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How do you make it work?

 
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rickysrose View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote rickysrose Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 14 2013 at 1:09pm
My husband had a tendency to touch me any ole where, anywhere, in front of anybody when the feeling took him and he loves pda

Now he just won't do that and when we're home, I don't wear clothes (tmi) ... I can't say when the compromise happened and we've never discussed it in a formal convo, that I remember 

And tbh, im not touchy feely except with him and to a lesser extent my family.  My coworkers know not to touch me but if I saw one that needed a hug or a kind word I wouldn't hesitate.

That's thanks to my husband
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iGotSunshine View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote iGotSunshine Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 14 2013 at 1:10pm
Originally posted by rickysrose rickysrose wrote:

My husband had a tendency to touch me any ole where, anywhere, in front of anybody when the feeling took him and he loves pda

Now he just won't do that and when we're home, I don't wear clothes (tmi) ... I can't say when the compromise happened and we've never discussed it in a formal convo, that I remember 

And tbh, im not touchy feely except with him and to a lesser extent my family.  My coworkers know not to touch me but if I saw one that needed a hug or a kind word I wouldn't hesitate.

That's thanks to my husband
 
that sounds fun lol 
i would wear little booty shorts with heels tho. 
i dont like being allaway naked 
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rickysrose View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote rickysrose Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 14 2013 at 1:12pm
I bring up coworkers because they're people you know but not necessarily close with and you do have squabbles and ok times with them

Closer than strangers yet not necessarily friends that you spend all day with
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote JasmineE02 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 14 2013 at 1:12pm
Does anyone else ask permission or give warnings?  LOL  I always warn my husband if I'm feeling clingy.  He finds it much funnier and endearing than if I just randomly start doing it without explanation.  It might still annoy him a bit, but he's way more receptive.  For someone who isn't adept at picking up on nonverbal cues, it's really helpful.  I also just flat out ask him for what I need.  "You should buy me flowers sometime soon."  "I want to do something that involves dressing up for our anniversary."  He can't read my mind, so I help out a bit. LOL
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote maysay1 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 14 2013 at 1:14pm
Originally posted by rickysrose rickysrose wrote:

I genuinely did not know a hug was this serious

And I mean this in the most shade free way possible




It is for some. Some people do not like to be touched or to touch other people in that way. Like at all. Not family members, not spouses, not even their own children. And they're not autistic, suffering from ptsd, or been a victim of abuse or have anything "wrong" with them. They just don't like it.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote PurplePhase Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 14 2013 at 1:20pm
wow 15 years?
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ThoughtCouture Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 14 2013 at 1:49pm
Originally posted by maysay1 maysay1 wrote:

Originally posted by rickysrose rickysrose wrote:

I genuinely did not know a hug was this serious

And I mean this in the most shade free way possible




It is for some. Some people do not like to be touched or to touch other people in that way. Like at all. Not family members, not spouses, not even their own children. And they're not autistic, suffering from ptsd, or been a victim of abuse or have anything "wrong" with them. They just don't like it.
 
i could understand this thought process a little better than....being affectionate with that other person/thing but not this one (as in the one they are sleeping with lol).  not saying this was part of the wifes reasoning...just responding to something that was thrown out there in this thread.
 
also, i didn't get the sense from the write up that this was her (the wifes) issue...
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ThoughtCouture Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 14 2013 at 1:52pm
Originally posted by EPITOME EPITOME wrote:

Originally posted by rickysrose rickysrose wrote:

You can get happiness from making your spouse happy 

Compromise doesn't have to mean losing 


you can get happiness from making other people happy. point.blank.period. doesn't even have to be your spouse.
 
 
alas...this is my thinking...
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Tbaby Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 14 2013 at 2:09pm
I get so amused reading these marriage threads and most of the single ladies posting "divorce" like thats the correct answer when a marriage isn't sailing along honky dorie.

Their marriage isn't bad--nobody is getting screamed at or hit, no one is cheating, no one is an addict...actually its just existing with 2 persons who love each other yet their personalities are polar opposites basically.

Visiting a marriage counselor would do wonders.  Compromise is what they aren't doing--thus both are miserable.

My hubby is a groper as weill...maybe its a male thingLOL 


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rickysrose View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote rickysrose Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 14 2013 at 3:19pm
Sunshine I'm usually not all the way naked, but Im "naked" for me lol

LOL I better edit before I hear "put some clothes on" in an e-battle

Meanwhile I do wear clothes in the house, just very little 
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