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HELP CANCER MAN UPSET..WHAT TO DO?

 
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Printer_Ink View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Printer_Ink Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 13 2013 at 1:48pm
Originally posted by Twisted_Angel Twisted_Angel wrote:

Unknowingly hes helping me heal
I would like to do the same for him. Hes never cursed me out. Me when i get mad it's like .fk u.. Im calling him all types of names and doin crazy .bs.. and he tolerates all of that..now how it's gonna look as soon as he gets upset i run..? Im not like that. Sorry.
 
So you are now makng EXCUSES for his bad behavior because what YOU call HIM names?
So now it's what? ...  YOUR fault and he tolerates .. you? Again, Wow.
 
(Symptomology):Typical battered woman syndrome symptom and I'll bet you every other thing you say next in this thread .... will be symptomatic of the same because you will have to somehow make all the stuff he does to you .. your fault. Ouch
 
Sorry ... but you are a victim.


Edited by Printer_Ink - Oct 13 2013 at 1:50pm
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jonesable View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote jonesable Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 13 2013 at 2:08pm
Girl you know how BHM is....
LEAVE HIM GIRL


But yeah he had a crazy emotional response to something that didn't seem like such a big deal.
I wouldn't say leave him but you know how BHM does.

Now Printer is saying you have battered Women's syndrome?

Y'all are just sensational .

Let me go back and re read I have to be missing something

Edited by jonesable - Oct 13 2013 at 2:10pm
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote sexyandfamous Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 13 2013 at 9:44pm
Twisted, people from the cancer sign are in fact emotional and that means that they can be very romantic, or sentimental, or can easily give in to their emotions, be either aggression, sadness, melancholy and so on.

Don't call him. Let him contact you back even if takes a month. The thing that struck me the most on all that you wrote is that he was driving careless when your child was in the car. If you don't mind that he can switch into an emotional crazy being, fine, but your child doesn't have to deal with that.

When he does contact you, meet him in person, sit down with him and explain to him that you would appreciate if the next time he does feel upset at himself, to NOT put your child in danger.

Remind yourself this: your child is a gift, men will come and go. You might not be with this man 5 years from now, but your child will be in your life, and to make sure your baby will remain in your life, NO MAN should drive like a maniac on the road when your kid is in the back seat.

And on another note, I agree with Printer; he does sound unstable which can be dangerous. I had an ex who, as a child, saw his dad hit his mother and he thought it was a disgusting act. I would cuss him out when I was mad and he would be stunned but not say a word - until one day he SWITCHED and struck me. I don't care that your man never laid a hand on you, one day he might do, but since you don't believe it will happen, at least have a convo with him and talk about keeping your child SAFE, regardless of his feelings about himself.

Your child's safety should always come first, I don't give a damn if the man is having a breakdown.
Remind yourself that. I don't even have a child and I am f*cking pissed that he almost killed your kid.


Edited by sexyandfamous - Oct 13 2013 at 9:46pm
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Twisted_Angel Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 13 2013 at 10:42pm
Tyvm! he did call me and apologized and we spoke in person..Im not use to emotional men..he says hes gonna work on it but if he try some .bs like that again im done cuz u dont put a child in danger..period.

It's the first time he did that i was very surprised and angry.


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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Twisted_Angel Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 13 2013 at 10:44pm
Needed to hear that. We wanna have kids..Im glad Im able to keep him calm..he said he was still miserable today until he heard my voice (that better be true!).if he woulda came at me with sum .bs today i would of ended it.

Edited by Twisted_Angel - Oct 13 2013 at 11:09pm
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Twisted_Angel Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 13 2013 at 10:58pm
Damn printer lol...didnt realize i was makin excuses but u right i cant really say nothin to that.

He was still a lil upset today but more cautious of
he baby which is cool. He told me i was right and he didnt want to lose me and willin to do whatever it takes to keep me. He doesn't have any kids...so his mindframe is a lil different

normally when talk to him about somethin he really tries hard to work on it.

Sorry u went through .bs s&f if another man puts his hands on me
Im goin to jail..





Edited by Twisted_Angel - Oct 13 2013 at 11:10pm
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Twisted_Angel Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 13 2013 at 11:00pm
Originally posted by jonesable jonesable wrote:

Girl you know how BHM is....
LEAVE HIM GIRL


But yeah he had a crazy emotional response to something that didn't seem like such a big deal.
I wouldn't say leave him but you know how BHM does.

Now Printer is saying you have battered Women's syndrome?

Y'all are just sensational .

Let me go back and re read I have to be missing something



U r hilarious! Lol
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Twisted_Angel Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 13 2013 at 11:07pm
It's hard when u on the outside lookin in but sexyandfamous did make a point..Thats the only thing that pissed me off. But i like to hear people's opinions good and bad..helps me grow..

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote jonesable Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 13 2013 at 11:24pm
I didn't realize the part about him driving reckless with your baby in the car.

:( I don't like that
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Printer_Ink Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 14 2013 at 4:33am
Originally posted by Twisted_Angel Twisted_Angel wrote:

Needed to hear that. We wanna have kids..Im glad Im able to keep him calm..he said he was still miserable today until he heard my voice (that better be true!).if he woulda came at me with sum .bs today i would of ended it.
 
Ummm you are '.....glad Im able to keep him calm..'
 
Clue: You cannot keep a grown man .. calm and it is not your responsibility or role in a relationship to keep your partner calm. It is the responsibliy of trained counselors to keep a grown man ... calm..
When he says stuff like this that he was miserable until he heard your voice.. he is binding you to him by telling you something that you want to hear. That way you will feel important and that he needs you.
 
Manipulative.
 
I don't care if he has apologized now etc .. you are setting you and your child up for a fall if you continue to ignore the red flags staring you in the face about this guy.
 
And.. you wanna have kids? Sorry .. but your judgement is POOR it you would bring yet another innocent child into this situation. Having a chilfd WILL NOT help this situation. If you want to help this situation you need to insist that he attends couples counceling.
 
You should not be in the positiion that 'If he puts his hands on you .. you are going to jail'. What will become of your child? Off to foster to care to be warehoused and abused like so many other Black kids.
 
Again, you need to step away.
 
(Shrugs) It's your life though.
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