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How do you make it work?

 
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rickysrose View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (4) Thanks(4)   Quote rickysrose Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 13 2013 at 10:07pm
Originally posted by Alias_Avi Alias_Avi wrote:

Honestly sounds like the genders were switched

If they were this would be a typical scenario

If it were reversed, he wouldve been accused of cheating ... out the gate LOL

cold, not wanting sex, aloof would've meant at least one jump off

not she needs to lose weight and find something else to do



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BeatriceBean View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote BeatriceBean Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 13 2013 at 10:10pm
I think that it can work, but I don't know how.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote nycdiva357 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 13 2013 at 10:11pm
the wife is crazy
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (2) Thanks(2)   Quote BoutThatLife Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 13 2013 at 10:25pm
I dont think the wife is crazy, I think dude is probably just annoying.

She probably does miss him when he's not around because he's not breathing down her neck like that, but when he's there he's probably clinging to her like a leech.  Him losing the weight did help because she said that she was more attracted to him. He just cant see it because even though he was in shape, he probably was still clingy and needy.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Flowing-Ice Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 13 2013 at 10:26pm
Originally posted by ThoughtCouture ThoughtCouture wrote:

Originally posted by Gkisses Gkisses wrote:

Additional Info:

Derrick and Tracy did visit a relationship therapist. Derrick stated when he grew up his mom was cold and unaffectionate so he pursued his wife and lavished her with affection only to be rejected time and time again. Tracy says she loves him and hes a great partner. "We are raising great kids together who love us". When derrick takes it upon himself to have alone time Tracy gets anxious about where he is and what hes doing without her. She says she wants the marriage to work and her family to be together. She thinks that things are fine since they never really fight but shes not sure what more she can give to him or if she'll ever be comfortable with amount of emotional vulnerability Derrick is seeking.
 
she sounds special...

lmao!
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Derri Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 13 2013 at 10:26pm
Originally posted by BBpants BBpants wrote:

I love a man that shows me lots of attention and affection. He can marry me. Smile

Me too.
Every night my SO and I cuddle. I sleep in his arms. He comes into the kitchen when I'm cooking and kiss me up. Couldn't be with a man who wasn't affectionate.


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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote nycdiva357 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 13 2013 at 10:27pm
she says she wants space.
he gives her space.. and then she wonders what he's out there doing.

she dont wanna fawk when he's fat..
she don't wanna fawk when he's skinny.

they hump once a week-- and shes proud of that.. like thats good.


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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Sang Froid Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 13 2013 at 10:29pm
I wonder if she has daddy issues....since he has mommy issues.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote newdiva1 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 13 2013 at 10:29pm
Originally posted by rickysrose rickysrose wrote:

Originally posted by Alias_Avi Alias_Avi wrote:

Honestly sounds like the genders were switched

If they were this would be a typical scenario

If it were reversed, he wouldve been accused of cheating ... out the gate LOL

cold, not wanting sex, aloof would've meant at least one jump off

not she needs to lose weight and find something else to do



 
 
 
 
truth.  but like it's been mentioned.....him thinking to change her was his mistake.  That is not her fault. 
 
It's been 15 years......why is this a prollem now as opposed to 2 years or 5 years into the marriage I wonder?
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote maysay1 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jan 13 2013 at 10:33pm
Originally posted by Derri Derri wrote:

Originally posted by BBpants BBpants wrote:

I love a man that shows me lots of attention and affection. He can marry me. Smile

Me too.
Every night my SO and I cuddle. I sleep in his arms. He comes into the kitchen when I'm cooking and kiss me up. Couldn't be with a man who wasn't affectionate.




And you couldn't just change from being the type of person who wants affection shown often to being the type of person who wants it rarely, if at all. It's just who you are.

I think it's unfair (and ridiculous) to expect either one of these people to change their natures. In this case, the mistake is his because he went into thinking she was going to change a fundamental part of herself.


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