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Spare the Rod or Too Damn Much?

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Printed Date: Feb 28 2021 at 9:53am


Topic: Spare the Rod or Too Damn Much?
Posted By: Momeijheii
Subject: Spare the Rod or Too Damn Much?
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 11:50am
was grabbing a belt too much trouble?  Confused
Oh. And why would someone upload that?



Replies:
Posted By: yurika975
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 11:50am
whooping! I understand his frustration....though many will disagree with his method. I don't think that a gentle time out in the corner would work. I do think that banishment from phones, internet etc would be in order.  


Posted By: bunzaveli
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 12:01pm
i wanted to post this, but i figured i shouldnt. 


Posted By: CamiK
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 12:03pm
That looks like some type of cord..right?  I don't condone the punishment or the uploading of a video of it...smh...


Posted By: aNgElIc*SoUl
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 12:13pm
Who the hell recorded this and then uploaded it?


Posted By: jonesable
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 12:14pm
Damn removed from the home?
I didn't watch the video.

But i don't like the idea of just snatching people's kids away.
Unless something very malicious is going in


Posted By: bindy
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 12:14pm
who taped the beating?


Posted By: aNgElIc*SoUl
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 12:15pm
Originally posted by Positive K Positive K wrote:

If he deserves to go to jail then there's millions of more black mothers and fathers that would be behind bars too. Iono how these videos get online.


True, I've seen and gotten worse than this before, and I wasn't doing anything as bad as recording a twerk video, sometimes nothing at all.


Posted By: yurika975
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 12:17pm
I wonder also who uploaded the vid.....


Posted By: Sang Froid
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 12:17pm
He think he a slave master.


Posted By: Qualified
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 12:18pm
I stand corrected, someone surely was holding the camera...


Posted By: Midwest_Da_Gawd
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 12:19pm
That's a Black man who REFUSES to allow his daughters to succumb to a life of whoredom and ratchetness. Most of these sisters out here didn't have a father in their lives to nip that type of behavior in the bud.

GOD BLESS THAT MAN! Beer


Posted By: loveandpeace1984
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 12:20pm
I'm on the fence about this one, I definitely understand his frustration. Having a whore of a daughter for the world to see would make me lose my mind. But that beating was too fierce and way too emotional for him to beat her like that. She will definitely think twice about whoring her body.


Posted By: aNgElIc*SoUl
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 12:24pm
.


Posted By: Qualified
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 12:24pm
I agree with Midwest on this one. They were clothed, the beating was contained to the lower portion of their bodies', and quite frankly, I wouldve done the exact same thing. Only choice I got in my ass whoopins growing up, was which switch to pick , and I thank my parental's (tho my mom, was more the disciplinarian) for every single one of those ass whoopins.



Posted By: Qualified
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 12:31pm
@ Angelic- you're definitely right. I stand corrected.


Posted By: aNgElIc*SoUl
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 12:36pm
Originally posted by loveandpeace1984 loveandpeace1984 wrote:

But that beating was too fierce and way too emotional for him to beat her like that.


This is exactly what my mom would say. She feels some kind of way about a man being so upset about certain things(like her body and what she's doing with it) concerning his daughter or even laying his hands on his daughter period.


Posted By: Ladycoils
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 12:40pm
I don't find anything the matter in which he punished the girls. Many people like to forget that most black household used this method to punish their child or children. I don't agree with this method in every circumstance. But I'm sure they wont do that again.
 
I wouldn't have put it on the net for all to see.


Posted By: Qualified
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 12:42pm
^^^ Exactly^^^


Posted By: James Avery
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 12:43pm
spanking isn't supposed to be comfortable to watch, so i can understand why people don't like to see it, especially if they didn't grow up getting spanked as children. but imho, i see nothing wrong with this vid. neither spanking lasted more than 15-20.


Posted By: Carmensworld
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 12:46pm
Id just rather if it was a woman doing it because those strikes are coming from a grown man and he was going full force.My father layed down the law and never put a finger on me.


Posted By: James Avery
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 12:48pm
its only abuse if there are marks or bruises left to vital body parts( above shoulders) belt marks to the legs and arms is fair game, tbh.


Posted By: loveandpeace1984
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 12:49pm
I feel the mother should have whooped her, I think a father should never put hands on his daughter so she will never ever feel that it is appropriate for a male to put hands on her, but also verbally discipline her that she should never push a man to put hands, but he should never put hands on you either. Give respect, etc. 


Posted By: mommykat
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 12:56pm
Originally posted by -Shesus- -Shesus- wrote:

I dont agree with  the I got beat, so its ok for others to get beat excuse. (reminds me of the sophia/celie convo)  But yes I believe in discipline, no I dont believe in abuse.  You can have one without the other.  I've never had to make my kids run, jump or cry in fear in such a manner because of a beating.  

What we saw looked like it may have left cuts or welts.  I don't condone that at all


You should only have to give them a look...
If I look at my son with a unhappy face... he knows...

He fears the look in my eyes...

*did not look at /or watch the vid...*



Posted By: JasonWllms55
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 12:57pm
this video was quite disturbing.  he was swinging that switch like a mad man. looks like he could have been intoxicated. that girl's screams sounded like they were out of a horror movie. who ever recorded and  uploaded this needs a bus driver type uppercut


Posted By: Samoneisthebest
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:02pm
That is a grown ass man hitting little girls with full force and with anger. 

You are never suppose to beat your kids out of anger.

I'm sure they learned how to respect their bodies after he bruised it up and left it sore. Ermm They are old enough for a talk about self respect and talking away of privileges to have sufficed.

The only thing they learned from that is to dislike and fear their father. Don't confuse fear with respect.


Posted By: Momeijheii
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:03pm

switch
belt
house shoe
hand
cotton balls
q-tips
Cable/extension cord thingy Sleepy


Posted By: Samoneisthebest
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:06pm
And from first hand experience. Being beat with a cord does leave cuts on your skin. I had to wear long sleeves for 2 weeks so my teachers wouldn't see.


Posted By: SweetNovember*
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:11pm
They got a whipping, what can I say? It happens. 

The only thing I see wrong is that they seem a little too old to be getting spanked like that.


Posted By: SweetNovember*
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:12pm
I do wonder why he beat the second one worse...


Posted By: Wildfire
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:13pm
Originally posted by yurika975 yurika975 wrote:

whooping! I understand his frustration....though many will disagree with his method. I don't think that a gentle time out in the corner would work. I do think that banishment from phones, internet etc would be in order.  



Time out for this type of mess is waste of time. I notice he was aiming at their legs, so even though he was angry he clearly had some type of control. i bet their ass will think twice about doing this again. Nip that sh*t in the bud. Six years from now and its dack sucking the cheese off random nasty rappers from their town on stage in broad daylight.


kids today are just too damn fast. Everybody wants the shortcut to growndom.
No.






Posted By: tatee
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:14pm
we carried a lot of ba ge over from slavery.


Posted By: creole booty
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:14pm
Treat ur kids like animals/slaves and don't b surprised when they act like one. I don't hit my baby. That's my baby. I'd hit a stranger on the street like that if I thought my life was in danger, but not someone that I've loved and protected since the day I found out I was pregnant. I wouldn't leave her father, I would train her father on how to train her. Clearly that's how he was raised. I'm not raising an angry person who beats people to correct them. I'm not raising a mob wife/basketball wife/thug. I'm raising a future leader and that's not how I'm going to show her to deal with people. Her dad would have to apologize, and then she would b disciplined correctly. Her dad would apolologize for how he did it, not for doing it. We gotta teach patience by practicing it. Getting rid of the father because he doesn't know better (he had good intentions, hell he's there) won't fix it. Teaching the father better is part of being a good wife/mother. You gotta nip that crap, nicccas will not beat on my precious baby. Not her man, not her daddy, not her brother, cousin, aunti, uncle, nobody.


Posted By: sache1991
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:14pm
You can tell who grew up around a father figure and who didn't with these responses...Sleepy


Posted By: jonesable
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:15pm
Oh its the father beating a daughter.
I don't like that.

I don't think father's should hit their daughter's


Posted By: aNgElIc*SoUl
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:16pm
Originally posted by Samoneisthebest Samoneisthebest wrote:

And from first hand experience. Being beat with a cord does leave cuts on your skin. I had to wear long sleeves for 2 weeks so my teachers wouldn't see.


My mom made me wear long sleeves too, she just got lucky nobody really got suspicious......I remember one time I was made to wear long sleeved shirts to cover the bruises, it was April, in Louisiana


Posted By: zsazsa
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:17pm
WTF? that is ABUSE pure and simple. Remove his kids as obviously he doesn't know how to parent effectively. 

How can anyone think this is normal. Urgh


Posted By: Random Thoughts
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:17pm
I think I been on BHM too long. I can't read threads on their own merits anymore. I always think back to past threads on the same subject, and wanna compare the answers.

Spanking threads on here always have me like

http://25.media.tumblr.com/69609b32e7abd8814a360436cf3ee0ce/tumblr_mkdy95JTjO1s65rzwo1_400.gif


Posted By: Wildfire
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:18pm
Originally posted by Samoneisthebest Samoneisthebest wrote:

That is a grown ass man hitting little girls with full force and with anger. 

You are never suppose to beat your kids out of anger.

I'm sure they learned how to respect their bodies after he bruised it up and left it sore. Ermm They are old enough for a talk about self respect and talking away of privileges to have sufficed.

The only thing they learned from that is to dislike and fear their father. Don't confuse fear with respect.

maybe he spoke to them several times over already. the beating was hard, but we dont know what people are going through. who knows how many jobs that man has to work to feed them. i wouldnt give my kid a beatdown quite like that, but i can understand where he could be coming from.


my parents would talk alright....and then if your ass didnt heed, surely one day you'd be in the midst of some foolywang and get a bitch lick thatd' stop you in your tracks.





Posted By: zsazsa
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:19pm
I grew up with BOTH parents and have never been slapped/shoved/hit let alone beaten like an animal. My siblings and I turned out just fukkin fine. 

I wish I never watched that shiit


Posted By: sache1991
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:21pm
Originally posted by zsazsa zsazsa wrote:

I grew up with BOTH parents and have never been slapped/shoved/hit let alone beaten like an animal. I and my siblings turned out just fukkin fine. 

I wish I never watched that shiit

I bet you didn't shake your ass to the masses either. All kids won't necessarily need a spanking most do...Sleepy

What's the worst thing that you did as a kid?


Posted By: tatee
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:22pm
lol @ censoring the word bag-gageErmm bhm


Posted By: MdDyme07
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:23pm
Originally posted by -Shesus- -Shesus- wrote:

ummm, is nobody here afraid cps or dyfs being called on them??  I got too much to lose.  Many places wont hire you if got child abuse on ur record.  .....schools, social work, day cares, hospitals, bus drivers, care takers, politics,  etc....

Do u really wanna blackball yourself?

You probably got time-outs as a child lol.


Posted By: zsazsa
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:23pm
I honestly can't wrap around the idea that people think this is fine. That was horrendous violence . HE IS A FUKKIN MONSTER. I pray to god that video gets in the hands of the authority and he is dealt with swiftly. 

People being raised in abuse thinking that is normal. Er, NO. 


Posted By: mrshairdo
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:26pm
I ain't mad at the Father and my Dad never hit me
*shrugs*


Posted By: Samoneisthebest
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:27pm
Originally posted by Wildfire Wildfire wrote:

Originally posted by Samoneisthebest Samoneisthebest wrote:

That is a grown ass man hitting little girls with full force and with anger. 

You are never suppose to beat your kids out of anger.

I'm sure they learned how to respect their bodies after he bruised it up and left it sore. Ermm They are old enough for a talk about self respect and talking away of privileges to have sufficed.

The only thing they learned from that is to dislike and fear their father. Don't confuse fear with respect.

maybe he spoke to them several times over already. the beating was hard, but we dont know what people are going through. who knows how many jobs that man has to work to feed them. i wouldnt give my kid a beatdown quite like that, but i can understand where he could be coming from.





I don't condone beating children out of anger and frustration. Discipline should be out of love.


Posted By: jonesable
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:28pm
Even though I don't like it I still don't want her taken away. Damn maybe the issue can be fixed.

Yall think we have a messed up view of parenting then yall REALLY have a effed up view of foster care system


Posted By: Samoneisthebest
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:29pm
My step dad use to come up with some creative way to discipline me since he didn't want to spank me. The one I hated the most was when he was like "Hold your arms out to your sides until I say put em down"

It would only be like a minute but my shoulders would be on fiya LOL 

I think I might use that form of dicipline. My kids gonna be some in shape mofos.


Posted By: mrshairdo
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:30pm
How are beatings never not about anger and frustration?'It's the anger and frustration that causes you to lick the child in the first place. Who beats and says " baby I'm doing this out of love and from a good place" *proceeds to tag that azz* ... What's the point in that?


Posted By: zsazsa
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:31pm
Originally posted by Wildfire Wildfire wrote:

Originally posted by yurika975 yurika975 wrote:

whooping! I understand his frustration....though many will disagree with his method. I don't think that a gentle time out in the corner would work. I do think that banishment from phones, internet etc would be in order.  



Time out for this type of mess is waste of time. I notice he was aiming at their legs, so even though he was angry he clearly had some type of control. i bet their ass will think twice about doing this again. Nip that sh*t in the bud. Six years from now and its dack sucking the cheese off random nasty rappers from their town on stage in broad daylight.


kids today are just too damn fast. Everybody wants the shortcut to growndom.
No.





Yeah why don't you control your little daughters via violence and keep them in their place. Place shame, pain and hurt on their bodies. Don't be surprised if these girls end up with abusive men. Hey they learnt from Daddy dearest. All that the fukker is teaching them is fear cos he is a SHIIT parent who has NO control and takes it out on women to keep them in their place. That is NO father. Are the black community so desperate for a father figure they accept this as a father? no thank you ma'am. 

If there was a way I could report his arse, I would get a international calling card so I could do it. 


Posted By: bunzaveli
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:32pm
Originally posted by mrshairdo mrshairdo wrote:

How are beatings never not about anger and frustration?'It's the anger and frustration that causes you to lick the child in the first place. Who beats and says " baby I'm doing this out of love and from a good place" *proceeds to tag that azz* ... What's the point in that?
funniest post i read all day, you never heard someone say im beating the sh*t outta you cause i love you ?


Posted By: Samoneisthebest
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:34pm
Originally posted by mrshairdo mrshairdo wrote:

How are beatings never not about anger and frustration?'It's the anger and frustration that causes you to lick the child in the first place. Who beats and says " baby I'm doing this out of love and from a good place" *proceeds to tag that azz* ... What's the point in that?

No.


Posted By: Lady ICE
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:35pm
imo. the only thing wrong with this vid is that dad was waaaay too emotional...you saw how far back his arm went.Geek he could've really hurt them..and same goes for moms cause i've seen that before too...but kids needs spankings sometimes. if i caught my daughter twerkin anything for the public...its a done deal.

im lookin at her now like...i wish you would..lol. aw my baby.


Posted By: aNgElIc*SoUl
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:35pm
Originally posted by mrshairdo mrshairdo wrote:

How are beatings never not about anger and frustration?'It's the anger and frustration that causes you to lick the child in the first place. Who beats and says " baby I'm doing this out of love and from a good place" *proceeds to tag that azz* ... What's the point in that?


Yeah, I've never gotten that excuse either, it seems to be acceptable when hitting a child, but let a man say he beats his wife out of love


Posted By: bunzaveli
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:35pm
sometimes you just gotta tear that ass up one good time


Posted By: mrshairdo
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:36pm
Originally posted by bunzaveli bunzaveli wrote:


Originally posted by mrshairdo mrshairdo wrote:

How are beatings never not about anger and frustration?'It's the anger and frustration that causes you to lick the child in the first place. Who beats and says " baby I'm doing this out of love and from a good place" *proceeds to tag that azz* ... What's the point in that?
funniest post i read all day, you never heard someone say im beating the sh*t outta you cause i love you ?


Lol not a parent, my mom wasn't comforting me before, during or after an azz whooping. She was pissed, it's unrealistic to think that would/should be a parent's mindset before tagging that azz


Posted By: sache1991
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:36pm
You fuccc up you get spanked simple as that...think I got 2 or 3 spanking throughout my childhood until I was 12 and I thank my dad for that. Never thought I was an animal or a slave for it. Never affected my self esteem. Ermm

Most parents don't like giving spanking...they put on the angry face as a front. Usually after the spanking the parent with have a sad face and tell the child what they did was wrong. Share a hug and move on. Disapprove


Posted By: mrshairdo
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:37pm
Originally posted by bunzaveli bunzaveli wrote:

sometimes you just gotta tear that ass up one good time



I agree


Posted By: mrshairdo
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:38pm
Originally posted by sache1991 sache1991 wrote:

You fuccc up you get spanked simple as that...think I got 2 or 3 spanking throughout my childhood until I was 12 and I thank my dad for that. Never thought I was an animal or a slave for it. Never affected my self esteem. Ermm


Ppl are just being extra, as usual


Posted By: Qualified
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:39pm
Originally posted by bunzaveli bunzaveli wrote:

sometimes you just gotta tear that ass up one good time




SIMPLE AS THAT


Posted By: tatee
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:39pm
Originally posted by bunzaveli bunzaveli wrote:

Originally posted by mrshairdo mrshairdo wrote:

How are beatings never not about anger and frustration?'It's the anger and frustration that causes you to lick the child in the first place. Who beats and says " baby I'm doing this out of love and from a good place" *proceeds to tag that azz* ... What's the point in that?
funniest post i read all day, you never heard someone say im beating the sh*t outta you cause i love you ?


yeah i was actually told this growing up and im convinced it screwed up my beliefs and ability to accept what people call love. 


Posted By: Wildfire
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:39pm
Originally posted by Lady ICE Lady ICE wrote:

imo. the only thing wrong with this vid is that dad was waaaay too emotional...you saw how far back his arm went.Geek he could've really hurt them..and same goes for moms cause i've seen that before too...but kids needs spankings sometimes. if i caught my daughter twerkin anything for the public...its a done deal.

im lookin at her now like...i wish you would..lol. aw my baby.




ITA @ the bolded






Posted By: bunzaveli
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:43pm
Originally posted by Lady ICE Lady ICE wrote:

imo. the only thing wrong with this vid is that dad was waaaay too emotional...you saw how far back his arm went.Geek he could've really hurt them..and same goes for moms cause i've seen that before too...but kids needs spankings sometimes. if i caught my daughter twerkin anything for the public...its a done deal.

im lookin at her now like...i wish you would..lol. aw my baby.
he was doing to much


Posted By: Wildfire
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:43pm
...i dont agree with violent beatings, but i see where spanking is necessary sometimes. when mom or dad would spank, we always knew why we were being spanked....you'd get it in the middle of your hands, or on the legs or butt --no full scale body beating...but it still hurt, and you still remembered each time you started whatever mess you got spanked for --and it sure as hell put a spoke in your wheel.
---none of us are or have been in any abusive relationships...we dont kill people and put in the freezer and we loved our dad to death and all had a good relationship with him.

spankings have their place.

the random whack works just fine too.


sometimes kids just dont listen, no matter what you do or how they are being brought up. kids from the best of homes still do sh*t.




Posted By: maysay1
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:43pm
Good parents don't spank/whoop/hit their children, abusive parents do.


Posted By: mrshairdo
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:44pm
Originally posted by tatee tatee wrote:


Originally posted by bunzaveli bunzaveli wrote:


Originally posted by mrshairdo mrshairdo wrote:

How are beatings never not about anger and frustration?'It's the anger and frustration that causes you to lick the child in the first place. Who beats and says " baby I'm doing this out of love and from a good place" *proceeds to tag that azz* ... What's the point in that?
funniest post i read all day, you never heard someone say im beating the sh*t outta you cause i love you ?


yeah i was actually told this growing up and im convinced it screwed up my beliefs and ability to accept what people call love. 


That's really sad


Posted By: mrshairdo
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:46pm
Originally posted by Wildfire Wildfire wrote:

...i dont agree with violent beatings, but i see where spanking is necessary sometimes. when mom or dad would spank, we always knew why we were being spanked....you'd get it in the middle of your hands, or on the legs or butt --no full scale body beating...but it still hurt, and you still remembered each time you started whatever mess you got spanked for --and it sure as hell put a spoke in your wheel.
---none of us are or have been in any abusive relationships...we dont kill people and put in the freezer and we loved our dad to death and all had a good relationship with him.

spankings have their place.




I agree with this, ppl are so extra when this topic comes up. Every kid that got serious azz whoopings is not gunna grow up accepting abusive relationships, that's reaching beyond.

You are right, spankings have their place.


Posted By: Wildfire
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:47pm
Originally posted by maysay1 maysay1 wrote:

Good parents don't spank/whoop/hit their children, abusive parents do.


^
the reason why generalisations are stupid.

my parents were wonderful people. bless their souls
.






Posted By: Lady ICE
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:47pm
Originally posted by bunzaveli bunzaveli wrote:

Originally posted by Lady ICE Lady ICE wrote:

imo. the only thing wrong with this vid is that dad was waaaay too emotional...you saw how far back his arm went.Geek he could've really hurt them..and same goes for moms cause i've seen that before too...but kids needs spankings sometimes. if i caught my daughter twerkin anything for the public...its a done deal.

im lookin at her now like...i wish you would..lol. aw my baby.
he was doing to much
thats what i meant. Geek but i can understand his anger and why he went haywire.


Posted By: Wildfire
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:49pm
Originally posted by mrshairdo mrshairdo wrote:


 ppl are so extra when this topic comes up. Every kid that got serious azz whoopings is not gunna grow up accepting abusive relationships, that's reaching beyond.

You are right, spankings have their place.


....talmbout their kids are made of cotton candy, they wont do no wrong, and if they do, pink unicorns and lemondade will make it all better...
i'd love to be a fly on the wall....


Posted By: bunzaveli
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:49pm
Originally posted by Lady ICE Lady ICE wrote:

Originally posted by bunzaveli bunzaveli wrote:

Originally posted by Lady ICE Lady ICE wrote:

imo. the only thing wrong with this vid is that dad was waaaay too emotional...you saw how far back his arm went.Geek he could've really hurt them..and same goes for moms cause i've seen that before too...but kids needs spankings sometimes. if i caught my daughter twerkin anything for the public...its a done deal.

im lookin at her now like...i wish you would..lol. aw my baby.
he was doing to much
thats what i meant. Geek but i can understand his anger and why he went haywire.
ok baye baye


Posted By: Random Thoughts
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:50pm
Does men spanking their daughters have a place?


Posted By: Sleek
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:50pm
It was a bit excessive but for a reason, the other day I saw a mother knock her two year old son's head into a van window for no reason and then asked him what the "F" he was doing all the child was doing was playing with her now broads like that need to be locked away 


Posted By: JoliePoufiasse
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:51pm
Originally posted by tatee tatee wrote:

we carried a lot of ba ge over from slavery.
From the responses in this thread, it only underlines how fucced up black people are. And then people wonder why communities are in such disaray.


Posted By: Wildfire
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:53pm
Originally posted by Random Thoughts Random Thoughts wrote:

Does men spanking their daughters have a place?




your question is unclear...



Posted By: Random Thoughts
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:53pm
Originally posted by Wildfire Wildfire wrote:

Originally posted by Random Thoughts Random Thoughts wrote:

Does men spanking their daughters have a place in the home?




your question is unclear...



Fixed?

Basically, question posed to those who are pro-spanking. Are you cool with fathers spanking daughters?


Posted By: Wildfire
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 1:55pm
a father is a parent too, so yes (pro reasonable spanking, not violent thrashings)


Posted By: maysay1
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 2:03pm
Originally posted by JoliePoufiasse JoliePoufiasse wrote:

Originally posted by tatee tatee wrote:

we carried a lot of ba ge over from slavery.
From the responses in this thread, it only underlines how fucced up black people are. And then people wonder why communities are in such disaray.


People are in such denial, it's sad. And that's why our kids will keep killing each other.

What do children learn from being hit by their parents?
-They learn that there is no unconditional love. That the people who are supposed to love them unconditionally, only love them until they make a mistake. Then they physically abuse them (and physical abuse can never equal love, no matter what we may convince ourselves).
-They learn that the two people who are supposed to protect them are actual people they should be afraid of.
-They learn that abuse and humiliation are the way to get people to do what you want them to do.

We've normalized abuse and bullying in our own homes and then our kids go out and repeat that behavior in their interactions with others. It's sad that we're raising our kids this way. And I use the term "raising" loosely because hitting is the easy way out for parents...actually parenting and raising children takes much more work and commitment.


Posted By: Lady ICE
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 2:06pm
so what do you guys suggest then? when time outs and talks stop working? when wait until your dad gets home stops working? (lol) when taking away things stop working?

im actually really curious... i know some parents that could use some suggestions.Smile


Posted By: Samoneisthebest
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 2:07pm
Originally posted by Random Thoughts Random Thoughts wrote:

Originally posted by Wildfire Wildfire wrote:

Originally posted by Random Thoughts Random Thoughts wrote:

Does men spanking their daughters have a place in the home?




your question is unclear...



Fixed?

Basically, question posed to those who are pro-spanking. Are you cool with fathers spanking daughters?
I really don't know how I feel about it. My dad is a bodybuilder who is 6'2 250lbs. If he had ever even thought about hitting me I believe my mom would've had a fit. He raised his voice at me with too much bass once and I almost wet myself. My mom gave him the hardest side-eye lol

He never whooped me nor my older brother. We rarely got whoopings anyway. Only had to tell use not to do something once and that was that. We respected our parents and all they had to really do was look at us disapprovingly and we would be filled with shame. 

To this day the only thing that can make me cry instantly is thinking that I let my parents down.

I believe if you instill that early on whoopings aren't as necessary. Maybe a few but never a beat from a grown ass man like in the video.


If this were the same situation but the people he was beating were adult women no one would condone it. Children deserve to have their bodies respected also.


Posted By: maysay1
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 2:22pm
Originally posted by -Shesus- -Shesus- wrote:

I disagree.   I'm a lovey dovey type of parent.  I talk, yell, punish, restrict, & count b4 I hit.  I may even call my husband, sister, or mom if I feel its out of my hands.  But I will never call myself abusive.  Like I said previously, you can discipline w/o abuse.  My kids know they are safe with me.  Forever & always.  


Like I said, denial. Hitting=physical abuse. Someone who commits abuse=abuser/abusive.




Posted By: Missvw
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 2:27pm
Disgusting 


Posted By: Wildfire
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 2:29pm
Originally posted by maysay1 maysay1 wrote:



What do children learn from being hit by their parents?
-They learn that there is no unconditional love. That the people who are supposed to love them unconditionally, only love them until they make a mistake. Then they physically abuse them (and physical abuse can never equal love, no matter what we may convince ourselves).
-They learn that the two people who are supposed to protect them are actual people they should be afraid of.
-They learn that abuse and humiliation are the way to get people to do what you want them to do.



nope. never learnt any such thing.


Posted By: JoliePoufiasse
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 2:30pm
Originally posted by maysay1 maysay1 wrote:

Originally posted by -Shesus- -Shesus- wrote:

I disagree.   I'm a lovey dovey type of parent.  I talk, yell, punish, restrict, & count b4 I hit.  I may even call my husband, sister, or mom if I feel its out of my hands.  But I will never call myself abusive.  Like I said previously, you can discipline w/o abuse.  My kids know they are safe with me.  Forever & always.  


Like I said, denial. Hitting=physical abuse. Someone who commits abuse=abuser/abusive.


I've raised this topic on BHM before, maysay. Good luck trying to get SOME folks to understand that concept and the effects of slavery behind this behaviour and mindset


Posted By: bebe88
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 2:31pm
Originally posted by Midwest_Da_Gawd Midwest_Da_Gawd wrote:


That's a Black man who REFUSES to allow his daughters to
succumb to a life of whoredom and ratchetness. Most of these sisters out
here didn't have a father in their lives to nip that type of behavior
in the bud.

GOD BLESS THAT MAN! Beer


amen


Posted By: zolloh
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 2:31pm
This thread reminded me of the "disproportionate number of black kids in foster care" thread a few days ago...some excerpts Geek:
 
Originally posted by TiffanyinTX TiffanyinTX wrote:

But new studies show that black children die and are mistreated by family members more often than other kids. And instead of rooting out alleged racism, the county now faces a more nuanced and difficult task - getting into black neighborhoods and finding out how to best help children who are mistreated.

By almost every measure, black children in Los Angeles County, and California as a whole, are at far higher risk than other children.

On a national scale, the Fourth National Incidence Study of Child Abuse and Neglect released in 2011 found that children in black families are mistreated at a rate about 1.7 times the national average.

"In nearly all cases, the rates of maltreatment for black children were significantly higher than those for white and Hispanic children," the study found.

With all those risks at home, it's no wonder that so many black children end up in foster care, experts say.

Other studies show that black families use corporal punishment about 10 percent more often than parents from other ethnic groups.

Former foster child Marcellia Goodrich said she and other black foster youth were disciplined very severely in their birth homes. She was raised in South Los Angeles and now lives in Long Beach. She spent much of her childhood in foster care.

"I've been hit with a switch, a telephone, an extension cord," said Goodrich, 22.

 



Posted By: bunzaveli
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 2:32pm
Originally posted by Wildfire Wildfire wrote:

a father is a parent too
lol


Posted By: TokyoRose
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 2:33pm
I just can't understand what would possess someone to hit a child with an extension cord.  I think corporal punishment is okay--but only in very rare circumstances and when all other avenues have been exhausted.  The parent has to then be aware that once he/she hits his/her child, it may be very difficult to stop.


Posted By: bumble-boy
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 2:34pm
didnt read all these responses. the beating was more like an assault then disciplinary action. the children were too old for that type of beating. well the beating was too brutal at any age but at that older age it probably will cause the children to distance themselves and have the opposite effect not to mention thats probably not the first time he gave a beating like that and its most likely a common occurance from him.


Posted By: JoliePoufiasse
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 2:35pm
Originally posted by bebe88 bebe88 wrote:

[QUOTE=Midwest_Da_Gawd]
That's a Black man who REFUSES to allow his daughters to
succumb to a life of whoredom and ratchetness. Most of these sisters out
here didn't have a father in their lives to nip that type of behavior
in the bud.

GOD BLESS THAT MAN! Beer


That is the most idiotic thing I've ever read. If anything, what is most likely to happen is that his girls are going to experience difficulties forming secure attachments and understanding boundaries in a relationship. I know specifically of a family that was raised in this manner. One became a doctor and the other a prostitute. Literally.


Posted By: dOLLish.
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 2:36pm
Originally posted by Wildfire Wildfire wrote:

Originally posted by maysay1 maysay1 wrote:



What do children learn from being hit by their parents?
-They learn that there is no unconditional love. That the people who are supposed to love them unconditionally, only love them until they make a mistake. Then they physically abuse them (and physical abuse can never equal love, no matter what we may convince ourselves).
-They learn that the two people who are supposed to protect them are actual people they should be afraid of.
-They learn that abuse and humiliation are the way to get people to do what you want them to do.



nope. never learnt any such thing.

+ 1

My siblings and I were physically disciplined by our mother and we never "learned" any of that.  I believe that there is a fine line between discipline and abuse. 

I believe that some of these children, especially those of today's generation, need their asses beat.  *shrugs*


Posted By: BBpants
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 2:36pm
Wow.....That was disturbing. I got beat plenty of times but never with a cord. Sometimes with a hair brush...or a spoon...or a broom...even a shoe but never a cord. That looked like it will leave big welts.

It's also disturbing that some of yall can look at this and see this as normal....That's very sad.
 


Posted By: Adrian
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 2:38pm
Dead 
 
Maybe he should get a whopping...


Posted By: Wildfire
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 2:38pm
Originally posted by BBpants BBpants wrote:

Wow.....That was disturbing. I got beat plenty of times but never with a cord. Sometimes with a hair brush...or a spoon...or a broom...even a shoe but never a cord. That looked like it will leave big welts.

It's also disturbing that some of yall can look at this and see this as normal....That's very sad.
 


tha hell???LOLCry


Posted By: JoliePoufiasse
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 2:39pm
Originally posted by dOLLish. dOLLish. wrote:

Originally posted by Wildfire Wildfire wrote:

Originally posted by maysay1 maysay1 wrote:



What do children learn from being hit by their parents?
-They learn that there is no unconditional love. That the people who are supposed to love them unconditionally, only love them until they make a mistake. Then they physically abuse them (and physical abuse can never equal love, no matter what we may convince ourselves).
-They learn that the two people who are supposed to protect them are actual people they should be afraid of.
-They learn that abuse and humiliation are the way to get people to do what you want them to do.



nope. never learnt any such thing.

+ 1

My siblings and I were physically disciplined by our mother and we never "learned" any of that.  I believe that there is a fine line between discipline and abuse. 

I believe that some of these children, especially those of today's generation, need their asses beat.  *shrugs*

My father "disciplined" me like that growing up and I've carried the emotional scars for a long time. Some don't even realize that they carry those scars until because that is all they know, are used to it or see it replicated withing the community and assume it's normal. It's not.



Posted By: CamiK
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 2:41pm
Originally posted by Samoneisthebest Samoneisthebest wrote:

My step dad use to come up with some creative way to discipline me since he didn't want to spank me. The one I hated the most was when he was like "Hold your arms out to your sides until I say put em down"

It would only be like a minute but my shoulders would be on fiya LOL 

I think I might use that form of dicipline. My kids gonna be some in shape mofos.

Yes!! My older sis would do this instead of passing out beatings. She would say "hold up the wall" and make the kids hold their arms up at an angle and say "you better not let that wall fall"...lol.  Kids would be apologetic as if they got a beating and crying...but she never layed a hand on themWink...

That type of sh*t never happend to me though...my momma aint play that,plus I was an angelTongue...


Posted By: Wildfire
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 2:41pm
Originally posted by JoliePoufiasse JoliePoufiasse wrote:



 If anything, what is most likely to happen is that his girls are going to experience difficulties forming secure attachments and understanding boundaries in a relationship. I know specifically of a family that was raised in this manner. One became a doctor and the other a prostitute. Literally.


stop confabulating with clear folk











Posted By: Wildfire
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 2:42pm
Originally posted by JoliePoufiasse JoliePoufiasse wrote:

Originally posted by dOLLish. dOLLish. wrote:

Originally posted by Wildfire Wildfire wrote:

Originally posted by maysay1 maysay1 wrote:



What do children learn from being hit by their parents?
-They learn that there is no unconditional love. That the people who are supposed to love them unconditionally, only love them until they make a mistake. Then they physically abuse them (and physical abuse can never equal love, no matter what we may convince ourselves).
-They learn that the two people who are supposed to protect them are actual people they should be afraid of.
-They learn that abuse and humiliation are the way to get people to do what you want them to do.



nope. never learnt any such thing.

+ 1

My siblings and I were physically disciplined by our mother and we never "learned" any of that.  I believe that there is a fine line between discipline and abuse. 

I believe that some of these children, especially those of today's generation, need their asses beat.  *shrugs*

My father "disciplined" me like that growing up and I've carried the emotional scars for a long time. Some don't even realize that they carry those scars until because that is all they know, are used to it or see it replicated withing the community and assume it's normal. It's not.



So youre speaking for yourself. no scars here.







Posted By: JoliePoufiasse
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 2:43pm
Originally posted by Wildfire Wildfire wrote:

Originally posted by JoliePoufiasse JoliePoufiasse wrote:



 If anything, what is most likely to happen is that his girls are going to experience difficulties forming secure attachments and understanding boundaries in a relationship. I know specifically of a family that was raised in this manner. One became a doctor and the other a prostitute. Literally.


stop confabulating with clear folk









Jesus... That is such a sad answer. Throw logic out the window like that. Serious denial.


Posted By: BBpants
Date Posted: Mar 31 2013 at 2:44pm
Originally posted by Wildfire Wildfire wrote:

Originally posted by BBpants BBpants wrote:

Wow.....That was disturbing. I got beat plenty of times but never with a cord. Sometimes with a hair brush...or a spoon...or a broom...even a shoe but never a cord. That looked like it will leave big welts.

It's also disturbing that some of yall can look at this and see this as normal....That's very sad.
 


tha hell???LOLCry


You never got popped with a wooden spoon before ? LOL My mom would pop me on my head with it when we were in the kitchen and I was doing something bad.



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