Thanks. It was doing it on stretched hair instead of hair that was just detangled well and smoothed out. my curl pattern would immediately jenk it up no matter how long i left them in when i did it that way. i banded my hair to stretch it. i happened to wear my hair out and stretched once or twice before attempting the braid out(not sure if this has anything to do with it, but that's how we got to where we are with it today lol).
And I only do 3 big braids. I had been doing several medium ones all that time because that's how i had seen it done. but i have fine thin hair so it was just making them too crimpy and limp instead of big and wavy. I redo mine every night instead of leaving it loose and continuing to day 2, 3, 4 etc. I moisturize and seal in those three sections spritzing all over with shea moisture baobob and aloe thickening mist (no reason, just using it up and using something water based) and GENTLY detangle just a little with a widetoothed comb to help with smoothness in the braid. I say gently because the hair isn't sopping wet with conditioner or anything super slippery to help minimize breakage. I then smooth on my whipped shea butter mix. I smooth each piece of every pass of the braid so it's super smooth.

then i put them in a ponytail ontop of my head and put my satin cap on. take down in the morning and they are smooth and shiny and come apart creating body easily. before it was all flat and frizzy and tangly.