrote:

How old are you?


I'm 22.

Why I am still considered a dependent, I don't know. :\


You're under the age of 24, doesn't matter how much money you make or if you never ask your mom for a dime of support..the DOE auto consider you dependent...stupid...but yeah...

Has your mom always had custody of you? If you don't want to answer here, you can PM me


Posted By: mizzsandra00
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:20pm
Originally posted by Ladycoils Ladycoils wrote:

I would talk to a financial aid rep and see if you can file as an independent student. 


This....if you explain you have no contact with your parents and have a few witness write a notarized letter the decision is theirs.....sob that shyt all the way up....verbal abuse iono.....this is what I did and they let me files independent from 22-24


Posted By: HunnyB
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:23pm
What to do if your parents refuse to complete financial aid forms.
Remind your parents that submitting the forms does not obligate them to provide support, but that if they refuse to file the FAFSA, you will not be eligible for any need-based aid on your own.

The Higher Education Opportunity Act of 2008 amended the Higher Education Act of 1965 to permit college financial aid administrators to to offer dependent students an unsubsidized Stafford loan without requiring the parents to file a FAFSA, provided that the financial aid administrator verifies that the parents have ended financial support and refuse to file the FAFSA. The unsubsidized Stafford loan is not based on financial need and its a loan, but at least it's something to help you pay for school.

But if you can convince your parents to file the FAFSA, you might qualify for need-based aid, such as the subsidized Stafford loan, Perkins loan, and Pell Grant, as well as institutional aid. By refusing to file, they prevent you from getting any of this aid.



Posted By: browneyez4548
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:24pm
If your mom budges and gives you her info, you could qualify for an income adjustment. Idk when your classes start, but the 2014-15 school year doesn't start till July1st, so if you already have a 13/14 app, you can let your fin aid office know about the drop in income and they should be able to do what is called a "professional judgement" for the 13/14 school year




Posted By: HunnyB
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:25pm
Independent Student Status

The Federal requirements for  http://www.finaid.org/calculators/dependency.phtml" rel="nofollow - independent student status  changed in 1992. Since then, the student must satisfy at least one of the following criteria to be considered independent:



Posted By: browneyez4548
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:26pm
Originally posted by mizzsandra00 mizzsandra00 wrote:

Originally posted by Ladycoils Ladycoils wrote:

I would talk to a financial aid rep and see if you can file as an independent student. 


This....if you explain you have no contact with your parents and have a few witness write a notarized letter the decision is theirs.....sob that shyt all the way up....verbal abuse iono.....this is what I did and they let me files independent from 22-24


I was gonna suggest this, but she lives with her mom...unless things have changed, that's an auto "no" from the fin aid office


Posted By: maysay1
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:26pm
Originally posted by Midna Midna wrote:

I can't believe I'm saying this but I think I may join job corps. I don't know how positive the outcome will be (I'll make the final decision after plenty of research) but at least the housing and educative environment may be of help and safety.


I have just never heard good things about Job Corps...from people who were there and second hand stories. I'd almost think it'd be better to join a branch of the military.

Is there ANYONE you know who you could live with? A relative, friend, professor, anyone who needs a nanny or elder caregiver in exchange for your housing? I'm sure you probably can't rent on your own, but maybe finding roommates who are in a similar position? I know that opens you up to other sucky possibilities, but maybe it's an option. I've known some people who found great roommates through craigslist (like living with an old lady for like 300$/month who never bothered them).

Are there any public universities you could get into that have dorms? That's also an option, especially in public school systems that have some schools with super low enrollment.


Posted By: HunnyB
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:26pm
Midna you have any male prospects?LOL jk


Posted By: HunnyB
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:29pm
Some of the more common situations in which financial aid administrators may be willing to override the dependency determination include:
  • Parents incarcerated or presumed dead.

  • Student was sexually or physically abused by the parents or can document a hostile or neglectful relationship with his/her parents. The student will need to provide copies of protection from abuse orders, court documents, social worker reports, doctor reports, police records, and letters from clergy, as appropriate.

  • Parents cannot be located. For example, a student who emigrated to the US without his/her parents, became a US citizen, and has not been able to contact his/her parents (or even know whether they are still alive).

  • Student legally adopted by their current guardian.


Posted By: coconess
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:30pm
she can probably rent on her own.. 
i just feel like money going towards rent.. especially when you have other expenses and things you wanna do.. is extra hard. 




Posted By: mizzsandra00
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:30pm
Originally posted by browneyez4548 browneyez4548 wrote:

Originally posted by mizzsandra00 mizzsandra00 wrote:

Originally posted by Ladycoils Ladycoils wrote:

I would talk to a financial aid rep and see if you can file as an independent student. 


This....if you explain you have no contact with your parents and have a few witness write a notarized letter the decision is theirs.....sob that shyt all the way up....verbal abuse iono.....this is what I did and they let me files independent from 22-24


I was gonna suggest this, but she lives with her mom...unless things have changed, that's an auto "no" from the fin aid office


Oh I didn't read the whole thing.....Ouch.....Yeah I didn't live with my parents....I moved out at 18....so I was able to actually show proof I lived on my own in another state.....


Posted By: Midna
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:33pm
Originally posted by mizzsandra00 mizzsandra00 wrote:

Originally posted by Ladycoils Ladycoils wrote:

I would talk to a financial aid rep and see if you can file as an independent student. 


This....if you explain you have no contact with your parents and have a few witness write a notarized letter the decision is theirs.....sob that shyt all the way up....verbal abuse iono.....this is what I did and they let me files independent from 22-24


Trust me, if I was still smaller than her, it wouldn't be only verbal abuse.

I just realized this might be the real reason why I love being tall.


Posted By: maysay1
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:35pm
Originally posted by coconess coconess wrote:

she can probably rent on her own.. 
i just feel like money going towards rent.. especially when you have other expenses and things you wanna do.. is extra hard. 




Definitely would be hard. But sometimes you have to buy your peace. If she can find an acceptable roommate situation where she feels safe and can devote her time to school/work and not being emotionally abused, then it could be worth it.

Might have to be unconventional about it though. Find another poor student and share a studio apartment...exchange housing for housekeeping or caregiving...live in an intentional community...buy a van and live in it (lol it could work).


Posted By: Midna
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:39pm
Originally posted by maysay1 maysay1 wrote:

Originally posted by Midna Midna wrote:

I can't believe I'm saying this but I think I may join job corps. I don't know how positive the outcome will be (I'll make the final decision after plenty of research) but at least the housing and educative environment may be of help and safety.


I have just never heard good things about Job Corps...from people who were there and second hand stories. I'd almost think it'd be better to join a branch of the military.

Is there ANYONE you know who you could live with? A relative, friend, professor, anyone who needs a nanny or elder caregiver in exchange for your housing? I'm sure you probably can't rent on your own, but maybe finding roommates who are in a similar position? I know that opens you up to other sucky possibilities, but maybe it's an option. I've known some people who found great roommates through craigslist (like living with an old lady for like 300$/month who never bothered them).

Are there any public universities you could get into that have dorms? That's also an option, especially in public school systems that have some schools with super low enrollment.


That doesn't surprise me. Dead
I've been asking around while trying to skirt around the reason why but it's hard to because she has already broadcasted her version which is highly biased and exaggerated.

So family is a no go, Africans and respect for elders is huge. However, I have contacted my father and I think in terms of family, he is my best bet. He lives in Ghana however, but if he can help me in any way, he does what he can.

I'm going to be asking friends for any possible help in housing and also looking on craigslist. I feel craigslist is risky, but at this point, I'll insure myself with information and proper documentation.


Posted By: coconess
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:39pm
Originally posted by maysay1 maysay1 wrote:

Originally posted by coconess coconess wrote:

she can probably rent on her own.. 
i just feel like money going towards rent.. especially when you have other expenses and things you wanna do.. is extra hard. 

Definitely would be hard. But sometimes you have to buy your peace. If she can find an acceptable roommate situation where she feels safe and can devote her time to school/work and not being emotionally abused, then it could be worth it.

Might have to be unconventional about it though. Find another poor student and share a studio apartment...exchange housing for housekeeping or caregiving...live in an intentional community...buy a van and live in it (lol it could work).

Ouch
i feel like just staying at home and continuing to avoid her mother would be better.. from the OP it sounded like they barely speak… 

almost everything you mentioned sounds dreadful… 
whats your location midna? 



Posted By: browneyez4548
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:39pm
Originally posted by mizzsandra00 mizzsandra00 wrote:

Originally posted by browneyez4548 browneyez4548 wrote:

Originally posted by mizzsandra00 mizzsandra00 wrote:

Originally posted by Ladycoils Ladycoils wrote:

I would talk to a financial aid rep and see if you can file as an independent student. 


This....if you explain you have no contact with your parents and have a few witness write a notarized letter the decision is theirs.....sob that shyt all the way up....verbal abuse iono.....this is what I did and they let me files independent from 22-24


I was gonna suggest this, but she lives with her mom...unless things have changed, that's an auto "no" from the fin aid office


Oh I didn't read the whole thing.....Ouch.....Yeah I didn't live with my parents....I moved out at 18....so I was able to actually show proof I lived on my own in another state.....


Yeah...if she moves out, she would have to be living on her own for at least 6 months and would have to have had 0 contact with mom...each school is different on how they make you prove that, but the notarized statements that you mentioned are standard..and yes...create a sob story LOL

To be 100% honest, having worked in fin aid before...you hear/read so many things about sh*tty parents, you almost become numb to it all....but a sob story helps Lol If you just write some sh*t like "I hate my mom, and she hates me" you will be denied Lol


Posted By: Midna
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:42pm
Originally posted by HunnyB HunnyB wrote:

Some of the more common situations in which financial aid administrators may be willing to override the dependency determination include:
  • Parents incarcerated or presumed dead.

  • Student was sexually or physically abused by the parents or can document a hostile or neglectful relationship with his/her parents. The student will need to provide copies of protection from abuse orders, court documents, social worker reports, doctor reports, police records, and letters from clergy, as appropriate.

  • Parents cannot be located. For example, a student who emigrated to the US without his/her parents, became a US citizen, and has not been able to contact his/her parents (or even know whether they are still alive).

  • Student legally adopted by their current guardian.


I don't know how effective this method will be, but if things ever escalate, I'll record. I can also provide past police reports from the physical abuse. There should also be documents with CPS from when I was a minor.


Posted By: JamCaygirl
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:45pm
Originally posted by coconess coconess wrote:

Originally posted by maysay1 maysay1 wrote:

Originally posted by coconess coconess wrote:

she can probably rent on her own.. 
i just feel like money going towards rent.. especially when you have other expenses and things you wanna do.. is extra hard. 

Definitely would be hard. But sometimes you have to buy your peace. If she can find an acceptable roommate situation where she feels safe and can devote her time to school/work and not being emotionally abused, then it could be worth it.

Might have to be unconventional about it though. Find another poor student and share a studio apartment...exchange housing for housekeeping or caregiving...live in an intentional community...buy a van and live in it (lol it could work).

Ouch
i feel like just staying at home and continuing to avoid her mother would be better.. from the OP it sounded like they barely speak… 

almost everything you mentioned sounds dreadful… 
whats your location midna? 



You have no idea how hard it is to survive in that situation... i moved out and slept on a friends floor for around 8 months all while studying and I never looked back... nothing worse that having your heart sink every night you go home....

Do what you need to do Midna.... you may struggle for a time but for peace of mind and sanity its all worth it....


Posted By: maysay1
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:45pm
Originally posted by Midna Midna wrote:

Originally posted by maysay1 maysay1 wrote:

Originally posted by Midna Midna wrote:

I can't believe I'm saying this but I think I may join job corps. I don't know how positive the outcome will be (I'll make the final decision after plenty of research) but at least the housing and educative environment may be of help and safety.


I have just never heard good things about Job Corps...from people who were there and second hand stories. I'd almost think it'd be better to join a branch of the military.

Is there ANYONE you know who you could live with? A relative, friend, professor, anyone who needs a nanny or elder caregiver in exchange for your housing? I'm sure you probably can't rent on your own, but maybe finding roommates who are in a similar position? I know that opens you up to other sucky possibilities, but maybe it's an option. I've known some people who found great roommates through craigslist (like living with an old lady for like 300$/month who never bothered them).

Are there any public universities you could get into that have dorms? That's also an option, especially in public school systems that have some schools with super low enrollment.


That doesn't surprise me. Dead
I've been asking around while trying to skirt around the reason why but it's hard to because she has already broadcasted her version which is highly biased and exaggerated.

So family is a no go, Africans and respect for elders is huge. However, I have contacted my father and I think in terms of family, he is my best bet. He lives in Ghana however, but if he can help me in any way, he does what he can.

I'm going to be asking friends for any possible help in housing and also looking on craigslist. I feel craigslist is risky, but at this point, I'll insure myself with information and proper documentation.


Craigslist can be risky...but it can also be just fine. It can go either way. I'd definitely reach into your network first...even if it's coworkers, professors, other students, etc. You don't have to be close with a person to live with them. Who knows who might have a spare room just waiting for you.

Also, you may want to check out airbnb and couchsurfing.org (I think that's it). A lot of the same people that post their spaces on there may also be open to long term arrangements. Plus you can read reviews about them.

Obviously, all the regular caveats apply. Don't give out your personal info, make sure to have a written lease, know the tenants/landlord rights in your state, etc. etc.


Posted By: Midna
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:46pm
Originally posted by JamCaygirl JamCaygirl wrote:

Originally posted by coconess coconess wrote:

Originally posted by maysay1 maysay1 wrote:

Originally posted by coconess coconess wrote:

she can probably rent on her own.. 
i just feel like money going towards rent.. especially when you have other expenses and things you wanna do.. is extra hard. 

Definitely would be hard. But sometimes you have to buy your peace. If she can find an acceptable roommate situation where she feels safe and can devote her time to school/work and not being emotionally abused, then it could be worth it.

Might have to be unconventional about it though. Find another poor student and share a studio apartment...exchange housing for housekeeping or caregiving...live in an intentional community...buy a van and live in it (lol it could work).

Ouch
i feel like just staying at home and continuing to avoid her mother would be better.. from the OP it sounded like they barely speak… 

almost everything you mentioned sounds dreadful… 
whats your location midna? 



You have no idea how hard it is to survive in that situation... i moved out and slept on a friends floor for around 8 months all while studying and I never looked back... nothing worse that having your heart sink every night you go home....

Do what you need to do Midna.... you may struggle for a time but for peace of mind and sanity its all worth it....


Thank you so much.. I've reached my limit. I'm trying to use this as motivation to work harder to leave.

It all hurts, but there's no denying I need to leave. I never once rationalized staying for her. I just waited until I gained enough financial power to. If I secure this job I'm getting interviewed for, I know life will get so much better for me. I'll have the power to save well and move out. And even if life is harder out there, at least I'll be free.




Posted By: newdiva1
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:51pm
awww...Midna.  I'm so sorry to hear u go thru this.  I went thru this same thing with my gramma when I wanted to apply to FIDM in L.A. years ago.  I was considered a dependent.  They weren't looking for a co-signer but I needed a reference if i'm remembering correctly.  I remember telling my advisor at the school that my gramma was not going to go for it.  She insisted on speaking with her figuring it wouldn't be a prollem since she didn't have to come out of pocket for anything.

My gramma cussed her out 6 ways from Sunday and that was the end of that dream. I still get embarrassed and hurt when I think about it sometimes.  I remember being upset to the point of crying.  How u harrassing me to do something with my life and to basically get a job or go to school then turn around and Education block me?  This was the 90's so the innernets hadn't been invented yet.  It was way harder (IMO) to get school loan information especially if u had no one who had information on your side and I had no one.

I found out a couple of years ago from an aunt that I wasn't the only one she has "blocked".  I don't want to completely shade my gramma. She can actually be loving but she has another side to her.  she can be mean and vindictive to for no reason...at least no reason that we can see.

I'm sorry I have no advice but luckily the ladies in here have alot more experience with this type of stuff.

I got nuffin'  but Hug


Posted By: coconess
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:53pm
Originally posted by JamCaygirl JamCaygirl wrote:


You have no idea how hard it is to survive in that situation... i moved out and slept on a friends floor for around 8 months all while studying and I never looked back... nothing worse that having your heart sink every night you go home....

Do what you need to do Midna.... you may struggle for a time but for peace of mind and sanity its all worth it....

oh i dont….? 

dont tell me what i know about. 


Posted By: OhMyCurlz
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:58pm
I am going through the same thing. The EXACT same thing. I chose to just leave the house. I couldn't. 

Do you think you can afford a 1 bedroom apt in your area? Do you have credit (sorry to ask)? Getting in an apt can happen in a day as long as you have your ducks in a row. Have you rented before? I wouldn't be in that house any longer if I were you...or I would at least make PLANS to leave. You never want to get into an argument and she's telling you to get out of her house threatening to call the police (even though she tech can't immediately evict you she can make life harder for you). 


Posted By: newdiva1
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:58pm
Originally posted by HunnyB HunnyB wrote:

Independent Student Status

The Federal requirements for  http://www.finaid.org/calculators/dependency.phtml" rel="nofollow - independent student status  changed in 1992. Since then, the student must satisfy at least one of the following criteria to be considered independent:





I think this was my issue.  I remember my adviser mentioning something like having her sign away her parental rights(?) or something like that.  but I found out later that she didn't want to let me do that either because that meant she could no longer claim me on her taxes.


Posted By: JamCaygirl
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 11:01pm
Originally posted by coconess coconess wrote:

Originally posted by JamCaygirl JamCaygirl wrote:


You have no idea how hard it is to survive in that situation... i moved out and slept on a friends floor for around 8 months all while studying and I never looked back... nothing worse that having your heart sink every night you go home....

Do what you need to do Midna.... you may struggle for a time but for peace of mind and sanity its all worth it....

oh i dont….? 

dont tell me what i know about. 


my comment was not stated to offend, i was  merely empathizing with Midna and trying to explain why your suggestion may not be so easy... if you took offense, that's on you, none was meant by me however and I think Midna saw where I was going which is good...


Posted By: coconess
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 11:01pm
you made an assumption when you know nothing about me. 

i wasnt offended.. i merely said dont tell me what i know about. 



Posted By: Midna
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 11:01pm
Originally posted by OhMyCurlz OhMyCurlz wrote:

I am going through the same thing. The EXACT same thing. I chose to just leave the house. I couldn't. 

Do you think you can afford a 1 bedroom apt in your area? Do you have credit (sorry to ask)? Getting in an apt can happen in a day as long as you have your ducks in a row. Have you rented before? I wouldn't be in that house any longer if I were you...or I would at least make PLANS to leave. You never want to get into an argument and she's telling you to get out of her house threatening to call the police (even though she tech can't immediately evict you she can make life harder for you). 


I do have credit.. but I've now put it off to a bad start.

I maxed my credit card out because she couldn't handle my dad helping me so she told me not to ask him for help and she'll pay.

Then the time to pay comes and she doesn't have money. I need my classes so I paid by credit and now I'm just slowly chipping away at the debt.


Posted By: Midna
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 11:03pm
My adulthood is off to a really rocky start.

I can't stop crying..

I'm going to get up and keep moving forward but right now I need to cry everything out.


Posted By: carolina cutie
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 11:05pm
I'm trying to think. I would suggest working 50-11 jobs to save up to move out but with the high COL and low pay for most jobs, it's an uphill climb.Unhappy

All of the young ladies I know that aren't dependent on their parents/family in school have a bf/husband to help take care of them financially instead.

I second going to the finaid office at your school and explaining the situation. They usually work with you but I am not familiar with CC finaid when it comes to dependent/independent status.

Craigslist is good if you must leave the house. Perhaps spend the next weekend or two hitting up fastweb for every scholarship you can.



MidnaHug


Posted By: JamCaygirl
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 11:05pm
Staying in a house where there is any form of abuse, physical or mental is just soul destroying...

Its funny when I tell people all the stuff I went through leading to why I left and never looked back... people will say, "but they raised you" etc....

But if I had been treated that way by a boyfriend I would have gotton, "you need to leave him, he's crazy " etc etc...

Its a hard concept for some people to grasp that just because they are blood relations doesn't mean you have to lie back and take whatever $hit they pour forth


Posted By: newdiva1
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 11:05pm
IA with finding another place to live.  There is nothing like peace of mind. Mom is a vampire...she will continue to emotionally suck on Midna until she has nuffin' left. She sounds like the type that will sabotage her if she thinks she's tryna do better.  Fuccin' sh*t up so u can't have study dates or anything to do with school.  If you're at home and doing school stuff she will make sure u can't concentrate or keep u busy so u can't study.

Midna...don't tell your mother you're moving until folks are there carrying your boxes out to the truck.


Posted By: mizzsandra00
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 11:06pm
Never allow her to not ask your father for help.....its his job......let her be bitter and proud when it affects just her......I hate to say it but you may have to take some time off.....and slowly separate yourself from her so next semester you can file the way you need to.


Posted By: carolina cutie
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 11:07pm
Originally posted by mizzsandra00 mizzsandra00 wrote:

Never allow her to not ask your father for help.....its his job......let her be bitter and proud when it affects just her......I hate to say it but you may have to take some time off.....and slowly separate yourself from her so next semester you can file the way you need to.
You may be onto something.


Posted By: JamCaygirl
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 11:08pm
Originally posted by coconess coconess wrote:

you made an assumption when you know nothing about me. 

i wasnt offended.. i merely said dont tell me what i know about. 



not really, the you was meant to be general, nothwithstanding the fact that I quoted you...


Posted By: JamCaygirl
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 11:10pm
Originally posted by newdiva1 newdiva1 wrote:

IA with finding another place to live.  There is nothing like peace of mind. Mom is a vampire...she will continue to emotionally suck on Midna until she has nuffin' left. She sounds like the type that will sabotage her if she thinks she's tryna do better.  Fuccin' sh*t up so u can't have study dates or anything to do with school.  If you're at home and doing school stuff she will make sure u can't concentrate or keep u busy so u can't study.

Midna...don't tell your mother you're moving until folks are there carrying your boxes out to the truck.



This is exactly what I did...

LAWD

If hell wasnt raised that day it never will be again...


Posted By: coconess
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 11:10pm
oh ok.. you quoted me.. the only person telling her to stay home.. and said 'you have no idea how hard it is to stay in that situation' 

but it was in general.. i see where i got confused… Geek


Posted By: maysay1
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 11:11pm
Originally posted by Midna Midna wrote:

My adulthood is off to a really rocky start.

I can't stop crying..

I'm going to get up and keep moving forward but right now I need to cry everything out.


Cry as much as you need to. Things are off to a rocky start but you have what you need within yourself to make this work.

Work through your emotions as best as you can and then make an emergency plan. Mainly, how will you keep yourself safe, fed, and housed if sh*t hits the fan. At least identify where you can get help in your area (shelters, food banks, etc). Make sure you have all your necessary legal documents (birth certificate, social security card, anything like that) somewhere safe.

Midna, you can totally do this. Cry, scream, whatever you have to do. But know that you can do this.


Posted By: mizzsandra00
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 11:13pm
Midna this is a lesson learned.....If you gotta move into a shoe box and sleep on an air mattress.....it will be so comfortable because its yours and you can do as you please.....trust me.....


Posted By: coconess
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 11:14pm
try to save as much money as you can.. for a rainy day.. just in case you need to leave immediately. 

keep job hunting.. 


Posted By: Midna
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 11:15pm
Originally posted by newdiva1 newdiva1 wrote:

IA with finding another place to live.  There is nothing like peace of mind. Mom is a vampire...she will continue to emotionally suck on Midna until she has nuffin' left. She sounds like the type that will sabotage her if she thinks she's tryna do better.  Fuccin' sh*t up so u can't have study dates or anything to do with school.  If you're at home and doing school stuff she will make sure u can't concentrate or keep u busy so u can't study.

Midna...don't tell your mother you're moving until folks are there carrying your boxes out to the truck.



I WON'T.

That is EXACTLY what she does! I don't tell my mother anything good in my life because she'll either find some way to make me feel like sh*t for it or find some way to impede me. Sometimes it's so bizarre too, she'll start being nice to sabotage me. I did that low carb diet thing and lost 16 pounds in a month and out of nowhere she's buying pizzas, candies, and donuts juuuuust for me and getting angry when I politely reject them. Huh? That's nothing, she has destroyed so much of my schoolwork, conveniently taken away my laptop when I'm studying for finals, and destroyed projects I've worked on. She'll even come into my room, tear it up, leave and yell at me 'for having a messy room.' She's incomprehensible. I think one of the most vindictive was when an employer called me with a job offer after successful interviews, pretended to be me, and insulted the employer and hung up the phone. I only found out a week after from calling the employer and having him tell me "what I said." I tried to tell him it wasn't me but I couldn't salvage the offer since the spot was already filled. She's a soap opera antagonist. Once I even found her hiding my mail and it was a couple of checks from an insurance company to pay for an accident I was not at fault for. I was PISSED.

The day I move out from this place, I think I'll pack my sh*t up overnight and leave by morning. And the only way she'll know I've moved out is a sign on my door saying "I've moved out. Goodbye." followed by an empty room.


Posted By: OhMyCurlz
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 11:24pm
Originally posted by Midna Midna wrote:

Originally posted by OhMyCurlz OhMyCurlz wrote:

I am going through the same thing. The EXACT same thing. I chose to just leave the house. I couldn't. 

Do you think you can afford a 1 bedroom apt in your area? Do you have credit (sorry to ask)? Getting in an apt can happen in a day as long as you have your ducks in a row. Have you rented before? I wouldn't be in that house any longer if I were you...or I would at least make PLANS to leave. You never want to get into an argument and she's telling you to get out of her house threatening to call the police (even though she tech can't immediately evict you she can make life harder for you). 


I do have credit.. but I've now put it off to a bad start.

I maxed my credit card out because she couldn't handle my dad helping me so she told me not to ask him for help and she'll pay.

Then the time to pay comes and she doesn't have money. I need my classes so I paid by credit and now I'm just slowly chipping away at the debt.
OMG it's CRAZY how much I was in a similar situation. I feel like I'm talking to myself 3 months ago. I'm so sorry you are going through this. There is nothing more hurtful than your mom WANTING you not to succeed. Doing everything in their power to make it harder for you. Cry

Do you think that you should just take it slow with your schooling? My class is graduating in May....I HATE that I am "behind" but the reality is that taking it slow is best so you DONT get overwhelmed and in debt. This is your LIFE, school is about 4 years out of your life. For us, when we aren't in school it feels like we are wasting our lives away. It's depressing and infuriating, but you have to think smart. 

You need time to get yourself together. The worse mistakes are the ones made in desperation. 

Go look for an apt, you probably know this but most want you to make 3 times the rent, they will check your credit...most will approve you if you have SOME credit with conditions...that may be a larger deposit or higher rent. You are 22, the last person you lived with was your mom. Most places want to know that you will pay rent on time. If you haven't lived anywhere but your moms house, ask SOMEBODY who wont screw you over to be your "land lord". A grandma is best. That's important because if you are just a "student" without any rental history they are going to want you to have a cosigner (ie: your momma). I hate to say it, but I found out the hard way that the system doesn't really help those who are 'in the middle' or a rock and a hard place and when you are trying to get out of a sh*tty situation, not everyone sympathizes. 






Posted By: mizzsandra00
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 11:24pm
Im petty Id be throwing her important shyt in a thrash daily.......wallet car keys bills favorite blouse.......little by little....make her think she's crazy....play dumb......


Posted By: coconess
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 11:29pm
id be the same way sandra… except i wouldnt play dumb for half of it. 

ive broke her shiit in front of her. important shiit. 

i couldnt... 
im a fighter. call it disrespectful if you want.  


Posted By: JamCaygirl
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 11:29pm
Midna are there any friends, coworkers, associates you know who might be willing to help you out until you get on your feet?

Is joining the military an option?


Posted By: OhMyCurlz
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 11:33pm
My mom threatened to tell the police I was involved in a prostitution ring and was selling drugs. 

She poured cooking oil on my clothes threw my supplies away, she's done horrible things. 

I dont have the desire to fight with crazy. Crazy never gets tired of fighting...I just left and gave it to God.


Posted By: newdiva1
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 11:36pm
Originally posted by mizzsandra00 mizzsandra00 wrote:

Midna this is a lesson learned.....If you gotta move into a shoe box and sleep on an air mattress.....it will be so comfortable because its yours and you can do as you please.....trust me.....




yup.


Posted By: JamCaygirl
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 11:42pm
Crazy people really cant be helped, even had me doubting my own sanity, like am I crazy? is this normal?


Posted By: newdiva1
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 11:42pm
Originally posted by Midna Midna wrote:

Originally posted by newdiva1 newdiva1 wrote:

IA with finding another place to live.  There is nothing like peace of mind. Mom is a vampire...she will continue to emotionally suck on Midna until she has nuffin' left. She sounds like the type that will sabotage her if she thinks she's tryna do better.  Fuccin' sh*t up so u can't have study dates or anything to do with school.  If you're at home and doing school stuff she will make sure u can't concentrate or keep u busy so u can't study.

Midna...don't tell your mother you're moving until folks are there carrying your boxes out to the truck.



I WON'T.

That is EXACTLY what she does! I don't tell my mother anything good in my life because she'll either find some way to make me feel like sh*t for it or find some way to impede me. Sometimes it's so bizarre too, she'll start being nice to sabotage me. I did that low carb diet thing and lost 16 pounds in a month and out of nowhere she's buying pizzas, candies, and donuts juuuuust for me and getting angry when I politely reject them. Huh? That's nothing, she has destroyed so much of my schoolwork, conveniently taken away my laptop when I'm studying for finals, and destroyed projects I've worked on. She'll even come into my room, tear it up, leave and yell at me 'for having a messy room.' She's incomprehensible. I think one of the most vindictive was when an employer called me with a job offer after successful interviews, pretended to be me, and insulted the employer and hung up the phone. I only found out a week after from calling the employer and having him tell me "what I said." I tried to tell him it wasn't me but I couldn't salvage the offer since the spot was already filled. She's a soap opera antagonist. Once I even found her hiding my mail and it was a couple of checks from an insurance company to pay for an accident I was not at fault for. I was PISSED.

The day I move out from this place, I think I'll pack my sh*t up overnight and leave by morning. And the only way she'll know I've moved out is a sign on my door saying "I've moved out. Goodbye." followed by an empty room.




start packing sh*t on the low if u can. pack sh*t and hide the boxes...preferably over a comrade's house.  it's gone be trouble if she even get's a wif of u tryna get the fucc out.  U gotta do this like you're leaving an abusive relationship with a man.  do u have anyone who would be willing to hold your boxes until u move? 

i'm mad I don't live in the same city as u.  U would be coming the fucc over to my house.


Posted By: coconess
Date Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 11:42pm
im switching over to team Leave… if its messing with your sanity. 

i didnt know it was that crazy.. the OP says that yall dont talk besides a text every blue moon.. to not have problems or something.. i was thinking there was very minimal interaction. 




Posted By: Midna
Date Posted: Apr 18 2014 at 1:05am
Everyone, I feel so much better. The tears are gone.

I feel so refreshed and I finally am finished crying. I just finished an hour-long discussion with my father and our discussion went into such depth, I got to vent out everything to which he surprisingly understood and sympathized with.

My father is going to help me out. There's a good chance I'll be living with my brother in Las Vegas as a result.

So the medical and billing thing in my valley is likely out of the blueprint for now but I'm getting out of here.

Vegas is quite the drastic move so I may still stay in California but find another place, but I have such a renewed sense of optimism from everyone's words here and the help of my father.

Everyone.. I thank you from the bottom of my heart..


Posted By: sexyandfamous
Date Posted: Apr 18 2014 at 1:06am
^^^^lol, just saw what you wrote. good to hear!!!!!Smile


Posted By: newdiva1
Date Posted: Apr 18 2014 at 1:12am
That is wonderful...as long as you're gettin' out.  Errything will fall into place.Hug


Posted By: f8dagrate
Date Posted: Apr 18 2014 at 7:18am
Please give us an update! I'm not wealthy.. yet but I do have some suggestions if you would like some. PM anytime loveHeart


Posted By: SimplyPut
Date Posted: Apr 18 2014 at 7:56am
Didn't read the entire thread, so I don't know if this has already been said, but you can petition to be an independent student. I worked in financial aid and admissions as an undergrad and had people do it all the time. If you have someone else's address you can put down, you can have them write a letter saying you live with them and provide all support for yourself and show proof of employment and the stuff you pay on your own. The tricky thing is your mother would have to write a letter agreeing that you support yourself. Do you think she would be willing to do that?

There is always the option of using your father. I'm not sure how your relationship is with him, but if you can get him to complete your FASFA it would be a lot easier, and it'll update the information yearly when he files.


Posted By: Samoneisthebest
Date Posted: Apr 18 2014 at 8:26am
D'aaaawwww a happy ending thread Heart


Posted By: nekamarie83
Date Posted: Apr 18 2014 at 8:38am
Originally posted by f8dagrate f8dagrate wrote:

Please give us an update! I'm not wealthy.. yet but I do have some suggestions if you would like some. PM anytime loveHeart
All this and apologies that it's gone this far. I hope that you & your father coordinate something to get you out of there on your own or relocated to your brother.

Keep us posted and drop a paypal link on us if some of the sisters can slide you at least a lil something to help out.


Posted By: mzsophisticated
Date Posted: Apr 18 2014 at 10:23am
Omg i could not imagine going through what u are enduring ..i think u may have to temp stop school to get a game plan to move out. Do u have any coworkers, close friends or family that canhelp u move immediately while u get ur self together to afford housing on your own?


Posted By: JasmineE02
Date Posted: Apr 18 2014 at 10:27am
I'm glad things are better. Hug  


Posted By: SoutherNtellect
Date Posted: Apr 18 2014 at 10:28am
Originally posted by Samoneisthebest Samoneisthebest wrote:

D'aaaawwww a happy ending thread Heart

Cry


Posted By: sugabanana
Date Posted: Apr 18 2014 at 10:52am
So are we chipping in to get Midna out to Vegas or what my people????


Posted By: Tbaby
Date Posted: Apr 18 2014 at 10:56am
I"m glad your dad is going to help you out.  Your mother sounds so awful, it's terrible what you had to live thru.  Hope things will be better from now on.


Posted By: Starrygurl
Date Posted: Apr 18 2014 at 12:49pm
Pm me anytime. I'm almost in the same situation as you. Without fa I wouldn't be in college. Midna aww glad it's gonna work out for you.Heart


Posted By: Cream1970
Date Posted: Apr 18 2014 at 12:55pm
I didn't read all of the responses, so this may have been said already.
 
If a person is:
under 24
haven't been married
don't have any children
not a veteran
hasn't been a foster child/adopted/ward of the court
 
They are considered to be "dependent" according to the guideline of the Dept of Ed., regardless if they moved out at 16 and totally support themselves.
 
Buuuut, just because a parent fills out and signs a "Parent Plus" application, doesn't mean they'll be co-signing on any loans. At a career/trade school 90% of parents are declined and even if they are approved, just filling out the app and running it doesn't mean they're on any loans.
Regardless if they're approved or not, a dependent student must provide the parent's tax returns to be used for the FAFSA app.
 
I speak to a lot of parents who refuse to "be on" their child's FA. I explain to them to let us at least check, it's a good chance they will be declined. They usually are, and all of the loans are in the student's name, but we have to have the parent's income tax return to complete the FAFSA and have them sign the Parent Plus form to see.
 
Not the school's rules, that's a Dept of Ed rule.
 
Every now and then you can get a Professional Judgment, if the parent is in or has been incarcerated and there is proof that the parent is MIA.


Posted By: carolina cutie
Date Posted: Apr 18 2014 at 1:04pm
Yay MidnaHeart


Posted By: Cream1970
Date Posted: Apr 18 2014 at 1:04pm
Originally posted by SimplyPut SimplyPut wrote:

Didn't read the entire thread, so I don't know if this has already been said, but you can petition to be an independent student. I worked in financial aid and admissions as an undergrad and had people do it all the time. If you have someone else's address you can put down, you can have them write a letter saying you live with them and provide all support for yourself and show proof of employment and the stuff you pay on your own. The tricky thing is your mother would have to write a letter agreeing that you support yourself. Do you think she would be willing to do that?

would be a lot easier, and it'll update the information yearly when he files.
The Dept of Ed and the IRS are in bed together. Please know that anything you put on your FAFSA is subject to verification and they may ask for receipts.
 
A parent can't claim a dependent child for years, then flip it and say that they didn't support them when it's time to do a FAFSA. I mean, they can, but just be aware that it can come back to bite you in the rear.


Posted By: Lonisha87
Date Posted: Apr 18 2014 at 1:22pm
girl she sounds like he devil. Damn. Let me read the whole thread though


Posted By: MsBMW
Date Posted: Apr 18 2014 at 2:45pm
Midna it's going to be okay your BHM family is here..PM me if you need to talk
I have been on my own since I was 17 I know the struggle 



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