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Topic ClosedI Hate My Boyfriends Family, With A Passion.....

 
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jonesable View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 20 2013 at 5:12pm
Lol nevermind Model.

I have a feeling you're typing something long and it probably still won't be centered on what I'm asking.

So I'll just say ok in advance
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modelbusiness82 View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 20 2013 at 5:14pm
Originally posted by jonesable jonesable wrote:

Model , ok can we pause for a second withy the rambling.

I'm talking about in a friend context.
So you only see your friends in a business perspective?

That's it that's all?




I enjoy motivating, but I need to be motivated as well.  Honestly, at this point in my life, I don't keep friends who aren't upwardly mobile and it so happens that the majority of my close friends and I share the same industry and are doing similar deals because we share the same interests and have each others backs because we came up through the ranks together. So there's a definite blurring of the lines. I have a handful of friends from my HS days who don't bring anything but their smile and fun convos, and that's fine too.

I know that concept is foreign to many people, but I guarantee you that anyone who's a successful business professional in the upper 1% tier aren't surrounding themselves with ppl who can't bring anything to the table but their face. Again, this isn't to say that they don't have ppl like that in their life, but that's not the majority of their social set.

It sounds cold to some, but I'm a really driven person - especially at this point in my life.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 20 2013 at 5:17pm
My friends are all in different arenas.
From education to engineering and were young but ill say we're off to really good starts.

My professional and political connections I've made no I don't consider friends.
Do I go to lunch with them? Yeah
Out for drinks sometimes?sure
There is a difference in my book when it comes to a friend.

I don't look at my friends for what they can do for me
It goes way deeper than that.

That has nothing to do with being ambitious and driven

Edited by jonesable - Feb 20 2013 at 5:25pm
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 20 2013 at 5:22pm
i think its people who are overly concerned with being upwardly mobile who view their friendships in that way. you can have friends who are ambitious people, but you dont see a big deal with helping them out. 

im young, i guess im just not concerned with how much 'investment' i've put into my friendships. 
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modelbusiness82 View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 20 2013 at 5:25pm
So Jones, let me ask you a hypothetical:

Say you have a friend who you constantly selflessly help every time they need it (and for the purpose of this hypothetical, it really is ERRYTIME). One day you need something from them - and it's within the realm of possibility for them to help you. But they dont for a weak reason.

Would you say "oh well, it is what it is" or would you be offended/hurt?

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Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 20 2013 at 5:29pm
Model did you read my previous post and my responses to Beeb?
Probably not and I don't blame you lol.

What I said was I could understand someone feeling slighted and hurt , that is normal and natural.

But saying the help I gave them was in vain and all for naught is extreme.

Edited by jonesable - Feb 20 2013 at 5:29pm
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 20 2013 at 5:30pm
i understand being hurt that your friend doesn't appreciate you. but wouldn't your friend also be hurt that you see them as a project, and not as a favor between friends?

i don't ever want to be that person. whether im 30 or 12.
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modelbusiness82 View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 20 2013 at 5:33pm
Originally posted by SamoneLenior SamoneLenior wrote:


yeah the person you are at 20 is not always the same person at 30, 40, 50 lol


This...

Ask me for $20 bucks or a ride to the store, you can be anybody and I got you.

Ask me to give you career contacts, now I have to look at you as an investment.

That's the point I'm making. Not all requests are equal.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 20 2013 at 5:35pm
Originally posted by modelbusiness82 modelbusiness82 wrote:


Originally posted by SamoneLenior SamoneLenior wrote:


yeah the person you are at 20 is not always the same person at 30, 40, 50 lol




This...

Ask me for $20 bucks or a ride to the store, you can be anybody and I got you.

Ask me to give you career contacts, now I have to look at you as an investment.

That's the point I'm making. Not all requests are equal.


The second is a professional request.
You don't see the difference ?
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modelbusiness82 View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 20 2013 at 5:35pm
I think this is a age differential issue so let's agree to disagree here lol.

In short, if a friend asked you to hook them up with a position at your job, and they effed up to the 10th degree, it reflects on you, and now your boss looks at you as a liability because of your friend's bad judgement. So those kind of "favors" and help are the ones I'm talking about. Not basic requests.
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