So I went and got the kitten this morning!
The second I let her out the carrier, she dashed for the space between the wall and the back of the sofa
I had to chase her out, and prevent her from dashing again. Finally got her, picked her up--she didn't hiss, growl, or swipe at me (good sign, lmfao), and I carried her to my room to lay her down on the fluffy pet bed I got for her, near her water dish and food bowls (where I laid out wet AND dry food), across from her litter box, and the first thing she did when I set her down was go hide behind my bed.
I forgot how frustrating a new kitten can be, but it's fine.
I just hope that bish comes out to this litter box to poop and pee when she's ready...