past month my fiance Erick and I moved with our 8 month old daughter
from the West Side of Chicago to the Northwest suburbs, about 25 miles
North of Chicago. Despite not having very much money (I'm a stay-at home
Mom), we made the costly jump from “the hood” to “the burbs” in the
interest of our daughter's safety. I'm sure I don't need to detail
Chicago's crime rates for you, the news is doing a bang-up job of that
We made this move thinking it would *slightly* more
expensive than living in the city, but worth it in the long run. My mom
had offered us the use of her car for Erick to commute to work, so that
we might be able to save some money to buy our own car. Well wouldn't
you know it, that fell through, and we had to buy a car 2 weeks after we
moved, in order for Erick to not be fired for “lack of reliable
transportation”. We had about $1,000 saved at the time, and had to put
all of that plus an additional $250 that we literally did not have (they
held the check for a week until we did) down as a deposit on the car.
In addition, the first payment of the car insurance ended up costing
$150 more than the other installments, again a down payment of money
that we did not have. We still haven't purchased the $55 city sticker,
because we can't afford it and I'm praying that we don't get a ticket.
paying all this money that we couldn't afford for a car, we have no
money left for our bills. This month's rent is $1208, and after that is
paid, we have $26. Just $26.
We still have to pay a $225 gas bill
(from our old house), as well as our phone bill ($186), Comcast ($150),
not to mention gas for the car and money for incidentals (laundry,
toiletries, diapers, pet food, etc). We are already on food stamps, but
that doesn't go very far because we have to also buy formula for the
baby, and my 17 year old brother is also staying with us right now.
have now realized that we can't stay in the apartment that we just
moved to, because my Mom (whom I have an incredibly strained
relationship with) retains ownership of it and comes and goes as she
pleases. When I confronted her about this last week, she informed me
that it was still her house (though she now lives in a different
apartment in the complex), that she would continue to do as she pleased,
and if I took issue with it my family and I were “free to vacate the
premises”. Essentially, she was letting me know that my house is not my
own (despite the rent that we pay), and if we did not submit to her
wishes, we could kick rocks. That is the sort of relationship we have,
and I'm sure it's understandable why I wouldn't want someone with that
attitude randomly popping up while I'm trying to go about my day. We
still want to live in the suburbs of course, but we now need to come up
with enough money for a deposit/1st month's rent in order to move again, on top of all of our other bills.
to say, all of this is taking a toll on our family. Erick already works
2 jobs for a total of 63 hours per week, and he gets to see his
daughter for maybe 2 hours each day. I have been battling severe
depression and anxiety on/off for the past 10 years, and due to
insurance being totally sh*tty, I can't see a doctor until we get
married (and I get coverage thru him) next year. Obviously, stressing
about money is not healthy for anyone, much less someone with my issues.
It is taking a serious toll on my mental health, and lately I have been
getting more and more depressed, to the point where I am literally
crying myself to sleep because I don't know what to do. I have thought
of suicide recently, but it's not because I want to die. It's because I
can't envision a way out of this hole and sometimes I think that not
waking up would at least be less stressful than this.
help us. Even $1 helps, and the money that you donate will go towards
paying off our bills, moving to a less anxiety-filled environment, and
maybe giving Erick a day off so that he might be able to spend some
quality time with our daughter.
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