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No Sex Required for Unfaithfulness to Begin?

 
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PurplePhase View Drop Down
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    Posted: Nov 14 2012 at 3:13pm
  No sex required for unfaithfulness to begin


Many readers said unfaithfulness can begin with sending e-mails and texts.

We've seen literally thousands of comments and social media posts about the tangled web of former CIA Director David Petraeus' career-ending affair. Readers are talking about politics, the timing of Petraeus' announcement and possible long-term impact. But an especially popular theme that keeps coming up is fidelity and faithfulness, to which some readers say they can relate all too well.

So we posted a survey on Facebook asking readers where that line of unfaithfulness begins. Is it fantasizing, flirting, communicating online, hugging, kissing or having sex? We received more than 2,000 answers to our unscientific poll, and as of 2:15 p.m. Wednesday, the majority of respondents said one may stray without ever making physical contact. About 47% of readers said unfaithfulness can begin when people are sending e-mails and texts without their partner's knowledge.

"I think it is the sneaking and lying that make it infidelity as much as the sex," explained commenter Jean Timmels. Another reader, Tess Gipson, said, "When the relationship has to be kept secret from your partner it is wrong. Otherwise you could bring the person in and sit them down in the living room and visit like a friend!"

Drawing the line at sex was the second most popular choice, but it only got 20% overall.

"Kissing, per se, is meaningless," wrote Michael Wilson.

Indeed, other forms of touch like kissing (13%) and hugging (less than 1%) were picked even less often. Some drew the line at flirtatious behavior (11%). We also heard from a few readers about fantasizing, which garnered the most comments but only 8% of the survey votes. Overall, readers seemed to place a lot of power in the mental aspect of love.

"It starts when you are thinking about it," said Belinda Lipscomb. "Because where your thoughts go, your actions will soon follow."

Where do you think unfaithfulness begins?  

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SoutherNtellect View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (9) Thanks(9)   Quote SoutherNtellect Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 14 2012 at 3:15pm
if you wouldn't do it while im there...unfaithful
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (3) Thanks(3)   Quote Rumbera Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 14 2012 at 3:16pm
Let me stop send emails to Idris !
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote LushHair_Fein Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 14 2012 at 3:41pm
Originally posted by SoutherNtellect SoutherNtellect wrote:

if you wouldn't do it while im there...unfaithful
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (3) Thanks(3)   Quote miana79 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 14 2012 at 3:44pm
this is already known - emotional affairs are much worse because you fall in love with the person.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote freedom76 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 14 2012 at 4:17pm
I wouldn't say thinking about it is an affair. Cause lord knows I would be a cheating heifer. BUT as soon as you start hiding any relationship, you have crossed the line. Also if you are doing something you know your partner will feel negative about, stop.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote EPITOME Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 14 2012 at 4:21pm
whenever you're communicating with the opposite sex you should think "could my mate read this email? or would i hesitate to show it to them?"

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote eanaj5 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 14 2012 at 4:24pm
Some people are just stupid and are oblivious to their partner's feelings, so while one may consider it cheating, the other may not see the issue...is it still cheating then?
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote PurplePhase Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 14 2012 at 4:27pm

Originally posted by EPITOME EPITOME wrote:

whenever you're communicating with the opposite sex you should think "could my mate read this email? or would i hesitate to show it to them?"



good point. I know some people say flirting is a no-no but I don't think so and we always tell each other and laugh about it so it's not like secret flirting.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote EPITOME Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 14 2012 at 4:29pm
Originally posted by PurpleHaze PurpleHaze wrote:


Originally posted by EPITOME EPITOME wrote:

whenever you're communicating with the opposite sex you should think "could my mate read this email? or would i hesitate to show it to them?"



good point. I know some people say flirting is a no-no but I don't think so and we always tell each other and laugh about it so it's not like secret flirting.

each relationship is different and everyone has their boundaries.  imo, you would know your mate's boundaries the best. and you said it best "it's not a secret."  once it becomes a secret....it aint right
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