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Forum LockedMy relationship...I dont know what to do...

 
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Beehmyn View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 11 2009 at 6:50am
Originally posted by xtrushorty54x xtrushorty54x wrote:

We do have children, Her faher is different but he has been there since the day she has been born and we jusr had another child...and now we are fighting abot that. Beacuse he treays his son better than my daighter.


I'm not Dr. Phil, nor have I been in a similar situation, but that last sentence right there would be enough for me to say, "bye, bye, bye." I read something about this in my psychology class. I forget the scientific name, but it is basically an addiction. The theory is that one reason people keep holding on to something that's not making them happy is because the withdrawal process is equally unpleasant.

You have to do what's right for you, but please don't ever feel like you can't leave a relationship that's making you unhappy.
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pghbeautydoll View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 11 2009 at 7:04am
Bingo, its the kids. Sad but true when you have kids and your not married time will tell and I am not looking down on you, I have children as well and I am not married but you have to shyt or get off the pot.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 11 2009 at 7:09am
you two have what I like to call the convenience relationship. Its more business than personal. Get out more enjoy one another away from the home. Plan more family outings do things that can take away the trapped air and arguments and if that still does not work then you know what you need to do. Misery loves company but when it turns into a party what is the point ?
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mocherry View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 11 2009 at 7:11am
space, patience, prayer, and time.....
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glamrock View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 11 2009 at 7:12am
PGH hit the nail on the head.
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Tangie View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 11 2009 at 7:15am
ITA with both of pgh's posts.
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Samirah View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 11 2009 at 8:00am

Write down all the things that bother you about him (him treating his son better than your daughter being #1,2,&3) ask him to do the same. I know its hard but without vengence try and talk those things out ...don't say

'You piss me off when you do this etc" Try

"It hurts me or upsets me when this happens" or this is How I feel when you speak to me this way etc.

At the same time write down things about yourself you know you can CHANGE and say

Sometimes I know I overreact to a situation when I should come to you and talk to you about it etc...

I know you are dealing with a rough 7month old right now but both of you need some couple time etc

Now I don't know if this will work but it sounds good on televisionSmile

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Chyna_Li View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 11 2009 at 8:01am
Originally posted by rinthecutie rinthecutie wrote:

Absence makes the heart grow fonder...
 
this
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smartgirl88 View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 11 2009 at 8:09am
perhaps some counseling would do some good?.. try going to a local church and talking with the pastor...maybe you guys just need to up your communication game.
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StylingArabella View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 11 2009 at 8:20am
Originally posted by xtrushorty54x xtrushorty54x wrote:

We do have children, Her faher is different but he has been there since the day she has been born and we jusr had another child...and now we are fighting abot that. Beacuse he treays his son better than my daighter.


Not good! There must have been resentment from long time ago for someone to shut down on a child. It is almost like his love was temporary/conditional for your daughter. There is nothing that can justify him acting that way. In what way does he treat your son better than your daughter?

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