| Derri wrote:|
What benefits do I expect to reap? Well the true and living God does everything right. So if I do as many things right as I can, then the expectation of our relationship is endless. In my lifetime My biggest desire for our relationship is for me to kill my ego.
Ego created sin in the first place, and the only way to get rid of it and to get back to where we were with our father would be to overcome our ego. In the Garden of Gethsemane Jesus overcame the ego of man for us, to cancel out our defeat with our ego in the Garden of Eden.
Ego is a bigger deal than most christian leaders teach. Heck, they rarely ever teach about it, yet it is the cause of all human issues.
-There has been several times in my life where I felt like God packed up and moved and didn't send me his new address.
I felt lower than the pit. I felt abandoned and desolate. Near death. And let's not talk about when I grow closer to God and hear from him a thousand times a day, and then all of a sudden it seems like he drops his arm that fastened me, and all of my life tumbled to the ground. I spoke to him and he was mute. Months on end I can't hear from God despite fasting and meditation. I hear very well, so when I don't hear from God I got batsh*t crazy! It really puts his necessity in my life in perspective. Now when that happens I am reminded of how often King David felt abandoned by God: "Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? … If I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast. If I say, 'Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me,' even the darkness will not be dark to you" (Psalm 139:7, 9-12).
So when I feel blind to my own life, I remind myself of my other life partner who is never asleep and has all the vision and I trust him. Again...ego related. Can't escape the ego relation no matter what.
Thank you Derri, you better preach! lol. You have a major annointing on your life.