Black Hair Media Forum Homepage
BHM BHM BHM
Forum Home Forum Home > Lets Talk > Relationships
  New Posts New Posts RSS Feed - how to approach a guy?
  FAQ FAQ  Forum Search   Register Register  Login Login
 

how to approach a guy?

 
 Post Reply Post Reply Page  <12345>




The Best Human Hair Available with No Service Match

Author
jonesable View Drop Down
Elite Member
Elite Member
Avatar

Joined: Oct 12 2010
Location: SC
Status: Offline
Points: 266078
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote jonesable Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 06 2012 at 12:55am
I don't have the guts to approach so I just let them come to me.
But you can and I don't makes that makes you look bad .
As long as you don't come off as thirsty

Hey they say Michelle approached Barrack...

Edited by jonesable - Nov 06 2012 at 12:57am
Back to Top
Sponsored Links


Back to Top
Becky View Drop Down
VIP Member
VIP Member


Joined: Oct 17 2005
Location: r
Status: Offline
Points: 10065
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Becky Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 06 2012 at 1:22am
Originally posted by Mixer Mixer wrote:

Oh lord, not this "women shouldn't approach men" advice again. That's a good way to leave you wondering "Hmmm, I wonder what could have been.." Us men do like to be approached. I repeat, we do like to be approached. That's not going to affect a possible relationship at all. That would be other, different factors.

Anyway, go find his ass and try to do some small talk. See if he's really worth the time and then see where it goes from there. Being a bit scared is ok. That's just natural. Just don't let it show. Plus, what's the worse that could have happened? Being told no is actual better than wondering what could have happened imo.
Well, the worse that could happen is that she gets involved with a creep that uses her for sex ... and then dumps her. Duh.
 
We already went over this part.Wink Try to keep up. Hee hee!
 
If he says No, it will affect her self-esteem ( which for a woman that is supposed to be confident so that she can ATTRACT a potential male) is wrong. It will make her feel bad about herself as it puts her in a powerless .. position that she is likely to carry over to the NEXT guy she meets.
 
No, it is NOT the same for men. They have to approach women. Period. Men and Women are different. Every generation (including mine) believe that they can redefine this stuff and it works in SOME cases - in terms of equal rights but in relationships. Nooooo this stuff never changes.
 
Men don't sit there and look good that they can ATTRACT potential mates. No. That would a backwards gender role - ask ANY Socialogist (sp? can't spell). Hee hee.
 
As a guy you say you LIKE being approached .. but like I said in an earlier thread ... sometmes guys do not realize what's going on ... subconsiously. They are flattered ... but it never comes to anything but a romp in the sack. It's up to the woman to set the pace of the relationship ..  if she wants something real out of it.
 
(There are exceptions sure .. but that is simular to winning the Lotto and ... how many people do you know that have won the Lotto? So I wouldn't blow all my savings on new shoes .. based on the off chance that I would win the Lotto next week. Ouch)
 
Anyway about 95% of the women on this post have given the OP the correct advice mainly based on their own experiences over many years (like myself). But if the OP is still foolish enough to pursue a guy anyway ... well, she can't say nobody warned her.Confused


Edited by Becky - Nov 06 2012 at 1:42am
Back to Top
Mixer View Drop Down
Elite Member
Elite Member
Avatar

Joined: Feb 11 2011
Location: KS or MO
Status: Online
Points: 87593
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote Mixer Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 06 2012 at 6:48am
Originally posted by Ashleyano Ashleyano wrote:

thanks mixerSmile
SmileI could tell that you wanted to hear some "Go for it" posts instead of "Do nothing". Go for it!Thumbs Up


Edited by Mixer - Nov 06 2012 at 6:51am
Back to Top
Mixer View Drop Down
Elite Member
Elite Member
Avatar

Joined: Feb 11 2011
Location: KS or MO
Status: Online
Points: 87593
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote Mixer Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 06 2012 at 6:49am
Originally posted by Becky Becky wrote:

Originally posted by Mixer Mixer wrote:

Oh lord, not this "women shouldn't approach men" advice again. That's a good way to leave you wondering "Hmmm, I wonder what could have been.." Us men do like to be approached. I repeat, we do like to be approached. That's not going to affect a possible relationship at all. That would be other, different factors.

Anyway, go find his ass and try to do some small talk. See if he's really worth the time and then see where it goes from there. Being a bit scared is ok. That's just natural. Just don't let it show. Plus, what's the worse that could have happened? Being told no is actual better than wondering what could have happened imo.
Well, the worse that could happen is that she gets involved with a creep that uses her for sex ... and then dumps her. Duh.
 
We already went over this part.Wink Try to keep up. Hee hee!
 
If he says No, it will affect her self-esteem ( which for a woman that is supposed to be confident so that she can ATTRACT a potential male) is wrong. It will make her feel bad about herself as it puts her in a powerless .. position that she is likely to carry over to the NEXT guy she meets.
 
No, it is NOT the same for men. They have to approach women. Period. Men and Women are different. Every generation (including mine) believe that they can redefine this stuff and it works in SOME cases - in terms of equal rights but in relationships. Nooooo this stuff never changes.
 
Men don't sit there and look good that they can ATTRACT potential mates. No. That would a backwards gender role - ask ANY Socialogist (sp? can't spell). Hee hee.
 
As a guy you say you LIKE being approached .. but like I said in an earlier thread ... sometmes guys do not realize what's going on ... subconsiously. They are flattered ... but it never comes to anything but a romp in the sack. It's up to the woman to set the pace of the relationship ..  if she wants something real out of it.
 
(There are exceptions sure .. but that is simular to winning the Lotto and ... how many people do you know that have won the Lotto? So I wouldn't blow all my savings on new shoes .. based on the off chance that I would win the Lotto next week. Ouch)
 
Anyway about 95% of the women on this post have given the OP the correct advice mainly based on their own experiences over many years (like myself). But if the OP is still foolish enough to pursue a guy anyway ... well, she can't say nobody warned her.Confused
Foolish, huh? I'm glad I skipped to the end instead of bothering to write out something longer.
Back to Top
Mixer View Drop Down
Elite Member
Elite Member
Avatar

Joined: Feb 11 2011
Location: KS or MO
Status: Online
Points: 87593
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Mixer Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 09 2012 at 2:48pm
Update?
Back to Top
Jess View Drop Down
Platinum Member
Platinum Member
Avatar

Joined: Mar 23 2008
Status: Offline
Points: 59854
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Jess Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 09 2012 at 3:09pm
Originally posted by jonesable jonesable wrote:

I don't have the guts to approach so I just let them come to me.
But you can and I don't makes that makes you look bad .
As long as you don't come off as thirsty

Hey they say Michelle approached Barrack...
Barack approached her a lot of times and she wasn't having it because she was her superior.   He finally wore her down though
Back to Top
Jess View Drop Down
Platinum Member
Platinum Member
Avatar

Joined: Mar 23 2008
Status: Offline
Points: 59854
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Jess Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 09 2012 at 4:47pm
Update?
Back to Top
Ashleyano View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member
Avatar

Joined: Sep 01 2012
Location: Maryland
Status: Offline
Points: 2170
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Ashleyano Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 10 2012 at 12:19am
Originally posted by Becky Becky wrote:

Well, the worse that could happen is that she gets involved with a creep that uses her for sex ... and then dumps her. Duh.
 
We already went over this part.Wink Try to keep up. Hee hee!
 
If he says No, it will affect her self-esteem ( which for a woman that is supposed to be confident so that she can ATTRACT a potential male) is wrong. It will make her feel bad about herself as it puts her in a powerless .. position that she is likely to carry over to the NEXT guy she meets.
 
No, it is NOT the same for men. They have to approach women. Period. Men and Women are different. Every generation (including mine) believe that they can redefine this stuff and it works in SOME cases - in terms of equal rights but in relationships. Nooooo this stuff never changes.
 
Men don't sit there and look good that they can ATTRACT potential mates. No. That would a backwards gender role - ask ANY Socialogist (sp? can't spell). Hee hee.
 
As a guy you say you LIKE being approached .. but like I said in an earlier thread ... sometmes guys do not realize what's going on ... subconsiously. They are flattered ... but it never comes to anything but a romp in the sack. It's up to the woman to set the pace of the relationship ..  if she wants something real out of it.
 
(There are exceptions sure .. but that is simular to winning the Lotto and ... how many people do you know that have won the Lotto? So I wouldn't blow all my savings on new shoes .. based on the off chance that I would win the Lotto next week. Ouch)
 
Anyway about 95% of the women on this post have given the OP the correct advice mainly based on their own experiences over many years (like myself). But if the OP is still foolish enough to pursue a guy anyway ... well, she can't say nobody warned her.Confused
1.this is something i don't understand. i feel like recently the generation i am more receptive to feels like either true relationships don't exist in 2012 or they don't have time to have a relationship but either excuse they just want to use me for sex, but i do not let them.  and they approached me btw.
2. foolish? i had told myself that i didn't want to wait to long to see him again because i didn't want him to forget my face and i would be standing there looking stupid, so considering its been a month i def know he forgot my face. but that doesn't mean i won't bite the bullet in the future who knows


Edited by Ashleyano - Nov 10 2012 at 12:20am
Back to Top
Becky View Drop Down
VIP Member
VIP Member


Joined: Oct 17 2005
Location: r
Status: Offline
Points: 10065
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote Becky Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 10 2012 at 3:16am

Asleyano ... what I am trying to tell you is that EVERY generation believes the same thing - that in XXXX (year) things are different. I heard the same crap when I grew up (and that was a long time ago.) But in terms of what goes on between men and women ... things never change. They cannot change because it's pretty much ... biological.

Why are you hanging around the mall in hopes of running into him? He had his chance and he let you walk away. Take a clue.

And what do you mean ''you don't want him to forget your face'? DUH. 

Hey, a guy that is INTERESTED IN YOU ... is never gonna forget your face. Never.

You will surely get burned time and time again if you continue to take this stance with men.

With guys ... be attractive and flirt a bit .. and let him come to you. Period. If he does not come to you .. FORGET ABOUT HIM and move on! Period.

Otherwiise if you approach him ... you relinquish your 'power' early on,  you will nevvvver get it back in that relationship and it messes you up in terms of what you should do with other guys.



Edited by Becky - Nov 10 2012 at 3:29am
Back to Top
Junior Jr View Drop Down
Elite Member
Elite Member
Avatar

Joined: Jun 26 2009
Location: ✡
Status: Offline
Points: 164407
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Junior Jr Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 10 2012 at 12:14pm
just say "hi"

if he's feeling you, he'll keep the convo rolling and if not, you can keep it moving without making yourself look awkward 

that's the ultimate anti-thirst approach a woman can make. good luck Smile

jr.
Back to Top
Get Longer Healthier Faster Growing Hair
GreatGlam.com
Get Healthier Stronger Longer Hair
The Elite Hair Care Sorority
Electric Cherry Hair
Hair Extensions Wefted Hair Wigs and More
Human Hair Wigs
Wefting Training
Beautfiully Created Human Hair Extensions
The Haircare Solution for Locs and Twists
DHT Blocker System
 Post Reply Post Reply Page  <12345>
  Share Topic   

Forum Jump Forum Permissions View Drop Down