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how do you get over being cheated on

 
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Lady ICE View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Lady ICE Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 29 2012 at 3:12am
get a call blocker app. and a text blocker. you can get them for free. i had them on my berry curve. saves you a headache.
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Becky View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Becky Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 24 2012 at 2:47am
Originally posted by val48066 val48066 wrote:

you're too vulnerable to remain friends. how long until that vulnerability translates into ex-sex? he wants to have his cake and eat it too. 
 
Now THAT'S the truth.
 
OP: Don't let that man make a fool out of you!
 
How do you get over being cheated on?
 
- have a good cry, maybe take off work for a week and cry for a while
- sit down and write him a YOU MOTHERF.... LETTER where you tell him exactlly how you feel. Do not mail it. It's for your benefit ... not his
- block his emails, phone, text you name it. Have no contact whatsoever
- go to the spa, have a massage, get a new hair style, have a facial, have your feet and nails done, try a new lipstick - SOMETHING BRIGHT
- meet your girls for lunch and dinner and reconnect! TALK
- get on your 'glad rags' and go to the club or the pub
- be happy and outgoing
- MEET ANOTHER GUY
-go out the following weekend and
- MEET ANOTHER GUY
... and so forth - DATE!
 
You'd be surprised at what's out there and how much happiness another guy can bring into your life
 
Go out there and LIVE! (mother pushing the chick out of the nest!)


Edited by Becky - Nov 24 2012 at 2:58am
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missunfoolish View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote missunfoolish Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 24 2012 at 5:42am
im tryiiiiing.
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Becky View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote Becky Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 24 2012 at 7:12am
He's dog Thumbs Down and dogs never change .. they just try to 'get over' on weak women again and again.
 
When he's done with you .. he will move on to the next 'victim' but if there are no more victims for these sort of men to be with they will have to change .. or be alone. Alas .... there are so many victims so eager to volunteer for the position of 'doormat' out there that he never has to change.Unhappy That's the problem.
 
This is EXACTLY how women get entangled in abusive relationships. (Read the zillions of rediculous stories on the forum alone.)
 
- The guy does something wrong .. the girl knows he's wrong but because she is lonely, has low self esteem,  whatever .. she goes back to him.
 
- Guy lies and continues to cheat or disrespect her .. she tolerates it because she think she's put too much time into him to let him go.
 
- And the crap just escalates because he has no motivation to change is behavior .. as he knows you will except it. DUH!
 
- Meanwhile the girl just feels worse and worse about herself and sometimes gets caught up in other damaging behaviours like overeating, drinking, sitting home alone, suicidal or maybe she gets violent etc...
 
There's no telling where this will all end ...  but in all the cases I have watched on talk shows and seen in real life .. the guy NEVER just takes it on himself to stop this bad behavior and suddenly start being a good guy. Never happens. Again, what would be his motivation?
 
It's on you .... and I could predict that in a couple of years you will be making a post about some ratfink man that lives with you and you can't leave ... because you are afraid of him! Gosh, how many times have we read THAT story on BHM?
 
THIS IS THE WAY Domestic Violence situations START. DV situations don't START with the guy hitting you. Nooo they start with the way he treats you, then it's the words he says to you .. then one day he hauls off and hits you across the face and THEN you realize that you are in a DV situation - but by then IT'S TOO LATE!
 
No, I am not saying this guy will go this far. I am saying that THIS IS HOW DV situations begin.Dead
 
Nobody goes out on a date with a guy and at the end of the evening he hauls off and pounches you in the face and then expects another date the following week. Noooo because he knows AT THE LEAST you will not see him again .. and AT THE MOST you will call the cops.
 
No, DV men have to pick at you bit by bit. They have to chop you down to a size that they can manage and when you are broken down emotionally POW that's when they lay their hands on you. By then ... you are to beat down mentally ... to leave.  It's called 'Battered Wives Syndrome'.
 
Again, I am not saying this guy is gonna be this bad.
 
But in general that's why you cannot tolerate BAD BEHAVIOR from a guy. PERIOD. A girl that has a sense of her own power in this world is gonna be gone IMMEDIATELY if not sooner. Approve Another sort of girl will take him back and hope for the best. Dead
 
You have to REQUIRE more of yourself.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote khivey Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 24 2012 at 10:03am
Sounds like your ego is bruised more than your heart.
Don't play the game..you'll get over it sooner. If you want to talk to him, talk to him...and the whole friend thing is just a way of ending things on a good note. You'll be over him soon and look back and wonder what you were thinking dealing with him anyways. Life has a way of getting in the way of your plans..we don't know it at the moment, but it is always for the good.
You'll be alright
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote missunfoolish Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 24 2012 at 8:01pm
thanks for the words. just when i talk to him
i just cant let it go. i get mad & start bringing up the incident.
i just havent let it all out yet & im mad i havent.


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Becky View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Becky Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 25 2012 at 3:39am

Well, you can never GIVE so much of youself to someone such that if that person withdraws .. you will be devastated. This is where you are now and that's why you can't let it go.

Again ... REQUIRE more of yourself.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote missunfoolish Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 25 2012 at 7:18am
this my chance to finally let go
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Spokenword Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 25 2012 at 2:01pm
Originally posted by missunfoolish missunfoolish wrote:

thanks for the words. just when i talk to him
i just cant let it go. i get mad & start bringing up the incident.
i just havent let it all out yet & im mad i havent.


 
what is it that you want to get out? he knows that you are hurt, he knows what he did.  do you think what you havent let out yet will change anything? i think the best thing he can see you doing is not see you dwell over him and you doing your own thing.
 
hang out with your girls, date, volunteer, hobby, busy yourself.  don't let your mind wonder.  you have to work to change your thought process. know that there will be someone betetr for you out there. don't let him have so much of you, it is draining.  take things day by day, hun.
 
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote 313chick Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 25 2012 at 3:00pm
Originally posted by Jess Jess wrote:

Hug
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