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I WAS ATTACKED LAST NIGHT!

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Printed Date: Nov 17 2017 at 11:19pm


Topic: I WAS ATTACKED LAST NIGHT!
Posted By: ExotiqBeautii
Subject: I WAS ATTACKED LAST NIGHT!
Date Posted: Jun 15 2013 at 2:15am
I know this is not the right thread to post this in, so if someone can please help guide me to the right forum, that would be very helpful. But here's my story:

I'm currently redoing my 6 year old's room over while all of my kids are spending the summer at their grandparent out of town. My husband works for the US ARMY and is currently deployed, so I'm home by myself. I'm planning on surprising her when they returned home in August. I stay up late until the wee hours working on this project, because I'm building her bed from scratch and amongst other things (painting, reorganizing, etc).

Thursday morning,  I was still working on it, and I had only eaten a sandwich for the day and began to get hungry again. At about 1:45, I decided to get something to eat. I didn't have anything to eat in the house, and I live in a suburb area and all the stores and restaurants close early,  so I chose to go downtown (Augusta, GA on Broad St.) to a restaurant that stays open until 4 am. I got downtown around 2 am, and realized that the restaurant was closed for the morning. I didn't know their late hours only happened during the weekend, so I decided to go a few blocks down the street to check out the bars for an appetizer.

I saw three men talking outside near the bar and one of the men with a backpack on (a homeless looking older gentleman) asked me for $2, but I told him I only had my debit card on me. The one in a white t-shirt told me I should never walk alone downtown by myself this late I night.   Stupidly, I shrugged it off and continued walking. I saw that although there were still patrons inside, both bars were closing down for the morning, so I began walking back to my car. Passing by the men again, I looked in the opposite direction to avoid conversation.

The third man was wearing a wife beater tank top, and although I didn't know it at the time, he was following me. I just thought he was walking to the bar a block down and across the street, because it was still open as well. I heard him describing to someone on the phone, what street he was currently on, but didn't really pay attention to what he was saying, until thinking about it later on. I always unlock my car when I'm about 20 feet away, just for safety precautions. I climbed in my SUV, closed the door and started the ignition.

Immediately after that, the man in the wife beater opened my driver's side door, and said something to me, but I couldn't hear because of the music, so I turned my stereo down. He then said, "Give me all your money!" I smelled alcohol on his breath, so I just thought he was drunk and tried to push him away to close my door.  I told him no, i don't have any cash, and that I only had a debit card. With his left hand gripped on to my door, he resisted my push and became angry. Next, he said, "Then you need to give up your debit card and the pin number! Don't play with me, because I will assault you!" Again, I said no and pushed him away knocking his phone out of his hand, and instantly, he began to punch me in my head over and over, and demanded me to scoot over to the passenger's side seat.

I was taught to never go with someone when they are trying to take you away from your environment; that will only raise your chances of getting murdered. I refused his request and he began punching me again. This entire time, I screamed for help, but no one came. I saw an opening between his body and the door, so I dashed through him and began running down the street. I was wearing flip flops, so I kicked them off because they were making me run slower. In that instant he reached for me and grabbed my hair and pulled me back. I only got away for a brief second, because he then grabbed my jumper pant suit and ripped my clothes off. He then pushed me to the floor and continued to kick and punch me on my back, legs, arms, neck, and head. Trying to cover myself up, I wasn't able to protect my body at the same time.

I heard a few people coming up the street and yelling, but I couldn't make out what they were saying. After getting up, I saw the man running to my vehicle and one of the good Samaritans threw his beer bottle, aiming for the guy whom attacked me. He missed him and hit my car instead, so he ran to my vehicle and attempted to pull the man out, but was unsuccessful. The man hit my car in reverse and sped off down the street.

One of the detectives on the scene found his cellphone on the ground next to where I had parked. I was out there for a few hours, while the people that helped me, stood around giving their statements as witnesses. During this time, I noticed that the man in the white t shirt was walking towards the officer that was speaking to me. He told the officer he "kind of" knew the man whom attacked me. In the black ghetto community, I know you're not supposed to snitch, so I knew he was contemplating whether or not he should give the man's true identity to the officer, but he ended up telling him the truth, that he knew exactly who he was and that he knew where he stayed, and for that, I'm thankful for. He told the officer that he saw his friend running up to me, but didn't know he was going to attack me.

Afterwards the officer that noticed a cellphone with the back part and battery next to the phone. He asked if I was parked here, and I told him it was. Later on, the detective told me right when he put the phone back together, that his mom had called it. The detective answered and said they were investigating a shooting and that they think her son was shot because they found his phone. They told her to call them as soon as her son returned home so that they can confirm whether it was him or not, so she wouldn't know about the incident that happened and would try to help him escape. Sure enough about 2-3 hours later, they received a call from her telling them that her son just walked through the door and that he looked okay. They went to his house immediately and arrested him.

The detective later told me that he found my car, and that it was dumped in a "Sketchy" neighborhood. I went to the hospital where they checked me out, and prescribe me pain killers and muscle relaxers. I was being watched over that night, because I came out with only a swollen face and neck and a sore body. There were no broken or fractured bones, and the doctor said I was surprisingly okay, and I would be hurting over the next week or so while I recovered, but that was it!

He took a few high valued items out of my car and turned it inside out (Everything was scattered everywhere, but the most important thing to me, my life, he did not take.

I'm telling this to you all, because i want you to be safe, aware, and cautious wherever you go, day or night. Yes, I unlock my door before getting to my vehicle, but my mistake was, I didn't lock my door afterwards. I'm happy that this happened to me, because I was not scared and I fought off my assailant. GOD put him in my life for a reason, because the way he was so comfortable with the situation, I'm almost sure that he's done it before and would've did it again. I possibly saved someone's life in the future, because if he were to do it again, he probably would've taken it a step further.

Yes, I'm in excruciating pain, but it does not take away the happiness I feel in my heart, that I was not permanently brain damaged, in a coma, or dead. I went to the store close by my house tonight at about ten, and I swear I kept thinking he was out there and was waiting to attack me again, even though I know he's in jail. I'm jumpy now, and every time I go outside, my heart starts beating fast. When I got in my car last night for the first time since the incident, I locked my door four different times before I got to the store, and the drive is only about 2 minutes from my house. I can't stop myself from doing these things even though I try. I keep looking out the windows and before I open my front door, I check multiple times before going outside. I spent hours shaking uncontrollably. I'm suspicious of every car and person now, because i keep thinking it's him, but I can't stop myself from thinking this way and it really sucks. I'm really paranoid and I just want to stay inside now, but I know i can't let him control my life. Please pray for me!

I want to share my story with every one, and to educate those whom are vulnerable. The news channel contacted me, and asked to interview me for a story, and I am more than happy to do the interview. I want to get my story out to as many people as I can, because I want everyone to know the dangers that are out there, and that it can happen to anyone. I would really appreciate it if you all would share my story.Thank you for reading, and I'm blessed to get this opportunity to share with you all.

Special thanks to Josh, Sadie, and Emily, the one's whom helped me the most that night and saved my life.



Replies:
Posted By: 510QUEEN
Date Posted: Jun 15 2013 at 2:37am
Originally posted by ExotiqBeautii ExotiqBeautii wrote:

I know this is not the right thread to post this in, so if someone can please help guide me to the right forum, that would be very helpful. But here's my story:

I'm currently redoing my 6 year old's room over while all of my kids are spending the summer at their grandparent out of town. My husband works for the US ARMY and is currently deployed, so I'm home by myself. I'm planning on surprising her when they returned home in August. I stay up late until the wee hours working on this project, because I'm building her bed from scratch and amongst other things (painting, reorganizing, etc).

Thursday morning,  I was still working on it, and I had only eaten a sandwich for the day and began to get hungry again. At about 1:45, I decided to get something to eat. I didn't have anything to eat in the house, and I live in a suburb area and all the stores and restaurants close early,  so I chose to go downtown (Augusta, GA on Broad St.) to a restaurant that stays open until 4 am. I got downtown around 2 am, and realized that the restaurant was closed for the morning. I didn't know their late hours only happened during the weekend, so I decided to go a few blocks down the street to check out the bars for an appetizer.

I saw three men talking outside near the bar and one of the men with a backpack on (a homeless looking older gentleman) asked me for $2, but I told him I only had my debit card on me. The one in a white t-shirt told me I should never walk alone downtown by myself this late I night.   Stupidly, I shrugged it off and continued walking. I saw that although there were still patrons inside, both bars were closing down for the morning, so I began walking back to my car. Passing by the men again, I looked in the opposite direction to avoid conversation.

The third man was wearing a wife beater tank top, and although I didn't know it at the time, he was following me. I just thought he was walking to the bar a block down and across the street, because it was still open as well. I heard him describing to someone on the phone, what street he was currently on, but didn't really pay attention to what he was saying, until thinking about it later on. I always unlock my car when I'm about 20 feet away, just for safety precautions. I climbed in my SUV, closed the door and started the ignition.

Immediately after that, the man in the wife beater opened my driver's side door, and said something to me, but I couldn't hear because of the music, so I turned my stereo down. He then said, "Give me all your money!" I smelled alcohol on his breath, so I just thought he was drunk and tried to push him away to close my door.  I told him no, i don't have any cash, and that I only had a debit card. With his left hand gripped on to my door, he resisted my push and became angry. Next, he said, "Then you need to give up your debit card and the pin number! Don't play with me, because I will assault you!" Again, I said no and pushed him away knocking his phone out of his hand, and instantly, he began to punch me in my head over and over, and demanded me to scoot over to the passenger's side seat.

I was taught to never go with someone when they are trying to take you away from your environment; that will only raise your chances of getting murdered. I refused his request and he began punching me again. This entire time, I screamed for help, but no one came. I saw an opening between his body and the door, so I dashed through him and began running down the street. I was wearing flip flops, so I kicked them off because they were making me run slower. In that instant he reached for me and grabbed my hair and pulled me back. I only got away for a brief second, because he then grabbed my jumper pant suit and ripped my clothes off. He then pushed me to the floor and continued to kick and punch me on my back, legs, arms, neck, and head. Trying to cover myself up, I wasn't able to protect my body at the same time.

I heard a few people coming up the street and yelling, but I couldn't make out what they were saying. After getting up, I saw the man running to my vehicle and one of the good Samaritans threw his beer bottle, aiming for the guy whom attacked me. He missed him and hit my car instead, so he ran to my vehicle and attempted to pull the man out, but was unsuccessful. The man hit my car in reverse and sped off down the street.

One of the detectives on the scene found his cellphone on the ground next to where I had parked. I was out there for a few hours, while the people that helped me, stood around giving their statements as witnesses. During this time, I noticed that the man in the white t shirt was walking towards the officer that was speaking to me. He told the officer he "kind of" knew the man whom attacked me. In the black ghetto community, I know you're not supposed to snitch, so I knew he was contemplating whether or not he should give the man's true identity to the officer, but he ended up telling him the truth, that he knew exactly who he was and that he knew where he stayed, and for that, I'm thankful for. He told the officer that he saw his friend running up to me, but didn't know he was going to attack me.

Afterwards the officer that noticed a cellphone with the back part and battery next to the phone. He asked if I was parked here, and I told him it was. Later on, the detective told me right when he put the phone back together, that his mom had called it. The detective answered and said they were investigating a shooting and that they think her son was shot because they found his phone. They told her to call them as soon as her son returned home so that they can confirm whether it was him or not, so she wouldn't know about the incident that happened and would try to help him escape. Sure enough about 2-3 hours later, they received a call from her telling them that her son just walked through the door and that he looked okay. They went to his house immediately and arrested him.

The detective later told me that he found my car, and that it was dumped in a "Sketchy" neighborhood. I went to the hospital where they checked me out, and prescribe me pain killers and muscle relaxers. I was being watched over that night, because I came out with only a swollen face and neck and a sore body. There were no broken or fractured bones, and the doctor said I was surprisingly okay, and I would be hurting over the next week or so while I recovered, but that was it!

He took a few high valued items out of my car and turned it inside out (Everything was scattered everywhere, but the most important thing to me, my life, he did not take.

I'm telling this to you all, because i want you to be safe, aware, and cautious wherever you go, day or night. Yes, I unlock my door before getting to my vehicle, but my mistake was, I didn't lock my door afterwards. I'm happy that this happened to me, because I was not scared and I fought off my assailant. GOD put him in my life for a reason, because the way he was so comfortable with the situation, I'm almost sure that he's done it before and would've did it again. I possibly saved someone's life in the future, because if he were to do it again, he probably would've taken it a step further.

Yes, I'm in excruciating pain, but it does not take away the happiness I feel in my heart, that I was not permanently brain damaged, in a coma, or dead. I went to the store close by my house tonight at about ten, and I swear I kept thinking he was out there and was waiting to attack me again, even though I know he's in jail. I'm jumpy now, and every time I go outside, my heart starts beating fast. When I got in my car last night for the first time since the incident, I locked my door four different times before I got to the store, and the drive is only about 2 minutes from my house. I can't stop myself from doing these things even though I try. I keep looking out the windows and before I open my front door, I check multiple times before going outside. I spent hours shaking uncontrollably. I'm suspicious of every car and person now, because i keep thinking it's him, but I can't stop myself from thinking this way and it really sucks. I'm really paranoid and I just want to stay inside now, but I know i can't let him control my life. Please pray for me!

I want to share my story with every one, and to educate those whom are vulnerable. The news channel contacted me, and asked to interview me for a story, and I am more than happy to do the interview. I want to get my story out to as many people as I can, because I want everyone to know the dangers that are out there, and that it can happen to anyone. I would really appreciate it if you all would share my story.Thank you for reading, and I'm blessed to get this opportunity to share with you all.

Special thanks to Josh, Sadie, and Emily, the one's whom helped me the most that night and saved my life.


Posted By: 510QUEEN
Date Posted: Jun 15 2013 at 2:38am
Glad you're safe post this in ttt and stay in the house!


Posted By: Prazol60
Date Posted: Jun 15 2013 at 2:50am
Interesting. I thought everybody locked their car doors after carjacking got popular in the 90's.


Posted By: shantel75
Date Posted: Jun 15 2013 at 2:50am
Hi Girlie. I'm sorry this happened to you, but THANK GOD for his mercy and the fact that you made it out of this situation alive and safe. I hope you feel better soon.

Thanks for sharing. Hugs.


Posted By: danieb23
Date Posted: Jun 15 2013 at 5:32am
Poor baby!!! When you said he started pulling off your clothes I started crying!
I'm glad you are ok, I can only imagine your fear!!
&& I know It doesn't help that hubby is away, but be strong untill he returns and please be careful!

God Bless, and thank GOD you are alive!!


Posted By: GphiD08
Date Posted: Jun 15 2013 at 5:42am
HugHug I'm so Glad you are ok.... When I was in undergrad, my friend told me about a similar story that happened to her and ever since then I'm always extra cautious when locking my doors especially when I'm alone...

Stay safe chica and seek counseling for PTSD because you don't want to be afraid every time you step out of your house.


Posted By: sugabanana
Date Posted: Jun 15 2013 at 7:42am
I thank God that you are safe and he was arrested. I almost always lock my car as second nature. I lived in ny and while in taxis the doors can swing open at anytime. That just stuck in my head. Car's no automatically lock once you pull off. OP sorry this happened to you. Crazy things and people lurk in the middle of the night just waiting to prey on innocent people.


Posted By: india100
Date Posted: Jun 15 2013 at 7:57am

I use to live in Augusta next door to the masters . My friend Alan owns Downtown Pawn shop . The side of his building in what looks like a empty place offers drunks , addicts, and hookers a place to hang out . The police are fully aware . Once you past the James Brown tribute area things really get dangerous . I never went down town late at night after i saw so many crimes . Thank God you are ok . Take a self defense class . Ask God to take the mental burden off your mind .



Posted By: morenaloca
Date Posted: Jun 15 2013 at 8:03am
prazol60 dont be an assshole.

I'm glad your are safe, chica. We as women are easy targets when we are alone. I hope you seek counselling because this is a very traumatic experience. Take care


Posted By: NARSAddict
Date Posted: Jun 15 2013 at 8:13am
Hug
I am so happy that you are okay.  Like previous posters said, get counseling and take a self-defense class so you can feel empowered. 


Posted By: TexasPearl22
Date Posted: Jun 15 2013 at 8:28am
You're safe and alive!!!!Hug


Posted By: harley_quinn
Date Posted: Jun 15 2013 at 8:51am
Girl I carry a stun gun that looks like a cell phone, you can also purchase some mace and keep it on your key chain. Another thing you can do is scratch someone in the face with your keys.

I'm happy that guy was caught, I would be traumatized and paranoid if I experienced something like that.


Posted By: oh_so_moody
Date Posted: Jun 15 2013 at 9:00am
God protected you.

Im so sorry you had to deal with this but Glory be to God you are here to tell the story.

I'll pray for you and be sure you don't allow this incident to take your peace of mind   

Get some type of protection. I have a police grrade stun gun and am seeking my gun license in my current state of residence.

Protect yourself!


Posted By: *SkolarStar*
Date Posted: Jun 15 2013 at 12:23pm
I'm SO grateful that you are alive and healthy to tell your story. Continue to pray and trust God that He will heal you mentally just as He is healing you physically. I love the idea of taking a self defense class. It will help you feel empowered. Hug


Posted By: Brjasuga51
Date Posted: Jun 15 2013 at 12:46pm
Hug I am glad you are okay. Get help if needs be to get over your experience.


Posted By: Jessica90
Date Posted: Jun 15 2013 at 1:06pm
I am so glad that you are okay. I'm always so nervous being out at night time especially when I'm by myself .. My doors lock once I drive off but I always make a habit of just locking them as soon as I get into my car and just checking my surroundings so im always alert. Thanks again for sharing your story...


Posted By: ms.blue
Date Posted: Jun 15 2013 at 1:29pm
Thank God you made it out alive w/o being raped (as I was reafing, I got nervous that it will turn to that). I'm glad that the creep was caught but hopefully you would walk around with pepper spray to protect yourself if you ever go out late like that.


Posted By: LadyAradia
Date Posted: Jun 15 2013 at 1:30pm
I stay in the house after dark and always lock my doors the second I get in. I would NOT have walked down the street alone at night with homeless people there. I learned that lesson when I was 15. Ugh.. Oh well you live and you learn Glad you survived the attack.


Posted By: brittsemone
Date Posted: Jun 15 2013 at 1:56pm
Oh my word.
I am so glad that you are okay! My goodness...I can only imagine how beyond frightening that was.
Thank you for sharing this. I always lock my doors after I get in the car, but I have noticed the past few days that I was being a little careless with it..thinking it would be alright. Definitely learning from your experience.

Hug


Posted By: ExotiqBeautii
Date Posted: Jun 15 2013 at 3:32pm
Thank you all for your responses. I will be taking extra precautions now. To the girl that said "I thought everyone locks their doors after the 90's" I'm really hurt by that statement. Not everyone does, and I'm trying to help those people who don't. I really don't need the sarcasm right now, as I'm seeking support here, not someone scolding me! I know i was not smart by not locking my door instantly, and I'm learning from my own experience. Thank you for the advice guys. I will be seeking counceling. I'm going to spend the weekend at my dad's house in Atlanta, so I can be around loved ones while I recover. What's crazy, is that 2 weeks before this incident, I was in Walmart and saw a booth where they were selling pepper spray for breast cancer awareness. I was going to buy one, but changed my mind. And week later, I went to my dad's house and a guy standing outside the corner store tried to sell me perfume, but I told him I was allergic to fragrance sprays. He then tried to sell me a stun gun and I declined his offer. I also have a gun in the house (Registered, of course), and although my husband took me to the shooting range, I'm afraid of firearms. I don't believe in murder, and although it would be self defense, I couldn't live with knowing I killed a man, if it ever came to that. My husband told me if I ever do use a weapon to be extra careful, because the person can easily take it away and use it on me instead. I will figure something out though, and the self defense classes are a great start. Again, thank you to all of you, and please be safe out there!


Posted By: natalie2u
Date Posted: Jun 15 2013 at 4:02pm
Ooh EB your story makes me wanna cry.Not just because of the trauma you endured,but also tears of joy in how you're dealing with it and using the experience as a teaching tool.Talk about making lemonade out of lemons! I'm so glad they got that thieving,non caring about life asshole! I'm so happy it turned out ok for you and so glad your kids have their Mom to come back to.Heart

Girl on a lighter note,go buy some groceries!!!..I kid,just happy you're ok.



Posted By: keelolo1
Date Posted: Jun 15 2013 at 4:53pm
Thank the Lord you are okay.


Posted By: JoliePoufiasse
Date Posted: Jun 15 2013 at 5:10pm
So glad you made it ok!!! And your testimony is a really good reminder to all of us out there to take precautions. Do seek counselling, though. PTSD is real and it can wreak havoc when left untreated. I know a little something about that...


Posted By: LynnNyc
Date Posted: Jun 15 2013 at 5:29pm
What a horrid experience... don't be hurt about that statement. I've been guilty of that, not locking my doors right away. While I'll unlock it as I approach, and my vehicle only unlocks the drivers door, I sometimes do not lock the door immediately, but get distracted, fiddling with the mirror, the radio, or something in the vehicle.  I thank you for sharing your story because as of today I will NEVER do that again.  You are a sweet soul, indeed, because I have to admit, you come after me, and I had to shoot you in self-defense and you died, I would not have a problem living with that.  Thanks again for sharing, and may everyone learn from your experience.  You got angels on your shoulders.


Posted By: Guidette
Date Posted: Jun 15 2013 at 5:44pm
Originally posted by Prazol60 Prazol60 wrote:

Interesting. I thought everybody locked their car doors after carjacking got popular in the 90's.



This .Im sorry this happen to u but when i get in my car first thing I do is lock the door as im going in it .He wouldn't been able to get in yur car..


Posted By: MizzMizzy
Date Posted: Jun 15 2013 at 5:48pm
GLAD YOU ARE SAFE!


Posted By: WhitWhit86
Date Posted: Jun 15 2013 at 5:53pm
I'm so glad ur okay, and I hate this happen to u! I will be praying for you


Posted By: toosexy1
Date Posted: Jun 16 2013 at 7:41pm
Originally posted by ExotiqBeautii ExotiqBeautii wrote:

Thank you all for your responses. I will be taking extra precautions now. To the girl that said "I thought everyone locks their doors after the 90's" I'm really hurt by that statement. Not everyone does, and I'm trying to help those people who don't. I really don't need the sarcasm right now, as I'm seeking support here, not someone scolding me! I know i was not smart by not locking my door instantly, and I'm learning from my own experience. Thank you for the advice guys. I will be seeking counceling. I'm going to spend the weekend at my dad's house in Atlanta, so I can be around loved ones while I recover. What's crazy, is that 2 weeks before this incident, I was in Walmart and saw a booth where they were selling pepper spray for breast cancer awareness. I was going to buy one, but changed my mind. And week later, I went to my dad's house and a guy standing outside the corner store tried to sell me perfume, but I told him I was allergic to fragrance sprays. He then tried to sell me a stun gun and I declined his offer. I also have a gun in the house (Registered, of course), and although my husband took me to the shooting range, I'm afraid of firearms. I don't believe in murder, and although it would be self defense, I couldn't live with knowing I killed a man, if it ever came to that. My husband told me if I ever do use a weapon to be extra careful, because the person can easily take it away and use it on me instead. I will figure something out though, and the self defense classes are a great start. Again, thank you to all of you, and please be safe out there!
this is what im scared of. im so glad you're alive. to some posters, this is not the time to point fingers/throw stones/make accusations/make snarky(smartass) remarks.


Posted By: WhitWhit86
Date Posted: Jun 16 2013 at 8:59pm
Originally posted by toosexy1 toosexy1 wrote:

Originally posted by ExotiqBeautii ExotiqBeautii wrote:

Thank you all for your responses. I will be taking extra precautions now. To the girl that said "I thought everyone locks their doors after the 90's" I'm really hurt by that statement. Not everyone does, and I'm trying to help those people who don't. I really don't need the sarcasm right now, as I'm seeking support here, not someone scolding me! I know i was not smart by not locking my door instantly, and I'm learning from my own experience. Thank you for the advice guys. I will be seeking counceling. I'm going to spend the weekend at my dad's house in Atlanta, so I can be around loved ones while I recover. What's crazy, is that 2 weeks before this incident, I was in Walmart and saw a booth where they were selling pepper spray for breast cancer awareness. I was going to buy one, but changed my mind. And week later, I went to my dad's house and a guy standing outside the corner store tried to sell me perfume, but I told him I was allergic to fragrance sprays. He then tried to sell me a stun gun and I declined his offer. I also have a gun in the house (Registered, of course), and although my husband took me to the shooting range, I'm afraid of firearms. I don't believe in murder, and although it would be self defense, I couldn't live with knowing I killed a man, if it ever came to that. My husband told me if I ever do use a weapon to be extra careful, because the person can easily take it away and use it on me instead. I will figure something out though, and the self defense classes are a great start. Again, thank you to all of you, and please be safe out there!
this is what im scared of. im so glad you're alive. to some posters, this is not the time to point fingers/throw stones/make accusations/make snarky(smartass) remarks.



My thoughts exactly!!


Posted By: Nigerian_princess
Date Posted: Jun 16 2013 at 10:00pm
Originally posted by Guidette Guidette wrote:

Originally posted by Prazol60 Prazol60 wrote:

Interesting. I thought everybody locked their car doors after carjacking got popular in the 90's.




This .Im sorry this happen to u but when i get in my car first thing I do is lock the door as im going in it .He wouldn't been able to get in yur car..
Take your shoulda coulda woulda's elsewhere

OP I'm so glad your safe. And your story is definitely going to stay with me. I'm guilty of not locking my door when I get in the car. Never again. Sending you love and light as you try to get through this. Stay strong!!


Posted By: naturesgift
Date Posted: Jun 16 2013 at 10:33pm
OMG this is scarry and sad! its awful not to feel safe in your own hood! I am so sorry this happened to you! I agree its important to take care of yourself and if you can find a therapist to talk to... and join a support group! Hope you heal from this even stronger! self defense is a good idea


Posted By: Mz. Mocha
Date Posted: Jun 16 2013 at 10:47pm
Prayers for you, thank you for sharing. YOU ARE A SURVIVOR! 


Posted By: juniper angel
Date Posted: Jun 17 2013 at 1:12am
Im sorry this happened to you and hope you get better


Posted By: ExotiqBeautii
Date Posted: Jun 17 2013 at 1:49am
Again, thank you all. I've been at my dads this entire weekend. I will be heading home tomorrow morning, which is also the day that I do my interview with channel 6. I've been really relaxed here, so I pray that my calmness follows me home. And again, to those that say that I should've know better than to leave my doors unlocked, it actually doesn't matter. We all need to take precautions whether we are walking or driving, with or without someone with you. I just found out from someone I know, that in downtown Augusta, things like this happen more often than i knew. I'm new to this area, so I didn't know about the dangers downtown. She just informed me not too long ago, a couple was walking, when out of nowhere, a few men came out and beat them with baseball bats. As you see, it has nothing to do with locking your doors, though that is a step to take. This man could have attacked me while I was walking. Yes, I knew he was behind me, but there were still people walking up and down Broad St. because the bars were closing, so I didn't see him as a danger at the time. I don't want to be afraid of everyone that passes me or walks behind me. I just know now, to be more aware of my surroundings. This goes for everyone. I want to be able to speak with everyone on here again, and I don't want anyone to come on here with a story similar to mine. This experience has taught me a great lesson that I'm more than happy to share with everyone, and hopefully, it will reach more after this interview airs on t.v. Goodnight to everyone, and although I don't know you all, I love you guys. You are my viral sisters! Wink  Hug


Posted By: Printer_Ink
Date Posted: Jun 17 2013 at 4:37am
Wow! I am really sorry to hear your story and I am glad you are a surviver!
 
It seems like you have a little PTST right now and particularly around car situations and strangers but do get some help and take care of yourself.
 
My input on how this could have been avoided. I say this for anyone reading this to the OP (hindsight is 20/20) but ... I when I hear of something like this I always to see ways that it could have been avoided.
 
First, thing I NEVER think it's a good idea to go out alone at 2:00 unless it's an emergency and I am going to someone's house. If I am coming home from a party etc and I am on the lookout.
 
Second, whenever I am on the street and I approach a cluster of guys that LOOK ... off. Like they are thugs, homeless, evil or just plain poor looking ... I will make an immediate about face. I don't go anywhere near them. I don't care if it's wrong to avoid people - especially Black guys - based on their looks. MY WELFARE is more important than hurting some strangers feelings.
 
So I don't think the unlocked car was where you went wrong either. I think when you saw that knot
of rough guys - you should have not gotten anywhere near them. This should have triggered your surviver instincts to recognize that you would be an easy 'mark' for them. You said one of the guys even said something about that not being a safe place to walk for a woman. I'll bet HE KNEW something was up and was trying to warn you...
 
But you kept going so when you came back around again ... that creep was waiting for you.
 
I AM NOT BLAMING YOU OP!! This was a horrible experience and no one should have to go through this!
 
My point is I never even in broad daylight ... walk close to a knot of dusty looking dudes. This sends up my antenna immediately and usually change my course waaaay earlier so it is not obvious that I am avoiding them.
 
Women are not 'safe' just walking down the street minding their own business and this is usually how innocent people get assaulted. Too many crazys out there looking for a victim.
 
I know people reading this will say I am wrong to feel this way.. (shrugs) but I don't care.  I live,work and socialize in areas where dusky folk do not hang out sooo if I see a group of them .. they stand out immediately as ... odd.


Posted By: Brjasuga51
Date Posted: Jun 17 2013 at 7:09am
^^^^^.... IT HAPPENED ALREADY....AND I KNOW OP LEARNED FROM IT....NO NEED TO RUB SALT IN HER WOUNDS.AngryAngry . AND LEARN THIS MS PRINTER INK...SOMETIMES NO MATTER HOW MUCH PRECAUTION YOU YTAKE THINGS STILL DO HAPPEN .


Posted By: NoirPur
Date Posted: Jun 17 2013 at 7:56am
Originally posted by Prazol60 Prazol60 wrote:

Interesting. I thought everybody locked their car doors after carjacking got popular in the 90's.

Victim blaming at its finest... Because she made the mistake of not locking her door she deserved to get kicked and punched in the head. It's especially sad when other females do this. 

OP- your story brought tears to my eyes; glad you're safe. 


Posted By: Ritle
Date Posted: Jun 17 2013 at 8:26am
@ExotiqBeautii I am glad you are safe, sorry this happened to you
. I hope you can look passed the criticisms and feed off the positive messages(online and offline). May you heal from this. And no matter what people tell you, remember that this was not your fault, you did not ask for this to happen, repeat this to yourself whenever you feel different (It's normal to experience a roller coaster of emotions with a traumatic event such as this.).

@Prazol60 your criticism was not constructive, in fact the total opposite, especially for an already traumatized person.

@Printer_ink
Quote I don't care if it's wrong to avoid people - especially Black guys - based on their looks.

It is interesting how you should mention to really be on the look out for black guys.... I could tell you plenty of events like this involving white guys but would I warn people to be on the look out for white guys?Nope, because I know generalizations are futile and pointless.
This says more about the person you are than about black guys in general and not in a positive way either.

And yes, shady guys in general are to be avoided, but guess what, it's also those handsome looking seemingly kindhearted guys that can end up doing a 360 on people just because they don't like to be told they can not have you or because they're looking for that thrill that the moral sides of their lives can not offer. That's the reality of things.

Of course women should be careful, but it's all in hindsight now and your destructive criticism packed in advice is misplaced in this thread.

She typed this because she needed to vent and help others in the process, not to read criticism on things she already knows and probably has told herself over and over again in her mind, while at the same time trying to come to terms with the fact that she was victimized and she did not ask for that by her actions.

Take your hidden agenda elsewhere.




Posted By: Printer_Ink
Date Posted: Jun 17 2013 at 8:51am
As I said a couple of times... I WAS NOT BLAMING the OP.
 
I said this to help people AVOID being in this situation .. and I stand by it.
 
I do not think it is ever a good idea to be off in some ghetto area at 2:00, approaching those thugs as she recognized they were.One even asked for money and she said all she did not have cash - all she had was an ATM card. Ahh so now they know you have access to money. And then the one guy tried to warned her? The OP even said it was the ghettio.
 
All these things tell me her instincts were not broadcasting 'warning'  bells.
 
Again, I am not blaming the victim because what happened to her was uncalled for. But my point was the unlocked car door was not her mistake. I would think you'd want to learn from someone's mistake and the moral to this terrible event was .. stay clear of dusky dudes. Period.
 
You guys just decided to skip over this part. Confused
 
Whatever though. If you think it's okay to walk through the ghetto alone as women ... have at it. Not my problem.
 
 


Posted By: GphiD08
Date Posted: Jun 17 2013 at 9:41am
So do you think people get attacked only in the ghetto? What about people getting attacked walking to their car from a shopping mall or someone breaking into your home that was locked. You never know what will happen and if she locked her door dude could have busted her window before she had a chance to start her car. Saying she should have locked her door iafter she suffered such a brutal attack is like telling a rape victim you should have worn looser fitting clothes. She told her story to help people be more aware not to get salt rubbed in the wound.


Posted By: pebbles251
Date Posted: Jun 17 2013 at 9:44am
Glad you are safe. I know how it feels. I too was once gun butted and attacked. Glad you fought back.


Posted By: MsBMW
Date Posted: Jun 17 2013 at 10:14am
Getting back to the OP!!!!
 
I am truly glad you are okay and thank you for speading the message....sending hugs and blessings your way!!!


Posted By: redbaby3
Date Posted: Jun 17 2013 at 11:54am
Reading and my eyes are tearing up. I'm glad you are safe now.


Posted By: dee1672
Date Posted: Jun 17 2013 at 11:59am
I'm not sure it this has been mentioned, but most cars can be configured to automatically lock the doors when the engine is turned on or when the car reaches a certain speed. I would suggest you check to see if yours has that option and change it to lock when you start the car. Glad you're safe. Who knew little ol Augusta could be dangerous.


Posted By: chatnoir
Date Posted: Jun 17 2013 at 12:07pm
Thank goodness you are safe and sound - Hug.  I second India's idea of taking a self-defense class, it's useful for all of us women (and men too!).

I heard on the news just the other day where a woman was attacked in a town in TX in broad daylight coming from a CVS store.  Some of these men will not hesitate to prey on a single woman (cowardly, low-down b*sterds).

Anyway, again, glad that you're safe.


Posted By: india100
Date Posted: Jun 17 2013 at 12:11pm
I think anyone is capable of not locking your door on occasion . As I said a few pages back , I lived in Augusta for 6 Years . Downtown is not Ghetto . Like most places , crime happens anytime of the day . The police is too busy writing tickects for blacks park at a expired meters . Most of the crime is due to White male and females lurking downtown for the next drug fix .


Posted By: supermodelsonya
Date Posted: Jun 17 2013 at 2:19pm
Anywhere can be dangerous.

Even the ones who may not look like they would harm you can and often will. 

I'm sharing this information for others that may be wondering what they can do to prevent this in the future. Blaming the victim helps no one. There are times that one may have to leave their house at 2 in the morning because I know I have. We have the right to move freely regardless. 

Attacks can happen at noon, broad daylight so TIME has NOTHING to do with anything..NOR THE PARTICULAR NEIGHBORHOOD YOU'RE IN. 

USE your own judgment. 

Sometimes taking many precautions won't always stop an attack. 

Here are the three elements that happen before an attack takes place. 

1. Identify--they size you up and decide whether or not it will be worth it to attack you.

2. The Approach--They make comments to you. Ask you for the time, change, etc. 

3. Striking Distance-- They make a move to get to a point where the assault can happen. This is the stage you want to prevent at all costs. At the first two stages is where you want to shut a confrontation down. Do whatever is necessary to prevent an attack. NICENESS is not helpful in this situation. 

4. The Attack--Self explanatory

You don't have to be a martial arts queen to fend off an attack. Use everything you can to fight someone off. My aunt urinated on herself and it prevented a sexual assault once. Scream or act like you're out of your mind. 

Personally I carry a .380 Smith and Wesson with laser sight and I'm trained to use it. It helped ward off an attack I had once in a grocery store. 

Source: The Gift of Fear by Gavin De Becker is an excellent book. 
thecorneredcat.com for those women who are interested in defending themselves using a firearm 

Fight Like A Girl And Win: Defense Decisions for Women--by Lori Hartman Gervasi 
for those that are interested in alternative ways to defend themselves. It's very helpful



Posted By: Emy-Senpai972
Date Posted: Jun 17 2013 at 4:00pm
First OP, I'm so sorry this happened to you... I am glad you are okay. Also, thanks for sharing.
I don't drive, but I take the bus. A few months back a girl was killed on one of the buses I take. I was scared. But I told myself that it would be stupid to be scared , looking over my shoulder, as tbh, that wouldn't be living. Now, I read your story and I'm scared to go to bed !!!!
I live on my own, in a foreign country, which is a source of terror for my Mom. I come home late sometimes. But man, maybe I should start taking self defense classes. Problem is, even with that you're never sure. I was going to tell to get a gun, but again, how can you be sure that iit's the right way ?
People are cruel, rubbing it in your face like that. It happened ! Now if we start blaming the victims, where the hell is this world going !
Take good care of yourself OP. If you can have someone at home with you, that would help. Hopefully, the fear will go away, give it some time. And DO NOT BE ASHAMED !! It was not your fault.


Posted By: supermodelsonya
Date Posted: Jun 17 2013 at 4:08pm
To the OP:

You did not deserve that. I hope that you seek some kind of counseling. It's not your fault. If someone is going to attack you, they are going to do so regardless if you take all the precautions you can take. People have been shot and killed in the midst of bodyguards for crying out loud. If they want to do it, they'll do it Plain and simple. 


Posted By: Ms_Kudos
Date Posted: Jun 17 2013 at 6:08pm
Thank God, you are okay!  And I appreciate this post, I actually don't lonck my doors when I get in, because they lock automatically once I hit a certain speed, but as in your case, that's too late.  I'ma need to do better.  Thanks againHug


Posted By: babycakebabe
Date Posted: Jun 17 2013 at 7:02pm
I am so sorry to hear about you being attacked. So very scary.


Posted By: ExotiqBeautii
Date Posted: Jun 18 2013 at 2:14am
http://www.wjbf.com/story/22616116/downtown-assault-victim-tells-her-story


Posted By: GphiD08
Date Posted: Jun 18 2013 at 2:34am
Originally posted by ExotiqBeautii ExotiqBeautii wrote:

http://www.wjbf.com/story/22616116/downtown-assault-victim-tells-her-story
Thank you for Sharing EB and I hope you are doing a little better.


Posted By: Nigerian_princess
Date Posted: Jun 18 2013 at 11:06am
http://www.wjbf.com/story/22616116/downtown-assault-victim-tells-her-story" rel="nofollow - http://www.wjbf.com/story/22616116/downtown-assault-victim-tells-her-story

Thanks for posting OP!!


Posted By: Nigerian_princess
Date Posted: Jun 18 2013 at 11:11am
Wow I burst into tears watching that segment. I can feel how traumatized you are/were. I just wanna give you a big hug you're a strong woman!!


Posted By: MrsJHorn
Date Posted: Jun 18 2013 at 11:27am
Thank you for sharing your story. You are BRAVE! I'm so sorry you had to experience this!


Posted By: india100
Date Posted: Jun 18 2013 at 11:34am
Originally posted by Nigerian_princess Nigerian_princess wrote:

http://www.wjbf.com/story/22616116/downtown-assault-victim-tells-her-story" rel="nofollow - http://www.wjbf.com/story/22616116/downtown-assault-victim-tells-her-story

Thanks for posting OP!!
Wait is that Exotic ? Admin should post the story in TTT also . Lord thank God she is ok . Beautiful young woman . I hope he rots in jail . Cry


Posted By: Ms_Kudos
Date Posted: Jun 18 2013 at 12:07pm
Ummm, you made me start tearing up!!  Love your courage (and yes, you are gorgeous!!)


Posted By: Brjasuga51
Date Posted: Jun 18 2013 at 12:30pm
OP u are A pretty lady..U survived your attack. Next step is getting help to get pass this horrible experience . YOU WILL  BE FINEHug


Posted By: WhitWhit86
Date Posted: Jun 18 2013 at 3:00pm
You are so beautiful, I cried just watching that, I'm so glad that you are OK, and Thank you for sharing ur story!


Posted By: CallMeLaLa
Date Posted: Jun 18 2013 at 7:25pm
@ExotiqBeautii
You are in my prayers Missy Poo. I am so grateful to God for His mercy and His grace! He is so good all the the time and all the time He is good!!
I would also recommend counseling, just as some of the other ladies have. Much too often we try to brush things off or pretend we are ok when we need to talk to someone. Also, I both admire and applaud your positive attitude, looking at the situation as a blessing and learning opportunity/lesson learned.

May God continue to bless you and keep you! Smile


Posted By: GoodGirlGoneGr8
Date Posted: Jun 19 2013 at 3:29am
God was and still is with you. I don't know you personally, but I'm glad you're okay.

I think paranoia is normal after something like this happens. I've been having bouts with anxiety these last few weeks and I've been meditating on these bible verses for comfort and to ease my mind...hopefully they will help you...

Sorry about the size...






Posted By: ExotiqBeautii
Date Posted: Jun 19 2013 at 3:51am
Thanks guys. And yes, I really need to pick the Bible up again. I keep getting these thoughts that he has friends out looking for me right now. Im not sure if I've mentioned this yet, but he stole my GPS, which has my address in it, and I had a bunch of mail in the car as well (name and address are on them). Every sound I hear, I swear I think it's someone trying to come in here. I don't turn on the t.v so I can make sure I can hear everything. I've even made a plan: if someone comes in, I'll grab my phone and laptop, run upstairs to my room, lock the door, from there, go to my bathroom suite, lock that door, then go to my closet on the other side of my bathroom, and close the door. That will give me time to load my gun (I keep it in a safe), call 911, call my husband on Facetime and pray that help gets here before they come busting through all three doors. It's pitiful, I know, but I honestly feel more safe outside than inside my house at this point. I hate coming home, thinking someone's waiting for me there. It doesn't help that he knows what my car looks like, so they'll know exactly what house to come to. We own our house, and since we're in the military, moving is out of the question; we will unfortunately be here for another 2 years, and I can't wait until it's time for us to leave, so he'll be out of my life for good. I just found out that he's a repeat offender with charges from felony theft to multiple accounts of child cruelty and other things. His report also said that a judge ordered him to receive mental treatment. After reading this, it didn't make me feel any better. For all I know, all he thinks about all day, are ways to get back at me. I don't know him, or whom he knows, so everyone is suspect to me at this point. I started working on my daughter's room again tonight. I do a lot of wood work, so I was out in the garage sanding some poles down for her canopy bed, and I have to keep the garage door open because of all the dust that flies everywhere. Well, I saw a guy walking down my street a little too slow for my comfort, so after he passed, I closed the garage door, because he started staring at me. These are the types of things that I hate that I'm doing now. I'm so paranoid, that I feel trapped! The simplest things, I look at in the wrong way. I live in the suburbs, where they have subdivisions, so we know most of our neighbors on one side (it's a large subdivision), but one person I haven't seen before, I get scared because they happened to walk by my house. Another thing I've noticed, is when I'm playing my music on my laptop, I'll pause it every five minutes to hear anything that sounds suspicious. It scared the crap out of me tonight when I heard the ice maker in my fridge drop a tray of ice in the bucket. I just knew they were coming to get me. I'll feel so much better once my husband gets back home from deployment, but that won't be until next year. I'm so glad my kids aren't here yet, because whatever I'm feeling now, will be times a thousand when they get back from summer break, because now I have to find a plan to get my 10 month, 3 year, and 6 year old to safety in case anyone tries to come for me.


Posted By: natalie2u
Date Posted: Jun 19 2013 at 9:57am
Hug


Posted By: nitabug
Date Posted: Jun 19 2013 at 10:01am
damn. damn. damn.

Sorry this happened to you.


Posted By: HaitianDiva64
Date Posted: Jun 20 2013 at 5:17am
Big hugs to you. I know exactly how tramatizing this can be. I really hope you find strength and don't ley this cripple you just make you all around smarter


Posted By: Printer_Ink
Date Posted: Jun 20 2013 at 7:27am
Originally posted by ExotiqBeautii ExotiqBeautii wrote:

Thanks guys. And yes, I really need to pick the Bible up again. I keep getting these thoughts that he has friends out looking for me right now. Im not sure if I've mentioned this yet, but he stole my GPS, which has my address in it, and I had a bunch of mail in the car as well (name and address are on them). Every sound I hear, I swear I think it's someone trying to come in here. I don't turn on the t.v so I can make sure I can hear everything. I've even made a plan: if someone comes in, I'll grab my phone and laptop, run upstairs to my room, lock the door, from there, go to my bathroom suite, lock that door, then go to my closet on the other side of my bathroom, and close the door. That will give me time to load my gun (I keep it in a safe), call 911, call my husband on Facetime and pray that help gets here before they come busting through all three doors. It's pitiful, I know, but I honestly feel more safe outside than inside my house at this point. I hate coming home, thinking someone's waiting for me there. It doesn't help that he knows what my car looks like, so they'll know exactly what house to come to. We own our house, and since we're in the military, moving is out of the question; we will unfortunately be here for another 2 years, and I can't wait until it's time for us to leave, so he'll be out of my life for good. I just found out that he's a repeat offender with charges from felony theft to multiple accounts of child cruelty and other things. His report also said that a judge ordered him to receive mental treatment. After reading this, it didn't make me feel any better. For all I know, all he thinks about all day, are ways to get back at me. I don't know him, or whom he knows, so everyone is suspect to me at this point. I started working on my daughter's room again tonight. I do a lot of wood work, so I was out in the garage sanding some poles down for her canopy bed, and I have to keep the garage door open because of all the dust that flies everywhere. Well, I saw a guy walking down my street a little too slow for my comfort, so after he passed, I closed the garage door, because he started staring at me. These are the types of things that I hate that I'm doing now. I'm so paranoid, that I feel trapped! The simplest things, I look at in the wrong way. I live in the suburbs, where they have subdivisions, so we know most of our neighbors on one side (it's a large subdivision), but one person I haven't seen before, I get scared because they happened to walk by my house. Another thing I've noticed, is when I'm playing my music on my laptop, I'll pause it every five minutes to hear anything that sounds suspicious. It scared the crap out of me tonight when I heard the ice maker in my fridge drop a tray of ice in the bucket. I just knew they were coming to get me. I'll feel so much better once my husband gets back home from deployment, but that won't be until next year. I'm so glad my kids aren't here yet, because whatever I'm feeling now, will be times a thousand when they get back from summer break, because now I have to find a plan to get my 10 month, 3 year, and 6 year old to safety in case anyone tries to come for me.
 
This is terrible.
 
I have never been in your shoes ... but I would suggest you reach out to him and have a visit. Not alone, no - maybe with a couple of make froiends and just talk to him.
 
I say this because it sounds like he is sortof terrorizing you in your own head. He has not made an threat toward you in your home and for all you know he is off about his business somewhere .. probably trying to look for a new victim. You don't know.
 
But if you arrange a meeting with him in a public place .. just to talk .. you will at least see where his head is at.
 
I don't think religion or the bible is gonna help either. Confused
 
I am not trying to start another fight in this thread. I am just offering my opinion - which is rather than damaging your life further by the thought that he's after you still .. confront him eye to eye in the bright light of day and ask him .. why he attacked you. You might even be surprised -maybe he was high and lost control and truely regrets this. Maybe not .. but at least you will KNOW where his head is at instead of imagining that he is gonna come for you one day.
 
That way of thinking is not sustainable and you need to get some of your power back in your life if you hope to get past this.
 
Also, you definitely need to seek counseling. Definitely.


Posted By: india100
Date Posted: Jun 20 2013 at 8:55am
I disagree with meeting her Attacker . I know God will help . He save my life too many times .


Posted By: iGotSunshine
Date Posted: Jun 20 2013 at 10:56am
OP Hugyou are beautiful.
i'll be praying for your peace of mind and your protection


Posted By: BrownQtee
Date Posted: Jun 20 2013 at 11:37am
Wait..meeting her attacker in person? WTF? Have you lost your damn mind? The nicca tried to kill her. OP don't listen to that fool. I can't believe that sh*t.


Posted By: hairADDICT
Date Posted: Jun 20 2013 at 12:00pm
Daaaaamnnnnn !! Glad to know you're ok ! That`s crazy . I remember to lock my doors from time to time but now I'll efinitely pay more attention to that especially at night or if I'm in a deserted area  or something .


Posted By: hairADDICT
Date Posted: Jun 20 2013 at 12:01pm
You didn't have anything in your car that had your personal info though right ??


Posted By: LovesLace
Date Posted: Jun 20 2013 at 12:08pm
Originally posted by Printer_Ink Printer_Ink wrote:

Originally posted by ExotiqBeautii ExotiqBeautii wrote:

Thanks guys. And yes, I really need to pick the Bible up again. I keep getting these thoughts that he has friends out looking for me right now. Im not sure if I've mentioned this yet, but he stole my GPS, which has my address in it, and I had a bunch of mail in the car as well (name and address are on them). Every sound I hear, I swear I think it's someone trying to come in here. I don't turn on the t.v so I can make sure I can hear everything. I've even made a plan: if someone comes in, I'll grab my phone and laptop, run upstairs to my room, lock the door, from there, go to my bathroom suite, lock that door, then go to my closet on the other side of my bathroom, and close the door. That will give me time to load my gun (I keep it in a safe), call 911, call my husband on Facetime and pray that help gets here before they come busting through all three doors. It's pitiful, I know, but I honestly feel more safe outside than inside my house at this point. I hate coming home, thinking someone's waiting for me there. It doesn't help that he knows what my car looks like, so they'll know exactly what house to come to. We own our house, and since we're in the military, moving is out of the question; we will unfortunately be here for another 2 years, and I can't wait until it's time for us to leave, so he'll be out of my life for good. I just found out that he's a repeat offender with charges from felony theft to multiple accounts of child cruelty and other things. His report also said that a judge ordered him to receive mental treatment. After reading this, it didn't make me feel any better. For all I know, all he thinks about all day, are ways to get back at me. I don't know him, or whom he knows, so everyone is suspect to me at this point. I started working on my daughter's room again tonight. I do a lot of wood work, so I was out in the garage sanding some poles down for her canopy bed, and I have to keep the garage door open because of all the dust that flies everywhere. Well, I saw a guy walking down my street a little too slow for my comfort, so after he passed, I closed the garage door, because he started staring at me. These are the types of things that I hate that I'm doing now. I'm so paranoid, that I feel trapped! The simplest things, I look at in the wrong way. I live in the suburbs, where they have subdivisions, so we know most of our neighbors on one side (it's a large subdivision), but one person I haven't seen before, I get scared because they happened to walk by my house. Another thing I've noticed, is when I'm playing my music on my laptop, I'll pause it every five minutes to hear anything that sounds suspicious. It scared the crap out of me tonight when I heard the ice maker in my fridge drop a tray of ice in the bucket. I just knew they were coming to get me. I'll feel so much better once my husband gets back home from deployment, but that won't be until next year. I'm so glad my kids aren't here yet, because whatever I'm feeling now, will be times a thousand when they get back from summer break, because now I have to find a plan to get my 10 month, 3 year, and 6 year old to safety in case anyone tries to come for me.
 
This is terrible.
 
I have never been in your shoes ... but I would suggest you reach out to him and have a visit. Not alone, no - maybe with a couple of make froiends and just talk to him.
 
I say this because it sounds like he is sortof terrorizing you in your own head. He has not made an threat toward you in your home and for all you know he is off about his business somewhere .. probably trying to look for a new victim. You don't know.
 
But if you arrange a meeting with him in a public place .. just to talk .. you will at least see where his head is at.
 
I don't think religion or the bible is gonna help either. Confused
 
I am not trying to start another fight in this thread. I am just offering my opinion - which is rather than damaging your life further by the thought that he's after you still .. confront him eye to eye in the bright light of day and ask him .. why he attacked you. You might even be surprised -maybe he was high and lost control and truely regrets this. Maybe not .. but at least you will KNOW where his head is at instead of imagining that he is gonna come for you one day.
 
That way of thinking is not sustainable and you need to get some of your power back in your life if you hope to get past this.
 
Also, you definitely need to seek counseling. Definitely.


Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh............



Posted By: india100
Date Posted: Jun 20 2013 at 3:15pm
Worse advice i have ever seen on BHM , especially from a woman in her late 50 's . I can't understand why.Disapprove


Posted By: fakeizme
Date Posted: Jun 20 2013 at 4:42pm
I am so sorry you had to go through this and am very glad you are safe now.
 
I just wanted to note that you did a few things wrong here; one of the most serious is going downtown by yourself and then walking past a group of men. I am surprised you would not think twice about doing this. Going anywhere alone after 12 a.m. is silly (as a woman). Sad but true.
 
Thanks for relaying your story.


Posted By: Nigerian_princess
Date Posted: Jun 20 2013 at 5:00pm
Originally posted by fakeizme fakeizme wrote:


I am so sorry you had to go through this and am very glad you are safe now.
 
I just wanted to note that you did a few things wrong here; one of the most serious is going downtown by yourself and then walking past a group of men. I am surprised you would not think twice about doing this. Going anywhere alone after 12 a.m. is silly (as a woman). Sad but true.
 
Thanks for relaying your story.


It already happened and I'm pretty sure she already knows what she did wrong.


Posted By: Sinnamon_Mami
Date Posted: Jun 20 2013 at 5:16pm
I'm so sorry that this happened to you. Alot of people of being judgemental in this thread but as for me, you have saved my life: I have a habit of going out late at night because a) it's the only time I can get a break(the kids are sleep) and b) it's not that crowded. Please do not meet this person and once again, I'm glad you made it in one piece.. Many people don't come back..Blessings to you and please take care of yourself.


Posted By: GoodGirlGoneGr8
Date Posted: Jun 20 2013 at 6:15pm
I think the OP is wise enough to make decisions on her own.

I get the concept behind meeting with him, but I think that would be a decision to be made by the OP and in due time.

Meeting with a someone after an attack typically comes after the healing process is complete...

This is all fresh though, the OP is still in shock and needs time to heal...

As for shunning the bible...stop. Like, seriously, just stop...ppl have their own experiences that draw them to the bible. Whether or not you choose to turn to it, fine. But don't bring your negativity in when ppl are attempting to comfort someone in need...

I've been praying for you EB...


Posted By: JoliePoufiasse
Date Posted: Jun 20 2013 at 6:37pm
OP, I hope your realize that what you described are classic PTSD symptoms. Fits to a T. Please make sure to visit with a counsellor/psychologist to ensure that these symptoms only remain short-term. This is very important because for some people, not receiving treatment sometimes means that these symptoms of hyper vigilance will become entrenched in your brain chemistry. When that happens, it's harder to get rid of. Believe me when I say that you don't want that. If you want to speak to clergy on top of that, that's fine. Just don't underestimate the power of PTSD!
 
And I wouldn't meet my attacker. Judging by the info provided to you by the court, he has mental problems. Which means it's unlikely that you will get any closure or reassurance from him. It has already been established that he's volatile.


Posted By: ExotiqBeautii
Date Posted: Jun 20 2013 at 7:17pm
I am very surprised by some of the comments within this thread. Some of the advice that I've read, I find appalling. As for most of the advice, THANK YOU; it has given me more strength in not being as paranoid, though I do have really bad days in dealing with this. We are military, as I've stated before, so anyone that is, or has been in the military (or even a dependent), where should I go/whom should I talk to about this?

 I'm asking this because the issue I'm having here, is that my husband is a higher ranking soldier. In his job field, sometimes he does work in the embassies around the world. Our next duty station will possibly be at another embassy, and I was told that some of the assignments he'll be able to get, might not happen, because of my "state of mind". I don't mean this in a bad way, but he told me that some places around the world won't have the "specific doctors" I will need, if I need to see a head doctor. Many medical facilities in these countries are limited in what they practice, so the ARMY will more than likely station us in a place where it won't be too far for me to see a specialist if needed.

I heard there is a certain doctor that you can see, where it doesn't go on record that you're "Crazy". Trust me, the ARMY records everything, and it always effects the soldier's file.

Should I go to an off base specialist, or will that go in the record as well? I'm so confused, I don't know what to do right now.

I hope this makes sense; if not, let me know and I'll try to explain it better. I don't want to be limited in the places we get to choose to go.


Posted By: HowardAlumAKA
Date Posted: Jun 20 2013 at 7:57pm
I am so sorry this happened to you.

Make sure you get a taser and carry it with you.


Posted By: LovesLace
Date Posted: Jun 20 2013 at 8:03pm
Originally posted by ExotiqBeautii ExotiqBeautii wrote:

I am very surprised by some of the comments within this thread. Some of the advice that I've read, I find appalling. As for most of the advice, THANK YOU; it has given me more strength in not being as paranoid, though I do have really bad days in dealing with this. We are military, as I've stated before, so anyone that is, or has been in the military (or even a dependent), where should I go/whom should I talk to about this?

 I'm asking this because the issue I'm having here, is that my husband is a higher ranking soldier. In his job field, sometimes he does work in the embassies around the world. Our next duty station will possibly be at another embassy, and I was told that some of the assignments he'll be able to get, might not happen, because of my "state of mind". I don't mean this in a bad way, but he told me that some places around the world won't have the "specific doctors" I will need, if I need to see a head doctor. Many medical facilities in these countries are limited in what they practice, so the ARMY will more than likely station us in a place where it won't be too far for me to see a specialist if needed.

I heard there is a certain doctor that you can see, where it doesn't go on record that you're "Crazy". Trust me, the ARMY records everything, and it always effects the soldier's file.

Should I go to an off base specialist, or will that go in the record as well? I'm so confused, I don't know what to do right now.

I hope this makes sense; if not, let me know and I'll try to explain it better. I don't want to be limited in the places we get to choose to go.


Hon, when you did the news story you put your name out there.  If they really search they wife's mental stability before giving an assignment (doubt if the would and I doubt if that's even legal) I am sure the Army could also check your and your DH's FB page because you posted the story there too which I seriously doubt they will.

 You are also assuming that you will need long term counseling and medication which is not necessarily true.

Besides, I doubt very seriously that the Army will hinder your husband's career because his wife was traumatized from a mugging. You are over thinking this thing. Go to the doctor if you feel you need counseling and your PCP will recommend someone for you.



Posted By: GphiD08
Date Posted: Jun 20 2013 at 8:38pm

I would say that what you are feeling is a completely normal response for anyone who has just been a victim of such crime, but you CAN NOT continue to live your life in fear, you will really go crazy.

 

Whether it's a military therapist or an off base one I strongly believe that you should seek professional counseling. I would suggest you seek someone that does not prescribe medication as the key to treatment; instead seek someone  who will be more inclined to help you develop life skills to help you work through this traumatic incident and coping mechanisms that will help alleviate the anxiety your feeling.

 

As many stated, self-defense classes will be a great way for you to get out of the house, around some people and to learn some skills that will help you feel better equipped to protect yourself in the future.

 

 

Also, don’t take everyone on BHM that seriously... Everyone will have an opinion on what you should have done and what you should do now. If you feel it’s a negative comment, please don’t internalize it because it is only adding to the stress that you are dealing with.

 



Posted By: india100
Date Posted: Jun 20 2013 at 9:41pm

I will send you a PM . One of friends works in Augusta as a Therapist . I work in the medical field as a Nurse .  You are not crazy . Trauma can cause severe depression . God Bless.



Posted By: GoodGirlGoneGr8
Date Posted: Jun 20 2013 at 10:14pm
Therapists and counselors are good ways to get off-base help without a paper trail...


Posted By: foxyroy19
Date Posted: Jun 21 2013 at 1:42am

Overseas military spouse here.  Your story had me in complete awe.  Well written and heart wrenching.  If you don't want to have a paper trail you will have to NOT use your husbands' insurance.  You will need to be seen off base by a private facility.  If asked if you have insurance the answer is NO.  Cash payment.  Use an alias if possible.



Posted By: foxyroy19
Date Posted: Jun 21 2013 at 1:45am
Your husband did not come home?


Posted By: alynxx
Date Posted: Jun 21 2013 at 4:35pm
Sorry that this happened to you!


Posted By: ExotiqBeautii
Date Posted: Jun 21 2013 at 11:45pm
Originally posted by foxyroy19 foxyroy19 wrote:

Your husband did not come home?

He was ready to come home that day, but I told him to stay. At the time, I wasn't feeling the paranoia I feel now. I just spoke with him today again, and we figured I could talk to a specialist, but let her/him know that I just need to talk to someone. I don't feel my thoughts will be long term; it seems like I have better days, and it's only been a week since it happened. And you guys are right, I refuse to go on drugs to deal with my feelings. That, in my opinion, will only make things worse for me, especially if I ever choose to go off of them. I really think I just need to talk to someone that knows the right advice to give me. Again, thanks. I also have another question: another news station contacted me (South Carolina). Is it a good idea to do another interview? I do feel like talking about it gives me strength, but I don't know if it will help me or hurt me. It is in another state, so I doubt he'll know I'm talking about him. I just need outsider's opinions.


Posted By: shantel75
Date Posted: Jun 22 2013 at 12:49am
Originally posted by ExotiqBeautii ExotiqBeautii wrote:

http://www.wjbf.com/story/22616116/downtown-assault-victim-tells-her-story
 
WOW, EB! Watching this makes my heart ache. Again, I'm sorry this has happened to you. I'm praying for you too girl, because I know what it feels like to walk in fear. Be encouraged, sis! Hugs.


Posted By: Sinnamon_Mami
Date Posted: Jun 22 2013 at 5:49am
I just watched the report. Oh my goodness.. He could've really hurt you. I wanted to cry when you started to cry... You are tiny so I'm glad you fought him off of you and I'm glad people didn't just stand by... My heart just truly hurts for you Cry


Posted By: GoodGirlGoneGr8
Date Posted: Jun 22 2013 at 7:41am
I applaud you for your decision to avoid meds/drugs...

I say, write down the pros and cons to why you would wanna do the 2nd int vs. not doing it...and go with whichever outweighs the other.

But if your concern is safety (which is a legitimate concern) then maybe don't do it. Your peace of mind is more important than talking to the media.

I'm not a specialist nor am I qualified to give advice, but if you ever wanna talk just lmk...


Posted By: harley_quinn
Date Posted: Jun 22 2013 at 10:37am
OP you seem like a very strong woman and I'm sure you will pull through just fine. Thanks for updating us. I'm visting Georgia and I realized most areas around here don't have street lights and surrounded by woods. I had to tell my family this story just so they can know to be more cautious.


Posted By: LeeMari
Date Posted: Jun 22 2013 at 4:08pm
OP, I'm so sorry to hear this happened to you. I hope readers will learn a lesson from your experience and be more cautious. I'm going to be more careful when I'm somewhere alone. My prayers go out to you. Be strong!


Posted By: ShadeTree
Date Posted: Jun 24 2013 at 2:56am
Originally posted by danieb23 danieb23 wrote:

Poor baby!!! When you said he started pulling off your clothes I started crying!
I'm glad you are ok, I can only imagine your fear!!
&& I know It doesn't help that hubby is away, but be strong untill he returns and please be careful!

God Bless, and thank GOD you are alive!!


I cried around that point as well. My eyes welled up.
I am so glad you're okay!
God bless you.


Posted By: ShadeTree
Date Posted: Jun 24 2013 at 3:07am

watched the video, you're a beautiful woman and a strong one. you'll get through this.
Hug


Posted By: Ritle
Date Posted: Jun 24 2013 at 6:34am
@ExotiqBeautii I have read some pretty good advice regarding counseling.
I hope it will help you. As for another interview, only do it if you are absolutely sure that it can help you heal without having to deal with negative consequences that are out of your hands.

I would tell you to do what you have to do when you are ready to do it, but because you have little kids depending on you, it's best to deal with some of the issues early on. I'm glad to read that you are willing to take the necessary steps and wish you all the strength you need to go through it.

May you continue to find strength where ever and from whomever you can get it.

And let no one tell you other wise.

Take care!


Posted By: nikky009
Date Posted: Jun 28 2013 at 3:38pm
im so glad that you are okay Shocked and that the god almighty looked after you that night an thanks to this post i will be purchasing pepper spray an a stun gun stat an maybe some self defense lessons in the near future


Posted By: ExotiqBeautii
Date Posted: Jun 29 2013 at 2:06am
Thanks you guys. Over the pass weeks, I've developed insomnia according to my doctor. I've gone days without sleeping, which is something I didn't know was even possible for the human body. I don't have an appetite, and I eat one salad a day just to put something in my stomach. I feel as though I'm going crazy! He prescribed me something called ambian, but it doesn't help me fall asleep; I just end up feeling high for a few hours. I have an appt on Monday to see my doctor again for another option.  The first few days, I was fine, but things seem to be getting worse for me for some reason. Though, the good news is, he had a bond hearing yesterday. I was going to go, but I couldn't talk myself up to it, so I skipped it. After calling the booking system a few minutes ago, I found out that he was denied bond for his charges. I'm so happy and I thank GOD.



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