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need advice #12653

 
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Lady ICE View Drop Down
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    Posted: Jan 01 2013 at 11:57pm
its a slow night for me so...tell me what you think.

#fanmail...
My child's father is not stable. Just the other day he informed me that both he and his gf are no longer employed and that his truck was in the shop and he had no way to get it out. I think he was either thinkin I would help him pay to get it out (no), or suggesting that when school is back in after the Christmas break that I drive to his house every morning that he has our daughter to take her to school and pick her up, even though my college classes start back around the same time, which I chose based on the schedule we typically have.

Am I a bad parent because I told him he needs to figure out how he is going to take her and pick her up from school on his own? What would yall do? I am sick of having to bail him out all the time, I have given them money, food and everything else since we split up and he has never even thought to return the favor and I am pretty sure he only spends time with her so he can claim her on taxes every other year...

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Jr1127 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote Jr1127 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 02 2013 at 12:02am

No I don't think that person is in the wrong.Going to school is important but the child is just as important I wish there was a better way to resolve difference.



Edited by Jr1127 - Jan 02 2013 at 12:04am
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James Avery View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (9) Thanks(9)   Quote James Avery Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 02 2013 at 12:05am
well since he's broke without a vehicle, you shouldn't let your daughter stay with him. if he doesn't have a job or a truck, how is he going to feed lil mama and get her to and from school every day?


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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ThatGurlD Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 02 2013 at 12:05am
How old is the baby?  IMO, you can be a little late for kindergarten but not junior high and high school.  You are not a bad parent but you have to be careful of how much his "figuring it out" will affect your daughter.  Best of luck to you OP.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote carolina cutie Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 02 2013 at 12:05am
Originally posted by Lady ICE Lady ICE wrote:

its a slow night for me so...tell me what you think.

#fanmail...
My child's father is not stable. Just the other day he informed me that both he and his gf are no longer employed and that his truck was in the shop and he had no way to get it out. I think he was either thinkin I would help him pay to get it out (no), or suggesting that when school is back in after the Christmas break that I drive to his house every morning that he has our daughter to take her to school and pick her up, even though my college classes start back around the same time, which I chose based on the schedule we typically have.

Am I a bad parent because I told him he needs to figure out how he is going to take her and pick her up from school on his own? What would yall do? I am sick of having to bail him out all the time, I have given them money, food and everything else since we split up and he has never even thought to return the favor and I am pretty sure he only spends time with her so he can claim her on taxes every other year...

Confused

Anywho, he sounds like a loser but unfortunately that loser is the father of her child and she's stuck dealing with him. I think it's good that she is trying to allow her daughter to see her father as much as possible but it appears she is doing a lot of giving.

Maybe they can work something out where the daughter stays at his house on the weekends while the mom attends college courses. That way it won't affect her mornings? Or maybe he can join her by taking college courses to better his life and his childs'. Too much to ask?
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (3) Thanks(3)   Quote ShadyLady Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 02 2013 at 12:06am
As long as he only expected rides for or concerning our child, I would do it. No sense in depriving my child.cuz her daddy is slippin. If its that much of a hassle, I would just have her come stay with me so I don't.have to commute to his house.

He better not dare asks for rides for himself or his girl tho.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (2) Thanks(2)   Quote sexyandfamous Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 02 2013 at 12:17am
Let him figure out how to pick her up and take her to school.
If he cares that much about his child he'll come up with something that involves him moving his as$ and not you driving around.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote sexyandfamous Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 02 2013 at 12:19am
Just remember, every time he asks you for something, remember that he is your daughter's father and if she sees him as a leech whom is taken care of by her mother, she will grow up believing that she needs to take care of a man or that men are losers.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote Tbaby Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 02 2013 at 12:21am
Originally posted by James Avery James Avery wrote:

well since he's broke without a vehicle, you shouldn't let your daughter stay with him. if he doesn't have a job or a truck, how is he going to feed lil mama and get her to and from school every day?



If the OP can legally do this, IA the kid shouldn't be staying with him.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (2) Thanks(2)   Quote ms_wonderland Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 02 2013 at 12:40am
I wouldn't do it. He can try the bus.

Sidenote...ppl without cars or a license should not have kids.
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