Pantene 'Not Sorry' Video Tells Women To Stop Apologizing So Much
Women: stop apologizing when you have nothing to apologize for.
A new video from Pantene's #ShineStrong series
shows a number of situations where women say "sorry" for things they
shouldn't -- and the results will hit home with many viewers. Studies
show that women apologize more than men,
often for perfectly reasonable acts like, you know, taking up space.
The scenes of women apologizing for asking a question, not immediately
anticipating someone else's needs and asking for something they want or
need are eerily familiar.
In a March 2014 blog for The Huffington Post, Ani Vrabel nailed exactly what the problem is with women apologizing when there's no need to say "I'm sorry":
some point, I began using "sorry" as a synonym for "excuse me." It came
to mean, "I didn't see you there and you startled me!" and "I have a
question" and "I'm carrying so many things that I'm taking up more space
on the subway than usual." It rarely meant, "I made a poor decision or
did something wrong and it impacted you negatively. I recognize this and
feel bad about it and would like to make things better between us."
And in a February 2013 piece for Jezebel, Karyn Polewaczyk suggested that women over-apologize because they feel "undeserving."
"Women are expected to be exceptionally grateful for the crumbs tossed
our way," She wrote. "And so we show our gratitude by cushioning our
wants with a series of, 'I know this is asking a lot, but...', 'I hate
to ask, but could you...' and 'I might sound like an idiot for
wondering, but...'-isms. "
The Pantene commercial also shows what certain scenes look like without an apology -- encouraging women to #ShineStrong.
While it's polite to apologize for, say, hogging the bedcovers, the
commercial does a good job at unpacking something most of us are
probably guilty of and encouraging us to change the habit.
Edited by tatee - Jun 20 2014 at 1:30pm