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judging someone based on how they treat family

 
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sbrownie84 View Drop Down
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    Posted: Jan 30 2013 at 11:56pm
I am in the beginning stages of a possible friendship with this girl. She is cool, but I am a bit concerned with the way that she is treating her family. Over they years her family has had a great disdain for her bf and that has put a separation between them. The guy isnt neccessarily a winner but her choice. 

However, I find it hard not to judge her because she chooses not to talk to her family at all including her mother and father. Her mother has a chronic painful illness that will only get worse and she does not even say hello to her mother when she collects her items since she moved out to live with the guy. 

Am I wrong to judge her.
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ShadyLady View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ShadyLady Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 30 2013 at 11:59pm
Nope. If her fam were good to her and she gave them her ass to kiss, just imagine how she'll do you.

You put petty ish to the side when sickness and death come into play.
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miana79 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (3) Thanks(3)   Quote miana79 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 12:07am
You are wrong to judge her! there i always more to the story, how do you know how they treated her growing up??? some people cant be happy for someone's life choices because they are not living it the way you want them to.
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ThoughtCouture View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ThoughtCouture Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 7:37am
i may not judge out of the gate.  but it would definitely activate my spidey senses...
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EPITOME View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote EPITOME Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 7:39am
Originally posted by ThoughtCouture ThoughtCouture wrote:

i may not judge out of the gate.  but it would definitely activate my spidey senses...

it's the same as observing how your future mate treats his family.
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newdiva1 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (2) Thanks(2)   Quote newdiva1 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 7:41am
U need the whole story.  As we all know family can do you the wrongest and hurt u the deepest.  Find out why she treats them the way she does before u judge.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote TokyoRose Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 7:48am
It depends.  Usually, if someone does not get along with their parents and they don't talk much about it and they do not speak to the parents, I don't judge unless I get the whole story.  If they are calling the parent all sorts of names, then I absolutely do.  It may not always be what they say, but how they chose to act in a certain situation that would raise my eyebrow.
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nitabug View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote nitabug Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 8:21am
why do you like her?
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iSMILE13 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote iSMILE13 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 8:25am
Originally posted by EPITOME EPITOME wrote:


Originally posted by ThoughtCouture ThoughtCouture wrote:



i may not judge out of the gate.  but it would definitely activate my spidey senses...


it's the same as observing how your future mate treats his family.
this!
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missdeeluxe View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote missdeeluxe Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 31 2013 at 8:29am
I think it depends.
I was a bit worried when I first started seeing my S.O. because he doesn't have much of a relationship with his family, but then I met them and I can see why.

Either way if they were rude or disrespectful towards their parents, grandparents, etc. I would judge them because that's not how I was raised.
I think you can have a distanced or limited relationship with family and still be civil.
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