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How would you handle this?

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Printed Date: Dec 13 2018 at 6:57pm


Topic: How would you handle this?
Posted By: bebe88
Subject: How would you handle this?
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 4:42pm
Long story modified.

My hubby and I have a 1 year old son.

We went back home to Miami for the 1st and left bby there so he can spend time with his grandparents.

Bby is supposed to stay until march.

Prob is my mom has him ALL THE TIME. My mom just went back to school and has a tight schedule. My mom has some help w the bby but she feels some kind of way bc my mom n law is barely available to watch bby. On average she keeps bby twice a week for a few hours.

Her excuse is she has things to do and can't take bby w her.

But my mom has things to do as well but she takes bby w her anyway ( her doc appointments, grocery shopping, anywhere she needs to go except school)

Also when my mom n law actually watches him, she never offers to pick him up from my mom. My mom ALWAYS has to drop him off and pick him up...no matter the time.

We left bby there to spend a couple months with both sides of his family but only my side is actually stepping up.

My mom doesn't want me to tell hubby. My mom does not want to speak up and cause drama...but I know it pisses her off. I'm to the point now that I'm just ready to go down and pick him up...we wanted to wait until we moved to a new place first though...

Should I tell hubby? Stay quiet and keep listening to my mom vent? Or just go pick up bby....even though my mom isn't ready for him to leave yet? Or should me n hubby talk to his mom?

Hubby's mom was not in his life growing up btw....

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http://www.youtube.com/user/BrittaneyRachel



Replies:
Posted By: Princess_S
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 4:45pm

Go pick up YOUR child cause its inconveniencing YOUR mom.



Posted By: bebe88
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 4:51pm
Yes, I literally just spoke to my mom and told her we will be there for him next weekend.

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http://www.youtube.com/user/BrittaneyRachel


Posted By: Tbaby
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 4:53pm
IA w/ Princess S.  Why your mom assumed your MIL was going to help more is a fail on her part (your mom's).  Get your child and that way there's no more drama.  Don't talk to hubby about it--that might just worsen your relationship with your MIL.    And you can't "force" your MIL to take your kid if she doesn't want to...




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Everyone has a role in life. We all can't be CEO's somebody gotta take the orders at Mickey D's & the KFC's -Jewelsync


Posted By: EPITOME
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 4:54pm
what i am gonna say sounds rough: your mom is trying to improve herself and she has already raised her child[ren].  your child is not her job and it should not be an excessive burden for her in the least.  it sounds like you did not just drop the child off to "just spend time w/grandparents." 3 months is a loooong time and I truly feel like you both are avoiding your duties as parents by burdening your mother like that and are being selfish.

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I'm from The Wishanicca Woods boo-Dreamz

If you are or have ever been a member of BHM, you are inherently a hoodrat.B


Posted By: bunzaveli
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 4:58pm
^ oooooooooooooooo


Posted By: bebe88
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 5:00pm
Originally posted by EPITOME EPITOME wrote:


what i am gonna say sounds rough: your mom is trying to improve herself and she has already raised her child[ren].  your child is not her job and it should not be an excessive burden for her in the least.  it sounds like you did not just drop the child off to "just spend time w/grandparents." 3 months is a loooong time and I truly feel like you both are avoiding your duties as parents by burdening your mother like that and are being selfish.
I can see why you feel this way but you don't know us our our entire situation. He went down there in part so we could work on things that would benefit all of us...especially him.

Anywho, that's your opinion...no hard feelings at all.

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http://www.youtube.com/user/BrittaneyRachel


Posted By: bubblyboo
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 5:03pm
Man that would kind of hurt my feelings. I don't know a grandparent who doesn't luuuub the granbabies. I think you should go and get your son and don't bother with the mil spending time with your bby boy. Let whoever wants to be involved be involved on their own accord. 

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Cry me a river d*@kface you just got yourself another one!


Posted By: EPITOME
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 5:05pm
Ok..then say your mom is watching the kid bc yall are trying to improve yourselves...nothing wrong with that and imo sounds better than grandparent time. bc if it's bc yall are working on something then it seems like more of a necessity and your mothers sacrifice makes more sense, rather than..we were tryna be on a kid free vacay for 3 months kwim?

anyway it seems like your mom is being forced to act as a single mom in this situation which isn't fair.


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I'm from The Wishanicca Woods boo-Dreamz

If you are or have ever been a member of BHM, you are inherently a hoodrat.B


Posted By: madame pink
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 5:05pm
Go get YOUR baby and all this wont be an issue. It is really no point to talk with the MIL as this is your child. Yes you prob had an agreement however that is your child. The child can spend time with the grandparents for longer durations when he is much older. Until then there is family vacations.


Posted By: niecy
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 5:05pm
Originally posted by Princess_S Princess_S wrote:

Go pick up YOUR child cause its inconveniencing YOUR mom.


This right chea. That's your child anyway. No need to stress your mom out over a child that technically isn't her responsibility to take care of to begin with..


Posted By: freedom76
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 5:06pm
Did your MIL know that she was going to take half of the responsibility of the baby prior to you leaving him there? Did your hubby think this as well? I am not understanding why you wouldn't talk to him about it, or even talk to your MIL about it. A NICE phone may be in order.

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I find women that encourage double standards on other women disgusting./femmefatale85


Posted By: bebe88
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 5:07pm
Originally posted by bubblyboo bubblyboo wrote:

Man that would kind of hurt my feelings. I don't know a grandparent who doesn't luuuub the granbabies. I think you should go and get your son and don't bother with the mil spending time with your bby boy. Let whoever wants to be involved be involved on their own accord. 

we feel the same way. I told my mom, until we get there next weekend, do not call her to watch him unless its absolutely necessary. If mil wants to see bby, she needs to call my mom....and offer to go to my moms house. If not, her loss, we will pass by to see her on our way back home.

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http://www.youtube.com/user/BrittaneyRachel


Posted By: bebe88
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 5:09pm
Yes she knew. No one wants to be the bad guy that calls her out on it. I'm not talking to him about it bc my mom asked me not to mention it.
Originally posted by freedom76 freedom76 wrote:

Did your MIL know that she was going to take half of the responsibility of the baby prior to you leaving him there? Did your hubby think this as well? I am not understanding why you wouldn't talk to him about it, or even talk to your MIL about it. A NICE phone may be in order.


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http://www.youtube.com/user/BrittaneyRachel


Posted By: freedom76
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 5:11pm
Originally posted by bebe88 bebe88 wrote:

Yes she knew. No one wants to be the bad guy that calls her out on it. I'm not talking to him about it bc my mom asked me not to mention it.
Originally posted by freedom76 freedom76 wrote:

Did your MIL know that she was going to take half of the responsibility of the baby prior to you leaving him there? Did your hubby think this as well? I am not understanding why you wouldn't talk to him about it, or even talk to your MIL about it. A NICE phone may be in order.


I am not saying to call her out. I meant NICE for realLOL. Does your husband talk to his mother regularly? All relationships are different, but when it comes to my children, me and hubby talk and vent about everything. I know you are upset, but maybe your husband can offer some real solutions.


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I find women that encourage double standards on other women disgusting./femmefatale85


Posted By: bubblyboo
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 5:12pm
Originally posted by bebe88 bebe88 wrote:

Originally posted by bubblyboo bubblyboo wrote:

Man that would kind of hurt my feelings. I don't know a grandparent who doesn't luuuub the granbabies. I think you should go and get your son and don't bother with the mil spending time with your bby boy. Let whoever wants to be involved be involved on their own accord. 

we feel the same way. I told my mom, until we get there next weekend, do not call her to watch him unless its absolutely necessary. If mil wants to see bby, she needs to call my mom....and offer to go to my moms house. If not, her loss, we will pass by to see her on our way back home.


I understand where you are coming from. You all made an arrangement with your mom and mil while you and hubby take care of a few things, move etc etc which is extremely difficult with a 1 year old and to boot, bby boy would get to spend some time with his grandparents. Everyone was fine with it but now that things are in motion its a train wreck with the bulk of the responsibility on your mom when originally it wasn't supposed to be that way. If everyone would have stuck to the plan then it wouldn't seem soo.... weird and would be like a little vaca for bby with both grandmas. Now it seems like you're just dumping him and its all your fault with you and your son burdening everyone. I get how you feel. My feelings would be really hurt. Most grandparents would be jumping for joy for something like this.


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Cry me a river d*@kface you just got yourself another one!


Posted By: sugabanana
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 5:12pm
Go and get your baby. Grandma want to educate herself. MIL wants to live life. Raise your baby. 3 months is too long of a visit. A visit is the weekend or the summer if grandma was a teacher on summer break. Tell your husband only after the baby is back with you. This way there's no miscommunication later. Baby at 1 years old is a lot of work. Jmo

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Russell hired me to police those who STAR these non-sensical threads!!!He said I should feel free to point them out!!


Posted By: Tbaby
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 5:15pm
Originally posted by freedom76 freedom76 wrote:

Originally posted by bebe88 bebe88 wrote:

Yes she knew. No one wants to be the bad guy that calls her out on it. I'm not talking to him about it bc my mom asked me not to mention it.
Originally posted by freedom76 freedom76 wrote:

Did your MIL know that she was going to take half of the responsibility of the baby prior to you leaving him there? Did your hubby think this as well? I am not understanding why you wouldn't talk to him about it, or even talk to your MIL about it. A NICE phone may be in order.


I am not saying to call her out. I meant NICE for realLOL. Does your husband talk to his mother regularly? All relationships are different, but when it comes to my children, me and hubby talk and vent about everything. I know you are upset, but maybe your husband can offer some real solutions.


that sounds like good advice.  I retract my comment bebe that you shouldn't talk to hubby lol.  Its good that he should know whats going on with your family and his.  That way if your MIL says something to him, he's already heard about the lack of steppin up on her part.


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Everyone has a role in life. We all can't be CEO's somebody gotta take the orders at Mickey D's & the KFC's -Jewelsync


Posted By: EPITOME
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 5:17pm
oh yes and absolutely speak to your husband
that shouldn't even be up for discussion imo tbh fwiw all of that


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I'm from The Wishanicca Woods boo-Dreamz

If you are or have ever been a member of BHM, you are inherently a hoodrat.B


Posted By: freedom76
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 5:18pm
How can you go and get your baby if your husband doesn't know the real reason? DO NOT LIE TO YOUR HUSBAND!!!!!


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I find women that encourage double standards on other women disgusting./femmefatale85


Posted By: Tbaby
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 5:19pm
what does fwiw mean, Pity?

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Everyone has a role in life. We all can't be CEO's somebody gotta take the orders at Mickey D's & the KFC's -Jewelsync


Posted By: WadadliQueen
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 5:19pm
I agree that you should go and get your son but I see you want to respect your mother's wishes and not tell your husband about his mother. However, won't your husband want to know why you are going to get the baby early since it was agreed that he would be there until March? What would you tell him, I think not talking to your husband first about it may be a bad move.


Posted By: EPITOME
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 5:21pm
Originally posted by Tbaby Tbaby wrote:

what does fwiw mean, Pity?

for what it's worth


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I'm from The Wishanicca Woods boo-Dreamz

If you are or have ever been a member of BHM, you are inherently a hoodrat.B


Posted By: dreamz
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 5:22pm
your mil meant she'd spend some time with the baby. That meant just what it sounded like. She wants to do it on her schedule and when it is onvenient to her.

Nothing to be mad at imo, if people arent taking care of your baby like you'd prefer, if your mother is overwhelmed, go get her - that's YOUR child.

You could mention it to your husband, hopefully he'll let you vent, and ou all will go get your child. The reality is probably that she meant it when she said she'd help out, but when She got to thinking about bottles, diapers, crying and all of that, she changed her mind.

That's probably why she didn't have any more kids of her own.

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specs: handmade 8" kinky curly upart wig. wefts purchased from http://www.kinkycurlyyaki.com


Posted By: Tbaby
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 5:24pm
Yep--your marriage trumps mom's wishes here.  He needs to know what's going on. 

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Everyone has a role in life. We all can't be CEO's somebody gotta take the orders at Mickey D's & the KFC's -Jewelsync


Posted By: Princess_S
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 5:25pm
Originally posted by freedom76 freedom76 wrote:

How can you go and get your baby if your husband doesn't know the real reason? DO NOT LIE TO YOUR HUSBAND!!!!!
If her mom has the baby primarily then she can just say its too much for her mom She (BEBE) thinks they should go get him. She isnt lying. But she doesnt have to bring it up out the gate just to keep the peace.
 
At the end of the day its your kid you cant expect mom to keep him for 3 months to better your lives. You guys are gonna just have to make bigger sacrifices and find a way to make it work with him there. 3 months is a bit long. 2 weeks is spending time . 3 months she might as well claim him on her taxes next yr. LOL


Posted By: freedom76
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 5:28pm
Originally posted by Princess_S Princess_S wrote:

Originally posted by freedom76 freedom76 wrote:

How can you go and get your baby if your husband doesn't know the real reason? DO NOT LIE TO YOUR HUSBAND!!!!!
If her mom has the baby primarily then she can just say its too much for her mom She (BEBE) thinks they should go get him. She isnt lying. But she doesnt have to bring it up out the gate just to keep the peace.
 
At the end of the day its your kid you cant expect mom to keep him for 3 months to better your lives. You guys are gonna just have to make bigger sacrifices and find a way to make it work with him there. 3 months is a bit long. 2 weeks is spending time . 3 months she might as well claim him on her taxes next yr. LOL


True at the bold. That is also saying "Honey your mother isn't helping!" That is the same thing. Why beat around the bush? Say "baby, moms can't do this by herself. Your mother really isn't helping  much. It is OK, but I think we should go and get him." Easy peasy. Unless her husband is an idiot, he will know her mother said something to her.
I would also talk to the MIL. A quick phone call, but I have a good relationship with mine. So it is probably different.


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I find women that encourage double standards on other women disgusting./femmefatale85


Posted By: dreamz
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 5:34pm
Tell your husband, not in a your mama aint shyt way, but more like

"we'd better go get the baby since my mom is back in school and your mom is so busy too. I think the baby was a little bit much for them. I thought your mom would help out more, but i know babies are a lot of work."

Btw, i don't know who lied to you younger people to make u think that your parents will be falling over themselves to raise your children. In an emergency, sure. Just because you're moving and 'working on summin' maybe, but i doubt it.

Weekends, summer breaks for older kids fine, 3 MONTHS with a one year old?????? Nope.

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specs: handmade 8" kinky curly upart wig. wefts purchased from http://www.kinkycurlyyaki.com


Posted By: Princess_S
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 5:42pm
Originally posted by freedom76 freedom76 wrote:

Originally posted by Princess_S Princess_S wrote:

Originally posted by freedom76 freedom76 wrote:

How can you go and get your baby if your husband doesn't know the real reason? DO NOT LIE TO YOUR HUSBAND!!!!!
If her mom has the baby primarily then she can just say its too much for her mom She (BEBE) thinks they should go get him. She isnt lying. But she doesnt have to bring it up out the gate just to keep the peace.
 
At the end of the day its your kid you cant expect mom to keep him for 3 months to better your lives. You guys are gonna just have to make bigger sacrifices and find a way to make it work with him there. 3 months is a bit long. 2 weeks is spending time . 3 months she might as well claim him on her taxes next yr. LOL


True at the bold. That is also saying "Honey your mother isn't helping!" That is the same thing. Why beat around the bush? Say "baby, moms can't do this by herself. Your mother really isn't helping  much. It is OK, but I think we should go and get him." Easy peasy. Unless her husband is an idiot, he will know her mother said something to her.
I would also talk to the MIL. A quick phone call, but I have a good relationship with mine. So it is probably different.
 
I really think this can be left out until her husband asks So what about my mom?  And then if he brings it up she can go into detail. Sometimes (based on people's relationships) saying less is more. This isnt an issue within just her , hubby and her mom. its kinda like she is getting third party info. Her mom's idea of helping out alot and MIL idea may be too different things and MIL sees nothing wrong with her way. I say dont create extra excitement.
At least we all agree she needs to go get her munchkin and bring him home. and since she already decided on doing that why create an extra excitement.


Posted By: Gkisses
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 5:55pm
Its wasn't moms responsibility in the first place so u cant really be mad at her imo she tried and it ran its course. No need to be salty just go get ur child and raise it. If the husband needed a reason it simply be it became to much and its best the child came home........ 


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Posted By: katakana89
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 5:57pm
I don't think I could ever inconvenience my parents this way.
(Not married, no children. Just observing. Dunno your whole situation...)


Posted By: bebe88
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 6:10pm
Thx all. My husband knows my mom doesn't have a lot of help right now....but he doesn't know that his mom isn't doing much. He probably wouldn't be surprised if I told him.

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http://www.youtube.com/user/BrittaneyRachel


Posted By: creole booty
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 6:32pm
Originally posted by katakana89 katakana89 wrote:

I don't think I could ever inconvenience my parents this way.
(Not married, no children. Just observing. Dunno your whole situation...)


A lot of grandparents beg to keep the grand babies for as long as possible. Especially when they live more than 2 hours away.

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i lost all my baby weight: )


Posted By: Flowing-Ice
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 6:36pm
are you and your husband completing a drug deal or something?
why can't you guys go one at a time, or take the baby with you?

his mom is probably not that interested in the child. 


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And Jean Paul Gaultier and a Hermes bag and four inch tips made of ostrich ;Sharp enough to slit your wrists her lips spread gossip ;Won't say sorry when she offends


Posted By: Flowing-Ice
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 6:37pm
Originally posted by creole booty creole booty wrote:

Originally posted by katakana89 katakana89 wrote:

I don't think I could ever inconvenience my parents this way.
(Not married, no children. Just observing. Dunno your whole situation...)


A lot of grandparents beg to keep the grand babies for as long as possible. Especially when they live more than 2 hours away.

yep. most grandparents love their kiddies. 


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And Jean Paul Gaultier and a Hermes bag and four inch tips made of ostrich ;Sharp enough to slit your wrists her lips spread gossip ;Won't say sorry when she offends


Posted By: EPITOME
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 7:11pm
maybe she's Blanche Devereux and tryna keep her sexy lol

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I'm from The Wishanicca Woods boo-Dreamz

If you are or have ever been a member of BHM, you are inherently a hoodrat.B


Posted By: carolina cutie
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 7:20pm
I like the advice given in this thread. Good luck OP!



OT: Creole, my parents already mention how they are looking forward to spoiling their grandkids. Me too because they gone get that work.Stern Smile

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<--Classy & Educated O.

"You're telling us your beefing with your bf's mother over $1 ice cream like it was blood diamonds." RickyR



Posted By: dreamz
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 7:33pm
Wanting to spoil your grandkids is not the same as wanting to raise them for 3 months at a time.

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specs: handmade 8" kinky curly upart wig. wefts purchased from http://www.kinkycurlyyaki.com


Posted By: creole booty
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 7:37pm
Originally posted by carolina cutie carolina cutie wrote:

I like the advice given in this thread. Good luck OP!



OT: Creole, my parents already mention how they are looking forward to spoiling their grandkids. Me too because they gone get that work.Stern Smile



Yeah! My dad moved to where I am to help full time. My mom never refuses keeping her for as long as possible (which at longest is four days), his mom calls almost everyday to get her, not to mention aunts, cousins and other family! The only people I allow watch her are grandparents, my single successful aunt, and his sister. Yet everyone still begs! It's not unusual for people to readjust their lives to keep someone else's baby. Babies bring a kind of joy that can't b duplicated. There is no relationship like that and it's only available for a short amount of time. I'm sure the op's mom was overjoyed to be asked to keep the baby for 3 months. She probably offered.

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i lost all my baby weight: )


Posted By: BBpants
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 7:43pm
3 months is a long ass time...Plus your mom is going to school too? smh I know your mom is stressed as hell.




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yo


Posted By: carolina cutie
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 7:54pm
Creole, I love how your family is so eager to help out with your little girl! Heart

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<--Classy & Educated O.

"You're telling us your beefing with your bf's mother over $1 ice cream like it was blood diamonds." RickyR



Posted By: creole booty
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 7:59pm
Originally posted by carolina cutie carolina cutie wrote:

Creole, I love how your family is so eager to help out with your little girl! Heart



Me too lol. They told me if I have more that they might not b as eager in so many words lol.

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i lost all my baby weight: )


Posted By: EPITOME
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 8:00pm
i think it works best when the grandparents might be retired and wanna have fun w/a baby. but if they're working or trying to go to school...it is tough to go to school and be a parent...anyone can attest to that

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I'm from The Wishanicca Woods boo-Dreamz

If you are or have ever been a member of BHM, you are inherently a hoodrat.B


Posted By: Gkisses
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 8:19pm
Originally posted by BBpants BBpants wrote:

3 months is a long ass time...Plus your mom is going to school too? smh I know your mom is stressed as hell.




Yup. Pretty much made her a single mom with a toddler ...when the kid has two parents else where. I dont get the set up but okay..... I agree with Epitome if the grandparents were retired and living it up I would understand but the fact that the child being there is making it harder for her is more reason for you to come and get your child.  I dont get being mad at the other grandma either..she doesnt have to be on duty for 3 months either....What have yall been doing while the babies been with the grandfolks?.... do yall go and see him or get him for weekends?....


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Posted By: foxyroy19
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 9:29pm
Never keep secrets from your husband.  Let him handle his family but don't keep secrets. 

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Taking names...keeping notes!


Posted By: sexyandfamous
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 10:04pm
Originally posted by bubblyboo bubblyboo wrote:

Man that would kind of hurt my feelings. I don't know a grandparent who doesn't luuuub the granbabies. I think you should go and get your son and don't bother with the mil spending time with your bby boy. Let whoever wants to be involved be involved on their own accord. 


Don't do that. MIL will leash her fury on you. You don't want to be against your husband's mommy, regardless of her being in his life or not, it is his mom.

What your mother needs to do or you is, next time you speak to you MIL to arrange a day/time for her to be with the baby, you or your mom just need to say "So what time are you coming to pick him up/drop him off?"




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hip measured is from fullest part on butt:
start: 32C-24-35

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Posted By: ImThatDiva
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 10:43pm
How old are you two? This situation sounds like that of teen parents imo and no offense. You sound like you and your husband had a child when you weren't ready to do so. I mean, you both decided to bring the baby into the world. In reality you are inconveniencing your parents(his and yours) while you two are handling your business. Part of being a parent is making things work in conjunction with raising your child.

I don't blame you MIL and can't really figure out what she's done wrong here. That's her GRANDson, not her son. She has her own life. As does your mother who you've now burdened with the task of raising your 1 year old baby for 3 months. Did she specifically say that she'd split the time with your mother? 

I think you two should go and get YOUR child and figure things out.
I don't know, I'm not a mother. I just couldn't picture being away from my child-baby for a whole 3 months. You're making the decision to better your lives and that's great. However, your a parent and your child is your responsibility no matter how hard things are. You have to figure out how to make it work when it does get hard because you really can't go drop off your child or future children every time you guys need to figure things out.
Anyhow, I wish you guys the best of luck.




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Mrs.ImThatModdlessDiva
TWERKIN' MY WAY DOWNTOWN
CARS DRIVE PAST
DRIVERS CRASH AND I'M LOWDOWN
-Midna


Posted By: ImThatDiva
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 10:47pm
Originally posted by BBpants BBpants wrote:

3 months is a long ass time...Plus your mom is going to school too? smh I know your mom is stressed as hell.


That + studying and doing homework and keeping a household and if she's lucky, seeing her friends and other family and then raising a baby albeit it's only for two more months but still...


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Mrs.ImThatModdlessDiva
TWERKIN' MY WAY DOWNTOWN
CARS DRIVE PAST
DRIVERS CRASH AND I'M LOWDOWN
-Midna


Posted By: jonesable
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 10:49pm
I think the OP and her husband are in the military so that maybe why the baby is with the grandma so long

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Never send to know for whom the bells tolls; it tolls for thee
Donne

Havmercy Dez Bryant


Posted By: ImThatDiva
Date Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 11:10pm
Originally posted by jonesable jonesable wrote:

I think the OP and her husband are in the military so that maybe why the baby is with the grandma so long
Ahhh see now that's entirely something different.
The military doesn't allow someone to be on permanent leave or something like that if they have a child? Like do they have special provision for parents?


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Mrs.ImThatModdlessDiva
TWERKIN' MY WAY DOWNTOWN
CARS DRIVE PAST
DRIVERS CRASH AND I'M LOWDOWN
-Midna


Posted By: bebe88
Date Posted: Feb 01 2013 at 6:22am
Originally posted by jonesable jonesable wrote:

I think the OP and her husband are in the military so that maybe why the baby is with the grandma so long
this

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http://www.youtube.com/user/BrittaneyRachel


Posted By: bebe88
Date Posted: Feb 01 2013 at 6:26am
Yea it is haaaaard having a child with both parents are in the military...and since bby is 10 driving hours we have to request leave and all that.

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http://www.youtube.com/user/BrittaneyRachel


Posted By: bebe88
Date Posted: Feb 01 2013 at 6:29am
I had to send him with my mom last year cuz bby kept getting sick. Got pneumonia twice and had theflu once. Both our supervision said we were taking too much time off...since he can't go to daycare while sick. Waaaay too much drama w these ppl.

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http://www.youtube.com/user/BrittaneyRachel


Posted By: Prazol60
Date Posted: Feb 01 2013 at 6:52am
Is there any possible way you and your husband can move closer to your mother so the three of you can help care for your child? If you MIL doesn't have time or doesn't want to help out then you have to just deal with it. She is done raising her children. It is great as a parent when you get help and have tons of support but nobody owes you the help.

As a couple the two of you should be able to find a situation to your problem. If you can't both move then maybe one can go ahead while the other stays behind. It is not ideal but it is a temp fix. You have to tell your husband, he is your partner. I would not put in as if his mother should be helping but that your mother is stressed out right now.

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Posted By: afrokock
Date Posted: Feb 01 2013 at 6:59am
Originally posted by Princess_S Princess_S wrote:

Go pick up YOUR child cause its inconveniencing YOUR mom.

pretty much

just noted military etc..

tough one

can you not extended leave of absence or something?

good luck ..

i do think its unfair to expect someone to help in with your child at the end of the day.

your mom is/was being kind enough, but you really shouldnt be expecting yoru MIL to step in.

and since you know she is reluctant already, is this the person you want to watch your child?

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I just can't stand the negro british midget. He brings out the worst in me.....

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I sometimes think AfroK is gay and either doesn't know it or won't admit to it..


Posted By: EPITOME
Date Posted: Feb 01 2013 at 8:48am
i thought you had 2 kids bebe?

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I'm from The Wishanicca Woods boo-Dreamz

If you are or have ever been a member of BHM, you are inherently a hoodrat.B


Posted By: ThoughtCouture
Date Posted: Feb 01 2013 at 8:54am
Originally posted by bebe88 bebe88 wrote:

my side is actually stepping up.
 
i was with you till i got to this part.  originally i thought this was something maybe the grandparents requested and that his mom was pulling a reverse reverse.  but that part made me think you asked them and not the other way around...
 
bottom line, i'd have to go get my baby...


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you say i need some time to meditate...naaaaah b*tch i'm fly! i need time to levitate... ~yeezy


dacoldesteva


Posted By: ThoughtCouture
Date Posted: Feb 01 2013 at 9:02am

hmmm....just read this page and i see that both parents are in the military.

i am really not a fan of this arrangement...that is...2 parents in the military, especially with mos's that require regular tdy...having small children without a SOLID support structure...


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you say i need some time to meditate...naaaaah b*tch i'm fly! i need time to levitate... ~yeezy


dacoldesteva


Posted By: BrownQtee
Date Posted: Feb 01 2013 at 9:02am
All kinds of shade up in this thread. Those who live in glass houses.. Sleepy


Posted By: newin2009
Date Posted: Feb 01 2013 at 11:40am
Tough situation. Is there a base/post close to your family? Can you not find a stay at home mom you could pay to keep your child?


Posted By: bebe88
Date Posted: Feb 01 2013 at 1:39pm
My job isn't available at the base in Miami. I'm not re enlisting though so I will be out soon enough...

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http://www.youtube.com/user/BrittaneyRachel



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