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Xamaycana View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote Xamaycana Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 26 2013 at 9:48am
Honestly, at his age he is still learning acceptable behavior.  I wouldn't spank for that.  I would explain to him why it is wrong and try to have him empathize with the little girl.  I would be more concerned with the dynamics of the classroom where 3 kids of that age have a chance to gang up on 1 child.  Did the teacher address the issue with the class?

When my daughter was that age, we primarily did timeouts and taking away things she valued-like a favorite toy-usually not for more than a few days.  She is now 4 and a half we still do time-outs but now we are trying to shift the focus to rewarding good behavior. 
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (2) Thanks(2)   Quote reesegurl11 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 26 2013 at 10:05am
You are only suppose to time out for however old they are, meaning 1yr- 1 min, 2yr- 2 min etc...

I use to spank but it did not work like timeout does but each kid responds to things differently so what works for one won't work for another.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Quiann00 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 26 2013 at 10:15am
Originally posted by jonesable jonesable wrote:

My nephew will be three in July.
His parents kneel down and talk to him in firm voices most of the time or he gets sent to his room to calm himself. He goes obediently then asks to come out in 5 min.
 
But he does get spankings when he is outrageous.
Hes a good kid though but when he had a meltdown and throw a car at their new 70 inch TV. His father had a meltdown too and went  outside  sister just told my nephew to go to his room and think.
 
Im glad they didnt spank him then bc they were angry at the time


I do this
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Quiann00 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 26 2013 at 10:19am
Originally posted by sbrownie84 sbrownie84 wrote:

I am glad that this thread came up b/c I have noticed similar behavior problems with my three year old cousin. She has a very bad temper and a habit of hitting and bullying kids when no one is watching. She preys on the weak and when she is reprimanded for taunting the other kids she throws herself down and cries and screams and plays victim...........just like her mother. You ask her to apologize and she says no. 

Recently, I have noticed that she hits  particular boy. Usually he cries and tell on her but this time he gave her a swift kick to her shin. She screamed out. I just shrugged my shoulders and she got over it. 

My problem with her is that she is well aware that she is wrong and continues to challenge authority at such a young age.  It scares me. 

In this case, she needs a spanking.  It's good that the other child hit her back but I have a problem with that as well.  Sometimes when children are getting hit on at school and don't defend themselves, they go home and begin to act out with their parents or family as a way to vent or alleviate their frustrations from school.  So if your cousin is hitting other children, it affects everyone.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Quiann00 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 26 2013 at 10:28am
I grab my son's collar and get in his face with the meanest grimace on my face and tell him that he is making me angry and what he did was wrong.  As soon as I say that he has made me angry, he cries his little heart out. But it is very affective.

He has mild ASD, so hitting him solves nothing.  He will think that hitting is okay and hit me back.  One time, I popped him on his hand to disapprove of his actions and he stuck his hand out there again to get popped again, or he will hit me back...I hit him and he hit me back...So physical discipline doesn't work.  Me getting in his face has been very affective in these 3 years.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Ladybird0724 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 26 2013 at 11:12am
i would just grab his hands, look him in the eye and say "no" or "no hit" in a really firm voice, and repeat that a few times. or have him look at the other child and say, "that hurt him" and show what a nice touch is. a 1yr old isn't going to understand more than that, and a time out for a one yr old (IMO) is ineffective; they do not understand the concept of time and even 5 min may seem like a long time to them. they also aren't even going to remember why they are in time out in the first place. with kids that young, you really have to correct it right then and there.

what is the school doing to correct the behavior? there should be consistency in both places.

also, i would praise positive behaviors as well...if you catch him playing nice, tell him that. it will show that is the kind of behavior that you expect from him.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (2) Thanks(2)   Quote ThatGurlD Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 26 2013 at 11:26am
I used to buy those olympic medal looking necklaces from the dollar store.  I told my sons all the time they were champions.  When they did something bad, I would say, "Uh oh, you're not being a champion.  I need to take your medal until you can earn it back."  You'd have thought the world was ending.  

It was really cute when kids would walk up and say, "Why do you have that?"  and the boys would say, "Because I'm a champion."  

We spanked for extremes but there weren't many.  
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote jonesable Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 26 2013 at 11:38am
Originally posted by ThatGurlD ThatGurlD wrote:

I used to buy those olympic medal looking necklaces from the dollar store.  I told my sons all the time they were champions.  When they did something bad, I would say, "Uh oh, you're not being a champion.  I need to take your medal until you can earn it back."  You'd have thought the world was ending.  

It was really cute when kids would walk up and say, "Why do you have that?"  and the boys would say, "Because I'm a champion."  

We spanked for extremes but there weren't many.  


Aww this sounds nice
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Im_oh_so_hott Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 26 2013 at 11:46am
Jellybean is three now, and she goes to school, i do a combination of timeout, taking things and talking. If i tell her she's being mean, and princesses are always nice and kind and that she hurt my feelings, she'll apologize and chill. When it comes to hitting other kids, it depends on the situation, she's a lot smaller than other kids so she's rough, if she hits first though i guilt trip her into saying sorry.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote Ladybird0724 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 26 2013 at 11:48am
Originally posted by ThatGurlD ThatGurlD wrote:

I used to buy those olympic medal looking necklaces from the dollar store.  I told my sons all the time they were champions.  When they did something bad, I would say, "Uh oh, you're not being a champion.  I need to take your medal until you can earn it back."  You'd have thought the world was ending.  

It was really cute when kids would walk up and say, "Why do you have that?"  and the boys would say, "Because I'm a champion."  

We spanked for extremes but there weren't many.  


aww LOL things like that really work.

i like to tell my kids that they are shining stars when they make good choices. everyone starts off as a shining star on our chart. if you make poor choices, then you become a red star and have to flip it over. once you get xamnt of 10 shining stars, you get a small treat (piece of candy, sticker, pencil, etc).

 the kids have really taken to it...lol once we were passing by the office and a whole class of older kids had gotten into trouble. one of the my kids told them they were red stars, and they got caught for doing sneaky things LOL
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