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What say You....

Printed From: Black Hair Media Forum
Category: Lets Talk
Forum Name: Talk, Talk, and More Talk
Forum Description: In this Forum, the talk is about everything that can be talked about.
URL: http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/forum_posts.asp?TID=354436
Printed Date: Aug 18 2018 at 4:49pm


Topic: What say You....
Posted By: Gkisses
Subject: What say You....
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 1:02am
Tim and Keisha have been dating for about a year.
They met through an online dating website
All is going well except for two things

1. Keisha has never met his parents...
She recently asked him when he was going to finally introduce me to them and his answer was" nahh uh!" His reason was because his last girlfriend he brought over to meet them, they hated her..and because of that.. he wont bring g/f over to meet his parents..



2- Tim still wont be facebook friends with Keisha
His reasoning for that : it causes too much drama and he had relationships go bad because of it, Tim's fb profile is so private, you cant even see any pictures.
 
They do spend a lot of quality time together practically every day... and every weekend.

Would u consider not meeting someones parents after a certain length of time a Red Flag? If ur SO wouldnt add you on FB a Red Flag?

What say you


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Replies:
Posted By: pattigurlatl
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 1:04am
I say Tim is white.

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Harriet Tubman - I freed a thousands slaves. I would have freed more had they known they were slaves.

Michael Harriot - She wouldn't have freed any if she was worried about her hair.


Posted By: Flowing-Ice
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 1:05am
they should break up. 

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And Jean Paul Gaultier and a Hermes bag and four inch tips made of ostrich ;Sharp enough to slit your wrists her lips spread gossip ;Won't say sorry when she offends


Posted By: Gkisses
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 1:06am
Originally posted by pattigurlatl pattigurlatl wrote:

I say Tim is white.


Its not an IR relationship..lol


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Posted By: nycdiva357
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 1:08am
that nygguh aint ya nygguh unless he endorse u

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He follows what I'm saying.. I aint gotta twitter shyt.


Posted By: rell85
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 1:09am
tim have a gf ok i see him not wanting to add her on fb but he could let her take a look at it. when you keep asking some1 questions and all you get is excuses something not right.


Posted By: Lady ICE
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 1:09am
i can see both sides...especially that fb thing. lol..im never friends with my bf's online neither..not that anythings happening...i just dont want you everywhere that i am. LOL


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Posted By: BBpants
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 1:09am
Not meeting the parents after a certain time is a red flag....That's one of the many reasons why I dumped my ex. 

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yo


Posted By: niecy
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 1:11am
Her ass is just a fling that he ain't tryna claim and/or he married.


Posted By: Bored w/Out Me?
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 1:12am
Tim sounds like a commitment phobe who'll be on to the next chick as soon as he's bored w/Keish...


Posted By: EPITOME
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 1:12am
he hates her

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I'm from The Wishanicca Woods boo-Dreamz

If you are or have ever been a member of BHM, you are inherently a hoodrat.B


Posted By: Gkisses
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 1:13am
The guy I was in my longest relationship with never met my folks....I never asked to meet his either..... Unless we about to get married or summin I dont line those lines to cross... I barely bring them around my sibs... if he was just a friend that would be diff but even then theres a wait period...lol


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Posted By: pattigurlatl
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 1:14am
If he ain't white, he's married, if he ain't married, he's a closeted gay.

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Harriet Tubman - I freed a thousands slaves. I would have freed more had they known they were slaves.

Michael Harriot - She wouldn't have freed any if she was worried about her hair.


Posted By: Gkisses
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 1:16am
It was suggested to Keisha that she  tell Tim to add her or delete his FB page.

Is this a reasonable suggestion ?


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Posted By: Limalady
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 1:16am
Tim has a main chick or a wife.


Posted By: ms_wonderland
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 1:19am
i mean, i'm never in a rush for a guy i'm with to meet my family so I can see this being realistic.  I wouldn't say no if it was really pressed but it probably wouldn't happen until a major holiday or something.

the FB thing is the red flag to me...she's either ugly or he's cheating.


Posted By: Lady ICE
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 1:19am
Originally posted by Gkisses Gkisses wrote:

The guy I was in my longest relationship with never met my folks....I never asked to meet his either..... Unless we about to get married or summin I dont line those lines to cross... I barely bring them around my sibs... if he was just a friend that would be diff but even then theres a wait period...lol
yeah same thing happened here. at the time to be honest i never really cared about meeting them. *shrug* weird thing now that we got to know each other i like his parents more than him. life is so funny sometimes.LOL


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Posted By: BBpants
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 1:21am
Originally posted by Gkisses Gkisses wrote:

It was suggested to Keisha that she  tell Tim to add her or delete his FB page.

Is this a reasonable suggestion ?


LOL @ delete his fb cuz he don't want to add her. If I was Tim, laugh in her face for suggesting that LOL


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yo


Posted By: Limalady
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 1:22am
Originally posted by Gkisses Gkisses wrote:

It was suggested to Keisha that she  tell Tim to add her or delete his FB page.

Is this a reasonable suggestion ?




This is a huge red flag to me, the whole won't add her on Facebook thing. I think he has a wife or gf. If she makes an ultimatum, he may just make another Facebook page. He sounds untrustworthy to me.

On the other hand, maybe avoiding the Facebook is better. My SO's mom, nephews and friends all added me after he did.


Posted By: ms_wonderland
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 1:25am
would a guy with a wife/serious gf have time to hang out everyday though?  where do people find the time?  when he's not bringing home a fat check, where does he claim his time is going?


Posted By: Limalady
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 1:27am
Originally posted by ms_wonderland ms_wonderland wrote:

would a guy with a wife/serious gf have time to hang out everyday though?  where do people find the time?  when he's not bringing home a fat check, where does he claim his time is going?


It happens. He tells her that he is with friends or working late. Availability doesn't mean he isn't cheating.


Posted By: ms_wonderland
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 1:29am
Originally posted by Limalady Limalady wrote:

Originally posted by ms_wonderland ms_wonderland wrote:

would a guy with a wife/serious gf have time to hang out everyday though?  where do people find the time?  when he's not bringing home a fat check, where does he claim his time is going?


It happens. He tells her that he is with friends or working late. That doesn't mean anything.

it's so weird to have so many unaccounted for hours.  my radar would've been going off as a wife.  a year?  smh.  


Posted By: Limalady
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 1:30am
Originally posted by ms_wonderland ms_wonderland wrote:


Originally posted by Limalady Limalady wrote:

Originally posted by ms_wonderland ms_wonderland wrote:

would a guy with a wife/serious gf have time to hang out everyday though?  where do people find the time?  when he's not bringing home a fat check, where does he claim his time is going?


It happens. He tells her that he is with friends or working late. That doesn't mean anything.


it's so weird to have so many unaccounted for hours.  my radar would've been going off as a wife.  a year?  smh.  


True. Well let's say I have a friend that experienced this. The wife stayed with the cheater, but stalked the other woman.


Posted By: Bored w/Out Me?
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 1:39am
Originally posted by Gkisses Gkisses wrote:

It was suggested to Keisha that she  tell Tim to add her or delete his FB page.

Is this a reasonable suggestion ?





When she does, it'll be over via text....


Posted By: Gkisses
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 2:08am
Originally posted by Limalady Limalady wrote:

Originally posted by Gkisses Gkisses wrote:

It was suggested to Keisha that she  tell Tim to add her or delete his FB page.

Is this a reasonable suggestion ?




This is a huge red flag to me, the whole won't add her on Facebook thing. I think he has a wife or gf. If she makes an ultimatum, he may just make another Facebook page. He sounds untrustworthy to me.

On the other hand, maybe avoiding the Facebook is better. My SO's mom, nephews and friends all added me after he did.



UGH!...My brothers ex tried to add me ....she got iced!...lol wasnt adding that mess lol LOL


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Posted By: Cream1970
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 8:01am
She's a side piece. When a man is really feeling you, he wants the WORLD to know.

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Posted By: Mixer
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 8:57am
My girlfriend would never meet my parents.

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The CHOGH crew...

President honeybee10

oh_so_moody

afrokock

Mixer

colemrlch

ummmok

niecy

313chick

AffirmativeBunny

Anah

HeyBeautiful


Posted By: beebeexx
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 9:07am
she need not give him ultimatums. if anything he could just block her and make it look deleted.
if she keeps going he/the situation is just gonna make her crazy and damage her trust on future relationships. not worth it. year in or not she probably wasnt gonna marry this man anyway so why mess up who you are on the inside over him?

my advice is for her to cut him loose. tell him things don't feel right and these are the reasons ...


Posted By: sugabanana
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 9:10am
He's on the down low or the wife is in the military!!! You can tell alot about a person from their face book. 

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Russell hired me to police those who STAR these non-sensical threads!!!He said I should feel free to point them out!!


Posted By: _leah
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 9:19am
The whole fb thing, I added my bf then all his friends were adding me his momma was on there. 

One time I put up a status about "My baby daddy needing to know how to braid" 

She went off and was blowing up his phone asking if i was pregnant lol funny funny. 


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"lol thats not BABY hair , thats grown up hair , that moved out into a place of her own with childern ."

By the grace of God, I am a complete woman.


Posted By: goodm3
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 9:29am
I would never be friends with my SO on fb. 1- because ppl are too nosey .... 2- i use Facebook to network with people who match my current interest not to catch up with classmates.


Posted By: Mixer
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 9:29am


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The CHOGH crew...

President honeybee10

oh_so_moody

afrokock

Mixer

colemrlch

ummmok

niecy

313chick

AffirmativeBunny

Anah

HeyBeautiful


Posted By: goodm3
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 9:29am
Originally posted by _leah _leah wrote:

The whole fb thing, I added my bf then all his friends were adding me his momma was on there. 

One time I put up a status about "My baby daddy needing to know how to braid" 

She went off and was blowing up his phone asking if i was pregnant lol funny funny. 

this is another reason why i won't add him. LOL


Posted By: keepgrowing
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 9:38am
Keisha is getting the Ashanti treatment. they together but not together. u can be friends on fb with ur SO. doesn't mean you have to put up statuses of in a relationship. i hate putting up relationship statuses. i can understand not meeting parents, but i rly don't understand not being friends with your SO on fb Confused

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You can't just walk in with a huge banana and expect everything to be peaches.

If you no know me brotha, I no like wahala.


Posted By: Derri
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 9:58am
I have been with my SO for years. We plan to marry each other.
We aint FB friends and we never will be.



Posted By: ThoughtCouture
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 11:06am

if you ain't on your so's emergency contact list or at least know their emergency contact very well...you really aint that important...



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you say i need some time to meditate...naaaaah b*tch i'm fly! i need time to levitate... ~yeezy


dacoldesteva


Posted By: *Belle*Femme*
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 11:11am
Originally posted by niecy niecy wrote:

Her ass is just a fling that he ain't tryna claim and/or he married.


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My mind explodes


Posted By: ThoughtCouture
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 11:19am
also, i'm really trynna understand the big woop with fb.  it seems to me one would have drama on there if they have drama in real life.  i have over a thousand friends, and the majority of all my exes are still friends.  none of my shyt is locked down (been this way since fb started) and i have yet to ever ever have any fb drama...
 
the one ex who removed me as a friend is a bonifide whore who is STILL trying to get some of this to this day damn near 10 years later...lol, so i'm sure he thought/thinks his heaux will bust him out...lol....
 
if a man tells me he is tyring to avoid drama on fb...he gets an auto side eye from me...shrugs...


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you say i need some time to meditate...naaaaah b*tch i'm fly! i need time to levitate... ~yeezy


dacoldesteva


Posted By: Sang Froid
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 11:34am
Lol. Ain't nobody meeting my family until we're engaged.
I guess that means I cheat or hate the people I date. 


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Posted By: goodm3
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 11:38am
Originally posted by Sang Froid Sang Froid wrote:

Lol. Ain't nobody meeting my family until we're engaged.
I guess that means I cheat or hate the people I date. 

OKKKKKKKKKAAAAAAYYYYYY!

 My SO would of course meet my parents beforehand but everyone else will catch us in the wind. 


Posted By: Gkisses
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 11:43am
Family members on FB only add SO's to be nosey. I guess my compromise for the situation would be to add her but not having the relationship status up or at least not with whom. But seeing how this is bothering Keisha she seems like the type that would let it be known up and down his wall that she was dating him..lol which would defeat the purpose of not having the status up there.


Theres a lot of dudes out there that "claim" a chick but her value/importance to them is still low...known "wifeys" get fuc'd over daily


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Posted By: tropical-punch
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 11:48am
I don't see the issue here.


Posted By: ThoughtCouture
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 12:05pm
Originally posted by Sang Froid Sang Froid wrote:

Lol. Ain't nobody meeting my family until we're engaged.
 
really?  why?


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you say i need some time to meditate...naaaaah b*tch i'm fly! i need time to levitate... ~yeezy


dacoldesteva


Posted By: DWeird
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 1:12pm
I agree I don't want any unnecessary attachments forming. We might need to break up and I like clean breaks. Not meeting the parents isn't necessarily a red flag.

I think the FB situation is fishy tho. If a relationship actually ended because of it, that says to me he was cheating and got caught. 


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Posted By: Sang Froid
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 1:17pm
Originally posted by ThoughtCouture ThoughtCouture wrote:

Originally posted by Sang Froid Sang Froid wrote:

Lol. Ain't nobody meeting my family until we're engaged.
 
really?  why?

A boyfriend ain't important enough to meet them. 


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Posted By: ThoughtCouture
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 1:23pm
^^would you ever want to spend the holidays with your serious boyfriend (not engaged)?
 
if so, i'm just trying to understand how that would work in your world.  you spend a few hours together then go about your seperate ways to spend time with family?
 
 


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you say i need some time to meditate...naaaaah b*tch i'm fly! i need time to levitate... ~yeezy


dacoldesteva


Posted By: Gkisses
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 1:34pm
Ive met the family members of bfs they have not met mines. They know of them because I talk about them but thats it. I know some have felt some sorta way about it but I always tell them I am very protective of my family. They are the heart of the onion and u gotta work ur way through in order to reach that layer. My family know that Im dating someone would know what they look like name and all that jazz but they dont press the issue either because they trust my judgement. When you meet my folks and sibs you gotta have a certain training to within stand whats coming LOL




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Posted By: Gkisses
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 1:35pm
Originally posted by ThoughtCouture ThoughtCouture wrote:

^^would you ever want to spend the holidays with your serious boyfriend (not engaged)?
 
if so, i'm just trying to understand how that would work in your world.  you spend a few hours together then go about your seperate ways to spend time with family?
 
 



We have our own days set aside....for that




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Posted By: PurplePhase
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 1:36pm
I don't think it's a big deal not to have met the family.

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PEACE


Posted By: Sang Froid
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 1:37pm
Originally posted by ThoughtCouture ThoughtCouture wrote:

^^would you ever want to spend the holidays with your serious boyfriend (not engaged)?
 
if so, i'm just trying to understand how that would work in your world.  you spend a few hours together then go about your seperate ways to spend time with family?

I most likely won't even live in the same city as my family.....and I hate holidays. 


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Posted By: ThoughtCouture
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 2:01pm
oh ok sang.  family is very important to me and i'd want a mate who feels the same.   i've always lived around my family.  and when i didn't, i hated it. 
 
i can't see dating someone i care about long term and having to avoid meeting families.
 
and even tho most of my exes families love me to death, i also respect boundaries (and vice versa) when/if it is over...


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you say i need some time to meditate...naaaaah b*tch i'm fly! i need time to levitate... ~yeezy


dacoldesteva



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