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i hate cheaters...and i hate my nosey a*s...

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Category: Lets Talk
Forum Name: Talk, Talk, and More Talk
Forum Description: In this Forum, the talk is about everything that can be talked about.
URL: http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/forum_posts.asp?TID=354417
Printed Date: Jul 16 2018 at 8:42pm


Topic: i hate cheaters...and i hate my nosey a*s...
Posted By: ms_wonderland
Subject: i hate cheaters...and i hate my nosey a*s...
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 5:38pm
There's a couple that I've been getting close to the past 6 mths.  I really like the guy and I really, really like the girl.  they're just a really chill, cute couple in a super LTR.  they just had a baby in December.

So, I get home and decide to check my gmail.  For anyone with gmail, you know that when you go to gmail.com, if there is an account already signed in, the website goes directly to the inbox...and all emails on the first page are exposed.

It was his email signed in.  I forgot that he had used my computer last night and had been looking up jobs and stuff.  Those were the first 3 emails....

I was about to log out but the woman in me just couldn't because I immediately noticed the hookup websites he had an account with...responses from sexual sounding usernames all on the 1st pg...so i thought about it for a while, then i decided to be nosey because i really like his girlfriend...

now i regret looking because i saw things i really wish i hadn't and i knew i wasn't going to say shyt anyway and i was just being bored...but now i'm just like SleepySleepySleepySleepy damn myself.

eta: based on the emails i saw, he is definitely cheating offline.








Replies:
Posted By: Rumbera
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 5:40pm
Well, what exactly in detail did you find out ? Geek


Posted By: mizzsandra00
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 5:42pm
I aint gon lie.......I would have too........LOL

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When I read some of the post on BHM.


Posted By: CamiK
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 5:43pm
Forward the emails to her...start some drama

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Last thing I wanna do is hurt you, but its still on my list..


Posted By: ms_wonderland
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 5:44pm
Originally posted by Rumbera Rumbera wrote:

Well, what exactly in detail did you find out ? Geek

he was talking to one girl about what they were going to do when they meet up.  he was arranging to meet up with another girl who sent her number and a nude...he emailed like 2 diff girls his phone number....

i didn't see any proof of offline stuff but that's bc they probably text and talk on the phone once they meet.  

i am really sad b/c i thought they were such a cute couple...i guess i knew something was off when he spent christmas at my place and nye...but theyre very much together.


Posted By: ms_wonderland
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 5:45pm
Originally posted by CamiK CamiK wrote:

Forward the emails to her...start some drama

lol so everyone can be mad at me?  


Posted By: mizzsandra00
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 5:46pm
He tryna holla wonderland......and you don't even see it........

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When I read some of the post on BHM.


Posted By: Rumbera
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 5:46pm
I would tell her.


Posted By: ms_wonderland
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 5:47pm
Originally posted by mizzsandra00 mizzsandra00 wrote:

He tryna holla wonderland......and you don't even see it........

lol noo, i never hang out with him alone...it's always a group of us.





Posted By: ms_wonderland
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 5:49pm
Originally posted by Rumbera Rumbera wrote:

I would tell her.

i am not good at these type of confrontations...im gonna look like the new person in the group causing trouble with ppl who have been tight since high school.

she doesn't seem like the type that would be ok with this...maybe he's having a moment b/c the sex is less with the new baby around. Confused


Posted By: Rumbera
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 5:49pm
Maybe he left it open to feel you out..Stern Smile


Posted By: BBpants
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 5:49pm
I don't know how you would explain looking at his email without looking like a creep if you told her LOL


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yo


Posted By: CamiK
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 5:53pm
Talk to him, help him change his ways...im just throwing out ideas btw...

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Last thing I wanna do is hurt you, but its still on my list..


Posted By: mizzsandra00
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 5:53pm
Originally posted by ms_wonderland ms_wonderland wrote:

Originally posted by mizzsandra00 mizzsandra00 wrote:

He tryna holla wonderland......and you don't even see it........

lol noo, i never hang out with him alone...it's always a group of us.





He waiting......LOL


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When I read some of the post on BHM.


Posted By: maysay1
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 5:54pm
Thought you were talking about keek for a min there...

I would get the info to her anonymously (I probably wouldve just forwarded the emails) and keep being friends with her.


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"Men are f*ckers until proven otherwise with a certificate from three separate independent witnesses, two goddesses and your deepest gut feeling."


Posted By: Rumbera
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 5:55pm
Well, she probably will not believe you. So, maybe you can bring it up to him and scare him straight....lol
 
You've only known them  for 6 months, so yeah.


Posted By: ms_wonderland
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 5:58pm
Originally posted by maysay1 maysay1 wrote:

Thought you were talking about keek for a min there...

I would get the info to her anonymously (I probably wouldve just forwarded the emails) and keep being friends with her.

LMFAO...nooooooo...her baby is almost a year and so cute!!!!


i already signed out of his email bc i really really needed to check my own.
i think anonymous forwarding would be the only way i could do it.  i'll have to wait for another opportunity.




Posted By: *Belle*Femme*
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 6:02pm
maaaaaannnn you've only known those people for 6 months. Mind your damn business and let that woman find out on her own. When she finds out then you can say you knew all along but its not your place to be saying things. Don't worry, he'll forget to sign off on her computer one day and she will read the same emails honey. Trust me. 

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My mind explodes


Posted By: CamiK
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 6:04pm
I say tell her..He could possibly bring her back an std..obviously they are't using protection... you could be saving her lifeGeek

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Last thing I wanna do is hurt you, but its still on my list..


Posted By: mizzsandra00
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 6:04pm
Originally posted by *Belle*Femme* *Belle*Femme* wrote:

maaaaaannnn you've only known those people for 6 months. Mind your damn business and let that woman find out on her own. When she finds out then you can say you knew all along but its not your place to be saying things. Don't worry, he'll forget to sign off on her computer one day and she will read the same emails honey. Trust me. 


Best advice.


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When I read some of the post on BHM.


Posted By: ms_wonderland
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 6:05pm
Originally posted by *Belle*Femme* *Belle*Femme* wrote:

maaaaaannnn you've only known those people for 6 months. Mind your damn business and let that woman find out on her own. When she finds out then you can say you knew all along but its not your place to be saying things. Don't worry, he'll forget to sign off on her computer one day and she will read the same emails honey. Trust me. 

the first part is why i knew i shouldve just left it alone but gah...we spend a lot of time together bc hes my bf's really close friend.

and yeah, he will eventually get caught up.  i hope it's soon though...i don't want her catching any fleas from his dog ass.


Posted By: texasmami0117
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 6:07pm
I would bring it up to him.
 
I hate social media these days. It makes it so easy to cheat online and offline.


Posted By: Rumbera
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 6:08pm
Originally posted by ms_wonderland ms_wonderland wrote:

Originally posted by maysay1 maysay1 wrote:

Thought you were talking about keek for a min there...

I would get the info to her anonymously (I probably wouldve just forwarded the emails) and keep being friends with her.

LMFAO...nooooooo...her baby is almost a year and so cute!!!!


i already signed out of his email bc i really really needed to check my own.
i think anonymous forwarding would be the only way i could do it.  i'll have to wait for another opportunity.


 
*rookie*
 
forward that ish to your email 1st then log out..
 
*shakes head*


Posted By: ms_wonderland
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 6:08pm
Originally posted by CamiK CamiK wrote:

I say tell her..He could possibly bring her back an std..obviously they are't using protection... you could be saving her lifeGeek

lol you just want an update full of drama.  tryna get me killed.


Posted By: Ladybird0724
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 6:10pm
Originally posted by ms_wonderland ms_wonderland wrote:

Originally posted by *Belle*Femme* *Belle*Femme* wrote:

maaaaaannnn you've only known those people for 6 months. Mind your damn business and let that woman find out on her own. When she finds out then you can say you knew all along but its not your place to be saying things. Don't worry, he'll forget to sign off on her computer one day and she will read the same emails honey. Trust me. 

the first part is why i knew i shouldve just left it alone but gah...we spend a lot of time together bc hes my bf's really close friend.

and yeah, he will eventually get caught up.  i hope it's soon though...i don't want her catching any fleas from his dog ass.


did you say anything to your bf about it?


-------------
It is said it takes seven years
to grow completely new skin cells.
To think, this year I will grow
into a body you never will
have touched.
— Brett Elizabeth Jenkins


Posted By: melikey
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 6:12pm
if he's dumb enough not to log-off, i'm sure she knows

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shine your light for the world to see


Posted By: texasmami0117
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 6:12pm
^^^oh yeah...if it's his friend then he can bring it up


Posted By: ms_wonderland
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 6:13pm
Originally posted by Ladybird0724 Ladybird0724 wrote:

Originally posted by ms_wonderland ms_wonderland wrote:

Originally posted by *Belle*Femme* *Belle*Femme* wrote:

maaaaaannnn you've only known those people for 6 months. Mind your damn business and let that woman find out on her own. When she finds out then you can say you knew all along but its not your place to be saying things. Don't worry, he'll forget to sign off on her computer one day and she will read the same emails honey. Trust me. 

the first part is why i knew i shouldve just left it alone but gah...we spend a lot of time together bc hes my bf's really close friend.

and yeah, he will eventually get caught up.  i hope it's soon though...i don't want her catching any fleas from his dog ass.


did you say anything to your bf about it?

not yet...i'm waiting for him to wake up.


Posted By: CamiK
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 6:16pm
Originally posted by ms_wonderland ms_wonderland wrote:

Originally posted by CamiK CamiK wrote:

I say tell her..He could possibly bring her back an std..obviously they are't using protection... you could be saving her lifeGeek

lol you just want an update full of drama.  tryna get me killed.

ErmmFine.Don't tell her then,just know if anything happens to her,you could have prevented it...had you taken CAMIK"S advice...


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Last thing I wanna do is hurt you, but its still on my list..


Posted By: Ladybird0724
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 6:20pm
Originally posted by texasmami0117 texasmami0117 wrote:

^^^oh yeah...if it's his friend then he can bring it up


this is what i was thinking.


-------------
It is said it takes seven years
to grow completely new skin cells.
To think, this year I will grow
into a body you never will
have touched.
— Brett Elizabeth Jenkins


Posted By: ms_wonderland
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 6:23pm
tbh, if he does bring it up he's not going to like shame him...he might be like, "*** is a good girl, u shouldnt be doin that"...but that's as far as it'll go.  


Posted By: Ladybird0724
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 6:35pm
Originally posted by ms_wonderland ms_wonderland wrote:

tbh, if he does bring it up he's not going to like shame him...he might be like, "*** is a good girl, u shouldnt be doin that"...but that's as far as it'll go.  



even that would be better coming from him than anything coming from you, tbh. like you said earlier, you're new to the group and it would be as if you're starting drama, even if it's coming from a place of real concern for the girl.

do you think the girl should know? what do you think is the best outcome for the situation?


-------------
It is said it takes seven years
to grow completely new skin cells.
To think, this year I will grow
into a body you never will
have touched.
— Brett Elizabeth Jenkins


Posted By: ms_wonderland
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 6:38pm
Originally posted by Ladybird0724 Ladybird0724 wrote:

Originally posted by ms_wonderland ms_wonderland wrote:

tbh, if he does bring it up he's not going to like shame him...he might be like, "*** is a good girl, u shouldnt be doin that"...but that's as far as it'll go.  



even that would be better coming from him than anything coming from you, tbh. like you said earlier, you're new to the group and it would be as if you're starting drama, even if it's coming from a place of real concern for the girl.

do you think the girl should know? what do you think is the best outcome for the situation?

i think she should know b/c based on conversations i've had with her, i know what she wants and expects from her relationship...even though i haven't known her long, i guess i feel added empathy b/c she's one of the 1st friends i made here and she was easy to get along with.

i don't know what the best thing would be which is why i wish i never looked!! Cry


Posted By: sache1991
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 6:43pm
Originally posted by ms_wonderland ms_wonderland wrote:

There's a couple that I've been getting close to the past 6 mths.  I really like the guy and I really, really like the girl.  they're just a really chill, cute couple in a super LTR.  they just had a baby in December.

So, I get home and decide to check my gmail.  For anyone with gmail, you know that when you go to gmail.com, if there is an account already signed in, the website goes directly to the inbox...and all emails on the first page are exposed.

It was his email signed in.  I forgot that he had used my computer last night and had been looking up jobs and stuff.  Those were the first 3 emails....

I was about to log out but the woman in me just couldn't because I immediately noticed the hookup websites he had an account with...responses from sexual sounding usernames all on the 1st pg...so i thought about it for a while, then i decided to be nosey because i really like his girlfriend...

now i regret looking because i saw things i really wish i hadn't and i knew i wasn't going to say shyt anyway and i was just being bored...but now i'm just like SleepySleepySleepySleepy damn myself.

eta: based on the emails i saw, he is definitely cheating offline.






You in a open relationship with this couple? DeadConfused


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Posted By: sugabanana
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 6:46pm
Girl you don't have to say a daggone word. Play like you don't know anything and keep your laptop open the next time you guys hang out. When he logs on and forgets to log off then pass the laptop to the girl friend and ask her if she wants to use the laptop before you log on the BHM, that you will be a while. Most likely she will say no she doesn't need to use it....Just drop the laptop in her lap.

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Russell hired me to police those who STAR these non-sensical threads!!!He said I should feel free to point them out!!


Posted By: ms_wonderland
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 6:50pm
sache, don't bring that switch hitting shyt u into, into my thread. Sleepy


Posted By: texasmami0117
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 6:52pm
Originally posted by Ladybird0724 Ladybird0724 wrote:

Originally posted by ms_wonderland ms_wonderland wrote:

tbh, if he does bring it up he's not going to like shame him...he might be like, "*** is a good girl, u shouldnt be doin that"...but that's as far as it'll go.  



even that would be better coming from him than anything coming from you, tbh. like you said earlier, you're new to the group and it would be as if you're starting drama, even if it's coming from a place of real concern for the girl.

do you think the girl should know? what do you think is the best outcome for the situation?
 
if you're bf does that you might save the relationship. telling her might break up that family. it will mean more coming from a guy too.


Posted By: india100
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 6:52pm
The baby was born december 2012 right, which would equal 3 months old ? The dog was cheating all along . I despise men that cheat on pregnant women . Stay out of it sweetie and only deal with her . Her hormones are all over the place .
 
 
The women will go off on him and stay in the relationship . I would consider stepping away from both to avoid future things you may find out . I hope she will find out soon and leave before he ruins her life over some other stank Heffa .

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God will never let you down.
Avi.. Bobby Brown and brother Tommy after singing at MY DAD Funeral. RIP..


Posted By: creole booty
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 6:55pm
Forward the emails to urself. Keep proof. Delete the forwarded emails from his sent box. Stay quiet, until the time is right. She might be doing dirt too. They might have an open relationship. Wait and gather information. When u have enough info, then make a decision.

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i lost all my baby weight: )


Posted By: PurplePhase
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 6:59pm
that's a tough one since you aren't friends. If it was a friend I'd tell . I'd probably find a way to tell her or let her find out anyway if it was someone I was trying to build a friendship with. Putting myself in her place, I'd want her to tell me. It's hard to know when to tell though and you have to be willing to risk fallout from  'the telling.'

Sort of reminds me of another dilemma I faced-- if you overhear something do you keep it to yourself? By overhear, I mean a married someone unknowingly left a full-disclosure conversation about their affair on your voicemail . Keep it to yourself?


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PEACE


Posted By: sugabanana
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 7:04pm
Ms. Wonderland your not a friend to the girl your a friend to both of them. Don't go out of your way to split the two of them up. You have to consider the child. He willbe dumb again and leave his email up. I'm sure she probably knows if she looks into his phone.

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Russell hired me to police those who STAR these non-sensical threads!!!He said I should feel free to point them out!!


Posted By: ms_wonderland
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 7:10pm
Originally posted by india100 india100 wrote:

The baby was born december 2012 right, which would equal 3 months old ? The dog was cheating all along . I despise men that cheat on pregnant women . Stay out of it sweetie and only deal with her . Her hormones are all over the place .
 
 
The women will go off on him and stay in the relationship . I would consider stepping away from both to avoid future things you may find out . I hope she will find out soon and leave before he ruins her life over some other stank Heffa .

yep...2012....it makes me look at him like ugh...made me cynical all over again.

@purple...i would want to be told too...but i would be apprehensive if someone i was getting to know told me something like that.  we're all going bowling on Monday so it'll be awkward.  


Posted By: ms_wonderland
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 7:11pm
Originally posted by sugabanana sugabanana wrote:

Ms. Wonderland your not a friend to the girl your a friend to both of them. Don't go out of your way to split the two of them up. You have to consider the child. He willbe dumb again and leave his email up. I'm sure she probably knows if she looks into his phone.

i definitely won't go out of my way to do that.  i will just have to let it simmer...if he;s newly cheating, he will keep making mistakes.  


Posted By: PurplePhase
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 7:24pm
I was told by someone who wasn't really a friend (totally different situation). It bonded me to her because I was mad at my 'friends' who knew and didn't tell me. It made me respect her. She basically said, believe it or  not but I'm telling you. I believed her  even though what she was saying was kinda unbelievable lol. (it was true)




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PEACE


Posted By: Majesty02
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 7:47pm

I can’t blame the OP for being curious. Lol.  However, I think the OP should keep this info to herself. If it doesn't affect you, why do you care so much about what's going on in your "neighbor's" relationship? I understand its human nature to be curious, but trust me KEEP THIS INFOMATION TO YOUR SELF. Even if the wife finds out. I would never tell her what I saw. It could backfire. Trust me.

*Possible Negative Outcomes:

 

A.) If you tell the female, she probably won't believe you and/or think you’re trying to causes problems in her relationship. She might even accuse you of lusting after her man. Even though you’re just trying to give her a heads up.

 

B.) If you tell the guy what you saw in his email, he's going to ask, "Why the hell are you reading my emails ?"  Yea, it’s your computer, but it’s not your place to “check” someone else’s man. Let his wife handle that.

 

Trust me it’s not worth it. Ermm



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Proud West Indian ! Caribbean posse!


Posted By: bindy
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 7:54pm
Originally posted by CamiK CamiK wrote:

Talk to him, help him change his ways...im just throwing out ideas btw...
LOLLOLLOL


Posted By: Majesty02
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 7:56pm
Originally posted by maysay1 maysay1 wrote:

Thought you were talking about keek for a min there...

I would get the info to her anonymously (I probably wouldve just forwarded the emails) and keep being friends with her.
 
 
Hmmmmm excellent idea. Clap   Just make sure you create an anyonmous email account for this purpose.


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Proud West Indian ! Caribbean posse!


Posted By: miamiu1127
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 7:57pm
Next time you see him you should just say "Next time you need to make sure you log out of your email account when your using someone else's computer" That is all you need to say.

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I don't got to be fly, I'm fly in my pockets.


Posted By: James Avery
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 8:00pm
didn't read the thread past the OP but don't say nothing!

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God bless




Posted By: sache1991
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 8:24pm
Originally posted by ms_wonderland ms_wonderland wrote:

sache, don't bring that switch hitting shyt u into, into my thread. Sleepy

That was a legit question, snitch. Sleepy


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Posted By: ScorpioLuv
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 8:44pm
Idk, but that's what u get for being nosy, especially when it's not your man

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Sons of bitches,smh


Posted By: ms_wonderland
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 8:51pm
thanks for the insight and advice to those on page 5 minus sache.  there was never a question that i'd say something to him bc i wouldn't/couldn't...i just want her to know what i know.

i talked to my bf...he said he's not getting in this shyt. lol  so there ya go.  i'll just have to burn it from my memory.  if something happens again i will feel some kind of way bc i don't want anyone doing messy shyt on my computer. 


Posted By: HowardAlumAKA
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 9:06pm
Would you want to know if it were you? I'd just forward it all to her from his account


Posted By: EPITOME
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 9:10pm
looking witchya lookin ass

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I'm from The Wishanicca Woods boo-Dreamz

If you are or have ever been a member of BHM, you are inherently a hoodrat.B


Posted By: foxyroy19
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 9:18pm
would you want to someone to tell you if the roles were reversed?

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Taking names...keeping notes!


Posted By: JasonWllms55
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 9:20pm
Sleepy

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#BEDROOMBULLY


Posted By: eanaj5
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 9:40pm
dont listen to these "keep it to yourself" people. forward that ish from his account to hers. she needs to know wtf is going on, aids is real.

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[IMG]http://i50.tinypic.com/28mflg8.gif%5b/IMG]


Posted By: danni7
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 9:58pm
Post the nude pic on bhm so we can see


Posted By: JasonWllms55
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 10:00pm
SMH at Wonderbread for actually thinking her man would rat his friend out. i know ur smarter than that. men turn their heads to shyt like that. And women do too, cuz we had a thread about that. A woman is not going to rat her homegirl out for creeping. 

minding your own business will get u so far in life

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#BEDROOMBULLY


Posted By: indiecat
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 10:03pm
i'd tell her, tell her exactly how you told us. hes a phucking azzhole if he is doing that, even if hes not physically cheating and trying to boost his ego with those websites.

i'm not sure if your friend will want to believe you or not, you should have taken a picture of it or copied it so that you have evidence.


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"It's ignorant to try to invalidate someone else's experience because it hasn't happened to you yet."


Posted By: indiecat
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 10:04pm
Originally posted by HowardAlumAKA HowardAlumAKA wrote:

Would you want to know if it were you? I'd just forward it all to her from his account

this is actually a better idea.


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"It's ignorant to try to invalidate someone else's experience because it hasn't happened to you yet."


Posted By: ms_wonderland
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 10:16pm
Jason, your computer has an std.

Its too late for the fwding idea...I logged out bc I hadn't thought of doing anything like that at the time and I wasnt about to forward it to myself bc that's just weird.

Now I feel bad again.


Posted By: eanaj5
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 10:19pm
well, i personally wouldnt say anything to her unless i had tangible proof

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[IMG]http://i50.tinypic.com/28mflg8.gif%5b/IMG]


Posted By: ms_wonderland
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 10:27pm
If he does it again on my computer I will save it just because he needs to keep that shyt at home. I foresee him over here again within the next couple days. I am still 50/50 though. I hate being in the middle of shyt.


Posted By: tropical-punch
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 10:27pm
wonderland, your boyfriend already knows, trust me. Especially if this is a close friend. 


Posted By: EPITOME
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 10:30pm
Originally posted by ms_wonderland ms_wonderland wrote:

If he does it again on my computer I will save it just because he needs to keep that shyt at home. I foresee him over here again within the next couple days. I am still 50/50 though. I hate being in the middle of shyt.


ur technically not in the middle of anything....and you put yourself in there.


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I'm from The Wishanicca Woods boo-Dreamz

If you are or have ever been a member of BHM, you are inherently a hoodrat.B


Posted By: ms_wonderland
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 10:30pm
Originally posted by tropical-punch tropical-punch wrote:

wonderland, your boyfriend already knows, trust me. Especially if this is a close friend. 



He didn't know bc he seemed surprised and thought it was funny that he'd be scouring for azz on sites like that...we just talked about it again and he thinks he probably didn't take it offline.


Posted By: ms_wonderland
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 10:31pm
Originally posted by EPITOME EPITOME wrote:


Originally posted by ms_wonderland ms_wonderland wrote:

If he does it again on my computer I will save it just because he needs to keep that shyt at home. I foresee him over here again within the next couple days. I am still 50/50 though. I hate being in the middle of shyt.



ur technically not in the middle of anything....and you put yourself in there.

I know
With ppl saying I have a duty to tell its like I'm responsible with some type of girl code...I don't want to feel that way.


Posted By: JasonWllms55
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 10:31pm
all my posts are back in order.  back to the matter at hand. 

stay out of it. im telling u it will end badly for YOU.  and i wont elaborate any further. 


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#BEDROOMBULLY


Posted By: Katrenia
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 10:32pm
I'd be tempted to let her know but I'd act as if I hadn't found out anything.
If you must get involved; write him a little note telling him what you've found. Tell him you care, you're concerned and if he's putting it out there like that, please practice safe relations.
Yes, he'll start to bad mouth you to her and you'll lose both friends and the same would most likely happen if you tell her. She may already know what type of man she has.
As I said, I wouldn't get involved.


Posted By: ms_wonderland
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 10:33pm
I think it would end badly for me too.


Posted By: ms_wonderland
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 10:38pm
Welp, it's in Gods hands now. Lettuce pray.



Posted By: Flowing-Ice
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 10:39pm
honestly, i'd sing like a bird. 
i don't know how i would continue to build a relationship with her, knowing that i know something like that. whatever, thats just me though. keeping the secret is not worth my time. (especially, since i like her)


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And Jean Paul Gaultier and a Hermes bag and four inch tips made of ostrich ;Sharp enough to slit your wrists her lips spread gossip ;Won't say sorry when she offends


Posted By: Sang Froid
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 10:41pm
I wouldn't tell.

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Posted By: EPITOME
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 10:42pm
Originally posted by ms_wonderland ms_wonderland wrote:

Originally posted by EPITOME EPITOME wrote:


Originally posted by ms_wonderland ms_wonderland wrote:

If he does it again on my computer I will save it just because he needs to keep that shyt at home. I foresee him over here again within the next couple days. I am still 50/50 though. I hate being in the middle of shyt.



ur technically not in the middle of anything....and you put yourself in there.

I know
With ppl saying I have a duty to tell its like I'm responsible with some type of girl code...I don't want to feel that way.


not after 6 months you do not. you don't know anything about the dynamics of their relationship. now if after awhile she says..i think De'Wayne is cheating on me...you can be like guuuuurllll....check his email and sit back and watch it unfold


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I'm from The Wishanicca Woods boo-Dreamz

If you are or have ever been a member of BHM, you are inherently a hoodrat.B


Posted By: Flowing-Ice
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 10:43pm
lol... who's relationship dynamic includes cheating?
wth?


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And Jean Paul Gaultier and a Hermes bag and four inch tips made of ostrich ;Sharp enough to slit your wrists her lips spread gossip ;Won't say sorry when she offends


Posted By: Sang Froid
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 10:45pm
Originally posted by Flowing-Ice Flowing-Ice wrote:

lol... who's relationship dynamic includes cheating?
wth?

You'd be surprised. 


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Posted By: EPITOME
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 10:46pm
Originally posted by Flowing-Ice Flowing-Ice wrote:

lol... who's relationship dynamic includes cheating?
wth?

you've never heard of an open marriage/open relationship?

or...as long as he doesn't bring anything home. people put up w/different things.


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I'm from The Wishanicca Woods boo-Dreamz

If you are or have ever been a member of BHM, you are inherently a hoodrat.B


Posted By: Flowing-Ice
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 10:50pm
Originally posted by EPITOME EPITOME wrote:

Originally posted by Flowing-Ice Flowing-Ice wrote:

lol... who's relationship dynamic includes cheating?
wth?

you've never heard of an open marriage/open relationship?

or...as long as he doesn't bring anything home. people put up w/different things.

in such a relationship... that wouldn't be considered cheating. 
if it does turn out to be that way... then what would the problem with telling lol? 

the conversation would be smooth. 

thats not a real reason not to tell someone that their partner is cheating on them. 


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And Jean Paul Gaultier and a Hermes bag and four inch tips made of ostrich ;Sharp enough to slit your wrists her lips spread gossip ;Won't say sorry when she offends


Posted By: jonesable
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 10:51pm
I'd say something .


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Never send to know for whom the bells tolls; it tolls for thee
Donne

Havmercy Dez Bryant


Posted By: EPITOME
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 11:01pm
Originally posted by Flowing-Ice Flowing-Ice wrote:

Originally posted by EPITOME EPITOME wrote:

Originally posted by Flowing-Ice Flowing-Ice wrote:

lol... who's relationship dynamic includes cheating?
wth?

you've never heard of an open marriage/open relationship?

or...as long as he doesn't bring anything home. people put up w/different things.

in such a relationship... that wouldn't be considered cheating. 
if it does turn out to be that way... then what would the problem with telling lol? 

the conversation would be smooth. 

thats not a real reason not to tell someone that their partner is cheating on them. 


maybe she doesn't want ppl knowing her business?



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I'm from The Wishanicca Woods boo-Dreamz

If you are or have ever been a member of BHM, you are inherently a hoodrat.B


Posted By: ms_wonderland
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 11:05pm
Nah, id be 99.99% that it's not an open relationship. I think he's just not getting it like he was before the baby.


Posted By: Organic
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 11:12pm
I'd tell the girlfriend,

"Hey, you should really tell your boyfriend to be sure to log out of his email account, especially if he has questionable content Stern Smile".

She can take that as she may. If I were building a relationship with someone, I'd find a circuitous way to mention it without being too ambiguous. I'd also want someone to tell me. I'd really, really want someone to tell me. I'd be pissed if you smile in my face and act like nothing is wrong when you have knowledge of wrongdoings that I may not be privy to.

..I'd just be like,

"...your boyfriend left his e-mail account open on my computer. You may want to look through it with him Stern SmileStern SmileStern SmileStern SmileStern SmileStern SmileStern Smile"

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Cut from full hip to full waist
Maxi Glide with coconut oil
Pin curls
VOILA!


Posted By: Organic
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 11:14pm
Originally posted by ms_wonderland ms_wonderland wrote:

Nah, id be 99.99% that it's not an open relationship. I think he's just not getting it like he was before the baby.


...and if he's so damn horny and inconsiderate that he can't keep it in his pants after his girlfriend just had HIS baby, I'd sing like a frikkin canary. The hell?

Hearing this always grates my nerves. I don't think much else gets me as cross.


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Cut from full hip to full waist
Maxi Glide with coconut oil
Pin curls
VOILA!


Posted By: EPITOME
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 11:15pm
Originally posted by ms_wonderland ms_wonderland wrote:

Nah, id be 99.99% that it's not an open relationship. I think he's just not getting it like he was before the baby.



well that's gross and selfish


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I'm from The Wishanicca Woods boo-Dreamz

If you are or have ever been a member of BHM, you are inherently a hoodrat.B


Posted By: Organic
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 11:17pm
HugOP, I know you are in a precarious situation, especially with you being fond of them both. Good luck.


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Cut from full hip to full waist
Maxi Glide with coconut oil
Pin curls
VOILA!


Posted By: Finesseful
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 11:29pm
I'd ask her to hang out on the solo tip & bring some alcohol. You two would be alone to talk woman to woman. Ask her how are things after the baby, with ol boy etc. For example just be like "I noticed Johnny been hanging around a lot lately, is everything okay?" Or "I know having a baby can put a strain on certain things in life. If you need to talk just let me know."

You gonna have her guards down enough to see where she is at mentally & if she even has an idea about him cheating. Sometimes you have to enter a situation like this through the back alley.

Build her trust so you can help her discover the truth herself. I wouldn't say sh*t. Just lead her to the water.

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Make love, not war.


Posted By: keepgrowing
Date Posted: Feb 07 2013 at 11:35pm
i would tell. he was the idiot that left his email signed in on your computer. the only thing is that u might lose a friend. don't expect for her to be all kumbayaya sista hood. or maybe you shouldn't cause the messenger always gets shot in situations like these. but then again, if you knew and don't tell, shell prolly get mad.  

then again, maybe u should cause its better than her finding out by getting burned cause I doubt that they are using condoms

ya i unno. u can't win either way..but it is about her life not urs.

but honestly, ive seen situations like these and each time the girl/guy stayed until she/he was ready to leave. part of her probably already knows.

i unno girl. just do what you feel is best. gl lol.


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You can't just walk in with a huge banana and expect everything to be peaches.

If you no know me brotha, I no like wahala.


Posted By: BBpants
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 12:40am
Listening to people on BHM will get you choked LOL

Honestly I wouldn't say anything. It's not my place.


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yo


Posted By: rell85
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 12:47am
just forget it's thier problems if he didn't try anything with you nothing to tell.


Posted By: sistagal
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 1:04am
Originally posted by ms_wonderland ms_wonderland wrote:


Originally posted by CamiK CamiK wrote:

Forward the emails to her...start some drama


lol so everyone can be mad at me?  


You should have forwarded from his email. No one would ever prove you did it. If he figures out it was probably because his email was still logged in at your house let your man take the blame lol


Posted By: ms_wonderland
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 1:32am
Originally posted by Organic Organic wrote:

HugOP, I know you are in a precarious situation, especially with you being fond of them both. Good luck.

Hug i know it's my fault but thank you. lol

everyone makes good points in here...bhm is the best. Thumbs Up


Posted By: khivey
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 6:17am
She knows. No need to tell her. She just had a baby..she doesn't need the stress. She still has to deal with this man, so don't make it any harder for her by letting her know you know as well.




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Hair Type:3c/4a
Hair Length:SBL
“The approval of others often forms an essential part of our capacity to think we are right.”


Posted By: BeatriceBean
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 6:27am
Do you recall the names of the hookup websites? Do you remember his screenname? If you do, you don't have to say "Your man is cheating and I have proof." Send her an e-mail with a link to his profile, just as a "thought you should see this" and she'll connect the dots for herself. Most likely she'll ask him to own the account and see all the activity.

If you're not feeling so brave, make up a fake e-mail (that you still think she'd open mail from) and there you go. Don't respond to any responses about who you are, how you know them, etc. If you take that route, delete the account as soon as you know she's received it.

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Life is good!


Posted By: Harmonii
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 7:36am
Originally posted by Organic Organic wrote:

I'd tell the girlfriend,

"Hey, you should really tell your boyfriend to be sure to log out of his email account, especially if he has questionable content Stern Smile".

She can take that as she may. If I were building a relationship with someone, I'd find a circuitous way to mention it without being too ambiguous. I'd also want someone to tell me. I'd really, really want someone to tell me. I'd be pissed if you smile in my face and act like nothing is wrong when you have knowledge of wrongdoings that I may not be privy to.

..I'd just be like,

"...your boyfriend left his e-mail account open on my computer. You may want to look through it with him Stern SmileStern SmileStern SmileStern SmileStern SmileStern SmileStern Smile"



I like this


Posted By: BrownQtee
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 10:44am
Originally posted by BeatriceBean BeatriceBean wrote:

Do you recall the names of the hookup websites? Do you remember his screenname? If you do, you don't have to say "Your man is cheating and I have proof." Send her an e-mail with a link to his profile, just as a "thought you should see this" and she'll connect the dots for herself. Most likely she'll ask him to own the account and see all the activity.

If you're not feeling so brave, make up a fake e-mail (that you still think she'd open mail from) and there you go. Don't respond to any responses about who you are, how you know them, etc. If you take that route, delete the account as soon as you know she's received it.
 
 
Yep. I agree with this. I would want someone to let me know. Couldn't sleep at night knowing this girl is raw dogging a cheater.


Posted By: msjaim2
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 10:55am
ALL OF THIS.  Im snitching.mfkas stay sneaking, not giving ppl the option to take the risk by continuing to deal with him. Just gross selfishness. 



Originally posted by Organic Organic wrote:

Originally posted by ms_wonderland ms_wonderland wrote:

Nah, id be 99.99% that it's not an open relationship. I think he's just not getting it like he was before the baby.


...and if he's so damn horny and inconsiderate that he can't keep it in his pants after his girlfriend just had HIS baby, I'd sing like a frikkin canary. The hell?

Hearing this always grates my nerves. I don't think much else gets me as cross.



Posted By: Sang Froid
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 10:56am
Never do anything BHM tells you to do.

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Posted By: JasmineE02
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 11:02am
I'd just tell her to check out his email.  I'd say I saw something on accident and it may be nothing, but I'd feel bad not mentioning it just in case.  That way everything is up to her.  If she wants to snoop, peachy...if not, then I tried.  I'd also be okay losing a friend.  Guilt is not something I handle well and I'd feel extremely guilty.    


Posted By: coconess
Date Posted: Feb 08 2013 at 11:19am
i like BB's idea of sending an email to her (new email addy) with a link to the site and his username.. 

and you could add in a little note about how he has been making arrangements to meet up with a few different women 

there is still a chance of him remembering that he didnt sign out of your comp and him suspecting you though.. 



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