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tvlady
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Topic: I BC and I think I Regret It Posted: Mar 22 2012 at 9:01pm |
My last relaxer was 6 months ago. I didn't intend to transition but it kind of happened. Eventually my relaxed ends started to break off so I decided wth. I went to a hair salon today, the barber reluctantly did my chop. When he made the first cut, I thought wow I can't believe I'm doing this. I rode the subway home and I just felt like everyone was looking at me. I tried to beat my husband home so I would have a chance to wash it and put some product on it to bring out the curl, but he was home and the look on his face said it all. He hated it. I did wash it and used aveda be curl and qp mango butter and it still looks crazy. Its curly in some spots, straight in others. I'm thinking this might be a mistake, but there is no going back from a big chop
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NataleeC
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Posted: Mar 22 2012 at 9:07pm |
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Wigs are always an option.. braids, weaves (if you have enough hair tp do it) can be great "in between" styles until you have adjusted to your natural hair. It may seem as if you've made the worst mistake of youe life, but once you've fully gotten used to your hair, the options will seem overwhelming and endless. Also, once it grows out, you'll be amazed... Just keep it healthy, and it will reward you. Cheer up, the BC isn't for everyone, but now that you've done it, you can only move forward. Your husband will get used to it too. No woreies. :)
Hakuna Matata :D
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NataleeC
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Posted: Mar 22 2012 at 9:08pm |
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*your *worries
Ugh.. stupid replacement phone!!
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mskraizy
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Posted: Mar 22 2012 at 9:16pm |
A big chop is such a dramatic change, it shocks everyone. I felt the same way you did when I first cut off all my hair. And to make it worse, my mother yelled at me for a good day and then the following morning silent treatment so that didn't help. I seriously thought about perming it again and starting over with straight hair.
Give it time to settle on you. My curls didn't really start showing up until maybe 3 weeks of co-washes and deep conditioning. For 6-8 months I fought with trying to be comfortable with my newbie fro, all the while side eyeing perms for my default. It'll be 3.5 years come April and I have enjoyed my journey of being natural.
Chin up girl, it's not an easy change. Actually, I think many people feel how you do after a big chop. I know I did. Everything will be okay and when you hit your first nappyversary and are able to look back and see how far you've come and how much you've learned, you'll appreciate it even more. Your husband will grow to love it (if it's really what you want, he'll have to). It'll get easier, just got to weather the storm. You'll appreciate your hair more once it really starts flourishing.
Just you wait. 
Hope everything gets better for ya!
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tvlady
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Posted: Mar 22 2012 at 9:22pm |
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MsKraizy maybe you are right, I will get used to it. I have like a lopsided fro now because it curled tightly on the right side and then I don't know what its doing on the left. Then there are some straight parts in the back on the right side. I'm like WTH. My mother has done this many times and her hair just curls automatically. But usually when she did it her hair was shorter than mine. I did transition for 6 months so my hair is almost as long as my pinky when stretched. I hope I feel okay with it in time.
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carolina cutie
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Posted: Mar 23 2012 at 1:22am |
Give it some time  My hair felt a dry mess for quite some time after I BC'd because I did not know how to really care for it. I would: DC weekly Co-wash everyday if you want, then seal with oil Wear a hair cap at night. You can wear it in a cute twa/fro for now. You can use your fingers to shape your hair and gently pick apart any curls to get a uniformed fro look. I see so many cute fros now that spring is here, you'll look great!
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Miss Jones
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Posted: Mar 23 2012 at 1:24am |
I bet it looks georgous... I'm sure in time you will find a way to make your hair work for you, until then just know you have a one up on tons of women who are tired of perms but to scared to BC, including me! Just like the other ladies said, keep it healthy and I'm sure you will love it!!!
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Choongy
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Posted: Mar 23 2012 at 3:08am |
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all these ladies have said it all its only been some hours, you have to just try a few things before you get whats right and looks good, i cut my hair off 18months ago best choice i ever made im now almost at APL its been a low and high journey but a fun one at that figuring out what my hair loves and hates keep your head up babe!
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havilland
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Posted: Mar 23 2012 at 7:13am |
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(((((hugs)))))
i can't imagine how you feel. but i do send you support.
(not the same as a big chop, but i will tell you my experience all the times i went to a salon and they chopped without my consent) i would cry about it for a day. then pick my chin up and remind myself that no matter how bad it was on that day, every singe day from that moment forward, my hair was GROWING. it will GROW. it won't stay that short forever. (one time i called my mom and had her bring a scarf to the salon because i refused to walk outside with my hair that short....sigh.......)
i would encourage you to deep condition and take care of your hair so that your hair is in it's best condition. then see what "she" can do. be creative. look for new options.
keep your head up. you are beautiful no matter what.
also, try not to be mad at hubby. you don't like and neither does he, so you two agree. that makes you simpatico! remember you are a team. as you progress through this journey, you both will find a happy place.
good luck!
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honniecake
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Posted: Mar 23 2012 at 10:48am |
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i can't imagine the humility. i am sorry you experienced that hun...when you knew it was beneficial to you but everyone else can't seem to swallow. it hurts now but i bet you it'll get better. hair is hair. you can always style it and manipulate the curls how you want. a twist out or a braid out. maybe even wear braids for a while. that would help.
HTH. please update us.
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